Live Free Or Die Hard (2007)

AKA Die Hard 4.0.

I always quite liked this fourth Die Hard movie. It remains a big step down from the classic first film, of course, but it also remains something that looks like an action movie masterpiece when compared to the dross that would follow it. 

Apparently based on an article by John Carlin, this was developed into a movie by David Marconi and Mark Bomback, the latter receiving the main screenplay credit. It was then up to Len Wiseman to sit in the big chair and call "action", but, knowing what we know now, he was probably often guided by the instincts of the franchise star, Bruce Willis.

Willis is John McClane, of course, and we first meet him while he's once again not having a great time. He's concerned about his daughter, Lucy (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), and hopes to ensure that no young man tries to get too fresh with her. Unfortunately, his unique parenting approach is interrupted by a request to pick up and escort a hacker (Matt Farrell, played by Justin Long) who might be able to provide authorities in Washington D.C. with some valuable information about a major cyber-attack. That attack is being carried out by people working under Thomas Gabriel (Timothy Olyphant), and Gabriel is about to join the long list of people who discover that McClane can be a giant pain in the ass.

While I appreciate that this may not feel as much like a Die Hard movie as some of the other instalments in the series, I would argue that it's an enjoyable and natural progression. McClane doesn't have anyone to match him as he did in the previous film, but this time around he's in full-on protective mode when he starts to remember that the boy he's dragging around from gunfight to gunfight isn't exactly used to the full-on McClane experience. There's also his daughter to be protected, and that can be difficult and frustrating when the enemy seems so invisible and pervasive while making use of the tech that has become part of everyday life. He just needs someone to shoot and/or punch in the face, and the Die Hard films always work best when the villains are charismatic and entertaining. Thank goodness the casting director bagged Olyphant for that role.

Despite what many would view as a growing disinterest and laziness, although we now know that some of his later performances were sadly affected by aphasia what was later diagnosed as frontotemporal dementia, Willis strikes just the right balance here. McClane is very used to this kind of thing by now, but doesn't act like an indestructible superhero. Oh, he ends up doing some ridiculous things, especially in the finale, but he does them all with a shrug and an acceptance of what should be an instant shuffling off the mortal coil. Long is very good alongside him, believably wary and distressed at almost every turn, and he's a fun personality to pair up with our stoic hero. Olyphant, as he so often does, exudes a wonderful mix of charm and swagger, and even looks as if he might get away with his wild criminal plan if he just avoids making things personal with McClane. Uh oh. Maggie Q is also quite a fun baddie, Cyril Raffaelli showcases some of his physical prowess again, and you get decent little turns from Sung Kang, Cliff Curtis, and a before-their-relationship-soured Kevin Smith (okay, his turn is more fun than decent, but it's amusing to watch him work opposite Willis onscreen).

People might dismiss this because it's not on a par with some of the movies that preceded it. I think that's a bit harsh. They might dismiss it because of Len Wiseman directing. I think that's also a bit harsh. Wiseman isn't someone I would rush to defend as an unsung talent, but he had a few years when he did a perfectly good job with big stars in slick action movies (well, he had a couple of Underworld movies, this, and then it all went a bit squiffy with the Total Recall remake). This is one of those movies made during that time, and he does a decent job of trying to hold on to the essence of McClane while trying to escalate each big action sequence, and it all heads to a satisfying finale that leaves the big vehicles and tech burning in the background while the heroes and villains get up close and personal while viewers wait to hear the expected "yippee-ki-yay" punchline.

7/10

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Shudder Saturday: V/H/S/Beyond (2024)

The V/H/S movie series has been going for over a decade now. There are now seven main movies in the main series, plus one or two spin-offs. Considering that it seemed destined to end back in 2014, when V/H/S: Viral seemed to garner little more than shrugs from many viewers, it's an enduring anthology format that I am happy to see endure. Maybe now is the right time to bring it to a close though.

