The Munsters (2022)

Yes, the trailer for The Munsters was terrible. Yes, having Rob Zombie at the helm meant that many people were wary of the project. Yes, I knew I would have to watch it one day anyway. That day was today (theoretically . . . reviews are sometimes scheduled a long time after particular viewings). While I would never class this as a new favourite, and while I wouldn't put it at the top of any ranked list of Rob Zombie movies, I had much more fun with The Munsters than expected. Love or hate it, Zombie has delivered something more in line with the spirit and tone of the TV show than any other attempts to reboot or revamp it over the years. 

The film is split into roughly three sections. First of all, Lily (Sheri Moon Zombie) seems unable to find someone decent to fall in love with, despite the advice of her father, The Count (Daniel Roebuck). Meanwhile, Dr. Henry Augustus Wolfgang (Richard Brake) and his assistant, Floop (Jorge Garcia), are busy working on what the doctor hopes will be an astonishing creation. That creation turns out to be Herman Munster (Jeff Daniel Phillips), a bit less astonishing than hoped, due to the fact that his piecemeal body has been reanimated with a less-than-stellar brain implanted in his skull. The second section has Lily and Herman falling in love, all thanks to Herman charming her with his mix of rockstar attitude and entertainingly lame "dad jokes". Third, it's time for The Munsters to find a new home, and fans may already know the address they will end up making their own.

This isn't necessarily going to win over people who dislike the films of Rob Zombie, and it's not guaranteed to change your mind if you decided to give it a chance after hating the awful trailer, but I'll take a chance on saying that fans of The Munsters may be pleasantly surprised by how much this gets right. The cast, with one notable exception, feels pretty perfect, helped by superb make-up on everyone, and the script is unashamedly cheesy and creaky in a way that emulates the TV show without being slavishly obsessive about trying to deliver a carbon copy.

There's plenty of people ready to criticise Sheri Moon Zombie, a woman who has her husband to thank for the great majority of her acting career, but she's not actually a bad fit for the role of Lily. She makes some strong choices in her performance, a lot of hand movement being the most obvious, and she's the weakest of the leads, but she works quite well. I also enjoyed her small secondary role, as I enjoyed the secondary roles for Phillips (who actually plays three characters here), Roebuck, and Brake. Moving from the weakest to the strongest, Roebuck is so good as The Count that you can imagine Al Lewis giving his blessing to the performance. Phillips arguably has the toughest task, nobody can ever truly replace the beloved Fred Gwynne, but his version of Herman Munster is an enjoyable mix of the familiar - his childishness and sense of humour - and the ever-so-slightly new - the performer - that still embodies the spirit of Herman. Brake has a lot of fun (particularly as Count Orlock, in some scenes throughout the first act that are some of the funniest moments in the film), Jorge Garcia and Sylvester McCoy are the kind of assistants/employees you expect to be alongside these characters, and there are some enjoyable cameos from Catherine Schell, Cassandra Peterson, and a few others you really have to keep your eyes, and/or ears, open for.

Feeling more like a TV movie than a, well, non-TV movie, The Munsters cannot ever make you forget that you're watching something quite cheap. That's fine though. Adapting the show into a film doesn't mean throwing money at it. Zombie and co. make use of well-dressed stages, plenty of accessories you would find in any Spirit Halloween store, and a nice selection of brightly-coloured lights, including some fun neon signage (and I'm referring to Count Orlock again). Everyone involved knows that they're not trying to make a classic slice of cinema. They're trying to make a Munsters movie. While not getting every single decision right, they largely succeed.

Would I watch this over the original TV show? No. Would I rush to rewatch this? Also no. I would rewatch it though, and I suspect I will enjoy it a bit more during a repeat viewing, especially knowing that I don't have to worry about anything being as bad as that trailer implied.

