Shudder Saturday: Small Town Killers (2017)

A Danish crime comedy that feels very much like a minor Coen brothers movie from early on in their filmography, this is a tale of unhappy spouses hiring killers to deal with their problems, soon realising that the initial idea was only good in theory, and love still remains.

Nicolas Bro and Ulrich Thomsen play Ib and Edward, respectively. Ib is married to Gritt (Mia Lyhne). Edward is married to Ingrid (Lene Maria Christensen). When the men are not being hassled by the local law enforcement (Heinz, played by Søren Malling), they are being given grief by their unhappy wives. And so, after a session of heavy drinking, Edward staggers to a computer and orders an assassin. The Russian (Marcin Dorocinski) arrives, the men wonder if they'll be able to call off the whole thing, and events spiral from there, especially when the women hear of the scheme and hire their own killer, an eccentric elderly English lady named Miss Nippleworthy (Gwen Taylor).

Written and directed by Ole Bornedal (who gave us the excellent Nightwatch about 25 years ago), Small Town Killers is an amusing black comedy that plays around with ideas familiar to anyone who has seen almost any other film in this vein. It's not trying to be groundbreaking or revelatory. It's just trying to be entertaining, which it manages. It's just a shame that Bornedal couldn't find a way to step things up slightly. He has a great cast, yet they often feel as if they're not being used to their full potential.

Bro and Thomsen are endearing losers, with Thomsen doing a particular good number of hangdog expressions of exasperation. Lyhne and Christensen help to keep their characters from being shrill caricatures, instead portraying a pair of women understandably unhappy with husbands who seem to have stopped appreciating them, or making much of an effort, a long time ago. Both Dorocinski and Taylor are very good in their very different performances, with the former being almost permanently drunk, or at least slightly dazed, and the latter being cool and evil under a cunning disguise of old age and politeness.

Amusing, as I already said, but never hilarious. Dark, but never as dark as it could be. Small Town Killers keeps itself very much in a safe middle ground, despite the nature of the content, and that's the biggest problem that it has. Bornedal should have ramped up either the comedy or the darkness. In fact, I suspect ramping up the latter would have automatically helped with the former. There are some onscreen deaths, of course, but this is a film that I suspect would have benefited from a higher bodycount and a sense of increasing mayhem and danger.

If you get the chance to see this without paying any extra for it (e.g. it is on Shudder at the moment) then give it a go. No individual part of it completely fails, and the pacing whisks you speedily enough from the start to the finish. It's just not one that you'll remember a few months later, until someone else mentions it and you give a nod and let them know it was okay.

6/10

You can buy the movie here.

Noir-vember: Whispering Footsteps (1943)

Look, it's not the best reason to watch a movie, I admit it, but I had a very short amount of time before I was due to get ready for work and this clocks in at about 52 minutes. I decided to roll the dice, allowing me to check out something I hadn't previously heard of, and Whispering Footsteps continues to allow me to believe that there's no such thing as a bad film noir. While this may not be one of the better ones you could choose to watch, it's guaranteed to not outstay its welcome.

John Hubbard plays a bank clerk named Marcus Aurelius Borne AKA Mark. He seems to be quite well-liked and friendly enough. But things soon change when his description matches that of the main suspect in a series of murders. The coincidental timing of the deaths also doesn't help, with every subsequent newsflash proving more and more damning for Mark. There's a detective staying on his tail (played by Cy Kendall), a lot of glances from those who start gossiping, and a couple of ladies happy to help provide him with alibis, for their own reasons.

Directed by Howard Bretherton, a man who churned out about 100 movies between the 1930s and 1940s, his peak working years, this is very competent stuff, and becomes more and more fun as things build towards a finale that keeps you guessing right up until the last minute. The bodies pile up, our lead starts to look more and more suspicious (is he becoming bolder or is his luck just really THAT bad?), and there's an interesting look at how people turn on others, when there's just enough fuel added to their sense of fear.

Written by Dane Lussier and Gertrude Walker, the fact that the plot makes a strength of the bland lead (his blandness helps to maintain the ambiguity of the central concept, while also ensuring that he could always be a potential fit for the killer) is arguably the best thing about it. Mark may not be a character you warm to, or particularly like, but that means nobody will mind the end result, whichever way things go.

While Hubbard is a good fit for the role, the casting around him helps immensely. Kendall is wonderful throughout, always popping up to look at Hubbard and make him nervous. Rita Quigley and Joan Blair are both wonderful as the two women that Hubbard ends up being close to, he has known the former a long time while the latter is new in town, but happy to help him out while it covers up her own behaviour that would be frowned upon at that time. Charles Halton also does well, playing the boss of Hubbard's character, but the less said about the character played by Juanita Quigley, a young girl who shrieks and screams at even the tamest surprise, the better.

Perhaps destined to remain forgotten, due to the lack of star power and the slight nature of the plot, Whispering Footsteps isn't one to go out of your way for, but it's a fun little diversion if you want to watch something and only have a spare hour in your schedule.

6/10

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Noir-vember: Sweet Smell Of Success (1957)

Burt Lancaster is a cinematic icon that I fear some find far too easy to forget. You can easily recall his powerful physique, which served him well as a circus acrobat for many years (a role he recreated for film in Trapeze). That perfect grin is also hard to forget. He was like a more muscular Gregory Peck, a perfect figure often instilled with a sense of quiet strength and nobility (arguably used to best effect in The Swimmer). Sweet Smell Of Success has Lancaster in a very atypical role, compared to every other performance from him that I can think of, and it easily sits alongside his best work.

Lancaster plays newspaper columnist J. J. Hunsecker, a man who finds out everything about everyone, and has no problem in deciding whether or not others should find out that information. He can make or break careers, he can make or break lives, and he knows it. He also has a very willing assistant in the form of press agent Sidney Falco (Tony Curtis). Falco needs to get his clients mentioned by Hunsecker, which means he is willing to do numerous manipulative errands for him, and to hell with the consequences. But things get murkier and murkier as Hunsecker becomes obsessed with breaking up his sister (Susan Harrison) and the jazz guitarist she has fallen in love with (Martin Milner).

Based on a story written by Ernest Lehman, that drew from his own experiences as an assistant to an influential press agent and columnist, Sweet Smell Of Success is the kind of scabrous delight that has you appalled, has you grinning as you lap up the script and performances, and then has you wanting to jump in the shower after it, scrubbing the grime off your body that has been layered there while you have mingled in the company of Hunsecker and co. The script, co-written by Lehman and Clifford Odets, is a treat throughout, coating even the most spiteful exchanges in some honey that makes them go down all the easier. Or, to quote from the film itself, it's "a cookie full of arsenic".

Director Alexander Mackendrick was best known for his much lighter vehicles for the Ealing Studio, but does a great job here. I'm sure that Lancaster, who also had a producing role and a vested interest in the project, did what he could to shape and guide things, but Mackendrick was no malleable amateur, and he expertly weaves things together into a beautiful spiderweb made up of tiny nooses, all ready to tighten around the necks of different characters at any given point in the plot.