I'm not going to run through the cast this time around, nor am I going to provide a summary of each main tale. Suffice to say that we get six stories given an oddly polished wraparound structure, with most of the individual segments revolving around dangerous encounters with alien creatures. One tale allows Kate Siegel to direct work written by her husband, Mike Flanagan. Another tale is written and directed by brothers Christian and Justin Long, the latter clearly taking inspiration from his 2014 horror collaboration with Kevin Smith.

Clocking in at just under 2 hours, the second-longest film in the series after the first, the biggest problem here is a pervading air of laziness, as well as a lack of imagination. What was once a fun aesthetic choice, using the retro feel to provide a twist on a number of well-worn horror genre tropes, now feels like it's just the result of people filming things with a filter you could find on a multitude of apps. And that's before we get to the special effects, that often feel like AI clip art, clumsily inserted into sequences that are akin to bits of silliness people could knock together with a basic bit of tech savviness and their smart phones.

As a brand name, for better or worse, the V/H/S series was a fairly easy way to allow film-makers to have some fun while perhaps pushing against the restrictions of the found-footage form. This still allows film-makers to have some fun, but there are no longer any restrictions, which leaves viewers saddled with inferior content that is supposed to be excused by the specific stylistic choice. The first main segment in this has a score pulsating beneath the visuals, for Chrissakes (something that I guess we're just supposed to acceopt because of the framing device, which just isn't good enough). Past V/H/S segments may have had the same mis-steps, whether in the audio department or in how the camera footage is edited together, but I cannot say for sure. All I can tell you is that things feel much worse here, and if we all just sit back and accept this, because it's better than nothing, then we'll be endorsing it, and encouraging them to keep making more.

Most anthology horror movies have at least one segment that works. This has one dud after another. If more care had been taken with the first main "tape" (Stork) then I would have at least mentioned that as a highlight, but it is all undone by the extra editing and soundtrack choices that undermine it.

Not one I can recommend, in case you were in any doubt, and the absolute nadir of the series . . . so far.

3/10

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Shudder Saturday: It's A Wonderful Knife (2023)

It's a fun premise, and one that many horror fans seemed to warm to as soon as the trailer dropped. What if you made It's A Wonderful Life, but had the lead character fail to realise that her non-existence would leave a killer free to continue a murder spree that she'd managed to stop one whole year ago? That's it. And you would think that was an easy way to have a lot of fun. It turns out that you need a bit more than just that great concept though.

Jane Widdop plays Winnie Carruthers, the young woman who becomes the George Bailey of this movie. Although things have been much better for her family since she dealt with a stab-happy killer the previous Christmas, she doesn't feel that anything has gone her way. Not getting into her chosen university, not having a decent boyfriend, and not even being given a thoughtful main Christmas present from her family. So she decides to wish that she'd never been born, which puts her in a strange and darker version of the town that she grew up in. A killer seems to be building up quite the bodycount, her parents don't know who she is, her brother is dead (because she wasn't there to save him), and people are just having a really bad time of things. Winnie eventually enlists the help of Bernie (Jess McLeod), a young woman ostracised by many of her peers, and she also manages to convince her cool aunt, Gale (Katharine Isabelle), of the reality of her weird circumstances. She cannot get through to her dad (Joel McHale) though, and she cannot convince enough people that the killer may be someone they see almost every single day. Meanwhile, Mayor Henry Waters (Justin Long) is reaping many benefits, and he might not want things to go back to how they were.

Director Tyler MacIntyre has a lot of fans in the horror genre, having helmed both Patchwork and Tragedy Girls in the past decade. While both of those films have flaws, they're also good enough to have marked McIntyre out as someone to keep an eye on. This film, written by Michael Kennedy (who was a co-writer on Freaky), feels like a step back. It's surprisingly unimaginative, far too tame when it comes to the kills, and doesn't feel as if it ever fully realises the potential of the premise. There's no real sense of mystery when it comes to the identity of the killer, the "butterfly effect" of Winnie's non-existence seems to run through a tiresome check-list of the most obvious negatives, and it lacks a sense of fun for most of the runtime (if you're not going to deliver bloody kills then at least make it fun).

