June-Claude Van Damme: Nowhere To Run (1993)

The funniest thing about revisiting the filmography of Jean-Claude Van Damme is finding out how others view his films, and also finding out that some of them weren't the popular hits that the younger version of me thought they were. Take this film, for example. I thought Nowhere To Run was an easy success for JCVD. It wasn't. It made money, but it didn't make lots and lots of money.

The plot sees Van Damme playing an escaped prisoner who ends up being in the right place at the right time for one single mother (Rosanna Arquette) who is being given a hard time by developers who want her to sell her home and stop getting in the way of a potential gold mine (metaphorically). Joss Ackland is the main baddie, but he uses Ted Levine to oversee the actual dirty work, and also makes use of a local law enforcement officer (Lonnie, played by Edward Blatchford).

Based on a script by Joe Eszterhas, Leslie Bohem, and Randy Feldman, Nowhere To Run is simply an updated riff on Shane, with extra moments that allow the leading man to either take his clothes off or ride about on a motorbike and look cool (or allow his stunt double to do that anyway, which is how it appears in a number of scenes). The pacing works well, despite this being far from the most action-heavy of Van Damme's movies from this time, and the characters are developed just enough beyond the paper-thin to help you care about how things pan out.

It helps that the cast all do a good job. As well as the two leads warming up to one another throughout, leading to some gratuitous nudity and sexy sex time, you get decent turns from Ackland and Blatchford, and a scene-stealing performance from Levine, who benefits the most from the script. You also get a couple of great child performances, from Kieran Culkin and Tiffany Taubman, both of whom latch on to Van Damme with an ease and innocence that kids can have within their first encounter with an adult they decide is okay by them.

Director Robert Harmon does decidedly okay work, but it's a shame that he didn't decide to shake things up a bit, either in terms of some more creative acton sequences or in terms of giving more time to character moments for Arquette and Levine, the former underserved and the latter having so much fun that viewers could have been rewarded by having more of him.

Nowhere To Run remains an enjoyable slice of entertainment, and Van Damme exudes enough charisma here to make it feel completely natural that the film was adapted to fit him into the lead role, but it's also very disposable, and ultimately easily forgettable.

6/10

The disc be here.
Americans can purchase it here.

Hogfather (2006)

Based on a book by the prolific, and fantastic, Terry Pratchett, Hogfather is very much a Christmas movie in all but name. You see, it takes place in the fantasy universe created by Pratchett, on a main planet named Discworld, and during the holiday of Hogswatch (which is equivalent to our own Christmas, with gifts being delivered by a fat man who squeezes down chimneys - the Hogfather of the title). But strange things are afoot on this Hogswatch. There's a cunning assassin (Teatime, not pronounced how it is spelt, played by Marc Warren) who wants to stop children believing in the Hogfather, in order to set off a chain of events that he thinks may even stop the sun rising. Because belief is a powerful thing. Death (voiced by Ian Richardson), and his assistant (Albert, played by David Jason), does what he can to keep the belief alive, delivering gifts and essentially becoming the Hogfather for a night, but his actions alone may not be enough. Fortunately, he may receive some help from his half-human granddaughter, Susan (Michelle Dockery), and a bunch of wizards (led by Mustrum Ridcully, played by Joss Ackland). As the night plays out, some may die, while others may pop into existence for the very first time. Because belief IS a powerful thing.

Directed, and adapted from the source material, by Vadim Jean (who also then helmed The Colour Of Magic), Hogfather is perhaps a slice of festive entertainment enjoyed best by those not as familiar with the works of Pratchett. The introduction sets things up quickly and easily enough, before going on to develop the story in a way that allows viewers to play catch up. Of course, those familiar with Discworld will find more little details to enjoy, but I find that every adaptation of Pratchett's work suffers, simply by being unable to translate the many little gags and footnotes into anything cinematic. The same problem, unsurprisingly, to arise when film-makers try to mine the equally rich imagination of Douglas Adams.

Hogfather, with its more familiar holiday setting (as already mentioned, this is a Christmas movie in all but name) fares better than most. The mix of great characters and fun special effects (both practical and computer-generated, all suited to the tone of the material) helps, the script provides some laughs once it gets into the second half, and the cast are all pretty great in their mix of quirky roles. It's worth noting here that this was created as a two-part TV movie, and the second half is certainly more consistently entertaining than the first half.

Ian Richardson may provide the voice only, but he gets to portray one of the most beloved characters in the Discworld universe. As surprising as it may seem, Death is always good company, and this movie treats him as well as he deserves. David Jason, Michelle Dockery and Joss Ackland are all just fantastic in their roles, while Marc Warren is a lot of fun, but stuck with interpreting one of the stranger characters onscreen (in terms of mannerisms and speech). Support comes from a talented bunch, including Nigel Planer, Tony Robinson, Craig Conway, David Warner, Stephen Marcus, Sinead Matthews and many more, with nary one poorly delivered line between them.

Different from almost anything else you could choose to watch in December, Hogfather hits all of the required notes, but gives everything a fun twist. And it has Death in a "Santa suit", so what more do you need?

6/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Hogfather-2-Disc-DVD-David-Jason/dp/B000MRP3Y4/ref=sr_1_3?s=dvd&ie=UTF8&qid=1387817671&sr=1-3&keywords=hogfather

Crescendo (1970)

Crescendo is another lesser-known Hammer movie that stands firmly in thriller territory, as opposed to the many solid horrors that they released. Funnily enough, while the movie was running I couldn't help but think of Amuck! The two have superficial similarities here and there, but the latter movie is a much more enjoyable experience.