6/10

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Lost At Christmas (2020)

It's Fort William. It's almost Christmas. Rob (Kenny Boyle) decides to get down on one knee and propose to the woman he has been in a relationship with since high school. She turns him down. Jen (Natalie Clark) decides to surprise a man she is in love with, taking a bag of gifts with her. She's upset to learn that he is happily settled in for the season with his wife. And so begins a typical tale of two mismatched strangers who head on a road trip, attempting to get home in time for Christmas. They can reach the village of Glencoe, and an inn populated by people who seem to be avoiding the usual Christmas festivities, but can they get any further?

Expanded from the 2015 short, Perfect Strangers, Lost At Christmas is a film that would be easier to dismiss if it wasn't working within the parameters of a standard Christmas movie. The character development is, well, it's thin on the ground, and everything that happens is done in a decidedly unrealistic, tick-the-tropes-checklist, way. But it's a Christmas movie, and everyone knows how I judge these movies differently from other types of movies.

Director Ryan Hendrick, who co-wrote the film with Clare Sheppard (both having worked together on the original short), wants to make something that adheres to the rules of this kind of thing, but only until he wants to commit a u-turn on things and show that the rules are there to be broken. Except . . . well, we very rarely watch Christmas movies to see the rules being broken. We watch them to know what we're getting. It's a testament to the quality of the film if it can impress and amuse viewers while working within the limitations of "the genre". Sticking to the rules until you don't want to just somehow feels like a cheat.

The leads do well in their roles, but Clark is the better of the two. She has the energy and enthusiasm, while trying to cover up her own pain for a lot of the runtime. Boyle is fine, but spends a lot of the film looking a bit too much like a cold Rick Astley to be completely likeable. The supporting cast is made up of a number of familiar Scottish faces, or faces familiar to Scottish viewers, including Sylvester McCoy, Sanjeev Kohli, and Clare Grogan. Frazer Hines also has fun in his role, the buddy of McCoy's character, both old men dispensing wisdom and wry asides whenever they're onscreen.

There are some laughs here and there, and the obligatory third act turnaround for people who have been resistant to the charms of Christmas, but the rest of the movie fails to follow on from a solid opening sequence. There isn't any major last-minute revelations, no tension is created (even though tension created in these movies is fleeting, as we know what needs to happen), and the very last scene . . . well, the less said about that the better. 

I still enjoyed this enough. I'll just never want to revisit it, and can't highly recommend it to others.

5/10

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The Owners (2020)

It’s a premise we have seen before, in various ways, but The Owners has a lot of grim fun with the premise of some crime-minded people breaking into a house that has some dark, potentially deadly, secret hidden within.

Sylvester McCoy and Rita Tushingham play the elderly couple who have their home invaded by some youths who intend to empty their safe. Ian Kenny is Nathan, who has also brought along his girlfriend, Mary (Maisie Williams). Andrew Ellis is Terry, a slightly timid lad who seems to have a crush on Mary. And then you have the tough leader, Gaz (Jake Curran). Once the group starts to meet some resistance from their elderly victims, Gaz is the one willing to go further than anyone else to scare, or hurt, people who are between him and his potential payday. Why wouldn’t anyone just have over their money? What do they have to hide?

Based on a graphic novel, Une Nuir De Pleine Lune (by Hermann and Yves H), director Julius Berg makes an impressive feature debut with something that manages to take viewers through familiar territory while saving one or two decent plot turns to try and make the third act a pleasant surprise. And it works, thanks to the performances, and the script, co-written by Berg and Mathieu Gompel, with some help from Geoff Cox.

Although Williams may be the main draw here, to those that know her so well after years spent watching Game Of Thrones, there isn’t really a bad performance from the main players, and both McCoy and Tushingham are a treat in every scene. Starting off completely sweet and innocent, and vulnerable, the two then get to have a lot of fun once things start coming undone. Both are on top form, but Tushingham is particularly good in the way she seems to ebb in and out of clarity, making you wonder if she has dementia or is sometimes playing up that notion.

Some may roll their eyes during the first half, worried that it is all a bit too silly and cliched. Stick with it, I would say it is worth your time, at least until you get to see the older characters become more active. Then you can enjoy a few moments of viciousness, some fun cat and mouse action, and an impressively twisted final act.

7/10

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