Shudder Saturday: Glorious (2022)

I like Ryan Kwanten, the star of Glorious, and responsible for carrying most of the film on his shoulders, but he hasn't really done well with his choice of film projects since the excellent Red Hill many moons ago. I also like Rebekah McKendry, despite the fact that she and David Ian McKendry disappointed me with their Christmas horror anthology All The Creatures Were Stirring. So I was hoping for the best, but also expecting the worst, with Glorious. Kwanten starring, Rebekah McKendry directing, and a script co-written by Joshua Hull, David Ian McKendry, and Todd Rigney. 

No need to try and keep anyone in suspense here. I really enjoyed this. It's a simple, dialogue-focused film that also sneaks in some wonderful visuals, as well as a great vocal performance from J. K. Simmons.

But let's get back to Kwanten for now. He plays Wes, a man who we first see in a state of some distress. He seems to be broken-hearted, but maybe there's something more to it. He heads into a fairly isolated roadside rest stop, just to use the toilet, and then finds that he's unable to leave. He also finds that he's not alone. Someone (J. K. Simmons) claiming to be some kind of god, starts speaking to him from behind a glory hole in the bathroom. It soon becomes clear that Wes will need to make some difficult choices before he can leave the rest stop, which may require him to also face up to some horrible truths.

Although the premise may seem too insubstantial for a feature runtime, Glorious actually works perfectly. It's a familiar concept given an enjoyable new set of clothes to wear, and the main cast complement the smart and amusing script. It is also helped by a number of scenes showing flashbacks/memories that Wes is processing, mainly with his ex-partner (Brenda, played by Sylvia Grace Crim), allowing viewers to escape the confines of the grimy toilet area without REALLY escaping the confines of the grimy toilet area. And McKendry does plenty to keep the film visually interesting, switching between different viewing angles and gradually opening up the environment around the two main characters conversing.

Kwanten does well with his best role in years, likeable, and occasionally dopey, in a way that he performs so easily. I'd say that his casting even manages to underline the entire finale of the film in a way that makes it more effective and brilliantly obvious. Simmons has a great voice, and his delivery of every line here is a treat, starting off as a friendly stranger before quickly turning into a cosmic horror of potentially mind-shattering proportions. Sort of. Crim isn't in too many scenes, but she has a great presence, her winning performance helping her character cast a long shadow over everything.

I don't want to dive into the kind of hyperbole that I much prefer to avoid altogether, but Glorious works as an object lesson on how to make an independent horror movie with fairly limited resources (obviously, having cast members like Kwanten, Simmons, and Crim helps a lot). Have a good enough script, use numerous tricks to make your one main location interesting, and do your best to ensure that the pacing is spot on. And try to convince J. K. Simmons to take on any voice roles. Simple. 

8/10

If you have enjoyed this, or any other, review on the blog then do consider the following ways to show your appreciation. A subscription/follow costs nothing.
It also costs nothing to like/subscribe to the YouTube channel attached to the podcast I am part of - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCErkxBO0xds5qd_rhjFgDmA
Or you may have a couple of quid to throw at me, in Ko-fi form - https://ko-fi.com/kevinmatthews

Prime Time: Flight 7500 (2014)

Directed by Takahi Shimizu, the man who delivered so many great scares in the Ju-On: The Grudge movie series, as well as some other decent films, you could be forgiven for expecting good things from Flight 7500. Those expectations should be drastically lowered when you notice that this is written by Craig Rosenberg, a writer who also delivered The Uninvited (a middling remake of a classic) and The Quiet Ones (which is just terrible). Expectations should then nosedive when you realise that this is based on/inspired by a true story.

A varied bunch of passengers get on a plane, all seated and looked after by Laura Baxter (Leslie Bibb) and Suzy Lee (Jamie Chung). You have a pair of newlyweds, Rick (Jerry Ferrara) and Liz (Nicky Whelan), a moody goth (Scout Taylor-Compton), and Brad (Ryan Kwanten) and Pia (Amy Smart), a couple who have recently broken up, but don't want to ruin a non-refundable holiday for their friends by letting them know. There are others on board, some of them getting a story arc, many of them not, but it's this core group that becomes the focus of the movie.

I hope people don't misunderstand me here when I say that this is genuinely awful. While it is technically decent enough, in terms of the sound work and some general cinematography, it's almost constantly getting enough wrong to ruin any potential scares and/or atmosphere. The geography of the plane, the positioning of characters compared to one another, the confused looks from people as sounds or movements occur just off-camera, it's all very poor. And for a film set on a plane, it rarely feels as if it is actually set on a plane (I am talking about the background noise and little movements that you normally see in plane-set movies, replicating the real experience, they're missing here).

