Prime Time: Tremors: A Cold Day In Hell (2018)

I used to think that the Tremors franchise was one of the best we ever got. It was consistently enjoyable, even if none of the many sequels (and one prequel) came close to equalling the first movie. This film has made me reconsider that opinion. And I have one more to watch, which I am praying will be a return to form after this chilly mis-step.

Once again written by John Whelpley, who wrote two of the previous three instalments in the series, this continues to make use of the great character of Burt Gummer (Michael Gross). Burt now has a son that he's dealing with (Travis, played by Jamie Kennedy, introduced in the last movie), and the two of them end up in a very cold part of Canada that has become a new and unexpected area for Graboid activity. Plans are made, and traps are built, but things change when it turns out that someone has been infected by a parasite that can only be removed with the help of some materials taken from a live Graboid.

Director Don Michael Paul should be used to things by now, having joined Whelpley in the making of Tremors 5: Bloodlines, but I fear that there were too many obstacles placed between him and making something decent here. There's a definite feeling that the budget was slashed at some point, leaving viewers with a film that needs a better cast of characters to make up for the disappointing Graboid moments.

Gross is as good value here as he has been in any movie in this series, and he's the reason to make some time for this. Kennedy is a bit more annoying than he was the first time around, a consequence of the actor being able to play his character with a bit more ease and familiarity, and the likes of Tanya van Graan and Jamie-Lee Money aren't given enough to work with. Money is particularly ill-served, especially when she has to reveal how her character is connected to the ever-growing family tree of Graboid survivors. Paul du Toit is a "suit", and has an agenda to make him as much of a potential threat as the monsters, but he's also not used well.

The 98-minute runtime feels much longer, the callbacks to the first film aren't clever enough to be cute, and the ending feels as if it was slapped together by someone who ran out of time when it came to the deadline for the final draft of the screenplay to be handed in. I'm going to get to the next film soon enough, but I have my expectations seriously dialled down after this disappointment. 

4/10

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Pinocchio: Unstrung (2026)

Another cinematic entry in what we can all now depressingly call "The Pooh-niverse", a cinematic selection of titles based on properties no longer covered by copyright laws, Pinocchio: Unstrung is, as you may have guess, all about everyone's favourite puppet who just wants to get rid of his strings and be a real boy. That means some life lessons, some misunderstandings, and a fair amount of blood and guts.

Richard Brake is Geppetto, and he somehow decides that his grandson, James (Cameron Bell), needs a new friend. One that will never die, and never leave him. Pinocchio (voiced by Jude Evan Lloyd). Pinocchio has a lot of questions, and is soon causing some accidental deaths . . . before being manipulated into causing some deliberate deaths. It doesn't help that he has a scheming cricket (voiced by Robert Englund) whispering in his ear.

Look, the performances here aren't great, as you might expect from another horror riff on Pinocchio (the little puppet has had a few murderous moments over the years). Brake is good fun in his role, and Englund's voice does a lot to make his character a highlight of the supporting cast, but Bell isn't very good, Jessica Balmer and Jack Art Gray are equally weak as his onscreen friends, and poor Lloyd can't do anything to improve upon the repetitive and inane dialogue that he's supposed to keep delivering during the gory set-pieces. Belinda Fenty isn't bad, playing a dentist who we know won't stay healthy and happy for long after "hurting" young James, and Toni Olabanji and Luca Marandola are decent as bullies, also not expected to stay happy and healthy for very long, but the gap between the good and the bad performances is pretty huge.

Writer-director Rhys Frake-Waterfield isn't the greatest wordsmith. He's also not the greatest director. Fair play to him though, this has some practical effects, puppetry, and stop-motion animation that show a level of care and skill you wouldn't expect from such low-budget schlock. Even the opening and closing credits have some genuinely impressive animation helping them along, which some may say is better than anything in the main body of the film. Despite the reason for films like this existing, Frake-Waterfield and co. have shown a notable improvement in their approach to the material since they started trying to make money from the various IPs they could exploit.

And as for the gore gags, well, they take things to another level. I was trying to enjoy this as it played out, and my mood was lifted by the aforementioned animation and effects, but when the first bit of serious bloodshed happened onscreen I was very pleasantly surprised. Obviously aiming to appeal to those who have had a good selection of extreme gore to entertain them nowadays, Pinocchio: Unstrung takes time to present a number of hilarious and ridiculous injuries and kills. Nothing here is ever close to being believable, but at least everyone involved just decided to shrug and throw around more fake blood, and fake organs, and fake severed body parts. 

I doubt too many people will rush to see this if they aren't already familiar with the other films in this vein from Frake-Waterfield, but I'd tentatively recommend it to anyone who fancies something silly and gory. It's not actually a good film, but it's consistently amusing, sometimes even deliberately so.  

5/10

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Mubi Monday: A Woman's Torment (1977)

If you look up writer-director Roberta Findlay online then you will see her credited as a "noted adult and exploitation cinema filmmaker". That's the first line of her description on IMDb anyway. So it's not very surprising that I haven't reviewed any of her films here before. I don't think I've seen anything else that she's done. Given what she delivers here, I'm not averse to checking out other titles from her directorial career.

Tara Chung plays Karen, the woman who is due to go through some of the torment that the title promises. Karen has some serious mental health issues, which doesn't stop others around her from thinking that she may be willing to get down 'n' dirty with them. And sometimes she is happy to get naked and engage in some special happy happy time, but there's often a point when she'll be pushed to react strongly and violently. Which is a real mood-killer, you can be sure of that.

Making use of familiar moments seen in other psycho-sexual horrors of the 1960s and 1970s, Findlay seems to struggle here when it comes to mixing in the character study moments and the requisite sex scenes. The examination of a fragile and crumbling mental state is perhaps a bit better than expected, although not at all subtle or nuanced (of course), but it's very hard to interrupt that developing storyline with some random sexy time.

It helps that Tara Chung works so well in her main role. Having only acted in a handful of movies, from the information I could find anyway, Chung has the ability to be cute and sexy one minute and frantic and dangerous the next. There are other people with main roles here (Jennifer Jordan, Jake Teague, Jeffrey Hurst, Crystal Sync, etc), but they're very easy to forget as soon as the movie is over. Chung isn't, although that's to do with both her screen presence and the material she has to work with.

Give this to twenty different film-makers and you'd end up with twenty very different films. Findlay knows what she wants to do though, and the end result is interesting for the fact that it's filtered through a '70s sexploitation lens. It's just not wholly satisfying. Things would have been improved if Findlay had committed to one particular direction, be it the sex or the insanity and potential horror. It's paced much like a tame slasher movie, and the very last scenes provide a very interesting, and rare, depiction of a killer overwhelmed by their own emotions, but nothing is helped by the juxtaposition of specific events, nor by the tone of the whole piece.