In case it wasn't obvious from the opening paragraph, Lancaster is superb in the role of Hunsecker. He may not have the greatest share of the screentime, but it is his presence and force of will that cast the longest shadow. Curtis gives a performance to rival it, although his manner is very different. Where Hunsecker is manipulative and smart, Falco is manipulative and also too desperate to play things as cool as they should be played, and Curtis portrays his character as someone constantly hopping from one foot to the other, desperately buying time with everyone around him (contacts, Hunsecker, people he is setting out to blackmail). Harrison does well in her role, and the brother-sister relationship at the heart of the story is one with disturbing undertones (considering how crazed Hunsecker becomes as he aims to constantly "protect" his sister), and Milner is perfectly cast as a good person undeserving of the attempted attacks upon his character.

As iconic as anything else that Curtis or Lancaster did, Sweet Smell Of Success is a pitch-black classic through and through. If you have yet to see it, do so immediately. If you see it and somehow don't like it, well . . . "That's fish four days old. I won't buy it!"

10/10

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Prime Time: The Big Combo (1955)

Although not at the very top of the film noir tree (which is like a normal tree but . . . extra shady), The Big Combo is a dark and thrilling crime pic, one that depicts a battle of wills between a good cop and a very bad crook, with the latter always seeming to be one step ahead of the former.

Cornel Wilde is Police Lt. Leonard Diamond, a cop obsessed with bringing down a dangerous gangster named Mr. Brown (Richard Conte). It would appear, at least initially, that the key to bringing down Mr. Brown lies with a woman in his past, Alicia, and Diamond puts more and more people in danger as he continues to circle closer to the truth.

Directed by the prolific Joseph H. Lewis, and with a script written by the equally prolific Philip Yordan, The Big Combo is a film made by people who know just how far they can take things to make viewers uncomfortable without stumbling into territory that many would find distasteful. It feels nasty and vicious throughout, and the main protagonist often feels in very real danger, but it also uses a number of the tropes of noir to somehow make you more comfortable while the events unfold.

This is all aided by the main performances. Wilde is solid and upstanding in the lead, so much so that while you worry for him you can also sense that he will make it through whatever happens and come out of the other side okay. Conte exudes complete confidence, and menace, throughout, which also makes it possible that you could reach the end credits without seeing him receive the justice he deserves. Brian Donlevy is very good as the right hand man to Brown, named Joe McClure, and the main female characters, portrayed by Jean Wallace, Helen Walker, and Helene Stanton, are all absolutely pivotal to the storyline, in different ways. The supporting cast also includes the likes of Robert Middleton, Jay Adler, John Hoyt, Earl Holliman, and Lee Van Cleef.

Released in 1955, towards the very end of what many view as the classic period for film noir, this is a film that manages to play around with the familiar without warping any of it. Everything that you expect is present and correct, but it's not necessarily in the classic form that makes it easier to notice. The weakest element, sadly, is Yordan's script, which does a good job with the characters and most of the plotting, but fails to have that sizzling heat that the best noirs had. I cannot reel off any truly memorable lines of dialogue from this, and my ears didn't perk up during any particular exchanges. There are many good lines here and there, but nothing truly great.

Is there such a thing as a bad film noir? If there is, I cannot think of any that I have discovered yet. Maybe I have just been really lucky so far. The Big Combo is another good one. It just suffers in comparison with many of the better, and better-known, titles that I've already seen. I still recommend it to fans, as long as you've watched a number of the more celebrated noirs before you get to it.

7/10

There's a nice disc here for you.

Noir-vember: The Grifters (1990)

Roy (Joan Cusack), Lilly (Anjelica Huston), and Myra (Annette Bening) are three con artists, and they're working on different levels. They're also connected in ways they might sometimes wish they weren't. Lily is Roy's mother, although she hasn't been in his life for many years, and Myra is his girlfriend. There's trouble brewing when these three end up in the same space together, and a chain of events start to unfold that is both dark and tragic, and also sadly inevitable.

Directed by Stephen Frears, The Grifters remains one of my favourite neo-noirs and one of my favourite con movies, and I do love me a whole load of con movies. I was absolutely blown away when I first saw it, over two decades ago, and the passing of time has done nothing to dull the power of the final scenes.

Based on a book by Jim Thompson, the script by Donald E. Westlake (no stranger to writing some gritty crime fare himself) manages to consistently entertain and inform while viewers also see (and hear, thanks to the great score from Elmer Bernstein) those big storm clouds gathering. Even the earlier moments of darkness, such as a character receiving a blow to the stomach so hard that he develops some internal bleeding, have a lighter touch before the world that these characters inhabit starts to oppress and restrain them further, trying to forcefully imprint on them the fact that there's no escape for anyone who has spent so long living that lifestyle.

Despite his many iconic roles over the years, Cusack gives a performance here that easily sits alongside his very best, and it is always a pleasure to be reminded of the time he used to seem to care about his work. His effortless cool is tempered by his baby-faced looks, allowing him to maintain an innocent and friendly manner with anyone he decides to try and wring some money from. Bening is just as smart and savvy, in many ways, but uses her looks and sex appeal to get what she wants, and she also delivers a top performance. Then you have Huston, a veteran who knows that her days may be numbered. How much can she put away before then? Is it even possible for her to get out? This constant scheming, and desperation, informs the superb performance from Huston, and Lilly is one of many brilliant characters she's given us over her career, a devious monster that will turn your stomach by the time the end credits roll.

Stephen Frears seems to enjoy leading viewers into the world of these characters, showing us the art of the cons with no small amount of admiration for those with the skill and, well, confidence to pull them off. It feels like most of the work has been done before the cameras even started rolling, between the superb casting and the choice of everyone working behind the camera, from the writer to the editor, etc, and the final product falls just shy of being a flawless classic.

As a major bonus, you also get supporting turns from Pat Hingle (playing the boss Lilly works for), J. T. Walsh, Charles Napier, and small amounts of screentime for Stephen Tobolowsky, Sandy Baron, Xander Berkeley, and Jeremy Piven (blink and you may miss him though).

A tough film to recommend to people, due to the dark nature of the content, but I do so anyway. You won't be grinning and ready to skip back to the real world straight after you've watched it, but you may well find that you have a new favourite film.

9/10

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Mubi Monday: The Souvenir (2019)

Written and directed by Joanna Hogg, The Souvenir is an interesting and intelligent look at the blinkers some people can so easily put on while in a relationship with someone they are deeply in love with. It's also quite poorly handled, surprising considering the amount of praise it received when initially released.

