Mubi Monday: Lars And The Real Girl (2007)

Wow. Just . . . wow.

It's a good job that I already like most of the people involved in Lars And The Real Girl, on both sides of the camera, because seeing this first would have been enough to put me off everyone involved for a long time. I know some people like this, apparently, but it was a bewildering and painful viewing experience for me.

Ryan Gosling plays Lars, a painfully shy and lonely man who lives in the garage of the family home now co-owned by himself and his brother, Gus (Paul Schneider). Gus is living in the house with his pregnant partner, Karin (Emily Mortimer). They keep trying to welcome Lars into the home, but he resists their attempts to offer him their company. Things take a strange turn when Lars orders a sex doll off the internet, introduces her to Gus and Karin, and starts to spend his time with the doll as if the two are a couple in a serious relationship. A local doctor (played by Patricia Clarkson) doesn't see any harm in the situation, and everyone in the local area decides to go along with the delusion. Because Lars is a very nice man, apparently, and pretending his sex doll girlfriend is a real person isn't a major hardship.

Written by Nancy Oliver, who has some great TV work to her credit, this is a big swing that simply doesn't work. It's a car crash in slow motion, although every cast member does well with what's asked of them. I know how we're supposed to view the whole thing as it plays out (quirky and sad becomes heartwarming and incisive), but it doesn't work for two main reasons. One, Lars is now the kind of repressed and lonely male that we now all too often view as a ticking timebomb. Two, everyone goes along with the situation far too easily. In fact, Gus is the only one who seems fully appalled by the whole thing, initially anyway. And as everyone became more comfortable with treating the doll as an independent human being I became more exhausted with the preposterousness of the whole thing.

Director Craig Gillespie can do offbeat films, as we've seen so often throughout his career, but this early effort from him feels like a potentially good idea ruined by everyone having far too much faith in the screenplay. Having just one or two people supporting Lars could have made things interesting enough as he battled against others and was forced to work harder to create his own level of normalcy that would help him work through whatever was affecting his mental health.

Gosling is very good in the lead role, unsurprisingly. In fact, his presence is the only thing that stops you from assuming that Lars is also creating a long list of targets while stockpiling guns and ammo in the garage area that he calls home. Schneider is a lot better here than he has been in many other roles, perhaps helped to raise his game by the ever-wonderful Mortimer. Despite having to keep a straight face in some of the most ridiculous scenes, Clarkson also delivers the kind of greatness that she always delivers, and there's a sweet and fun supporting turn from Kelli Garner as an actual real human woman who seems to like Lars, despite the many layers keeping him at a distance from reality.

You can find a lot of praise for this elsewhere. And you might end up agreeing with all of that praise. I wasn't won over though. The cast do their best, but, and apologies for not coming up with a less crude analogy, a turd with shiny gems scattered over it is still a turd.

4/10

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The Family Stone (2005)

I am not sure whether it is the streaming effect or whether people genuinely hold this film in high esteem, but 2023 was the year that I finally couldn’t seem to avoid seeing The Family Stone mentioned as a standard Christmas movie favourite for many people. So I figured I should see what all the fuss is about. I am still none the wiser, despite some good moments here and there that either deliver chuckles or tug on the heart-strings. 

Dermot Mulroney plays Everett, a young man who decides to take his girlfriend along to the usual family Christmas. The problem is that his girlfriend, Meredith (Sarah Jessica Parker), seems a bit uptight and prone to confuse herself while stressed. This amuses some of the family, but also eventually causes them to become upset as Meredith appears to display some horrible bigotry. Things get messier and messier, not helped by Everett’s brother, Ben (Luke Wilson), taking a shine to Meredith while her sister, Julie (Claire Danes), proves to be quite a surprise distraction for Everett.

Written and directed by Thomas Bezucha, The Family Stone has plenty of snow, a number of Christmas traditions, and a final scene that underlines the good intentions it was aiming for. Unfortunately, it also has a bunch of people who seem quite horrible, either unprompted or due to the escalating circumstances they’re caught up in, and it’s hard to find anyone to fully care about. I am not sure that I wanted anyone here to have a happy ending, and the tone fails to get the balance of sweet and sour right.