Interesting, but far from the best example of this kind of thing, whichever way you look at it. 

6/10

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Netflix And Chill: Bird Box: Barcelona (2023)

Considering the fact that I seemed to enjoy Bird Box more than most people, it's a bit odd that it took me a few years to finally get around to this sorta-sequel/spin-off. Bird Box remains one of the best sensory-based monster movies from a time when we had a few of them released in fairly quick succession, but Bird Box: Barcelona proves to be a surprisingly good attempt to revisit that world without simply retreading very familiar ground.

The plot this time around focuses on Sebastián (Mario Casas) and his young daughter, Anna (Alejandra Howard). The world remains a dangerous place, nobody should be stepping outside without some kind of blindfold, and some kind of plan, and those caught unawares by the entities that invaded our planet some time ago are either driven to kill themselves or turned into some kind of loyal "seer". Sebastián soon meets up with some other survivors, and he hopes that he can be the one to guide them through the world, but everyone has a different opinion on the best way forward. And some may not agree on what constitutes a happy end point to their journey.

Co-written and co-directed by Àlex and David Pastor, who have both worked with similar material previously in their shared filmography, Bird Box: Barcelona is a genuinely interesting companion piece to the first film, and it's something that becomes more engrossing and thought-provoking as each scene plays out. Some early developments may make viewers roll their eyes, but things are set up nicely for a tale that more fully explores the choices that people might make in such a life-threatening apocalyptic scenario.

It helps that the leads are great. Casas continues to show why he's become such a popular choice for Spanish film and TV roles over the past couple of decades. He's very easy to keep rooting for, even as his behaviour is reframed quite early on in the proceedings. Howard does well, although is understandably sidelined as Sebastián starts to connect with other characters who may change his main objectives, and both Georgina Campbell and Naila Schuberth do very well as a couple of vulnerable individuals who could greatly benefit from Sebastián's protection. Campbell has quickly become quite the horror genre stalwart, and that's no bad thing.

As much as I liked this, however, it's hard to say for certain whether many others will share my view. I think this is on a par with the first film, but it quickly becomes a very different beast. Whereas that film was a survival horror, boosted by the star power of Sandra Bullock, this is a bold attempt to show a very different perspective. Some will just want another version of the first movie, and those people are likely to hate this. Anyone willing to appreciate some interesting story-telling decisions should respond positively to it. So don't make the same mistake I did. Get it in your eyes ASAP.

8/10

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Shudder Saturday: Infirmary (2026)

This debut feature from Nicholas Pineda, who directed the film, and also co-wrote the screenplay with Katy Krauland (also making a feature debut), Infirmary is a film that makes you think. Unfortunately, it makes you think about how many different ways you can refer to something as truly awful.

Yet another "found footage" movie that doesn't really know how to make the best use of the format, this is a tiresome tale of a new employee (Edward, played by Paul Syre Lee) being shown the ropes by an old hand (Lester, played by Mark Anthony Williams) before finding out that the building he has to spend time in, an old psych hospital, isn't one that abides by the established rules and logic of our everyday world. There are a number of things ready to go bump in the night, including a variety of handy, and creepy, mannequins.

I wanted to spend this review just ranting and raving about everyone involved. Then I decided that didn't seem fair. The cast are just doing what is asked of them, after all. Then I changed my mind again. The cast may just be doing what is asked of them, but they could have made a bit more effort. While I don't believe that anyone here could have saved this from being a waste of your time, Lee is staggeringly awful throughout, which makes it a lot worse when he has to carry so many scenes by commenting on his journeys through the building, or reacting to things around him. Williams isn't much better, although he doesn't have to spend as much time narrating his own step count. Danielle Kennedy plays the other main character, and she does well enough, although there's nothing she can do to stop the third act feeling so tiresomely predictable as things look set to go from bad to worse.

Most of the blame still has to lie with Pineda though, and Krauland. There's nothing here that feels properly thought about and planned out, from the developing minor background details to the reason for the footage we're watching to actually exist. All you have is a horror film made by someone who seems to have thought "I know a location we can use to make something cheap".

Everyone knows the risks of found footage horror movies nowadays. There have been too many duds. "Fool me once, shame on you, but fool me multiple times and that just shows how ridiculously optimistic I remain when I see a found footage horror movie promoted with a hint of praise from other horror movie fans". Infirmary has a great setting, but even that major positive isn't used well. I genuinely believe that almost anyone else could have made use of what's onscreen here to make something much better. Pineda will probably get an undeserved boost from this. I won't be quick to see whatever he does next, and I doubt many will strongly disagree with me on this squandered opportunity.

2/10

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Soulm8te (2026)

On the one hand, I'm already a bit fed up of AI-infused tech thrillers. On the other hand, I'll keep sitting through them as long as they keep making them. Especially when they're as silly and entertaining as Soulm8te. Or I should say . . . especially when they're as silly and entertaining as the third act of Soulm8te. The rest of the film is a disappointing slog, but there are some gleefully sadistic moments near the end that almost make it worth your time. Almost.

The plot could be written on a grain of rice. David (David Rysdahl) ends up testing a prototype of a Soulm8te (Lily Sullivan). Things seem good, but there are glitches in the system. And one of those glitches is some serious jealousy.

Sullivan isn't bad in her role here, pitching her performance nicely between moments of complete roboticism and moments of extreme emotions. She also looks the part, which is necessary for the developing relationship, and certainly sells viewers on the idea that she would be much better company than a chatty Alexa device. Rysdahl is the lesser of the leads, especially as he has to overlook the early warning signs that turn into massive red flags by halfway point. Claudia Doumit is a welcome presence, playing a young woman named Audrey who may inadvertently position herself as competition to be dealt with by robo-lady, and Arty Froushan is a typical tech boss, which makes it all the more satisfying when he gets stuck in a very sticky situation.

Co-written and directed by Kate Dolan, who helmed the excellent You Are Not My Mother a few years ago, this isn't interested in being too sophisticated or heavy on the commentary. It's a psycho-killer movie, with the psycho just happening to be an AI-enhanced fem-bot. The screenplay, co-written by Rafael Jordan, livens up in the moments that have men being pained and killed in majorly traumatic ways (including two separate incidents of serious penile trauma) before sleepwalking through the rest of the runtime. It's like watching a fun home gadget that puts on a show twice a day, with everything settling down to normality and stillness immediately after each display.

The biggest shame is that nobody seems confident enough to lean in to what should have been campy and over the top ridiculousness. This should have been a bloody and violent slice of fun that felt in line with M3GAN 2.0, but I suspect that the relatively disappointing box office performance of that film had producers here desperately trying to course-correct, which subsequently left us with something toothless, light on bloodshed, and, worst of all, lacking any commitment to the fun factor that's clearly running just underneath every main scene.

