Prime Time: Frogs (1972)

Some days you want to head to your local cinema to see the latest horror genre releases, some days you are browsing titles available online and see a thumbnail image for Frogs. I am not saying the latter is a good turn of events, but it’s how I ended up deciding to watch this movie. I knew nothing about it, aside from the title, but I was ready to be bemused and delighted. Well . . . I was certainly bemused.

I don’t even know where to begin with the plot summary for this. You may think you know the central plot idea, frogs gone wild, and it’s certainly part of the experience, but there are actually various creatures turning deadly here (including snakes and spiders). The main characters are a wildlife photographer, played by a discomfortingly bare-faced Sam Elliott, and a large family, headed up by patriarch Ray Milland, who live in the middle of a swamp area that is about to become much more dangerous to humans.

Directed by George McCowan, calling this balderdash is actually overselling it. McCowan doesn’t do much to help the material, the visuals are ugly and there’s not one bit of energy in any of the moments you might call set-pieces, and the script, written by Robert Hutchison and Robert Blees, isn’t even awful enough to laugh at. It’s just dull, with no characters to feel invested in and no real feeling of proper threat.

Elliott tries hard to be a solid central figure, even without the power of his moustache to help boost his screen presence, but he cannot overcome the weak material he has to work with. Milland is equally powerless, although he has one or two fun moments that allow him to grandstand in front of people who are forced to stay in his company. The rest of the cast includes Joan Van Ark, Judy Pace, Mae Mercer, Lynn Borden, Adam Roarke, and David Gilliam, none of whom really stand out. And numerous unidentified frogs, of course.

If you want a silly animal attack movie that is actually fun, but still quite awful, then I recommend Night Of The Lepus (the infamous “giant rabbit” movie). In fact, I recommend almost anything over this one, which is poorly-made and, worst of all, consistently dull. This would have been a very different film if directed by William Grefé, I know that much, and I think I will wash this one out of my brain by revisiting my Grefé boxset. 

Awful stuff, and not just because they missed the opportunity to use the tagline “Frogs . . . everybody croaks.”

2/10

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Prime Time: Prancer (1989)

If you are going to make a movie about a reindeer that may belong to Santa then you may find yourself in a bit of a quandary. Everyone knows Rudolph, but the bright red nose would be a dead giveaway. The other reindeer all look like normal reindeer, as far as I am aware, but people may not remember the other names. Prancer is a decent choice, paired up with Dancer in the seasonal rhyme. For future reference, the nine reindeer that pull Santa’s sleigh are as follows: Rudolph, Prancer, Dancer, Cupid, Stupid, Donna, Blitzkreig Bop, Basher, and Smasher. Thank me later. No need to check those names. That list is absolutely guaranteed to be absolutely correct.

Anyway, this film is about Prancer. Maybe. It’s a reindeer that is wounded, and a young girl (Jessica, played by Rebecca Harrell Tickell) becomes convinced that he is Prancer. Her aim is to get him fit and ready to rejoin Santa by Christmas, which means housing and feeding the animal without her father (Sam Elliott) finding out. She will also be trying to hide her actions from her abrasive brother (John Duda), while enlisting the help of the local vet (Abe Vigoda) and approaching a seemingly grinch-like neighbour (Cloris Leachman) with an offer that will allow her to earn some money for a big bag of food.

Director John Hancock doesn’t have a very memorable filmography, and nor does writer Greg Taylor (although he did later work on the much-loved Jumanji), but I have to say that both men do some great work here. It’s not groundbreaking, and it is completely predictable, but this is a comforting watch, feeling very much like a seasonal special episode of something like The Waltons or Little House On The Prairie.

That’s not to say that all is sweetness and light throughout. Times are tough, very tough, and there’s extra tension, and extra risk for our young lead, when Jessica finds out that her father is planning to send her away to stay with an aunt (played by Rutanya Alda). Hiding a reindeer isn’t likely to get her in the good books, but Jessica considers it to be an invaluable service, not only helping a wounded animal, but also ensuring that Christmas goes ahead as planned.

