Against The Dark (2009)

Steven Seagal is back to doing what he does best. Scowling through a face that resembles a half-melted rubber mask based on the features of the Dalai Lama. And also fighting. But this time he's fighting vampires. And he's onscreen for a very short amount of time. Perhaps that's why Against The Dark defies the odds to be a reasonably enjoyable Seagal movie. Oh, it's still not anything great but it's at least watchable, has some decent bloodshed here and there and throws in just enough action to remind you that it's an action movie as well as just a vampire film.

Starting off how it means to go on, Against The Dark feels very much like a mix between I Am Legend and Resident Evil. With the bonus of the added Seagal factor. There's a nondescript cast of folk going about a vampire-infested area. And Seagal leads a bunch of hard-ass vampire hunters. Keith David also gets a few scenes, which doubles the watchability factor. The presence of Linden Ashby is also acceptable. As for Tanoai Reed, Jenna Harrison, Danny Midwinter, Emma Catherwood and all of the others - they turn up and do a decent job.

The script by Matthew Klickstein is pretty weak but nobody chooses to view a Seagal movie to discover the next greatest movie quote of the century. Things meander from start to finish, a few action beats are there (with plenty of unnecessary editing tricks) and there are some vampire moments that are surprisingly impressive.

Director Richard Crudo may not have made any kind of masterpiece, but he's easily made one of the more enjoyable Seagal outings in recent years. Which is enough reason, in itself, for me to be most thankful to the man.

Action fans will most probably be disappointed but undemanding fans of the horror genre may, like me, find enough here to at least merit a viewing. It's still not good enough for me to ever seriously consider watching again in the future but it was mercifully painless while playing in DVD player.

5/10.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Against-Dark-DVD-Skye-Bennett/dp/B001L4I2LI/ref=sr_1_1?s=dvd&ie=UTF8&qid=1329432783&sr=1-1

Wild Things: Diamonds In The Rough (2005)

Who knew when Wild Things first arrived on cinema screens that it would spawn a bunch of sequels all built around the exact same structure? This second sequel is once again written by Andy Hurst and Ross Helford (who wrote the screenplay for the previous movie) but the directorial duties are handed over to one Jay Lowi. To be fair to Lowi, Tangled (the 2001 teen-friendly thriller and not the 2011 Disney movie) was a movie at least belonging underneath the same umbrella as this one and showed that Lowi could handle such material.

Serah D'laine and Sandra McCoy are the two young women at the centre of the activities this time around and this time everything seems to revolve around a nice pair of diamonds. There are numerous twists and turns, once again, but the shorter runtime dictates that the plans start to unravel faster than ever before and that the mystery is, once again, nicely wrapped up in time for a number of enjoyable revelations shown during the final credits.

The cast are okay. D'laine and McCoy make up for their lack of any in-built name recognition with an attempt to be a bit raunchier and more willing to shed clothes than Susan Ward and Leila Arcieri were. Dina Meyer is relatively well known and does just fine. Linden Ashby reprises his role from the previous movie and does a bit better this time around. Then we have Brad Johnson and Ron Melendez, both doing what they have to do with their roles though both stuck with weaker characters.

Once again, this is nowhere near as good as the first movie. It's quite dull for most of the runtime and everything just feels a bit . . . . . . . flat. BUT the last-minute revelations are a bit more enjoyable, thanks to being a bit different from the previous pattern, and there's still some fun to be had from the central concept if you're an undemanding viewer not expecting anything great.

4/10.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Wild-Things-Diamonds-Rough-DVD/dp/B0007RUSTO/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1326565851&sr=8-1

Wild Things 2 (2004)

Six years after the cool and sexy first movie, along comes this sequel to show how you can take almost exactly the same material (in some instances even the scene structure is almost EXACTLY the same as in the first movie) and turn a winning formula into complete sewage.

If you've seen the first movie then none of the twists and turns will surprise you. If you haven't seen the first movie then why the hell are you considering even watching this instalment?

Jack Perez directs and I can't help thinking that all he did was watch the first movie. Of course, this isn't the worst thing he could have done. After all, Perez is now the man perhaps best known for giving the world the supreme and jaw-dropping Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus. (best sold to anyone who has yet to see it with THIS clip). Ross Helford and Andy Hurst wrote the screenplay for this and the next outing in the series so no worries there. Of course, they also wrote the screenplay for Single White Female 2: The Psycho. Oh dear.

Which means that we have nothing but a rehash of the first movie from a group of untalented people behind the camera. Hopefully, a few good stars onscreen could pick things up a bit. Well, not really. There are some decent people in front of the camera (Susan Ward is just too cute for me to dislike and Isaiah Washington is a very good actor and certainly the best thing in this film) but there are also just as many folk you won't care about one little bit. Leila Arcieri as Maya King is just annoying, Joe Michael Burke is far too bland, Linden Ashby is okay and that's about it, nobody else really gets to make any impression.

Overall, Wild Things 2 is just like Wild Things (even the dvd cover is almost a carbon copy). Without the talented cast. Or smart script. Or style and sexiness. Or any trace of originality. Despite so many failings, however, it's still a bit of an entertaining watch thanks to the way it follows the structure of the original so closely. There are even a number of reveals during the end credits which end up being almost as much fun to watch as the revelations in the first movie. Almost.

4/10.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Wild-Things-DVD-Susan-Ward/dp/B0000WSTMY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1326474094&sr=8-1