5/10

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Psycho Killer (2026)

Writer Andrew Kevin Walker has given us a wide variety of movies throughout his career. But he also wrote Seven. Which, rightly or wrongly, creates a certain expectation in people when he decides to write once more about a serial killer. Psycho Killer is also titled to let people know what it is, but it's an otherwise very different beast in comparison to Walker's best screenplay.

Georgina Campbell plays Jane Archer, a cop who starts obsessively tracking the titular killer (James Preston Rogers) after her husband, who was also a cop, becomes his latest victim. The killer seems to be connected to another notorious figure from the past, but nobody is willing to believe the theory that Archer is working on. 

The feature directorial debut of Gavin Polone, Psycho Killer is moderately fun and entertaining, if you go into it knowing that it's absolutely preposterous. It's a comic book version of a rampaging serial killer, and some of the poor continuity in early scenes should clarify that Polone and Walker are more interested in being bloody and amusing than gritty and serious. This psycho killer is the ROTLD Suicide of psycho killers, and very quick to ensure that people know how committed he is. "You think this is a fucking costume? This is a way of life."

Campbell is very good in her lead role, arguably much better than the movie deserves. She's the one person allowed to have some emotion, but she's also believably capable and determined while keeping her prey in sight. Rogers brings an impressive physicality to his role, at times aligning him with unstoppable horror movie icons like Jason Voorhees or Michael Myers. Malcolm McDowell is a lot of fun as the kind of Satanist really just interested in something that affords him the opportunity to enjoy some drug-fuelled hedonism, Logan Miller is a much more devoted acolyte, and many others appear onscreen just long enough to be added to the impressive bodycount being racked up by the killer.

Perhaps it helped that I finally got around to seeing this after hearing a wide variety of views on it already, or perhaps I was just much more willing to suspend my disbelief, but I was happy enough to go along with this all the way up to a final sequence that was as audacious and fun as anything else in the movie. I can imagine many rolling their eyes at it, but I actually enjoyed the reveal of the killer's grand plan.

Would I recommend this to others? Not really. I wouldn't dismiss it as unwatchable trash either though. It IS trashy, in a good way, but it's also made with at least a semblance of wit and intelligence running through it. That may ultimately be outweighed by the sillier elements, but at least it tries to do something a bit different with a handful of familiar tropes.

6/10

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Prime Time: Shelby Oaks (2025)

Some people really enjoyed this movie, and I myself have somehow watched it three times already, but I am not a big fan. Starting off seeming like one thing, format-wise, before turning into something very different, and highly derivative, Shelby Oaks is one of the weaker slick horror movies I have seen throughout the past year.

Camille Sullivan plays Mia, a woman who is obsessed with finding out what happened to her missing sister, Riley (Sarah Durn). Riley was part of a group of YouTube paranormal investigators, which made me care very little about her fate anyway (but that's just me), and the easily-solved mysterious circumstances of their disappearance seem to lead Mia, as the title suggests, to Shelby Oaks.

Another person who made their initial connection to audiences via YouTube, director Chris Stuckmann (who also co-wrote the screenplay with his wife, Samantha Elizabeth) positions himself here as a prime example of why we shouldn't necessarily be expecting great things from everyone who has grown up with that platform and advanced level of tech-savviness. Shelby Oaks isn't an incompetent film, not by a long shot, but it's so tiresomely unoriginal and simplistic that it highlights what happens when you have someone wanting to blend their many influences without being able to add enough creative spark to the mix.

Sullivan does a good job in her role, thankfully (considering how much of the film remains very focused on her), but nobody else gets to make a strong impression. Brendan Sexton III is "the husband", and that's the sum total of his character, Charlie Talbert plays obvious pawn in the ongoing chess game between our main character and whatever she is due to encounter, Keith David appears in a role that does little more than allow horror movie fans to say "yes, Keith David", and Robin Bartlett plays someone who feels as if they've wandered in from a Resident Evil storyline. Durn doesn't get enough good stuff to sink her teeth into, sadly, and that's a real shame. Taking us on the journey alongside her would have been better than constructing a narrative that has to spend far too much time trying to ensure that viewers don't notice the blindingly obvious clues laid out like a set of super-sized arrows pointing in one direction.

I started this review by mentioning that I have watched this three times already. There won't be a fourth, unless someone forces me into a rewatch for some godforsaken reason.  The reason I had to watch this multiple times is simply because I kept forgetting to write up a review for it and there was not enough here that managed to stick in my memory. At all. Even the final moment, which is clearly something that Stuckmann and Elizabeth were very pleased with.

I don't want to end on a negative though, especially after reading what Stuckmann has said about his changing approach to film criticism now that he's been able to get more insights into productions and what can go into making any feature. It's admirable that he's put his money where his mouth is, as it were, and it's more than I would manage. There's enough here to show potential, especially considering the fairly low budget, and I think Stuckmann could do much better helming something that was written by someone else. Something a bit more inventive and able to better blend familiar horror genre moments. 

4/10

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Faces Of Death (2026)

I'm absolutely sure that my reaction was in line with most other horror movie fans when I heard that someone was "remaking" Faces Of Death. Why? That title, as notorious as it is, now feels like a laughable and rightly-forgotten relic of a bygone age. While it used to have a certain value to it, in terms of it being a shorthand connection for those who sought out the kind of titles that were hard to find in the video nasty era, it has now been greatly overshadowed by photos and footage that can be found with just one or two key strokes on any device connected to the internet. But that's what works about this interestingly meta reworking of the concept.

Barbie Ferreira plays Margot, a young woman who works as a content moderator. She's also had her own moment of viral infamy, a tragic incident caught on camera that makes her less inclined to venture out to places where others may recognise her. Things become very serious for Margot when she discovers one or two clips that she suspects may actually be footage of real murders, overlaid with audio from the old Faces Of Death. Is someone trying to create a modern version of those clips, or is it all just as fake as so many other staged internet footage?

With such consideration given to what is real and what is fake, the performances here need to be as strong as possible. Sadly, they're not. I'm not sure I have seen Ferreira in too many other roles, but she's a disappointing choice for the lead role here. While she exudes a sense of unhappiness and mental fatigue, there's nothing else to her performance. She never quite convinces when trying to display real fear or remorse, or any of the few other emotions she's asked to perform. Dacre Montgomery is asked to play a villain with no real depth or character, but I was suitably impressed by his performance when I finally figured out that I'd last seen him in the very different guise of Billy Hargrove in Stranger Things. Aaron Holliday is a friend to the main character, Charli XCX has brief moments of being antagonistic, and Josie Totah is a stereotypical influencer, so obsessed with her online life that she pauses to reconsider things when she is scared after being kidnapped and held captive, but informed by her captor of the amount of attention and likes being garnered by the situation.

