Prime Time: Arthur The King (2024)

Based on the true story of an adventure racer who ended up with an extra member in his team, a dog he named Arthur, this is exactly the kind of film you expect it to be, although it has the added bonus of Mark Wahlberg in the lead role constantly making you think about the wonderful "Wahlberg talks to animals" sketch from SNL.

Wahlberg is Michael Light, a man who has gone his entire adventure racing career without ever getting a gold medal. In fact, his last attempt was quite the disaster, based on the fact that he pushed his team too hard without listening to the advice of others. Some years have passed since then though, and Michael wants one last shot at glory. He wants to put together a team, he needs sponsors, and he wants a win. He gets a tentative sponsor, but they insist that his team includes his old team member, Leo (Simu Liu), someone who has made the most of social media and viral marketing. His other choices end up being Chik (Ali Suliman), a man who was dropped from his last team due to a knee injury, and Olivia (Nathalie Emmanuel), a climber not necessarily wanting to make that her main discipline, but urged that way by her successful father. The race is tough, the team need to work together to overcome the usual obstacles (in the environment and in their own different approaches), but things start to improve when a stray dog starts to accompany them on their gruelling journey.

Based on the book by Mikael Lindnord, this has a screenplay by Michael Brandt (who has had huge success with a number of TV projects in recent years) and is directed by Simon Cellan Jones (who has a background in TV before a more recent move into movies, and specifically Wahlberg movies). Both do competent work, and they certainly convey the impressive distance and scale of the challenge facing the racing teams in the movie. There's one vertiginous set-piece, but it's otherwise pretty grounded and standard stuff, with those involved quite rightly banking on viewers being won over by the bond developed with the dog at the centre of the story.

Wahlberg does his usual Wahlberg stuff, although there are a couple of pleasantly surprising moments here that have his character admitting to being wearied and sometimes not the person who knows best in every situation, and Liu does a good job of keeping up alongside him and explaining how they can still do well enough for themselves even if a win evades them. Emmanuel is convincing in her part, as is Suliman, and they certainly do a great job as separate elements who can work together as an efficient and determined team. I was surprised by how much of the focus stayed on the team, thinking that Arthur would join them and have his impact noticed sooner, but, never fear, the dog (played by a canine named Ukai) is certainly made to feel like the key cast member he is when he gets more directly involved in the storyline.

Very predictable, but that's not a big deal when you're watching a true story in movie form, and surprisingly downbeat in one or two scenes, Arthur The King does enough to make it a decent enough choice for those wanting something simple and ultimately satisfying. I could rattle off a number of other "talented animal bonds with humans" movies that I prefer, but this was far from a terrible way to spend part of my evening.

6/10

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Netflix And Chill: Army Of Thieves (2021)

I know that some people rushed to see this when it first landed on Netflix, but I don't know why. A prequel spin-off from Army Of The Dead, focusing on one of the supporting characters in that film, and directed by the actor who played/still plays that character, there was nothing here that made me consider this a priority. I'm glad I finally got around to it now though, and I can tell everyone else that this is actually quite a bit better than the film that spawned it.

Matthias Schweighöfer is Ludwig Dieter, a mild-mannered man who maintains very strict order in his life while spending his spare time mastering the art of safe-cracking, in theory. He dreams of breaking in to four legendary safes, a quartet of huge devices that become increasingly difficult to break into when approached in a certain order, and he has the chance to turn his dream into a reality when he's approached by a group of criminals, helmed by Gwendoline Starr (Nathalie Emmanuel). But the chance to make his dream comes true also comes with the chance of everything turning into a nightmare.

Clocking in with a runtime of just over two hours, because of course it does, the most pleasant surprise about Army Of Thieves is how well it moves through the fairly silly plot, helped by a decent mix of characters and a few fun set-pieces. Writer Shay Hatten keeps the growing zombie threat from Army Of The Dead simmering away in the background, but sensibly focuses on this as an amusing crime caper, centred on an entertainingly nervy and ill-prepared main character.

Schweighöfer is great in the main role, making it easy to remember why his character was such a standout in the previous film. As awkward with people as he is comfortable with lock mechanisms, he's allowed to be the kind of criminal that viewers can easily root for, in it more for the challenge than any big payday, and aiming to get things done with a minimum of fuss or casualties. Emmanuel is an enjoyable screen presence, and she does well enough in her main role here, although it's hard to view her as a strong leader when the cracks in the team start to show. Stuart Martin is the mean and moody one, abd both Guz Khan and Ruby O. Fee are there to be placed in difficult positions as things become more strained. Jonathan Cohen is the determined cop who is always just one step behind, as expected, and there is an end scene that presents the expected cameos reminding everyone of where these events have been leading.