Honor Swinton Byrne plays Julie, a film school student who ends up sliding into a relationship with Anthony (played by Tom Burke). Anthony works for the Home Office. It also turns out that he's a heroin addict, but the kind of heroin addict who can continue to charm and fool many people around him, even as his behaviour gets worse and worse. Those people do exist, and Hogg may have even known someone exactly like Anthony (considering the fact that the film feels pretty semi-autobiographical throughout), but it's an important stumbling block between the viewer and the events unfolding onscreen.

The performers all do well here, with Swinton Byrne especially arresting in a debut lead performance that is nigh-on impossible to discuss without considering how well she could follow in the footsteps of her mother (Tilda Swinton, who also appears here, playing . . . Swinton Byrne's mother). Burke tries his best, despite the script working against him, and there are decent little turns from Swinton and one or two others, including an all-too-brief turn from Richard Ayoade.

Hogg observes the ups and downs of the central relationship with her usual care. This is the clean, almost sterile, world of the upper classes, where even drug addiction doesn't automatically lead to squalor and grime. In fact, good grief, viewers are only ever shown the behaviour caused by the drug-taking, never the act itself. Is that because Hogg never saw it? Or is it because she wants to allow her viewership to believe they are seeing a peek into a whole other world without ever actually showing them anything that might make them genuinely uncomfortable? Sadly, it feels like the latter, which is a great shame, especially when she has onscreen characters discussing the way they view the world from a position of great privilege.

Perhaps I am being a bit too harsh here, you could argue that I am getting my hackles up as I spy some class warfare skirmish that is never present. You could also argue that those who have more money, or access to more money, can always function better while addicts than those who are poor. But that's kind of the point. Hogg may be writing what she knows, but this could have easily been given a bit more work to resonate with so many other people. Add some more troublesome incidents. Add a lot of interference and undisguised loathing from those looking on. Add texture to let viewers know that even the bubble of class doesn't protect people completely from the greatest damage that such self-harming vices can cause.

As I said, however, the performances here are very good. Swinton Byrne is a riveting presence, and I look forward to whatever she does next. The look and feel of the movie is also very good, for what it is. The biggest problem is the script, and it's a problem that none of the other elements can quite distract you from for more than a few minutes at a time.

5/10

You are welcome to buy the movie here.

Netflix And Chill: The Stranger (1946)

I deliberately picked this one, that hadn't previously been on my radar, to show that there are SOME older titles tucked away on Netflix (although they are few and far between).

Edward G. Robinson plays Mr. Wilson, someone who works for the United Nations War Crimes Commission. He's hunting for Franz Kindler, a famous Nazi criminal believed to now be hiding away in America, and decides to make the unorthodox move of releasing one of his former associates, one Konrad Meinike (Konstantin Shayne), to flush him out. The only thing known about Kindler is that he has an obsession, bordering on mania, with clocks. But it's not long until Wilson finds a prime suspect, in the shape of a man named Charles Rankin (Orson Welles), leading to a race against time to prove who he really is, and take him down.

As well as giving himself a main role, Welles also directs this interesting and tense film noir (unsurprisingly), which leads to some extra polish being laid over what could have easily been a disposable piece of pulp. This is not a mystery film, it's a game of cat and mouse with both main parties involved soon guessing what the other is up to and trying to circumvent their plans. And it's a film about a man convinced that he has done the right thing, according to his own ideology, who then tries to keep himself going "in the right direction" until it looks as if he is doomed to fail. At that point, anyone and everyone can be sacrificed as he tries to ensure his freedom.

Based on an original story by Victor Trivas, who helped with Decla Dunning to adapt it for the screen, carried over the finish line by Anthony Veiller, this is a familiar tale of an insidious threat hiding in Anytown, USA. It's interestingly structured, especially when you see how quickly the mystery element is done away with, and builds tension brilliantly in a couple of impressive set-pieces that essentially bookend the movie.

Although Shayne does well in his small role, and there are solid performances here from Loretta Young (the woman who unwittingly marries a war criminal) and Richard Long (playing her brother), it's often hard for a film directed by, and starring, Welles to not be dominated by him. He always knew how to give himself magical moments of cinema, and he does it again here, especially good as he continues to be charming and horribly persuasive in a way that gives just the tiniest glimpse of how people like him become leaders and maintain self-belief in the face of overwhelming criticism from sensible and compassionate humans. Robinson is a worthy adversary for him, and has an equal level of confidence, given the edge by the fact that he is on the side of what is actually right.

I'm not sure how well-known this is to people, it was certainly not one that had previously been on my radar, but it's definitely worth checking out for fans of film noir, and for fans of either of the two main stars. Something relatively simple is given more complexity and weight than others may have afforded it, and the ending is up there with some of the all-time great noirs, so I'm glad I stumbled across it, and I now happily recommend it to others.

8/10

There's a pricey, but nice, package available here.
Americans can get a nice disc here.

Shudder Saturday: Nightmare Cinema (2018)

The main thing to take away from Nightmare Cinema is this; if you're in a cinema and you find out that Mickey Rourke is smirking as he projects the movies onscreen while slinking his snakehips up and down the aisles to chat to the patrons then you need to get the hell out of there.

The second thing to take away from it is not to be fooled by an anthology horror movie that tries to squash together some big names alongside some lesser-known names to provide solid entertainment for horror fans. This is not solid entertainment. It is, sadly, quite the disappointment.

There are five main tales here, framed by the scariest element of the whole thing (that Rourke-shaped projectionist), and only two work as well as they should. First up is a strong opener, The Thing In The Woods, written and directed by Alejandro Brugués. It's a fun romp through familiar territory until viewers are given an extra piece of information that turns everything on its head. Great fun, a decent twist, and a solid ending. Exactly what you want from a short film/anthology segment. Next up is Mirari, written by Richard Christian Matheson and directed by Joe Dante. I wanted to love this, it's been a while since the last thing I saw from Joe Dante, but that wasn't to be the case. It's not bad, and becomes increasingly twisted and gross in the second half, but it's all far too close to a very famous episode of The Twilight Zone (that I won't namecheck here, it gives too much away). Things get worse from there, with Mashit, which is written by Sandra Becerril and directed by Ryûhei Kitamura. This tale of demonic possession gives you nobody, and nothing, to care about. And it goes on for far too long. This Way To Egress is directed by David Slade, who also co-wrote the tale with Lawrence C. Connolly (writer of the short story it is based on). Funnily enough, although this is a big step up after the previous two tales, the biggest problem it has is that it's VERY similar to one of the newer episodes of The Twilight Zone. Again, naming the episode would give too much away, but it will feel very familiar to anyone who saw the latest series. Last, ending with a whimper instead of a bang, is Dead, written and directed by Mick Garris.