Directed by Daniel Goldhaber, who also co-wrote the screenplay with long-time collaborator Isa Mazzei, Faces Of Death is relevant, yet also already slightly outdated already (thanks AI). There are ideas here that are interesting and worthy of exploration, but they end up being cast aside in a third act that has to deliver more of standard movie moments. Early scenes will work best on people who have had a photo flagged because there may have been some hint of a nipple visible, but have then found themselves unable to report something violent and/or graphic and bloody on the same platform. It's an obvious double standard, one that is often replicated in censorship in so many other areas. Later scenes will work best on people who can be entertained by something that becomes increasingly implausible with each passing minute. I appreciated the unpleasant and dangerous tone that was created at times, but that completely dissipated by the time the end credits came around.

6/10

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Mubi Monday: Daughters Of Darkness (1971)

A celebrated Euro-horror that leans more into the Euro than the horror, Daughters Of Darkness is a film best explored through the lens of people much more knowledgeable and passionate about it than myself (e.g. check out anything that Kat Ellinger has to say about it). I've always found enough here to enjoy, but it's a very slight and ethereal film, one that feels almost as much about the time it was made as about the characters at the heart of it.

John Karlen and Danielle Ouimet are newlyweds Stefan and Valerie. They're supposed to be heading to meet Stefan's mother, but Stefan is actually trying to delay that encounter. Instead, the pair end up checking in to a hotel in Belgium, where they are soon also joined by a countess (Elizabeth, played by Delphine Seyrig) and her "assistant" (Ilona, played by Andrea Rau). The two couples start to interact in ways that are both exciting and dangerous, observed by an anxious hotel clerk (Paul Esser).

Presented in a number of sequences that feel like assembled painterly compositions, Daughters Of Darkness is a vampire film, but it's also much more concerned with looking at unbalanced relationship dynamics, sexual freedom, and self-exploration than fangs and bloodshed. You do get some interesting twists on classic vampire tropes (especially in one shower scene that ends badly for someone), but those expecting something traditional may be disappointed. This sits almost equidistant from both the Hammer horrors of this time and the toothy eroticism of Jean Rollin.

Director Harry Kümel, who also co-wrote the screenplay with Pierre Drouot, Jean Ferry, and one or two others assisting, doesn't have the biggest filmography, but this film alone has been enough to maintain his reputation for over fifty years now. It's mysterious without being too impenetrable, slow-paced without being boring, and gorgeous without being all style over substance. While I have yet to full embrace it as some others do, it's something I find myself drawn back to once every few years, the film itself seeming to emulate the powerful mesmerism and allure of Elizabeth.

For as well as Kümel does, (and it's also worth praising cinematographer Eduard van der Enden, as well as everyone involved in the set dressing, makeup, and costume departments, at the very least) he has a lot to be grateful for when it comes to the casting. Seyrig and Rau are an iconic duo, and both are captivating in very different ways. It's easy to see why the young newlyweds are drawn to them. It's also easy to see how Stefan and Valeria can be so easily exploited and manipulated. Karlen and Ouimet have the lesser roles, but both are fine with what they're asked to do, and that works out well when Ouimet appears to remain passive as she finds herself heading to a very important crunch point in her relationships, with others around her and with herself. Esser is enjoyable in his small role, Georges Jamin is a retired policeman who may spell trouble, and the wonderfully out-of-time hotel itself is another important character.

I can only apologise to others who will view my opinion of this as something approaching blasphemy, but I am simply putting this review and rating here as a starting point. This won't be the last time that I view this film, and future viewings will also be accompanied by deeper explorations that should only serve to enrich the experience for me. And then, one day, I may well see this as the absolute classic that others see.

7/10

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Netflix And Chill: AfrAId (2024)

It's ironic that many of the techno-thrillers showing people being threatened by dangerous AI are made nowadays by studios who seem to be selling us on the inevitability and usefulness of AI. It may be inevitable, and there are times when it can be useful, but we're already heading too fast down a dark tunnel that doesn't have enough safeguards to stop people from crashing into a spike-covered wall hidden somewhere at the end of it.

In order to secure a lucrative business contract, a family is asked to spend some time testing a new home tech device, AIA. AIA is your standard super-charged Alexa/Siri device, able to entertain and educate the kids, order good shopping deals, and generally make life a bit easier. It can also create deepfakes, monitor all communication, and start to act autonomously in ways that seem just a bit psychopathic. That's when mum and dad (Katherine Waterston and John Cho, respectively) start trying to find a way to keep their family (Iris, played by Lukita Maxwell, Preston, played by Wyatt Lindner, and Cal, played by Isaac Bae) safe. It's very hard to find a safe space away from AIA though.

Written and directed by Chris Weitz, who has done much better work in other genres throughout the past quarter of a century, AfrAId is another film from the past few years that already feels somehow ridiculous and paranoid and outdated and naive all at the same time. Dressing things up with overt genre trappings would be fine if the end result was fun and worth your time, but it's not, which makes me wish we spent more time being shown the smaller and more subtle ways in which AI could cause problems, including the erosion of free-thinking and intelligence that stems from being minds being trained to rely on tech and trust it for answers and various tasks.

Cho does well in his lead role, even as things get more ridiculous on the way to the very last scene, but Waterston remains someone I can take or leave in most of her movie roles (and this is one I would have liked to see someone else take on). I really like Maxwell, who at least gets a lot more to do here than in her minor Backrooms role, Bae is very good, and Lindner, well, he does what his asked of him, if nothing more. David Dastmalchian and Ashley Romans have fun for their few minutes of screentime, Havana Rose Liu gets to play two parts (being a real person, Melody, and also the chosen voice for AIA), and does well with both, and Bennett Curran is easy to hate as the whining and sleazy Sawyer,  a young man trying to manipulate Iris into sending him some nudes.

There's zero tension throughout this, especially in a ridiculous third act that limps from one unbelievable moment to the next, and it doesn't lean into the ridiculousness of the concept in order to at least deliver some enjoyable set-pieces. It's a bloodless, toothless, pointless waste of time. 

3/10

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Shudder Saturday: Above The Knee (2024)

Amir (Freddy Singh) has Body Integrity Dysphoria, and that's the main character we're stuck alongside for the duration of Above The Knee. In this case, Amir is obsessed with the idea that his left leg shouldn't be there, from the knee down anyway. He actually tries to sit with it tucked under his body a lot, and gets some pleasure and satisfaction from the times when it feels slightly paralysed. It really needs to go though, but how will others view him if they know that he plans to "solve the problem" himself?