Aside from his acting onscreen, Schweighöfer also deserves some credit for his direction. This isn't his first feature, but all of his previous films have been co-directed with Torsten Künstler, which makes this his first solo outing. I'm sure he was given a lot of support and guidance by those who wanted to keep this in line with Zack Snyder's movie (and that support no doubt includes Snyder himself potentially offering some pointers), but Schweighöfer manages to deliver something that feels in line with the previous film in this series without ever being slavishly devoted to it. It's a character piece, it's a comedic crime film, it's a fun adventure. It's not a film that needs to keep reminding you of every detail and overcooked style of what preceded it.

Absolutely disposable stuff, admittedly, but I certainly enjoyed it enough while it was on. And I'd certainly be more keen to watch another film about this character than I would to watch another zombie-filled Snyder movie at this point.

6/10

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Fast X (2023)

I have mentioned it many times before, but I have a strange relationship with the Fast & Furious franchise. I was never a fan, but they became so ubiquitous that I eventually gave in and started to enjoy them. When things for more preposterous, I became less impressed. Then things got even MORE preposterous and I was won around again. I didn’t love the eighth instalment in the main series, but I really liked the ninth, so I wasn’t sure where I would land on this outing.

I hated it.

Linking back to the end of the fifth film, the plot concerns a villain named Dante (Jason Momoa). Dante is out to avenge the death of his father, and he aims to do that by hurting Dom (Vin Diesel) where he will feel it most. His FAMBLY. Of course, he hasn’t counted on Dom being the best at doing everything ever. Urgh.

Written by Justin Lin and Dan Mazeau, and directed by Louis Leterrier, this is a rambling and laughable mess for most of the runtime. The editing is horrible, genuinely feeling at times as if scenes have been randomly chopped up in the wrong places to intersperse with other scenes, ensuring no real flow or building of tension. Even the ridiculous stunts fail to impress, weighed down by CGI that somehow feels worse than what we were given in the first few movies in the series. There’s one fun sequence set in Rome, thanks to some impressive motorbike work, but the rest will have you feeling more exasperated than excited.

Diesel is the least interesting member of the main group, and when he is asked to show emotion on his face it just looks like he’s been filmed trying to empty his bowels, but the rest of the gang are unable to do much better in a number of scenes that feel like nothing but filler. Okay, John Cena is good fun in the scenes he shares with the youngest main cast member (the kid who plays “little Brian”, but watch this and tell me that we couldn’t have done without the sequence featuring a star cameo when Tyrese Gibson, Ludacris, Nathalie Emmanuel, and Sung Kang are all in London. You would be lying. The women generally fare a bit better, with Michelle Rodriguez, Charlize Theron, and Brie Larson all having some decent moments, but Jordan’s Brewster suffers from the fact that she doesn’t feel as capable as the rest of the gang, and her involvement just serves as a reminder that Paul Walker’s character is notable by his absence. Scott Eastwood returns as an agent, and an ally, Alan Ritchson is the other agent in pursuit of our heroes, and last, but not least, is Momoa. I can see some people disliking Momoa in this, he is all kinds of anarchic energy wrapped up in some damn fine threads whenever he’s onscreen, but he is the highlight of the film. His energy, his madness (a scene with him conversing with others while applying some nail varnish is THE best moment of the entire movie), his sheer glee as he watched his plan come together, it’s all a welcome change from the moody and stoic attitude of almost everyone else in the cast (hell, even the banter between Gibson and Ludacris is made more sour in this outing). It’s overdone though, and sometimes feels too much like the film-makers relied on Momoa to be a jacked-up Joker in order to make up for all of the weaknesses elsewhere in the film.

The biggest weakness, aside from the technical end result of the film-making seeming hastily put together and shoddy, is a complete lack of consequence. This feels pointless. Main characters seem to be dead, but we have seen main characters “die” before. Diesel won’t let his hero lose, his ego won’t allow it (unless things lead to a finale that can allow him to become a modern Christ figure), and the abrupt ending here, because this is only the first part of the story, feels like a bit of a slap in the face. Calling it an ending is a stretch, considering how the film really just cuts off with no defining moment for either the heroes or the villains.

Of course I will watch the next (final?) instalment in this series. I came this far with it. I won’t be looking forward to it though. Everyone involved needs to do some major repair work to get this tired and broken engine back in order if they want to cross the finish line in first place. A large fanbase will be cheering them on, but it’s all on those behind the wheel (metaphorically speaking . . . but also literally, in this instance).

4/10

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The Invitation (2022)

If you're going to update a classic horror tale, but want to keep it all feeling like an old-fashioned slice of gothic, then you could do a lot worse than watching The Invitation, where director Jessica M. Thompson and writer Blair Butler show us exactly how it should be done.