As uneven as the cast are throughout this selection of horror stories, that feels slightly unimportant anyway, considering the main draw for many people will be those involved behind the camera. And yet . . . just how many of these names ARE a big enough draw for all but the most die-hard fans of their work. I'll watch anything Dante does, his name is the hot ticket here, but I can take or leave the rest. Brugues and Slade have, for the most part, worked on TV content or other shorts over the past few years, which perhaps explains why they do better within this format. Kitamura impressed me with the vicious Downrange just a couple of years ago, but he's still not someone I would necessarily seek out. As for Garris, I remain perplexed by his "master of horror" status. It always seems like a little club he made up for him and his friends after spending a number of years riding the coat-tails of Stephen King (and this is coming from someone who has a major soft spot for The Stand).

It's glaringly obvious where the main flaws lie here, from the stories that have the weaker scripts to the general inability to pare things down to a more appealing runtime. Both Mashit and Dead would have been improved by being cut down to about 50% of their current length, for example, and cuts could also have been made elsewhere. There's also a feeling that not every director was paired up with material best suited to their style. Dante, for example, has to work with a tale that is set largely in a sterile hospital environment. Who thought that was a good idea? His "home ground", as it were, is American suburbia, either realistic or cine-realistic, and something that allows him to use everything he has genuine affection for in ways that he always makes fresh and more entertaining.

There's not much more to say. I don't want to make this feel like a review of the worst anthology horror movie ever. It's still worth a watch for the better stories (and other viewers will have different opinions on what works and what doesn't). It's just disappointing for those who want something a bit more memorable. Having said that, it's STILL largely better than the new Creepshow series.

5/10

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Noir-vember: Laura (1944)

Considering the many classic film noirs I have covered in my blog, I was surprised to realise that I had never praised Laura here. Given my love for it, I then decided that it was the best choice for the start of 2019's Noir-vember season here.

The radiantly beautiful Gene Tierney (and yes, I do always have to use numerous complimentary adjectives when describing one of my all-time favourite leading ladies) plays the titular female in a movie that begins with the discovery of her corpse and then moves on through numerous twists and turns until the killer is revealed. We get to know a lot about Laura through numerous flashbacks, prompted by the sassy investigating detective (Mark McPherson, played by Dana Andrews), including how she came to be friends with the acerbic newspaper columnist Waldo Lydecker (Clifton Webb), how messy things were getting with her fiancé Shelby Carpenter (Vincent Price).

This is a murder-mystery noir movie that shows just how damaging love can be, even when it's disguised as a pure and innocent love for someone that people claim to care deeply for. Everything covered by that great driving force is here; passion, jealousy, pride, happiness and unhappiness, self-doubt and much more. Although a number of different names were credited, and uncredited, with writing the script, a lot of the credit must go to the writer of the source material, Vera Caspary, and director Otto Preminger.

Preminger has the double bonus of being able to match great material with a great cast to produce a memorable little movie. Tierney is peerless (I have seen about half a dozen of her movies now, and that opinion has not wavered), Andrews is cool and slightly hard-boiled, if not nearly as tough as he could have been, Webb is like a male Bette Davis, and battles with Price over who can deliver their dialogue best. The latter is a great mixture of awkwardness, guile and confidence. It may be odd to watch Price as a younger man, clean-shaven and not as menacing as he would be in so many of his horror movie roles, but viewers can get a lot of enjoyment from the way he cannot so much as get a drink of water without looking inordinately guilty.

I think it would be easy for many people to class this as a "rainy afternoon" movie, but if that's the case then all I can say is that I hope the weather stays bad, at least long enough for others to catch up with it. And then you can join the ranks of so many other people who have fallen in love with Gene Tierney. Because to know her is to love her, which is probably why she works so well in the main role here.

9/10

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3 From Hell (2019)

Here's the one thing that I know about the feature film career of Rob Zombie. I am one of the many voices making up part of the problem. I LOVE his first film, he still hasn't topped it for me. It's a carnival sideshow experience in which you are taken by a variety of eye-catching grotesqueries by someone you don't entirely trust. Unfortunately, every movie he has given us after that one has been more of the same, with the exception of two movies that many fans didn't care for. I love The Haunted World Of El Superbeasto. I didn't love The Lords Of Salem. Sadly, the more that Zombie retreats back into his comfort zone, the more I appreciate him trying to channel Ken Russell in The Lords Of Salem, and the less likely it is that we will ever see him try that again.

Which brings us to 3 From Hell, a film that continues the saga of "the Firefly family", the notorious and nasty criminals we last saw being abruptly halted by a hail of bullets as they headed towards a police roadblock. The basic plot is similar to The Devil's Rejects, it's three bad people doing bad things until a final encounter leads them towards either another victory or potential death.

Sheri Moon Zombie, Bill Moseley, and Sid Haig in place? Check (although the role for Haig was greatly reduced, he has only one main scene, when news of his illness came along just before his death this year). A decent soundtrack? Check (note - it's still a bold move for ANY film to use In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida even all these years after Manhunter). Maniacs who like to deliver verbose dialogue before they commit their atrocities? Check. A '70s aesthetic throughout, no matter what time the film is supposed to be set in? Check. The baddies being a lot smarter/luckier than anyone with their M.O. would be? Check.

On paper, this should be another easy win for Zombie. It's not though. Although it fails in different ways to 31 (which remains arguably his worst film), it still fails. Some fans may disagree with that, and I'm happy that Zombie is at least keeping his core fanbase happy. He seems to have a good relationship with them, and often delivers just what they want. It's just a shame that he doesn't take a chance nowadays on exploring other genre styles that will allow him to grow more, and potentially surprise audiences.

Most, but not all, of the problems here like with Zombie himself. The script is more of the nonsense that he likes to hear being delivered by his favourite actors, always a mix of gleeful nihilism and purported wisdom from those who are savvy enough not to be constrained by the laws imposed upon society by men who just weren't brave enough to give in to their base desires at all times. It also all starts off on the wrong foot, a double whammy of viewers being told a time period that never feels right and an air of sympathy for the main characters that you just can't see ever happening. EVER. Nobody onscreen is worth supporting.

The second main problem, aside from anything done directly by Zombie, comes from the main performances. Few people onscreen are actually bad, but they're rarely actually good either. Moseley is pretty much in self-parody territory now, pushed into that area by Zombie, and every moment he's onscreen feels a bit silly. Richard Brake, stepping in to the void left by Haig, has the potential to make a better impression in the role of Winslow AKA "Foxy", but he ends up looking and sounding far too much like Moseley. That leaves us with Mrs Zombie, who is the worst of the three, and suffers the most from the script. There's just no way anyone would consider her for a parole hearing, for example, given her history of constant unpredictable madness, and she's getting a bit too old to play the role in the same giggling and coquettish way she did back in House Of 1000 Corpses. You get supporting roles for people such as Daniel Roebuch, Jeff Daniel Phillips, Dee Wallace, Bill Oberst Jr, Danny Trejo, Pancho Moler, Emilio Rivera, and many others, although some are little more than the most fleeting of cameos it is some light relief to spot some of the familiar faces dotted around.