The cast all do a very good job, and make the film much better than it otherwise would have been. Tickell is a well-rounded young girl, as swift to pout and sulk as she is to widen her eyes and plead for help. She’s very cute, but also has moments of entertaining cheek/meanness (a highlight being the scene in which she believes she has been betrayed by her friend, played by Ariana Richards). Elliott has a strong fanbase for good reason, and he’s very good as the strained father who doesn’t realise why his children cannot understand his pragmatic way of dealing with the harsh reality threatening their home and way of life. Duda is enjoyably irritating, from his snide insults to his ear jewelry, but he gets to improve a lot in time for the grand finale. Then you have the mighty Vigoda and Leachman, both giving wonderful little turns in their respective roles, and both allowed to show how our lead helps to soften their sharp edges and turn those frowns upside-down. Alda does well enough in her small role, and eagle-eyed viewers will spot a very brief turn from Johnny Galecki.

Technically, nothing really stands out. The score from Maurice Jarre is pleasant enough, although not that memorable, and there’s sparing use of special effects implying those little moments of Yuletide magic that are often accompanied by a twinkly sound effect. This is all about the gentle joy of a talented cast helping to deliver a tale that effectively mixes some good humour (special mention of the sequence that has Elliott constantly just missing the sight of the reindeer walking around his property) with a lot of heart.

I know that some will find this a bit dull, and maybe not festive enough, but I ended up liking it way more than I expected. I recommend it as a bit of a gem to people who have already worked through their usual selection of festive film fare.

7/10

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Prime Time: Road House (1989)

About as '80s as they come, Road House features a lot of fun lines, some bruising fights, a "Bigfoot" truck, a great soundtrack (featuring Jeff Healey, who also appears in the film, and other artists), and the nigh-unbeatable combo, for some of the screentime, of Patrick Swayze and Sam Elliott. Cheese, yes, but it's some of the best brie that you can indulge in from this decade.

Swayze is Dalton, the best bouncer in the business (referred to throughout the film as a "cooler"). He's observant, smart, and very tough. Which is why he ends up being hired by Tilghman (Kevin Tighe), a man who wants to make a roaring success of his business, the Double Deuce. Unfortunately, Tilghman's business is located in a town that is choking from the grip of the rich and powerful Brad Wesley (Ben Gazzara). Brad employs a number of people, many of them helping him to collect funds from local businesses, but his main right hand man is Jimmy (Marshall Teague). It's only a matter of time until Dalton has to face off against Jimmy and co. 

Directed by the aptly-named Rowdy Herrington (this was his second directorial gig, and most likely remains his best), Road House is a star vehicle for Patrick Swayze that should appeal to all, as long as you're ready for the kind of movie that it is. The script, by David Lee Henry and Hilary Henkin, knows just how to keep viewers engaged throughout, mixing in some humour with the action, and helping the pacing along with the introduction of various characters (alongside those already mentioned, Kelly Lynch appears as Doc, a potential love interest, and then everything moves up a notch when Elliott steps into the plot, as Dalton's BFF, Wade Garrett).

The first big fight scene may feel like a cross between The Blues Brothers and Airplane!, but most of the blows feel like they land, and feel impactful. Swayze is not only swoon-inducingly handsome, but also looks convincing whenever he's in fighting mode, especially when it's a bigger challenge (as it is against Jimmy).

The highlights of the movie are the scenes in which Swayze and Elliott are together, undeniably, and both shine in their roles, with the former easily proving his winning status as a leading man and the latter just being the bundle of laid-back charm he usually is. Gazzara is an enjoyably cold villain, flanked by the tough Teague and a ridiculously flirty Julie Michaels (playing Denise, someone else won over by the obvious appeal of Dalton). Lynch is stuck in the typically thankless role required for this kind of film, and she's okay, while everyone else, from Tighe to Healey, gets to have much more fun. I won't mention everyone else, which is a shame as the supporting cast is full of so many enjoyable little turns, but I'll at least namecheck Red West, John William Young, and Kathleen Wilhoite.

It's not wanting to strain your brain, it's not wanting to cause any seismic shift in cinema, Road House is just out to entertain you. Action and attractive women are there for a lot of male viewers, action and some hunky men are there for a lot of female viewers. And it has a level of homo-eroticism running through it that almost rivals Top Gun. It's highly recommended.