Based on an idea created by Singh and director Viljar Bøe, Above The Knee is a dark and intriguing exploration of a very unusual psyche. I don't think I would have been able to stick with it if it had only given us Amir as an important character, but the fact that we also see how things affect his partner (Kim, played by Julie Abrahamsen), and how one other individual (Rikke, played by Louise Waage Anda) seems to flirt with the central concept without wanting to commit to it, really helps the whole thing to take viewers down some other dark alleyways without losing sight of the main road stretching through the runtime.

Singh plays his part with very little energy, but it's a performance that feels deliberate, and very much in line with his character. He's miserable, he's just killing time until something can happen to completely alter his life, and he won't feel like a complete person until, ironically, his body is as incomplete as he believes it should be. Abrahamsen has the least rewarding role, but the wild nature of the problems at the heart of their relationship help to keep viewing her as sympathetic and sorely ill-treated. In fact, the final scenes are more impactful than expected due to her involvement. Then we have Aanda, giving a great performance as the most fascinating character in the film. She is, to pick a movie analogy, very similar to the character of Marla in Fight Club AKA a tourist who makes another tourist uncomfortable by being so obvious in her attitude. The very best scene in the film has Amir and Rikke testing one another in regards to their ultimate goals.

Bøe may not do much to bring attention to his direction, but the structure of the screenplay and a number of inserted images work to keep viewers interested and curious about how everything will play out. We know what Amir wants. We know how society would view his behaviour. Will he be able to execute his plan, and, if he does, what will he face in the immediate aftermath?

Not a traditional horror movie, and probably not for those looking to fill their viewing schedule this month with easygoing October thrills and chills, but this is an excellent little film that starts from a very dark place and somehow keeps finding ways to get darker and darker all the way up to the incredible last moments.  

8/10

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Hungry (2026)

While the tagline says "this hippo isn't playing games", which should at least let you know that Hungry is a film about a killer hippo, this isn't a film stuck firmly within that one idea. Let's face it, it would be hard to make a horror movie with someone caught in the middle of a quartet of hippos all trying to eat as many snacks as possible before a timer runs out. What you get instead is a decent creature feature that tries to sell itself on a cute name and tagline. And that was enough to get me to watch it.

As per every successful creature feature, and it's a similar template already put in place by disaster movies from decades ago, viewers are introduced to a selection of characters who will all soon end up in jeopardy as they enjoy a riverboat tour in New Orleans. The main two, the potential leads, seem to be friends Sistine (Madison Davenport) and Hannah (Olivia Bernstone), but there's also a multi-generational family group, a busy businesswoman, and the tour guide himself to become endangered when they all inadvertently place themselves in the hunting ground of a hungry hungry hippo.

Written and directed by James Nunn, a man who started his feature career well with Tower Block, but has more recently given us the absolute awfulness of Wildcat, Hungry is a relatively fun and enjoyable slice of nonsense. There could have been a better mix of characters, and more time spent showcasing the practical effects ahead of any computer FX would have been appreciated, but there's enough here to make it exactly what you expect it to be, even down to the grizzled hunter character played entertainingly by Joaquim de Almeida.

Davenport and Bernstone are likeable in their roles, Tracey Bonner has to be less likeable as the woman who apparently causes the tour to be so far away from the usual safe waters, but she does well, and Jim Meskiman, Samantha Coughlan, and River Codack provide a good mix of family members who will suffer greater shock if one of their group is put in hippo-critical condition. Michel Curiel gets to play his guide character as someone pleased to receive some extra money, but not looking to deliberately screw anyone over, and de Almeida does well to avoid going into full on "Ahab/Quint" mode.

Nunn knows what he's doing when it comes to building up the tension, in terms of the creature activity that occurs before the main characters become fully aware of their situation anyway, but there comes a time when everything suddenly becomes much more volatile and dangerous, and that's when he falters slightly. There just isn't enough inventiveness, perhaps due to the fact that a hippo (although a very dangerous mammal) isn't easy to portray as cunning and deadly. It doesn't help that the finale is bogged down by exposition that could have been hinted at much earlier in the film, and the predictable one on one "showdown" is disappointingly anti-climactic.

If you're after some easy entertainment then this should fit the bill. I doubt we'll see a sharp rise in killer hippo movies after this one. It's much more fun to spend time with killer crocs, large alligators, or deadly sharks . . . when it comes to these kinds of films anyway. 

6/10

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Meatcleaver Massacre (1976)

While I wasn't initially aware of Ed Wood being involved in this (apparently taking over the directing duties and credited with an alias), the staggering ineptitude of Meatcleaver Massacre soon gave me a clue to their involvement. Not that I am a hater of Wood. Indeed, many of their clumsy failures have a charm lacking from a selection of more polished mainstream productions I could name, but it would be disingenuous to try and hail Wood as some kind of misunderstood great. An important part of cinema history, yes. A misunderstood genius, I think not.

Meatcleaver Massacre contains neither a meatcleaver nor a massacre, as far as I could tell anyway (it's not the sharpest picture quality I've ever seen). It instead contains a messy and tame horror film that in no way lives up to the promise of the title. There's also some footage of Christopher Lee bookending the film (and I encourage you all to investigate how that happened to end up there) with some dialogue that attempts to add some weight to the nonsense you're about to watch. The silly plot has Professor Cantrell (James Habif) left paraplegic and comatose after a group of abusive thugs break into his home and kill his family. That doesn't mean that Cantrell is powerless though. His years of studying the occult mean that he can still find a way to get revenge on the criminals.

Keith Burns and Ray Atherton are the two people credited with writing this, but it's not something that most people would put on their C.V. The dialogue is dire, there's no tension, and most of the characters blend into one another. There's the Professor, there's the detective investigating the situation (played by J. Arthur Craig), and there are the corpses-to-be.

If the writing and direction are poor, the acting generally matches them. There's nobody here (Lee aside) who you could imagine one day making their way through some big award campaign. I've seen a hell of a lot worse though, especially while sitting through many SOV and/or microbudget horror movies. Larry Justin plays the ringleader of the reprobates, and isn't actually terrible. He just cannot do anything with the material to make it better. 

There's not much else to say about this. It runs for 85 minutes, but viewers spend 8 of those minutes being spoken to by Christopher Lee, and there are no depths to explore and examine. The fact that it has been given a limited release on Blu-ray by a couple of different companies (Shout! Factory in the USA, 101 Films here in the UK), while I still eagerly await a collector's edition release of Screamtime, is just downright perverse.

2/10

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Prime Time: The Love Hypothesis (2026)

When I started watching The Love Hypothesis I was unaware of the fact that it was based on a story that started life as Star Wars fan fiction. All I knew about it was that it was a rom-com, it was directed by Claire Scanlon (who also helmed the enjoyable rom-com Set It Up), and it starred two people in lead roles that I wasn't very familiar with.