That might not be so bad if the cast was stellar. This is not a stellar cast, and they're sorely mistreated by Rosenberg's weak script. I tend to like Kwanten, but he's rarely managed to get himself movie roles that work well for him (a notable exception being the excellent Red Hill). I tend to dislike Smart, and have rarely seen her in a role that another actress couldn't have done better with, but it's not her fault that this movie decides to give her a few lines of dialogue and then largely act as if she's a background character. Bibb and Chung are treated slightly better, and Whelan is made so smug and lacking in self-awareness that she 's amusing enough, but those are the only people who have some trait that makes them remotely memorable. Even Taylor-Compton, doing standard goth girl schtick, suffers from writing that confuses hair and make-up with actual characterisation.

The ending, which at least comes along soon enough (the runtime is only 80 minutes, approximately), is obviously part of the movie that some felt would make the whole journey worthwhile. It doesn't, and those familiar with the real-life event this is based on may find that it leaves an unpleasant taste. It doesn't justify anything that viewers have just sat through, and it easily ranks as one of the worst horror films from Shimizu, who has so many other greats you can choose from.

2/10

If you have enjoyed this, or any other, review on the blog then do consider the following ways to show your appreciation. A subscription/follow costs nothing.
It also costs nothing to like/subscribe to the YouTube channel attached to the podcast I am part of - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCErkxBO0xds5qd_rhjFgDmA
Or you may have a couple of quid to throw at me, in Ko-fi form - https://ko-fi.com/kevinmatthews

Dead Silence (2007)

After James Wan and Leigh Whannell found fame with Saw, for better or worse, they quickly moved into the territory that would become their more familiar ground over the next decade, the supernatural horror. Dead Silence is a film that is interesting now to watch for a number of reasons, not the least of them being the seeds of ideas that both men would use more effectively in a number of their more successful movies.

Things start with a dummy being delivered to the abode of Jamie And Lisa Ashen. It's not long until Lisa is dead, Jamie is the prime suspect, and a trip home sees him start to uncover a number of clues that point to the evil influence of a famous ventriloquist named Mary Shaw. He is trying to prove his innocence and find out exactly what happened, all the while being closely watched by a detective who clearly believes that it's only a matter of time until Jamie slips up and can be charged with murder.

There's so much here that I enjoy that I find it easy to overlook the things that Dead Silence does poorly. What it lacks in ANY sense of reality, what it fails to do in terms of hiding the minor and major twists, it more than makes up for with huge helpings of creepy atmosphere and a premise that allows plenty of chills to be wrung from that creepy standby, the ventriloquist's dummy. But this is a film that begins with a couple receiving a delivery of one such dummy and not immediately setting it on fire, setting their whole house on fire, and moving to the furthest possible zip code at the other end of the country. And that's not the least believable thing about the film. The production design is wonderful throughout, but turns a small town into nothing more than a succession of sets that wouldn't look out of place in any major Halloween haunt (it's no surprise to find that the film was used at Universal's "Halloween Horror Nights" in the year it was released), none of the characters feel remotely close to being normal human beings, and the finale, as enjoyably scary and effective as it is, is quite preposterous. It also suffers from the kind of editing that many disliked in Saw.

Wan directs competently enough, although he's at the beginning of a steep learning curve that he would easily stand astride within a few years, and he does enough with the pacing and atmosphere to help distract from the silliness. Whannell, on the other hand, can't seem to make headway with the script. He's gone on record with his unhappiness at the experience, and final product, but I'm surprised that he couldn't work his way out from the strong core and create something much better than what we ended up with. Both the exposition and dialogue are weak, although he deserves credit for creating the better scares that help to make things a bit easier for Wan.

Perhaps some stronger leads would have helped. I like Kwanten (although this was a while before I saw his work in True Blood and Red Hill, both allowing him to do much better work) but he's unable to do much with the material here. Donnie Wahlberg is so bad, at times, that he feels as if he's wandered in from an audition for the role of "obsessive and obstinate cop" in some parody. Judith Roberts is wonderfully creepy in the role of Mary Shaw, Bob Gunton and Amber Valletta do well as, respectively, the father and mother-in-law of Kwanten's character, and Laura Regan isn't onscreen for long enough to make a strong impression.

A dangerous dummy, a scary-looking old woman, an entity with a vendetta against individuals that isn't easy to placate and/or get rid of, a cop who may find himself in trouble while trying to keep track of a main suspect, Dead Silence may be viewed as a failure by some but it's an essential stepping stone in the filmographies of both Wan and Whannell. And it's actually a decent little chiller too, if also a bit of a silly one.

6/10

You can buy the movie here.
Americans can get it here.

The Hurricane Heist (2018)

The Hurricane Heist is quite terrible. The characterisations are laughably bad, every scene is overloaded with CGI, and there are moments in which it's very difficult to remember just what the hell is going on, thanks to the choppy editing and fast and loose nature of the screenplay.