With House Of 1000 Corpses and The Devil's Rejects, Zombie delivered one hell of a double-bill. That hasn't changed. It's just that some people will have an inferior third instalment they can choose to watch at the end. Or, and bear with me, we can all forget it exists and just stay a lot happier. This film says nothing worthwhile, does nothing new, and deserves, well, I am sure you can guess.

3/10

Here's the movie available from Rob Zombie's site (because he needs the clicks more than I do . . . the blogger typed sarcastically).

Prime Time: Infestation (2009)

Despite my fear of them (fear, revulsion, general feeling of starting to itch, depending on what species is onscreen), I do occasionally like a horror movie that features some killer insects. Infestation is a comedy horror, but it's one of many that fails to make the comedy funny enough or the horror content actually scary, or thrilling or bloody enough.

Chris Marquette plays Cooper, a young man who we first see heading in to his work, late as usual. He doesn't seem to have any motivation, which disappoints his father (Ray Wise) no end, and thinks a fun way to waste some time is to call someone's name and then immediately look as if he is busy with something else. That game COULD be fun, I suppose, if it looked as if there was more than one person playing. There isn't, not really, and so all we have is a pointless set-up for a payoff much later on, which is actually almost worth it. Anyway, a load of bugs grab everyone, wrapping them up to come back and harvest later, which leads to Cooper fighting for survival with a group of disposable supporting players.

Written and directed by Kyle Rankin (who would go on to direct the more enjoyable Night Of The Living Deb a number of years after this, as well as a few other movies I've yet to check out), Infestation has far too many problems to make it as much fun as it wants to be.

First of all, the characters aren't easy to root for, especially our slacker lead. I know someone like Cooper is supposed to be identifiable as he struggles to find his way in life while making his little efforts to "stick it to the man", but when you take things too far then you end up stuck with someone you want to get away from. I usually quite like Chris Marquette, having seen him in a number of enjoyable teen movies, but I spent the entirety of this movie just reminding myself that he's usually more than just a low-budget Miles Teller.

The same can be said for the rest of the cast. Well, not the exact same, but you know what I mean. Brooke Nevin, Kinsey Packard, E. Quincy Sloan, Wesley Thompson, and co. don't get a chance to shine. The only one who comes out of this well is Ray Wise, and that's simply due to the fact that he's giving one of his familiar performances that allows him to go full Ray Wise.

Second, the script is a mess. While focusing on his smart-ass lead, Rankin forgets to keep things engaging enough in between set-pieces, fails to flesh out any of the supporting characters enough for viewers to care about them, and seems to revel in the fact that most of the people onscreen live or die thanks to no more than good or bad luck.

Of course, the second point also explains the first. I could have just said that the script undermines the whole endeavour, but I wanted to highlight the different ways it manages to damage the material. Distract from this with better comedy or gooey FX moments and it's easier to overlook, but this doesn't do that.

You do get some decent CGI throughout, considering the obvious budgetary limitations, and the lack of any full explanations for the wilder ideas ends up working in the film's favour, but this should have been an easily-enjoyable bit of fun, instead of a bit of a slog that outstays its welcome by about 15 minutes.

5/10

You can buy a disc here.
Americans can buy that same disc here.

Satanic Panic (2019)

Written by Grady Hendrix (arguably best known for his outstanding work on the wonderful Paperbacks From Hell book), Satanic Panic is the feature directorial debut from Chelsea Stardust, after a number of years directing shorts, as well as a number of various roles in the movie industry. All I can say is that I hope she is already developing her next feature, because this is an absolutely brilliant bit of entertainment, happy to take a diversion or two into some very wild territory indeed.

Hayley Griffith stars as Sam, a young woman at the start of her career as a pizza delivery driver. That start is not looking too promising. She doesn't get any tips, she ends up roped into helping customers with small tasks that shouldn't be any of her concern, and then, worst of all, she ends up the potential virgin sacrifice at the heart of a ritual being led by a ruthless and powerful coven leader (Danica Ross, played by Rebecca Romijn). Can she survive the night? And will anyone actually give her a decent tip?

With a script full of great lines of dialogue, in the form of both venomous one-line insults and amusing exchanges between characters, and a fantastic brisk pace from start to finish, Satanic Panic is a film full of easy pleasures, and a lot of laughs. Thankfully, and to the relief of many horror fans, it also delivers on the satanic part of the title. Although not ever really scary, it's nice to see something put together that feels as if equal care has been given to the moments of horror and gore in between the many chuckles. At least one set-piece has an impressive commitment to what is being shown that should make viewers squirm and wince, and the infrequent gore gags are expertly realised to show plenty of blood flowing without churning any stomachs.

It also helps that the casting here is practically perfect. Although Griffith is very likable in the lead role, and is given a great co-star to work with in the shape of Ruby Modine (who plays a young woman who was the original potential sacrifice), there is an impressively large shadow cast over the proceedings by Romijn, giving the best performance I have seen from her as a leader who has to balance the black arts with social standing, rivalries, and her own family. Arden Myrin is also a lot of fun, the number two who may hope to one day be number one, and there are great supporting turns from the likes of AJ Bowen, Jordan Ladd, Jeff Daniel Phillips, Jerry O'Connell, and others.

Although it can feel like 90% of horror film festival highlights are horror comedies (and I first heard about this after it was received very well at a number of festivals), Satanic Panic also deserves some extra brownie points for not being another of the seemingly unending comedic riffs on slasher or zombie movies. I also enjoy many of those, don't get me wrong, but it's always good to see something willing to take a path less traveled.

8/10

You can buy the movie here.

Mubi Monday: Peeping Tom (1960)

There are a number of words that can be used to describe Peeping Tom (thrilling, disturbing, intriguing), but the most appropriate one is masterpiece. Yes, I have been a fan of this film since I first saw it and nothing has ever changed my mind about that, nor do I think it ever will. Arguably much too far ahead of its time for the cinema audiences of 1960, Peeping Tom holds up today as a fascinating study of someone affected by the constant eye of an impassive camera lens looking to catch every feeling and moment, including fear and death.

Carl Boehm (or Karlheinz Böhm to give him his proper name) plays Mark Lewis, a young man we see giving in to his deadly urges from the very start of the movie. He is compelled to film women, continue filming them while killing them, and then spending a lot of his spare time watching the movie that he has made. Things get complicated, as they tend to do, when he gets close to a young woman named Helen (Anna Massey). He doesn't want to hurt her, but can he manage to restrain himself?

Written by Leo Marks and directed by Michael Powell, celebrated during his time making movies as part of the powerhouse Powell & Pressburger duo, Peeping Tom certainly has the right people behind the camera (no pun intended) to deliver a movie that handles potentially salacious and sleazy material with just the right mix of fearlessness and finesse. The cinematography by Otto Heller and music by Brian Easdale also helps, both being wonderful additions to the film.