Lili Reinhart plays Olive Smith, a very smart student with a very bright future. She doesn't have anyone really close to her though, which is why her relationship with uni bestie Anh (Rachel Marsh) is so important. More important than her crush on Jeremy (Nicholas Duvernay). When she realises that Jeremy actually has a crush on Anh, but knows that Anh won't pursue it if she thinks that Olive will have her feelings hurt, there's only one solution . . . pretend to be in a relationship. Events conspire to push Olive and the notoriously mean Dr. Adam Carlsen (Tom Bateman) together, which could work out well for both of them, as Dr. Carlsen needs to show how settled he is in order to be rewarded with some vital grant money. The pretence has rewards, but it isn't without risks, including the development of some real feelings.

Once you know what (or who) Ali Hazelwood was writing about then The Love Hypothesis becomes amusingly obvious in how the leads are characterised, but Sarah Rothschild does good work in crafting a screenplay that keeps everything moving quickly from one satisfying rom-com moment to the next. There's a couple of "meet cute" scenes that work well, plenty of fun to be had with the initial awkwardness between our stars, and a believable development in the strength of the connection between them. Lessons are learned, obstacles are put in their way, and you will know how it is going to end as soon as it starts. But that's part of the appeal. If I don't want a formulaic movie then I will look elsewhere, but if I seek out a new rom-com then, dammit, I want enough rom and enough com, and director Scanlon delivers on both fronts here.

Reinhart does well in her role, and she's good enough to warrant top billing. Bateman also does well, and he provides a lot of the comedy with his stern and analytical approach to most interactions. Marsh is the kind of best friend that everyone wishes they could have in their lives, Duvernay does perfectly fine with what is asked of him, although that's not too much, and Jaboukie Young-White is more enjoyable when he's partying and neglecting his studies than when he has to face any consequences for partying and neglecting his studies. Arty Froushan is a very important secondary character, Dr. Thomas Benton, but the plot thread concerning Olive's research, and attempts to impress the likes of Benton and his peers, feels slightly undercooked until it becomes pivotal to the third act.

I'm not going to rush to recommend this to everyone, but you could do a lot worse if you're after some fluffy and (mostly) sweet fun. The more adult moments that are presented in the third act may put you off slightly, but it's all handled in just the right way by Scanlon, who allows her characters to maintain a vulnerability and/or defensiveness that, while part and parcel of the sub-genre, will be very familiar to those who have tiptoed through the early stages of any major relationship. 

And, hey, at least it didn't stick close enough to the source material to have our protagonists presented as two Death Star-crossed lovers. 

6/10

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Spa Weekend (2026)

Much like any other films aimed at certain demographics, comedies aimed at female viewers can't just rely on goodwill from those who end up watching them. We've made enough progress now that audiences can expect more than just the bare minimum. Spa Weekend isn't just the bare minimum. It doesn't reach that high.

Leslie Mann, Michelle Buteau, and Anna Faris are the busy and stressed friends who head for the titular planned relaxation. Unfortunately, they're soon joined by the one friend (Isla Fisher) who always seems to turn things completely chaotic. Inevitably, things soon turn chaotic, putting stress on the bonds of friendship and a lot of stress on the staff of the spa resort. 

Co-written and co-directed by Jon Lucas and Scott Moore, a duo who have given us much more enjoyable comedies throughout the past two decades, Spa Weekend is a painful waste of talent, both behind and in front of the camera. I wouldn't mind if it felt like a film that just didn't work for me, but it's a film that I can't imagine working for anyone. While comedy is highly subjective, of course, there aren't any big laughs here, aside from maybe one or two moments used in the trailer, and the character played by Isla Fisher is made so annoying that she unbalances what should be a very standard and satisfying third act.

Leslie Mann is a great comic performer. As is Michelle Buteau. As is Anna Faris. As is Isla Fisher. You'd be hard pressed to view them that way while watching this though. Buteau and Faris don't fare too badly, and they're at least allowed to play some moments in line with their strengths, but Mann spends far too much time selling us on how tired and busy her character is, and Fisher is horrendous for almost every minute of her screentime. Adam Demos gets to be a dreamy hunk able to teach yoga, cook delicious meals, and provide great orgasms, Dominic Ona-Ariki is enjoyable as the ex-husband of Buteau's character, and Erika Heynatz is the glowing, but soon-to-be-seriously-irked, Shanti.

It may be surprising to see just how messy things get for our main characters, but that's about the only thing the film has going for it. It's just a shame that Lucas and Moore can't make the mess work, comedically. It soon becomes tiresome to watch everything play out, and I guess the film-makers are relying on the fact that most people will watch this with some wine or cocktails. This is where it's important to note, however, that my partner was enjoying some wine while we watched this, and she still turned to me as the end credits rolled and exclaimed how awful it was.

Watch any other film starring any of these women and you'd be making better use of your time. Watch Babes, which features Buteau working brilliantly with her co-star, Ilana Glazer, and you're likely to laugh more during the opening sequence of that film than you are likely to laugh at anything here.

3/10

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Mubi Monday: Carlito's Way (1993)

A rewatch that I have been aiming to fit into my schedule for weeks now, Carlito's Way is, to many, just another gangster film from a director who has done more than his fair share. That's how I thought about it, and that is why I didn't rush to rewatch it when the opportunity first arose. It's actually a more interesting film than that though, and generally looks at the struggles someone can have as they try to shed their past, as well as the reputation they once had, while also having undeniable benefits to being exactly who they are.

Al Pacino is the titular Carlito, giving a performance that veers between ridiculously over the top and surprisingly restrained. Released from prison after serving five years of a sentence, all thanks to a mishandled investigation, Carlito wants to go straight. And that's what he does. But a lot of people would rather get him back into his old line of work, including his own greedy and reckless lawyer, Kleinfeld (Sean Penn). 

Considering the iconic gangster movies that Brian De Palma gave audiences in the 1980s, two very different approaches to different eras being portrayed onscreen, it must have been a hell of a risk for him to take on this project, although perhaps the appeal was just how this would allow him to take another unique approach and show a slightly different era. Adapting material by Edwin Torres, writer David Koepp crafts a screenplay that allows Carlito to keep his moral compass pointing the right way, even as many others do their best to turn him around. This isn't a film interested in crime, not really. It's a character study, but the character is, for better or worse, surrounded by people and locations tied to different criminal factions.