8/10

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The Man Who Killed Hitler And Then The Bigfoot (2018)

Yes, it's that film with the sensational title that isn't really how you think it is going to be, The Man Who Killed Hitler And Then The Bigfoot is an interesting little gem, largely thanks to the main performance from the wonderful Sam Elliott, but it's hard to think of who it will appeal to. Genre fans will be left disappointed by the lack of certain elements while those who may appreciate the tone and themes of the film more will very likely be put off by the sensational title.

Anyway, despite it seeming redundant, here's the plot. Sam Elliott plays Calvin Barr (as does Aidan Turner, portraying the character when we see his past in a number of flashbacks). Barr is an ex-military man who seems to be doing his best to live a life of peace. Unfortunately, that's not going to be. He's approached by men who know about his past to do something now that he is uniquely qualified for. It's a mission that will stir up a lot of memories, and not many of them are good.

The feature debut from writer-director Robert D. Krzykowski, this is a very strange beast indeed, no pun intended. If you're not sure of how you might feel about any aspect of it, view it as a film that at least serves the noble purpose of giving Sam Elliott a wonderful lead role. If you like Elliott then you should at least find something to enjoy here, thanks to the scenes that make the most of his wonderfully hangdog expression and air of tired resignation.

Everything is well put together, even as it all feels slightly rambling and inconsequential, but it all lifts up when things become clearer in the second half, in terms of both the main thematic strand being explored and the real heart of the central character.

Elliott is cast about as perfectly as could be. You may not believe that he has done, or could do, what the title states, but you can easily believe that he is a man who has thought long and hard during many times in his life. He seems like a man who can take a moment to weigh up the pros and cons of any situation and then, no matter what it costs him personally, can be counted on to do the right thing. This film would be nothing without him, no matter the decent work put in by Turner, Larry Miller (giving a wonderfully understated performance), and Caitlin Fitzgerald (sweet and shining like a light in the storehouse of memories that our lead wanders through). The other person to note is Ron Livingston, although his role is a stereotypical American agent out to persuade someone who doesn't want to do the job that it is in their best interests to do so.

I'd really like to comment more on what this film is actually about but that would spoil the pleasure of discovering it for yourself. Give it a watch, don't expect anything as silly as the title suggests (although it's not really mis-selling itself), and enjoy basking in the wonderful charismatic glow of Sam Elliott for a small part of your day. What more do you need?

7/10

You can buy the movie here.
Americans can buy it here.

Milius (2013)

John Milius has had his hand in more major movies than you could possibly imagine. Every inch the alpha male, he's never been a shy man, which makes him a great subject for a documentary. This particular examination of his life chooses to relate various anecdotes in between allowing other people to heap praise upon the main man.

Francis Ford Coppola, George Hamilton, George Lucas, Martin Scorsese, Michael Mann, Oliver Stone, Steven Spielberg, Sam Elliott - that's a great list of names. Each and every one of those men have plenty of compliments for the larger-than-life Milius, and every one of them does a good job of reminding viewers just why they should love the cinematic output of someone who is so often neglected by film fans. There are also quotes from his children, and various studio executives, as well as some others (too many for me to mention here).

If I listed all of the films that the man helped to craft I would be here all day, and you would get bored. Suffice to say, Milius is more than just the man who gave Conan The Barbarian a decent movie. But even if he hadn't done much more, that alone would have been enough to win him a fairly big fanbase.

As a look at the man, and his movies, this is good stuff. There are no major revelations here, and no probing insight into the life that turned Milius the boy into Milius the man he is today. Although it doesn't paint Milius as a saint, something that I'm sure he would have strenuously objected to anyway, it does serve as nothing more than an outright celebration of the man, warts and all. There's nothing wrong with that, it's a fun watch and this man deserves to have some more people appreciate his work, but it's worth noting for the benefit of anyone after anything a bit deeper.

Recommended for anyone who grew up with no small amount of affection for macho flicks from the '70s and '80s, from Apocalypse Now to Red Dawn, and from Dirty Harry to Dillinger, this is fun for fans, and anyone who might become a fan after remembering how much pleasure they have derived from the featured films over the years.

7/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Milius-DVD-Joey-Figueroa/dp/B00ECVPP62/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1399737995&sr=8-1&keywords=milius

And while shopping around, don't forget my book that I won't let people forget.