You do get a number of set-pieces here that start off playful and teasing, before leading to the inevitably horrific finale, but everything is underscored by the fact that we know what will be coming. We are just as voyeuristic as Mark, having chosen to watch a film which then sets out to challenge that viewing choice throughout, a wonderfully complex layer over the movie that may also have put people off back when it was first released.

Boehm is superb in the central role. He's as nervy and awkward as you'd expect, at times, especially during the moments when he tries to battle against his impulses, but always more confident, and often seeming to be on some form of auto-pilot, when he is working his camera. Massey is good in the role of Helen, perhaps a little bit too sweet and innocent (although that is exactly why she has quite an effect on Boehm's character), and Maxine Audley gives a great performance as her blind mother, her condition immediately fascinating for our main character. You also get a great little role for Moira Shearer, and Jack Watson and Nigel Davenport doing excellent work as two cops after a killer.

It's a great shame that the hostile reception to this film effectively marked the end of Michael Powell's directorial career (he has a few credits after this, with his last feature film being for the Children's Film Foundation, but nothing on the same level as this, or any of his previous pictures). There's stuff here that we've seen reworked a number of times in more recent years, with characters either attracted or repelled by the age we live in, an age in which we are constantly in front of webcams, phone cams, security cameras, and so many other lenses. Some of those films are better than others, but none of them are better than Peeping Tom.

10/10

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Netflix And Chill: Selfie From Hell (2018)

Where to begin with Selfie From Hell? How angry should I allow myself to get? It is a bad film. A very bad film indeed. I thought I would say that at the very start, allowing people to skip this review if they wish, therefore helping to avoid spending more time on this film than necessary.

Hannah (Alyson Walker) is delighted to welcome her cousin Julia (Meelah Adams) for a visit, not really noticing that she seems a bit twitchy and haunted by a looming death curse. It turns out that she is being haunted by a looming death curse, one that allows a nasty demon type to come up to you whenever you take a selfie. This leads, mere minutes into the film, to Julia slipping into a comatose state. Hannah starts trying to get to the bottom of things, which leads her to the dark web, and numerous jump scares.

Written and directed by Erdal Ceylan, developed from the short movie made a few years previously, Selfie From Hell is another horror movie that signifies the very worst elements of the genre. It's not enough to dismiss this because it is aimed at teens. I know teens, I used to be one, and they're not all just after movies that use some of the words familiar to them. Teens can also have taste. And intelligence. And common sense. But you wouldn't think it from some of the worst movies marketed to them. This is a film that doesn't even get the idea of a selfie right, with one scene having a character holding up a phone to the face of someone else and making them watch the front-facing camera while they take photographs. That's NOT a selfie. That's someone holding a phone up and taking pictures of your face!!!

It would be unfair of me to spend too much time complaining about the cast. Walker and Adams aren't great, but they're at the mercy of the incompetence of Ceylan. The same could be said of Tony Giroux and Ian Butcher, one being helpful to our main character and one being a threat to her, but it's hard not to view them as doing an even worse job than the female leads. Tyler A. H. Smith is credited as "Selfieman", which tells you all you need to know about his character.

I've not even started to scratch the surface of how much is wrong with this movie. The lack of ANY logic, despite it thinking it has some. The idea of someone stumbling about the dark web and giving our personal information while they ask questions (it may happen, it may even happen as easily as it is shown here, it just doesn't feel believable at all). The plotting that just assumes viewers will accept a young woman keeping a comatose friend in her home, without requesting medical assistance immediately, while they decide to turn amateur detective. And so much more.

We all know that when someone uploads that perfect shot/selfie to Instagram, or other social media site, that there are 100 other photographs that didn't make the cut. The wrong light, the wrong angle, a blemish that was quickly hidden. This is one of those rejects. In fact, this is the movie equivalent of accidentally uploading a selfie while you were just trying to show your partner how much pain you were in while in the middle of a particularly explosive, and seemingly never-ending, bowel movement.

2/10

This disc is cheap, and yet still far too expensive.
The same disc may seem even cheaper to Americans.

Shudder Saturday: The Untamed (2016)

It's always odd, but also oddly satisfying, when a film featuring some very alien designs, and ideas, ends up making a lot of interesting points about humanity, our various relationships, and the nature of love. It happens on so many occasions, of course, with film-makers using the eyes of an outsider to coolly look on at the complex contradictions we carry around throughout our lives, but it's always a pleasant surprise.

The Untamed is another of those movies. It may not resonate in the same way as something like The Man Who Fell To Earth or Under The Skin, for example, but it certainly amounts to more than what it may seem to be at first glance, which is a film containing people who have sex with a tentacle-wriggling alien beastie.

Simone Bucio is Verónica, a young woman who . . . has sex with a tentacle-wriggling alien beastie. It lives in a barn. Verónica seems to enjoy visiting the barn. But things change when she is bitten, which means she has to go to hospital for some treatment. There she meets the handsome Fabián (Eden Villavicencio), and there may be the chance to start a relationship with someone who can have fulfil her without using tentacles. It's complicated though, because Fabián has been having a secret affair with Ángel (Jesús Meza), who is married to Alejandra (Ruth Ramos), who is Fabián's sister. You can see how things can develop from one messy situation to the next, while the alien in the barn just waits patiently for people to visit it when the urge takes them.

Directed by Amat Escalante, who also co-wrote the script with Gibrán Portela, this may seem like a bit of a departure for them when you look at previous films they have worked on, but it's actually not too far removed (especially for Portela, who wrote Juegoso Inocentes about a decade ago). The horror elements, and the sci-fi heart of things, all push snugly against very identifiable issues for the main characters. An unsatisfying marriage, people taking more risks as they try to find sexual pleasure, betrayal, and more. Take away the alien and you have something that could be a very familiar melodrama. Add it in there and you have something that's a little bit more interesting, and a lot darker.

All four of the leads are equally good, with Bucio dominating the proceedings in the first half, so intriguing as she seems intent on weaning herself away from one damaging relationship by getting herself mixed up in another that could prove damaging in a different way. Funnily enough, despite some of the plotting, this is a film that flips some cinematic gender stereotypes, with the female characters often more confident and sure in their own bodies than the male characters. That means that  Ramos becomes just as interesting to watch as Bucio, as narrative strands start to weave together, but also lends more weight to the performances of both Villavicencio and Meza than might otherwise have been the case.

More thought-provoking than you might think a film about a barn-dwelling squirmy alien that just wants to sex people up could be, this is well worth your time. As long as you're prepared to spend some time being bemused as the narrative writhes and wriggles as much as the glimpsed creature.

8/10

You can buy the movie here.

Puppet Master: The Littlest Reich (2018)

Although it absolutely perverts the essence of the characters that fans of the series have been invested in from the first movie, to varying degrees, Puppet Master: The Littlest Reich is a wonderful return to form for the series, and a fantastic way to reboot things after the tailspin of the past few years. Purists may balk at the puppets, and Toulon, now being on the side of the people they battled, and tried to stay ahead of, for so many years, but I would advise you to just get on board with the new direction and have fun. Because if this film has any purpose, it's to deliver fun.