Although not doing so well with his voiceover narration, Pacino has a number of expected great moments here, made all the better by the fact that his character is always trying to resist the easiest option. Penn is loud and ridiculous, and keeps everything lively as his descent into uncontrollable carelessness starts to create problems and obstacles for our lead. Penelope Ann Miller does well as Gail, a potential love interest, and there's a scene set in a strip club that plays out like a fascinating inversion of the way a certain Tony Montana would have reacted to what is revealed. Luis Guzmán is as dependable as ever, John Leguizamo steals one or two scenes as the up-and-coming Benny Blanco, James Rebhorn is the lawyer wanting to make up for messing up and allowing Carlito to be released back onto the streets, and there are a number of familiar faces in other small roles, including the likes of Viggo Mortensen, Ingrid Rogers, John Ortiz, and Rick Aviles.

Making use of numerous gangster movie tropes without letting the main character stay rooted in the archetypal persona that he clearly had in his past, this also has some typical moments of De Palma brilliance when it comes to the shot choice and composition (not to dismiss the cinematography of Stephen H. Burum). It's a shame that some of the editing and structuring doesn't work, I am one of the people who don't agree with the idea that the scenes shown at the start of this add to the tension or impact of the finale, but those are very minor criticisms for a film that almost keeps you riveted for the entire 144-minute runtime. Almost.

9/10

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Netflix And Chill: Best Of The Best (2026)

If you enjoy teen comedy dramas, if you enjoy dance movies, if you enjoyed the likes of Bring It On, and if you could easily find your ears pleased by some Bollywood-fusion tunes, then Best Of The Best might just keep you as entertained as I was. In fact, the only people who will probably hate it are those hoping for a remake of the 1989 martial arts competition movie.

Besties Maya (Maitreyi Ramakrishnan) and Anjali (Priyanka Kedia) are looking forward to life at UCLA. Anjali may need a bit more help academically, but both will enjoy distancing themselves from an embarrassing incident from near the end of their schooldays (involving an onstage dance routine and some drones that went haywire). It looks like history may repeat itself, however, when the girls decide to join a Bollywood-fusion dance team, headed up by Ronak (Ankur Rathee). Anjali is liked and viewed favourable, whereas Maya is often viewed as too strong-willed and selfish. The team needs to succeed, it needs to win, and any attempts by Maya to break from some of the traditional and stuffy elements are met with great resistance. It's a difficult time, although things get a bit better when Maya gets involved with Arjun (Chaneil Kular).

Co-written by Prashanth Venkataramanujam and Hasan Minhaj (the latter also allowed a small supporting role onscreen, as well as both creatives shepherding this through from inception to completion via their production company, 186K Films), Best Of The Best is a familiar slice of teen fun, nicely in line with the many smarter movies we've had in that sub-genre throughout the first quarter of this century. The cultural plot points are inextricably woven throughout, and this is another film that recognises the apparent paradox of very specific touchstones working to make something that has universal appeal.

Director Lena Khan may not have many features to her name, but this might serve as a great springboard for whatever she wants to do next in her directorial career.  It's a perfect balance of fun, energy, emotional turbulence, and self-reflection, and she's helped enormously by her main cast members.

Ramakrishnan delivers a star-making turn here (after impressing in a few other film roles, and playing the main character in the popular Never Have I Ever TV show). She's smart, funny, very talented, and happy to mishandle things when weighed down by prejudices and negativity from others. Kedia has the easier role, but she plays it well, especially in a third act that requires some extra honesty from her character once she sees how life has been viewed a very different way by her best friend. She also keeps up with her co-star when it comes to the impressive dance routines. Rathee is suitably driven and stubborn as he engages in a battle of wills with someone who has some ideas he would really benefit from hearing out, Kular is as sweet and charming as he needs to be in his role, and Minhaj has fun in the couple of scenes that have his Professor character being much more aware than he'd like to be of the ongoing dance team drama.

A fresh and vibrant wander through some familiar territory, Best Of The Best is easygoing entertainment that should keep most viewers happy. It's also an excellent bit of representation for some viewers who probably wouldn't expect to see themselves in such a well-platformed mainstream teen movie.

8/10

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Shudder Saturday: Parasomnia (2025)

A few people may remember a film from almost 20 years ago called Parasomnia. That was written and directed by William Malone, it wasn't seen by many people, and I quite enjoyed it. As weak as it was in some ways, it had ideas and imagery that made it strong in others. When this film appeared on the Shudder streaming platform I just assumed that they had decided to platform the 2008 movie. Then I realised I was wrong. So I decided to give it a watch. Then I realised I was wrong again. This is a bad film that I would advise most people avoid.

Jasmine Mathews plays Riley, a young woman who sometimes gets night terrors, and those night terrors can allow an entity to cross through into our world and kill people. Riley believes that she now has things under control though. That's not quite right. It's not long until people around her are in danger, but it may not be Riley's fault. There may be people trying to force Riley to react in a certain way, hoping to make use of the power that flows from her condition.

Written and directed by James Ross II, Parasomnia is a small movie that needed a strong idea at the heart of it. Unfortunately, it doesn't have that. Arguably even more unfortunately, everyone involved with it seems to mistakenly believe that it does. The plot developments and minor twists and turns are delivered in a way that somehow feels very proud and self-assured when they should have been downplayed and obscured by a number of other simple pleasures (a bit more bloodshed, for example, and a much more playful tone for the majority of the runtime). Nothing here adheres to the general movie rule of "show, don't tell", and instead we get "tell, show, tell again" throughout many scenes.

Mathews isn't bad in her main role, but she's not given good material to work with. There are one or two moments in the third act that show how much better she could have been with a better screenplay, which is more than can be said for some of the people around her. Two of those people are RJ Brown and Sally Stewart (playing, respectively, Cam and Cam's mother). They're disappointingly weak, especially Stewart, who should have really been able to sink her teeth into things here, and that's harder to overlook when they're given so much screentime. Stephen Barrington does better with a much smaller role, Danny Brown is only around for a couple of minutes, and two other important characters are portrayed well enough by Simon Longnight and David Girard.

I can name you hundreds of movies that you should watch ahead of this one, and many of those movies will make use of very similar elements (whether you're after something with sleep demons in the mix, something twisting around and leading to what should be an impactful reveal in the third act, or something that has people being burned when they try to handle an evil energy that cannot be safely harnessed). One of those movies has the exact same title. You should avoid Parasomnia. But check out Parasomnia.

3/10

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Hope (2026)

Another week, another South Korean movie that has me worrying about which way round I will write the names in order to maintain the correct formatting. Such worries never stop me from diving in to review things though, especially when it's something that has already garnered some strong opinions.

The small village of Hope Harbor has been devastated. That's the only word for it. Ko Bum-seok (Hwang Jung-min), the local police chief, starts his day by investigating a dead cow, but soon finds out that many human lives have been loft, and a lot of buildings have been destroyed by some kind of large monster. He's helped by some locals, some more enthusiastic than others, and a less experienced, but very capable, colleague (Im Sung-ae, played by Jung Ho-yeon), as he tries to track and destroy the beast. The good news is that it is possible to hurt it. The bad news is that there may be more than one.