Toby Kebbell and Ryan Kwanten play two brothers, Will and Breeze Rutledge, respectively. At the very start of the movie we see the younger versions of their characters in the middle of a super-strong hurricane that kills their father. This has led to Will becoming a meteorologist and Breeze being at a bit of a loss after his time in the military. One of his recent jobs involved working on a generator in a treasury facility that has the task of shredding millions and millions of dollars. When very bad weather causes generator problems, a Treasury agent named Casey (Maggie Grace) calls on Breeze to take him to the facility and help fix things, not realising that while she is out of the picture the place is being taken over by robbers. The weather keeps getting worse, but Casey is with the right people to help her use the conditions to foil the robbers.

Directed by Rob Cohen, who has a few other titles in his filmography in the same vein as this slice of silliness, The Hurricane Heist is the kind of entertainment that you put on when you don't want to think too much. It has spectacle and decent pacing, although anyone after stuff like decent characters, logic, and surprises should look elsewhere.

The script, by Jeff Dixon and Scott Windhauser, is the big weakness. Revelations and character developments are awkwardly shoehorned in between action sequences when the best approach would surely have been to take a bit more time during the opening act to set everyone up before then leaving them to battle robbers and insanely strong wind and rain.

Kebbell and Kwanten may not want to put this film on any highlight reel but at least both know exactly what movie they're in, and they have fun in their roles (with Kebbell involved in a couple of the more enjoyable set-pieces). In fact, everyone at least plays their part well enough, with Grace also doing a decent job as the agent facing overwhelming odds as she tries to foil the robbery, and Ralph Ineson as another agent mixed up in the whole mess. Nobody else really makes much of an impression but that doesn't really matter, as they're mostly there to be a threat to our leads while the hurricane continues to build and build into an even bigger threat.

Not the worst film of last year, not by a long shot, but enjoying this movie is only possible if you know exactly what you're letting yourself in for. It's definitely not as good as it could be, and the first few set-pieces show how good it could have been (I was impressed by both the car chase sequence and the later moments showing Kebbell using the strong wind to his advantage as he threw stuff around a corner to be blown into the baddies), but it's an easy, disposable, watch.

6/10

You can buy the movie here.
Americans can buy it here.

April Fools: Knights Of Badassdom (2013)

When I first saw the trailer for Knights Of Badassdom I knew that I was going to love it. Well, I felt very strongly that I was going to love it. It had a great cast and a premise that I thought couldn't fail. Unfortunately, the film was held back for a long, long time before finally being released, after a great deal of studio interference, apparently. It would be nice to see the original movie that director Joe Lynch intended people to see, but it's hard to think of any improvements that would turn this into something truly great. As it stands, it's massively disappointing, mainly because of how it fails to fully exploit the brilliant central idea.

Steve Zahn and Peter Dinklage play a couple of guys who enjoy a bit of LARP (Live Action Role Playing) now and again. They drag their buddy (Ryan Kwanten) along to a big event, in order to cheer him up after he was unceremoniously ditched by his girlfriend, and start to play. Unfortunately, one of the props being used for the game is a bit too real, and one of the main character unwittingly summons a demon that quickly starts preying on the helpless LARPers all around.

What do you think? Sounds fantastic, right? It really does, and it was that central concept that had me salivating for a long time, eager for the film to get any kind of release that would allow me to at least see the damn thing. Well, maybe Joe Lynch has some super-duper extended cut that rejigs everything and magically turns the movie into what many people hoped it would be, but I'm not holding my breath.

The main problem seems to lie with the screenplay by Matt Wall and Kevin Dreyfuss. It just doesn't pack in enough mirth, doesn't throw enough gore in to compensate, and spends far too little time with the best characters, played by Zahn and Dinklage (both on fine form). Kwanten is someone I like, but he's not treated well here. I spent many of his scenes just wishing that his character had been wiped from the movie, he was simply unnecessary and uninteresting. Summer Glau brightens things up slightly by being Summer Glau, and Jimmi Simpson is pretty hilarious for almost every moment that he's onscreen, but there's still not enough to raise this to the level of something even average.

The direction from Lynch seems to add to the mishandling of the material, but maybe I'm being unfair. Maybe all of my problems with the movie DO reflect on the studio interference more than the potential that the movie had to be something great, but we can always only ultimately critique whatever we have available to us, and this IS Knights Of Badassdom. For the time being, at least. And, in this incarnation of the movie, Lynch seems happy to go along with the undercooked helpings served up by Wall and Dreyfuss, before using the finale to turn off anyone who has watched all the way through and tried to convince themselves that it was worth the wait.

Not badass. Just bad.

4/10

http://www.amazon.com/Knights-Badassdom-Blu-ray-Peter-Dinklage/dp/B00HOGRJQG/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1392233506&sr=8-1&keywords=knights+of+badassdom