The UK version can be bought here - http://www.amazon.co.uk/TJs-Ramshackle-Movie-Guide-Reviews-ebook/dp/B00J9PLT6Q/ref=sr_1_3?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1395945647&sr=1-3&keywords=movie+guide

And American folks can buy it here - http://www.amazon.com/TJs-Ramshackle-Movie-Guide-Reviews-ebook/dp/B00J9PLT6Q/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1395945752&sr=8-1-fkmr0&keywords=TJs+ramshackle+mov

As much as I love the rest of the world, I can't keep up with all of the different links in different territories, but trust me when I say that it should be there on your local Amazon.

Tombstone (1993)

As is sometimes the way, Tombstone is a fantastic film that really seems to have defied some long odds to come together as well as it has. Kevin Jarre, who wrote the main script, was initially due to direct the film, but was fired just after he directed a number of scenes featuring Charlton Heston. George P. Cosmatos is the man who now has his name listed as director, but Kurt Russell played just an important, and maybe even more important, role in getting everyone back in the game and getting the movie finished. It's not surprising. Russell had a plum starring role in a movie chock full of great actors being allowed to do great things.

The film is all about Wyatt Earp (Russell) and his brothers (played by Sam Elliott and Bill Paxton) as they settle into life in Tombstone and try to enjoy some peace and quiet. Doc Holliday (Val Kilmer) is also in town and it seems like everyone may get to enjoy life a bit more with the days of being a lawman in Wyatt's past. But people don't always get what they plan for and Tombstone soon starts to see more and more violence in its streets, so much so that the pressure mounts for Wyatt to return to his old role. That is something that he just doesn't want to happen, but he may not have a choice in the matter if some of the more trigger-happy cowboys keep causing so much trouble.

Kevin Jarre's script was, apparently, pared down quite a bit from its initial size, but what's here is all good stuff. There are some superb lines of dialogue and characters are well sketched out. Despite how densely populated the film seems, everyone is given a decent share of the screen-time. Oh wait, that's not quite true. All of the men are given enough time and space, but most of the women in the movie are given fairly short shrift. Dana Delany fares better than most in the role of Josephine Marcus and Paula Malcomson and Joanna Pacula have one or two good moments, but Lisa Collins and Dana Wheeler-Nicholson needn't have bothered turning up, considering the little that they have to do. In fairness, the film is a look at Wyatt Earp and his friends and family and that famous gunfight at the O.K. Corral so decisions would have been made to keep the focus on the men about to get themselves involved in a historic shoot-out.

The direction, from whoever was in the big seat, is absolutely fine, but the cinematography, set design, etc. all pale in comparison to the work done by the casting department. Simply put, Tombstone has one of the best casts in a 1990s movie that you can think of. Let me just reel off the better-known names and see how long the list gets: Russell, Elliott, Paxton, Kilmer, Delany, Pacula, Powers Boothe, Michael Biehn, Charlton Heston, Jason Priestley, Stephen Lang, Thomas Haden Church, Michael Rooker, Harry Carey Jr, Billy Bob Thornton, Billy Zane, Wyatt Earp (you read that right, he's a distant relative of the lead character), Terry O'Quinn and the voice of Robert Mitchum.

Feel free to re-read that list and soak up just how much quality is scattered throughout it. The fact that, despite so much competition, this film ends up being owned by Michael Biehn and Val Kilmer, in their separate scenes and also any that see them sharing the screen, just shows how good those two actors are. One moment in particular, with Biehn's Johnny Ringo showing off his gun-twirling skill before being delightfully mocked by Kilmer, is up there with the very best in the Western genre (maybe even THE best, in my opinion). Russell is very good in the main role, as you'd expect, but Wyatt Earp is the unshowy, earnest heart while Biehn and Kilmer get to be a lot more flamboyant and fiery.

While not an entirely perfect film, Tombstone somehow manages to put so many individual great moments together that it feels almost like an instant classic. It becomes more than the sum of its parts, but that's because all of those parts are so well cast.

9/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Tombstone-The-Directors-Cut-DVD/dp/B001QOGXPU/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1363068604&sr=8-1