Written and directed by Na Hong-jin, who already has a number of celebrated films to his name, Hope is 160 minutes of what many could view as tense and impressive action. I certainly enjoyed the first 30-45 minutes, which mostly consist of our leading man exploring the destroyed village while trying to find answers to the central mystery. It's when that mystery starts to become far less mysterious that the film starts to go downhill.

Almost everyone who has seen Hope seems to want to say that it's a fun time without a proper ending. While this is true, in some respects, it's also worth mentioning that it's an ugly film, and not for the right reasons. I was astonished to see some of the bad CGI in this, mainly because nobody else seems to mentioned it as something that really takes viewers out of some scenes. Okay, the second half tries to remain fast and frenetic, and there are some superb stunts, but it's still hard to sit back and enjoy something with such awkward and unpleasant imagery. It's maybe not PSOne era stuff, but it certainly doesn't feel as if it belongs in a 2026 feature film.

Jung-min and Ho-yeon are great in their main roles, and they maintain the right feeling of nerves and adrenalin throughout. Zo In-sung plays another character who ends up working with them, and he does a great job at being a bit more strong-willed and fearless for most of the runtime. While both Michael Fassbender and Alicia Vikander are credited, they are unrecognisable as they portray two of the main creatures laying waste to the village and village residents.

The trailer for this had me excited, and I was very much ready for another slice of greatness from Na Hong-jin. Sadly, this wasn't anywhere near as good as I hoped it would be (no pun intended). It needed trimmed down in places, it needed an ending that was either more satisfying or more of a tease for anything else to come, and it needed much more time and money spent on some of the VFX. There's good stuff here, but it's surrounded by a number of major errors.

5/10

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Practical Magic 2 (2026)

Having very recently revisited, and been underwhelmed by, Practical Magic, I must admit to being a bit hesitant to check out this very recent sequel. Being aware that the first film was aimed at a very different audience demographic, I was unlikely to be won over by anything attempting to appeal to the fanbase. But I ended up going along to see it nonetheless, and I guess I can review it here, with the proviso that those who loved the first movie can feel free to completely ignore my opinions on either film.

The Owens sisters (Sally, played by Sandra Bullock and Gillian, played by Nicole Kidman) continue to live their lives under the shadow of a curse that kills off any man they love. Gillian continues to take this as good reason to stay carefree and unattached. Sally takes it as a good reason to turn her back on magic and protect her children. Ignoring a major problem doesn't make it go away though, and death is coming for someone. It could be one of the lovable aunties (Dianne Wiest and Stockard Channing), or it could be the young man that Kylie (played by Joey King) ends up falling in love with.

With Kelly Marcel and Georgia Pritchett joining (returning) writer Akiva Goldsman for the screenplay this time, Practical Magic 2 is, perhaps unsurprisingly, a slightly better film than the one that preceded it. It feels as if everyone came back because of a love for the characters, and director Susanne Bier has a better handle on the material, avoiding the uneven tonal issues that we got the first time around.

Bullock and Kidman are great in the main roles, both working well alongside one another, and I was happy to see Wiest and Channing returning. As for the newcomers, King gets to be the focus of the main storyline this time around, and she does well, but Maisie Williams, as Antonia, the other daughter of Sally, gets very little to do. Lee Pace shines in a supporting role that makes the most of his screen presence, and Solly McLeod comes along just in time to get involved in the expected third act shenanigans.

It's all light and charming, and everything is certainly designed to appeal to those who would rush to see what they might call a long-overdue sequel to something they have cherished for many years, but it's also enjoyably consistent with the messaging about sisterhood, parent-child relationships, and female empowerment. You get the callbacks to the first movie that feel essential, you get the kind of cosiness that makes it feel like one of the better seasonal Hallmark movies (and I am NOT meaning that as anything other than a compliment), and it's another in an ever-growing list of movies that provides very positive representation of witches in the modern world.

Will it be remembered in a year or two from now? I'm not so sure about that. It tries to weave a spell while you watch it though, and many others will be affected more than I was. I enjoyed it, and I think it's a very pleasant final chapter to a story that I didn't think needed any more added to it, but it's not one I'll recommend to anyone who wasn't already rushing to the cinema to see it. 

6/10

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Prime Time: The Runner (2026)

With the title giving you all you need to know, The Runner is all about a female attorney (Maia, played by Gal Gadot) who gets an unexpected call while out on her morning run. That call is from someone who claims to have kidnapped her young son (Rory Wilmot), holding him hostage while Maia is made to run from one location to the next, ultimately being ordered to kill a vital witness being kept in a secure location before a big upcoming trial.

That's all there is to it, but there's somehow even less to this film than what I've described here. It's dull, it's laughable at times (there's a sequence in which Gal Gadot is running and trying to figure out how to get around a group of chatting mothers that plays out like a parody of an action movie sequence), and there's a reveal in the third act that is both ridiculous and insulting to the audience.

Director Kevin Macdonald has been making feature films for a while now, but I would argue that he was much better when delivering fantastic documentaries. This is a star vehicle (and anyone wanting a film that focuses on Gadot in running gear should be kept happy enough), but that doesn't excuse how little effort Macdonald seems to make to cover up the weakness of Mark Gibson's screenplay. Okay, you can't fix a severed limb with a small sticking plaster, and Gibson (who doesn't have the best back catalogue when it comes to his writing) doesn't provide a strong foundation for everyone else to work on, but I was desperate for something, anything, to be done in a way that felt as if someone was trying.

Gadot is terrible in the lead role, and I assume she was asked to do the role because she could manage to run for multiple takes. It's just a shame that she is unable to run and act convincingly at the same time. That might not be so bad if she wasn't the focus of about 95% of the screentime, but she is. If you point your cameras at a vacuum for 95% of a movie then you're movie is going to feel like a vacuum. Wilmot isn't too bad for his few minutes onscreen, Damian Lewis gets paid for what I hope was a minimal amount of work, and one or two others appear in roles that are pivotal to the plot, but actually as unmemorable as almost everyone else in the movie.

I don't really know how this could have been improved enough to make it worth your time. A different lead? That might have helped. Some kind of self-aware tone that would have allowed the director to make use of action movie tropes while finding a device to ensure that the main character was unable to stop running (drop under 5mph and a bomb goes off or something, I am sure that concept has worked well elsewhere). Or maybe it couldn't be salvaged. Maybe this is a movie that should have been binned after the first draft. Because most viewers will find their patience wearing thinner than the soles on Gadot's running shoes.

2/10

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