Nathalie Emmanuel plays Evie, a young American woman who finds herself in a whole new world when a DNA/family tree test leads to her discovering relatives she was previously completely unaware of. They may be distant relatives, but it gives her a chance to visit their lavish home in England, where her distant cousin, Oliver (Hugh Skinner), does his best to ensure that Evie isn't made to feel too uncomfortable. Unaccustomed to mingling with the upper-class, Evie is both intrigued and upset by what she sees around her, particularly when it comes to the way the head butler (Sean Pertwee) treats the staff, but she soon becomes much more relaxed in the company of the charming Walter (Thomas Doherty), the lord of the manor. Maybe Evie will end up making a new home in England, but she will have to deal with the skeletons in the family closet first.

There's nothing in The Invitation that will surprise, or even impress, most viewers. Every main story beat feels familiar, and the execution of the scares, and how they are doled out en route to a third act that completely clarifies everything (not that this is a complex or unpredictable plot), is in line with 101 other horror movies. That doesn't make it bad though. In fact, the wonderfully traditional visuals and witty, self-aware, script come together to create something that is, first and foremost, fun. Thompson heads up a very talented crew, considering what we see onscreen, and Butler enjoys setting up the film in a very specific way, playfully revealing key details throughout the second half, and then having all of the pieces in place for the expected rip-roaring finale.

Emmanuel is an excellent lead, and this is probably the biggest movie role I've seen her given. Here's to many more. She's a naturally captivating screen presence, and convinces here as someone who can feel like a welcome breath of fresh air in a stuffy old English manor. Doherty is as suave and charming as he needs to be, Skinner does another one of his endearing "oh gosh, nice, posh" performances, and Pertwee is enjoyably blunt in many of his exchanges with people he considers beneath his employers. Carol Ann Crawford and Tian Chaudhry get to play supporting characters who are surprisingly integral to the main plot strand, and Alana Boden and Stephanie Corneliussen are two very privileged young women who couldn't be more dissimilar in the way that they act around Evie.

I'm sure that some will be put off by the decision to fill the frame with things like unsettling stonework figures, billowing curtains, and large rooms that people are forbidden to enter, it's all a bit more Shirley Jackson than Peter Jackson, but that's what helps it stand out. This isn't another new horror movie trying to break any kind of world record for bloodshed, nor is it a film trying to use new tech as the central "demon". It's a film that takes something old, twists and plays around with it for a while, then turns it into something that feels enjoyably different. Some people may resent the core of the premise, but I thought it was both witty and entertaining.

7/10

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Last Train To Christmas (2021)

Written and directed by Julian Kemp, Last Train To Christmas is an enjoyable way to update A Christmas Carol. It mixes things up slightly by setting the tale on a train. And there’s the additional peril of the butterfly effect, as our lead character figures out that moving to the forward carriages takes him into his future while moving back takes him into his past.

Michael Sheen stars as Tony Towers, a character best described as a cross between Peter Stringfellow and Pete Waterman. About to open a number of extra new clubs, and about to celebrate his engagement to Sue (Nathalie Emmanuel). He has a strained relation with his brother, Roger (Cary Elwes), but is about to realise that it might make sense to listen to his words of caution, especially when he moves into his future and realises that his club empire is doomed to fail after he overspends and tries to expand too quickly. Attempting to fix things in the present, Tony soon figures out that he might do better to improve things by changing past decisions. And things start to go a bit wrong.

Although almost entirely set on a train, and with a fairly small central cast, Last Train To Christmas doesn’t feel small in scale, or inhibited in any way. It helps that the main characters are shown in so many different iterations (played well by a variety of actors, but Sheen and Elwes are the undeniable stars of the show) and the whole thing has a building momentum that energises the material. And, yes, keeping some money from the budget to spend on some popular, proper, Christmas hit songs also helps.

Kemp has come up with a wonderful way to mix the familiar with something a bit fresh, unafraid to take things to a very dark place (in line with the classic tale influencing it), but managing to keep viewers seeing the chance for even the smallest ray of hope. A light at the end of the train tunnel, as it were.

Sheen has a blast in his role, sporting a variety of looks that see him going from glitz to pure business, from prime ‘80s TV presenter to someone who has decided to age with the help of cosmetic surgery. Every actor portraying his character does a good job, but Sheen is the heart of the film. Elwes is equally good though, and almost unrecognizable for most of the runtime. Emmanuel is sadly underused, but as welcome as ever, and there are small roles for Katherine Kelly, Phyllis Logan, Danny Ashok, and John Thomson, as well as cameo appearances from Robin Askwith and Hayley Mills.