The cast aren’t bad, and they all do what they can to elevate the material they have to work with. Diane Keaton and Craig T. Nelson are absolute highlights, the mother and father trying to maintain order as things start to slip further and further out of control. Parker can do uptight and stressed very well, and she manages to become more likable when she finally gets a chance to relax as she continues to struggle with her own awkwardness. Mulroney and Wilson feel well-suited to their respective roles, Danes shines in a way that will have many viewers questioning why she never got enough huge movie roles, Rachel McAdams is irritatingly bratty, and there are fleetingly worthwhile moments for Tyrone Giordano, Brian White, Elizabeth Reaser, and Paul Schneider.

I cannot say I disliked this, the cast alone kept it watchable and more entertaining than it otherwise would have been, but I also cannot say that I actually liked it. The whole thing has a mean spirit that doesn’t feel counter-balanced by enough festive cheer, and it’s strange to watch such an ensemble cast of characters that only have a few people you hope have a relatively happy ending.

I already know that many people feel different to me on this one. I hope there are maybe some others who agree with me though, if only to make me feel less like I am taking crazy pills for being so disappointed with it.

5/10

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The Assassination Of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford (2007)

A rare, but enjoyable, occasion when a film is rendered fairly impossible to spoil by the title, The Assassination Of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford is also a film that I find it fairly impossible to view as nothing short of a near-masterpiece.

Based on the novel by Ron Hansen, it is, boiling it down to the most basic components, exactly what it says it is. It's also so much more though, starting with a look at who Jesse James (Brad Pitt) really was, a man who sometimes enjoyed his reputation and sometimes had it tightening around his neck like a noose, and then showing the things that would fall into place to lead to that fateful moment that gave Robert Ford (Casey Affleck) his moment of fame.

Adapted into screenplay form by director Andrew Dominik, a man who has been drawn throughout his career to the idea of criminals buying into/creating their own hype and the knife edge of fame and infamy, this is a film with a few people delivering some of their very best work, and that includes Roger Deakins, a man with no shortage of great cinema moments to throw into contention for the best ever. Even by his own high standards, Deakins delivers something here that has a perfect blend of grit and beauty.

When it comes to the cast, Affleck takes the top honours here. His character is never once likeable, and his presence often creates a sense of unease for those around him. Affleck plays it perfectly, showing us all the man who doesn't want to be seen directly by those he interacts with onscreen. His every attempt to charm backfires, whether it is due to him speaking "out of turn", taking a second too long to pick exactly the kind of smile he wants to offer, or sizing up any company to decide who he wants to side with if things suddenly go South. The next best performance may well come from Paul Schneider, pretty much the exact opposite of Affleck's character. I don't mind Schneider, but have rarely had cause to consider him as a really good actor. He really impressed me here. Other great turns come from names you expect to deliver great turns. Jeremy Renner does well, but both Garet Dillahunt and Sam Rockwell effortlessly remind viewers of why they are so welcome in any project they board. Sam Shepard, Mary-Louise Parker, Pat Healy, and Ted Levine all remind you of how good they can be, and Pitt excels as someone who has enjoyed making himself into a legendary figure he is now trapped by.

There are small mis-steps here and there, with one being a moment of narration that goes out of its way to tell us how Jesse James had a condition that made him blink more often than most people . . . before we see him throughout the movie hardly blinking at all. This seems, and is, a very minor failing, but it just seemed so odd to have had this detail pointed out that is then seemingly forgotten for the rest of the film.

While James is the figure at the centre of everything, however, Dominik takes his time to eventually lead viewers further and further into the mindset of Ford, showing the divide between the romanticised ideas of gunslingers making their mark and the reality of knowing how it felt to take someone else’s life with one pull of a trigger. I won’t say that you ever really warm to Ford, but the journey he goes on shows his brief ascension to “stardom” before heading towards an inevitably miserable and troubled existence. He is a man defined by one act, an act he tries to keep justifying for years, and everyone gets to form their own opinion of him.

It would be rude not to mention the soundtrack, from Nick Cave and Warren Ellis (with Cave also onscreen for one very memorable moment), and the whole feel of the movie is superbly authentic, but it is the visuals and lead performances that will stay in your mind after the end credits have rolled. They are right up there with the very best of the 21st century, and this is a film that deserves the praise it has received over the years since it was first released. You won’t forget viewing this, and I doubt the lengthy runtime will put anyone off from revisiting it when they want to bask in the quality and gorgeousness of it.

10/10

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