Thomas Lennon is Edgar Easton, a man recovering at home with his parents after the end of his marriage. He finds a puppet in a box of belongings that used to belong to his younger brother, now deceased, and realises that it may be worth money. This leads to him heading along to a major auction, with a new lady by his side (Ashley, played by Jenny Pellicer), and his friend/boss Markowitz (Nelson Franklin). Unfortunately, so many of the puppets in the same place mean that things are, almost inevitably, about to get bloody and dangerous.

This is, arguably more than anything else, a reward for viewers who have stuck with the series through the many ups and downs. The script, by S. Craig Zahler, may not be as witty or smart as he possibly wanted it to be (although who knows what he was aiming for when crafting a Puppet Master script, it's not really the place to show off your best work), but that doesn't matter when the puppets go into crazy killer mode, the blood starts flowing, and everyone tries to figure out just what the hell is going on.

Directors Sonny Laguna and Tommy Wiklund, familiar to horror fans who previously enjoyed Wither and Animalistic from them, do enough to ensure that viewers know who everyone is, and where they are in relation to the carnage, even in the most hectic sequences (and there are a couple of wonderfully over the top bloodbath moments). Once the gratuitous gore and nudity appears, it then becomes a constant factor right up until the end credits, with a lot of impressive practical effects bringing the wilder script moments to life.

Lennon looks a bit out of place in the lead role, but he doesn't do a bad job. I'm just so used to enjoying his comedic performances that it felt odd to see him in the midst of this (particularly THIS series). Pellicer is a fun female co-star alongside him, and Franklin gets to play irritating, while staying just tolerable enough to make him someone you root for in the second half. Udo Kier is our Toulon this time around, and he does well with a very different portrayal of the character, Michael Paré is a cop with no time for any of the nonsense he sees around him, and both Charlyne Yi and genre favourite Barbara Crampton do well in supporting roles.

If you've made it through the previous eleven movies then you'll welcome this like a cool drink of spring water after a journey through a scorched wasteland. If you're some casual latecomer then, well done, you can jump in and enjoy this as a standalone film. And everyone who made it through every previous instalment will glare at you with an expression of judgmental resentment and anger.

7/10

You can buy the movie here.
Americans can buy it here.

Puppet Master: Axis Termination (2017)

And here we have it. I know that there is one more movie in the series, to date (that may be five more movies by the time you read this), but Puppet Master: Axis Termination tries hard to be the worst in the series. It's certainly on a par with the previous film, although it tries to distract viewers with some gratuitous nudity and gore.

I fear that attempting to describe the plot will result in me losing brain cells that I will never get back, so let me just say that a group of people are still out to stop a group of Nazis from using the puppets for their own nefarious plans. This group of people includes the character of Brooks (a tough military type played by Paul Logan, very similar to the character of Sgt Stone in the last movie) and a number of people with various supernatural abilities.

While he may do well in his role as businessman/carnival barker for Full Moon Features, Charles Band is a director who has long ago forsaken any ounce of talent and integrity for any quicker way to make a buck. Some may argue that he never had talent or integrity. Okay, I'm not entirely sure about the latter, but I'd point to the first couple of Trancers movies as evidence of the former. And I know some people still have a soft spot for Prehysteria! (which he co-directed) so we know that he once made some movies that people could enjoy. It just becomes harder and harder to remember them with each subsequent movie he helms.

The script by Roger Barron doesn't help at all, although I have to wonder just how much is developed from the fervent imagination of a writer wanting to try and use the puppets in a fun and entertaining adventure and how much is developed from the wide-eyed ramblings of Band, who probably thinks he is a one-man-idea factory, and the best person to steer this series back on to a track that he derailed it from in the first place. This is only the second script from Barron, who also wrote Trophy Heads (I cannot deny that I really want to see that), and it's clunky, ridiculous, nonsense that doesn't throw everything together in a good way.

At least the cast all do well. Wait, no, I am just kidding. The cast are almost uniformly atrocious. I may even forgive Greg Sesteros for his appalling accent in the seventh movie, it's nothing compared to the wildly uneven "Russian" accent being delivered by George Appleby, playing the good Doctor Ivan Ivanov (sheesh, even that name just smacks of utter laziness), or the . . . whatever accent that is supposed to be coming out of the mouth of Tonya Kay, one of the main Nazi villains this time around. I have enjoyed Paul Logan in a number of movie roles (nobody can kick a megapiranha in the face like he can), but he's not used properly here, placed far too often as the wisecracking cynic dragged involuntarily into a battle that utilises more magic than the guns he is more comfortable with. Nobody else is worth mentioning, because I'd rather not insult every single person involved with the movie.

Oh well, I am pretty confident that the next movie can't possibly be as bad as this one . . . can it?

2/10

There's a decent set here, for those who want the whole Axis saga.

Prime Time: The Power (1984)

Written and directed by Stephen Carpenter and Jeffrey Obrow, who had previously worked together to give slasher fans The Dorm That Dripped Blood, The Power is yet another film I had a hazy recollection of. I saw it on video and remember it being quite an intense and effective horror movie.

Once again, my memory has failed me. This is not a very good film, although it has two things going for it. One, it's an admirable attempt to try and do something a bit different at a time when every other horror movie was a slasher flick. Two, the scenes bookending the film remain surprisingly effective.

Warren Lincoln plays Jerry, a man who gets involved with a story that some teens tell him about a small Aztec doll that seems to have great power. Trying to enlist the help of journalist, and ex-girlfriend, Sandy (Susan Stoke), Jerry soon becomes possessed by the spirit of the doll, which puts everyone around him in great danger.

It's a shame that The Power doesn't ever quite work, although a few scenes deliver some effective moments. The main idea just isn't as developed as it should be, it's hard to figure out how useful the power of the doll can be while it is so drastically changing its current owner, and what could have been an enjoyably tense second half is undercut by the fact that none of the characters are worth giving a damn about (with the lone exception of Sandy).

Things also aren't helped by the overall look of the film. Perhaps seeing this cleaned up a bit would help, but for now we're left with yet another horror movie that often hides the scarier moments in scenes lit so badly that you're too busy trying to work out details when you're supposed to be tensing up in readiness for a fright.

The cast are competent, to be fair. Lisa Erickson, Chad Christian, and Ben Gilbert do perfectly okay as the younger characters who (re)discover the doll and start to figure out that something is up before handing it over to someone they think may be able to solve their unique problem. Stoke is the best one in the entire cast, which is why we give a damn about her, but Lincoln is one of the weakest, which sorely unbalances the scenes that keep them both together. It's not so bad once Jerry is being affected by the doll, but during those scenes you may be distracted by the choices made in the "evil" Jerry design.