Stefanie Powers plays Susan Roberts, a young woman who travels to the South of France to work on her thesis about a famous, deceased composer. While there, she is lucky enough to be shown a lot of hospitality by the composer's widow (Margaretta Scott) and his son (James Olson). But maybe that's not such a good thing, especially as she starts to see how strange they are.

With the addition of a creepy manservant (Joss Ackland) and a scheming maid (Jane Lapotaire), this thriller really overcooks everything in a way that could have been entertaining if the central character interactions were more fun. Sadly, they're not and the film suffers because of it.

The direction by Alan Gibson is not lively, or stylish, enough to elevate the weak script by Jimmy Sangster and Alfred Shaughnessy. Nobody involved has the courage to make things darker or sleazier, which is why a movie like Amuck! will always play better (hey, if there are many failings elsewhere in a movie then darkness and eroticism can help a lot . . . . . . . just look at the likes of Basic Instinct and anything from 20 years ago starring Shannon Tweed).

Stefanie Powers is okay in her role, as beautiful as ever and almost believably manipulated into sticking around even as things get curiouser and curiouser, while Margaretta Scott and James Olson roll their eyes and go over the top whenever possible. If you can watch Olson in the second half of the movie without thinking of one or two particular scenes from Dirty Rotten Scoundrels then you're a better man than I am. Jane Lapotaire is annoying, but Joss Ackland almost manages to counterbalance her badness, though not quite.

It remains a notch above the very worst that the studio released, but it's a close call.

4/10

http://www.amazon.com/Crescendo-James-Olson/dp/B0026RB2J8/ref=sr_1_1?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1373382061&sr=1-1&keywords=crescendo

Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey (1991)

The boys are back, and this time they're going to Hell. The original title of this film was, in fact, originally going to be "Bill & Ted Go To Hell" but, apparently, many Americans are put off by anything that uses the word Hell so that was changed. Thankfully, most of what made the first film so enjoyable was kept the same.

Alex Winter and Keanu Reeves reprise their main roles as, respectively, Bill S. Preston Esq. and Ted Theodore Logan. This time the future is jeopardised by the wicked De Nomolos (Joss Ackland), a man who has had enough of people being excellent to each other and enjoying rock 'n' roll music. He decides to crash the party in spectacular fashion, by using the time-travelling phonebox to send back evil robot versions of the boys, killing the real pair and then ruining their lives and musical career. It's a cunning plan, and one that looks as if it will work when Bill and Ted are killed off pretty quickly. But death doesn't have to be the end.

It may be a new director at the helm in the shape of Peter Hewitt, but writers Chris Matheson and Ed Solomon (whose name is reversed for the name of the villain) are back and clearly out to do their best for two characters embraced so readily by audiences the first time around.

Winter and Reeves slip back into their roles as easily as any of their casual clothing. They have some fun playing the bad robots, but always seem more at ease being the optimistic, naive, good guys. Rufus (played by George Carlin) returns, as do the princesses from the first film, although they are now played by Annette Azcuy and Sarah Trigger and they have slightly more screentime. Great support comes from Amy Stock-Poynton, Chelcie Ross, Pam Grier and many others (including Hal Landon Jr. and Roy Brocksmith, two men who at one point have to bravely attempt to act as if their bodies have been inhabited by the spirits of our leading dudes). But the highlight of the movie is William Sadler, hilariously deadpan - no pun intended - in the role of the Grim Reaper. The film moves along nicely before he appears, but as soon as his character starts to interact with Bill and Ted the whole thing is lifted slightly, putting it on a par with the first film.

People expecting more time travel shenanigans may be slightly disappointed, but the main premise IS based on altering timelines and the finale has some fun with the familiar phonebox. There are lots of great characters, all of them in the shadow of the Grim Reaper (suitably enough, I suppose), and a rousing rock song or two on the soundtrack, including the mighty God Gave Rock 'N' Roll To You. If you enjoyed the first movie then you'll enjoy this movie.

Station!

8/10

 http://www.amazon.co.uk/Bill-Teds-Bogus-Journey-DVD/dp/B00005KIVU/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1370204606&sr=8-1&keywords=bill+and+ted%27s+bogus+journey

Rasputin: The Mad Monk (1966)

Don Sharp directs this hugely entertaining movie based on the script by Anthony Hinds that certainly doesn't aim for historical accuracy, but captures the sheer overpowering charisma and presence of a legendary figure from the past.

The main man is played by Christopher Lee, in a performance positively brimming with electric energy, menace and a lust for life and all its earthly pleasures (to be admitted to in confession). Finding himself unpopular after an incident of self-defence gone awry, despite his healing hands, Rasputin moves from his abbey and looses himself on some fine Russians, manipulating and controlling those who can help him manoeuvre into a position of power. A position that could see him ultimately controlling all of mother Russia from behind the scenes.

Anyone wanting the facts about the extraordinary life of Grigori Rasputin should not be using this movie as any kind of primer. This film is not an account of a reality, by any stretch of the imagination, but it captures the essence of an infamous individual. To roughly phrase a popular saying . . . . "between the truth and the legend, print the legend".

The cast are all great, and familiar to many from Hammer movies and elsewhere. This is Lee's show all the way but we also get very good performances from the likes of Barbara Shelley, Suzan Farmer and Richard Pasco, who stands out as the put-upon Dr. Zargo.

The direction may be unspectacular but that's not really a major concern when the look of the finished movie is so pleasing and the focus remains on the towering presence of Lee, whether he's hypnotising unwitting ladies or dancing some magnificent, frenetic, Russian dancing. It's a bravado performance that picks up the entire movie and carries it over the finish line as a winner.

8/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Rasputin-The-Mad-Monk-Blu-ray/dp/B0085MXQ7Y/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1368516850&sr=8-1&keywords=rasputin+the+mad+monk