While the performances make the most of the material, the script deserves more praise than most Christmas movie scripts. First of all, it’s interesting to have a central character who isn’t necessarily an oblivious villain at the start. Tony Towers is egotistical and a bit selfish, but he’s no monster. Secondly, there are a number of little details that are nicely worked throughout the script to build the bigger picture, yet viewers are also asked to extrapolate whatever chain of events has changed the ripples of time as Tony moves from carriage to carriage. It’s very clever stuff.

This is a really enjoyable film to watch in the run up to Christmas. Maybe not as funny as some might expect, but it blends everything together really well. And you certainly get plenty of Michael Sheen for your money.

8/10

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Fast & Furious 9 (2021)

Although it may seem redundant to review any Fast & Furious movie at this point, that hasn't stopped me before. I have watched this series develop over the years, I have fallen out of love with it, I have revisited most of the entries and ended up enjoying them more on repeat viewings, and I have accepted that every instalment will have some car action punctuated by Vin Diesel looking moodily at people while he growls "FAMILY". I wasn't really looking forward to this instalment though. The main character being given a hitherto-unmentioned brother, the return of yet another character we thought was long dead, and some people being launched into space all seemed to point towards a blockbuster with the wrong ratio of dumb to fun, and the previous film had already given me my fill of that.

Surprisingly, I ended up thinking this was a blast. And I don't see why fans of the series would be disappointed by it.

The plot is, in a way, a bit simpler than some of the previous instalments. A group of baddies, led by Jakob Toretto (John Cena) are trying to get all of the components to something that can be assembled into an extremely powerful device. Once the data is uploaded to a satellite, the device could basically be used to hold the world hostage. Or simply give absolute power to the right bidder. Dom and co. set out to do what they do best, with the added complication of Jakob being Dom's brother, estranged due to events that are shown in various flashbacks throughout the movie (with Dom and Jakob played, respectively, by Vinnie Bennett and Finn Cole).

Is this absolutely ridiculous? Yes, but these films have been that way from the start. At their best, they are ridiculous in a way that is self-aware and laced with good humour. At their worst, they are ridiculous in between moments that we're supposed to view as completely grounded and earnest. Fast & Furious 9 leans towards the best of the series, and even has a theory being posited by one character that they may be supernaturally invincible, considering all of the mad missions that they've been on over the years. You could argue that the backstory between the Toretto brothers drags everything down, but it somehow works well, thanks to the younger actors and the way it is interwoven throughout the main narrative.

Director Justin Lin returns to the series, making this his fourth entry, and he also helps to write the script with Daniel Casey. It doesn't seem like too difficult a task. Get everyone together. Have some whacky driving antics. Be sure to visit some different locations (as biased as I am, I was able to overlook the strangely twisted geography of Edinburgh during an extended action sequence set there). Ensure that Vin Diesel is always the best at everything that needs doing well, be it fighting, driving, or impressing women. Job done. Having said that, as already mentioned above, some entries in this series even manage to falter while following such an easy formula. As small a detail as it may seem, Fast & Furious 9 actually starts with a car race sequence, and punctuates the action throughout with enough vehicular mayhem to keep petrolheads satisfied. That includes a conversation between Diesel and Helen Mirren that could easily have taken place in any environment, but takes place while Mirren is driving a fast car and evading police. Lin may not do as well with shooting the action, the editing has to work hard in some places, and it's all too, well, fast and furious to keep track of everything at times, but he and Casey create a solid foundation with the writing.

Cena is a fun addition to the cast, even if he never feels like a major threat, and everyone else slips back into their characters as if they were just putting on their favourite jackets. Diesel keeps himself at the centre of most of the biggest moments, of course, but Tyrese Gibson and Ludacris get to riff off one another again, Michelle Rodriguez and Jordana Brewster both feel a bit more involved with the action this time around, Nathalie Emmanuel returns as Ramsey, Charlize Theron returns as Cipher, with much less screentime, and you also get Sung Kang, Lucas Black, Mirren, Shea Wigham, and one or two others reprising their roles. Bennett and Cole are the main newcomers, and both do excellent work in the flashbacks, Anna Sawai is a formidable young woman named Elle, and Michael Rooker makes a welcome appearance.

The music from Brian Tyler may sound as if it is wanting to swell into The Avengers theme at points, but it generally works just fine in between some high-energy soundtrack choices, and it goes along with the constant momentum that the film has, moving from one over-the-top action beat to the next with just enough rest in between to allow characters to connect with one another and/or have some more exposition.

I have seen views from people who didn't like this, which leaves me bemused. You know what you're getting into with these movies. And if you know what you're getting into then I'd say that this absolutely delivers what fans want. The vehicles are cool, the fights are creatively staged, and there is so much fun involving large magnets that I expected Jesse Pinkman to join the crew for the third act. I'm already tentatively looking forward to the next instalment, thanks partly to a small mid-credits scene that you shouldn't miss, and I hope more people enjoy this one as much as I did.

8/10

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