Carpenter and Obrow have a number of credits to their name. This is close to the worst of their work (although Obrow directed Legend Of The Mummy so that proves that he can scrape closer to the bottom of the barrel than his co-worker). It's still not close to the worst of the horror movies of this time period, however. Positives include those scenes bookending the movie, some fun thrills when the Aztec doll is starting to stretch out tendrils of power, and a wonderful score from Christopher Young that feels very much like a practice run for his superb work in Hellraiser.

Would I recommend this to everyone I know? No. Would I recommend it to one or two individuals I think can enjoy this kind of schlock? Maybe. Would I buy the film if it was cleaned up and presented on a disc with a few tasty extra features? You're damn right I would.

4/10

Puppet Master X: Axis Rising (2012)

Puppet Master X: Axis Rising leads on immediately from the events of the last film. However, being directed by Charles Band, it is not concerned with actually needing to have any of the same actors in the main roles, it feels ten times cheaper, and it ends by teasing a continuing storyline that some may wish was just dropped in favour of more standalone instalments.

Danny and Beth (this time played by Kip Canyon and Jean Louise O'Sullivan) are to be recognised for their act of heroism in defeating the Nazi plot from the previous movie. Meanwhile, a Kommandant Moebius (Scott Anthony King) is eagerly awaiting on successful results from a doctor (Oto Brezina) that he has put to work on developing human corpse versions of the puppets they have managed to get their hands on.

There are some fun ideas here, mainly thanks to the script by Shane Bitterling, but everything is undermined by the cost-cutting directorial style of Band. I cannot fully hate any movie that has a scheming, busty, blonde Nazi (Stephanie Sanditz) in the mix, and the third act has some fun new puppets added to the roster, but the rest is much tougher to get through than it should be. Aside from the central cast, about eight people, it's obvious that Band didn't want to pay anyone extra if he could help it. You can get away with that if you keep every scene small and intimate. It's a bit harder to do it if you're supposed to be shooting a dinner party sequence (as happens here).

The cast are all exactly as you'd expect them to be for the budget. There are two people who don't do a terrible job, Brezina and Sanditz, with one giving a decent performance and the other most effective because of the look and manner of her icy blonde character. Canyon and O'Sullivan are worse than the actors who portrayed their characters in the previous movie, King gives the kind of pantomime Nazi performance I thought went extinct after 'Allo 'Allo! ended, and Brad Potts, playing a Sergeant who reluctantly has to "babysit" the two leads, gives the worst performance in the film, despite some strong competition.

What else is there to say? If you've read all of that and still think you may enjoy the film then you MAY enjoy the film. It has enough little pleasures to avoid being too painful. It also has sets that feel like they were thrown together to give the maximum coverage for the lowest cost (the Band way),  the character arc for Danny is pretty ridiculous, and there's a Japanese puppet added to the cast that, well, you will just have to see it for yourself. Not to mention the poorly-shot puppet fights that make the strings all too visible.

Thankfully, it looks like the eighth movie will remain the absolute low point, but this is still far removed from the quality we had at the start of the series. And I am already afraid about what the next instalment will have in store for me.

3/10

There's a decent set here, for those who want the whole Axis saga.

Mubi Monday: Pan's Labyrinth (2006)

A fairytale framed by dramatic elements, and punctuated by moments of vicious violence, Pan's Labyrinth remains the very best thing from writer-director Guillermo del Toro, despite stiff competition from the likes of Cronos, The Devil's Backbone, and The Shape Of Water.

The main character is a young girl named Ofelia (played by Ivana Baquero), who is taken along by her mother (Ariadna Gil) as they start a new life with the ruthless Captain Vidal (Sergi López). Vidal is under orders to deal with republican rebels in the local area, a job he does with no small amount of rigour and zeal, even fatally punishing people who were guilty of nothing more than hunting rabbits in the wrong area. Ofelia does not like her new stepfather, but she does like Mercedes (Maribel Verdú), a housekeeper who is helping the rebels in their efforts. She also takes a liking to escaping into some flights of fantasy, encountering a Faun (Doug Jones) that sets her a number of challenges, explaining that completing them will prove that she is the spirit of an immortal princess from the underworld.

Intelligent, tense, and beautiful throughout, Pan's Labyrinth is a moving and rewarding experience for horror movie fans. I was worried about revisiting it this time around, having not seen it for about a decade, and I could remember the basic plot elements but not exactly how they all played out, but it took me mere moments to settle into the rich and detailed onscreen world, onside with young Ofelia from her first moments.  I encourage anyone else to revisit this, especially if you have left it as long as I did.

As a cinematic world-builder, I cannot think of anyone who does that better than Del Toro, especially when it comes to his horror work. He's helped in no small measure here by Jones, who plays both the Faun and a character named the Pale Man, and some gorgeous CGI creations (insects and fairy figures), but there's not one element I can think of that feels like anything less than top-notch work.

Baquero gives a wonderful performance in the central role, at ease with the magical sights around her as she retreats further and further away from a reality that is growing bleaker and bleaker. Both Gil and Verdú work well with her, and on their own. The former is playing a character who, due to her heavily pregnant state, spends a lot of her time resting and unable to see the worst of the events unfolding around her, either unintentionally or deliberately seeming oblivious to things. The latter is a strong fighter who has to work even harder in the third act to help save the lives of those she cares for. López portrays one of the great villains of modern cinema, whether he's horrifically bashing in someone's head with a wine bottle, torturing prisoners, or trying to self-repair his own wounds. He's easy to hate, and viewers are clued into how we should feel about him from Ofelia's point of view, but also avoids being a pantomime figure. You could argue that Del Toro sometimes has more time for his villains than his heroes, but he gets the balance right here, and every character, even a local doctor (played by Álex Angulo) becomes someone you're invested in. I've already mentioned Jones. I don't want to harp on and on about him, but his performances are absolutely worth mentioning again, and he has the pleasure of being involved in the most memorable imagery tied to the film.

The script and direction are almost perfect. The only criticism, a very minor one, is that you can too easily tell one or two characters that may be dealing with Captain Vidal while also betraying him by helping the rebels. A couple of nervous movements and glances feel very obvious and unsubtle, especially compared to everything else in the film. But that is the only thing I can think of that stops this from being a perfect modern classic of cinema, and it's still not enough to actually stop it from feeling, overall, like a flawless gem.

For teenagers who have the patience, and for all adult viewers, this is a powerful enchantment. Del Toro himself is the insect/fairy who takes our hand and takes us slowly and surely into an underworld as beautiful as it is dark, reassuring us at every step that we have nothing to fear, as long as we remember everything he is telling us. It's a tale of familial love, a tale of grief, a tale of war, and a tale of tales, how we use them to process horrifying thoughts and to escape reality, even if that escape is only temporary. Even if it is our mind deceiving us while our body endures some harsh mistreatment.

10/10

You can buy the movie here.
Americans can get a great disc here.