Thursday, 19 December 2013

Santa Claus Versus The Zombies (2010)

Written and directed by George Bonilla, who obviously managed to raise a budget of about $500, Santa Claus Versus The Zombies is awful. It's the kind of film that makes me hate the fact that I have to make an effort to describe the plot and name some of the people involved while writing up a full review.

Or I could just tell you that this film stars a bunch of amateurs with little to no talent (sorry to tar everyone with the same brush but nobody here is going to be shortlisted for any major awards in the next few years), including Billy W. Blackwell as a Santa Claus, Cassidy Rae Owens, Alex Del Monacco and Claude Miles, and the plot is summed up in the title.

The movie alternates between scenes set in a besieged home and scenes set in a abandoned factory/warehouse military bunker/command centre. The people who are under attack from zombies in their home are hard to care about, while the military personnel bickering about the best way forward are even harder to care about, which leaves viewers with a movie that gives you nothing to be invested in.

There may well be some people who think I'm being too harsh. I support independent cinema, and I think it's important to keep taking chances with my many viewing choices, but just because a film is independently made by someone who has, fair play to them, managed to scrape together enough money for a budget, and a bunch of actors willing to work for either very cheap or completely free, doesn't make it something that I will be kind too, JUST because it got made. It's always better to be honest, however harsh that may seem.

This isn't the first feature from Bonilla, who actually has about ten movies listed on IMDb (with one being an anthology that he contributed to), so it's not even a case of someone making numerous mistakes as part of a steep learning curve. No. It seems that the man thinks that this sub-standard fare is actually acceptable to people who will watch anything. People like me.

It's not acceptable, and it's not enjoyable. Avoid it at all costs.


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