It also doesn't help that Widdop feels like a disappointingly weak lead. I've not seen them in anything else, not that I can remember anyway, and I'm sorry to say that they don't have much screen presense, nor do they have the right way of delivering the dialogue when it is supposed to show them being emboldened and badass. McLeod is a lot better in her role, and Isabelle is always welcome onscreen, but nobody can do enough to make up for that notable mis-step in casting. Long tries his best, helped in his performance by capped teeth and mannerisms that make him as funny as he is creepy, but his energy is offset by the far-too-laid-back performance of McHale (hey, I like the guy, he doesn't work here though).

Perhaps part of my disappointment in this stems from my enthusiasm for it. I loved the concept, and the trailer did enough to win me over. I was hoping it would be a new seasonal slasher treat, despite the fact that we're definitely not short on those recently. It wasn't to be though. I hope MacIntyre finds something better for his next project, and I hope Kennedy goes back to co-writing as he hones his craft. And while I wasn't a fan of Widdop here, I am glad to have been introduced to McLeod, who seems to have built up a hefty filmography so far mostly full of shorts and TV work. I look forward to seeing her in more features in the years ahead.

The film may not be wonderful, but I can't dismiss it as awful either. It gets a bonus point for the title alone.

5/10

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Barbarian (2022)

Written and directed by Zach Cregger, Barbarian is an excellent horror film that may put off many viewers with a structure that almost places it in the category of anthology movie. Jumping between various points in time, and various main characters, the first viewing may leave you feeling a bit bewildered until everything starts to knit together, but stick with it and you will be rewarded with a very dark and twisted piece of work.

Things start with Tess (Georgina Campbell) turning up to stay at a house she has rented, only to find that the property has also been rented to someone else by mistake. That person is Keith (Bill Skarsgård). He seems lovely and considerate, but he also brings the baggage of being Bill Skarsgård, and this whole section has Cregger using lighting and camera angles to keep viewers as wary as Tess. Once this episode plays out, we then join AJ (Justin Long), a cocky actor who finds out that his career is about to suffer from an accusation of rape. Desperately pooling his money and resources for the legal battles ahead, AJ travels to a property that he has had an agency renting out on his behalf. Yep, it’s the house that Tess and Keith stayed in. The neighbourhood seems to have gone to pot, but AJ’s house could still have some value. One more jump back in time shows us a previous resident of the house (played by Richard Brake) and then it is time to connect everything together for an intense and entertaining final act.

Mixing a number of familiar horror movie standards into something that feels new and bang up to date, Cregger proves himself a smart and confident helmsman with Barbarian. You get tension, scares, and some great gore moments, but you also get thought-provoking commentary on gentrification, class division, abuse, and the danger in the world around us that just keeps encroaching on any lone female. None of this stuff brings the film to a halt, and the fact that it’s all woven so well through the script is testament to Cregger’s talent, although his cast also help with pitch-perfect performances.

Campbell is a very likable lead, and viewers are on her side as soon as things start to feel tense (which happens within the first few minutes). Skarsgård is also very likable here, his manner and thoughtfulness at odds with the threat we perceive in him, which is how Tess perceives him. Then you have Long, delivering a brash and unpleasant turn that has you rooting for his character to meet a sticky end. Although he isn’t a good person, he is there to provide a very interesting juxtaposition and comparison point with someone even worse (Brake, doing well with his short amount of screentime).

It’s hard to write about this while preserving the element of surprise. Those who have already seen the film will know the elephant in the room that I haven’t tried to describe. Those yet to see the film may not be convinced by my selective summary, but I hope you give it a go and enjoy a surprise or two. There are a couple of moments here that sit quite high on any list of great moments from horror movies released within the last few years, and Cregger paces everything perfectly as viewers are moved between gruelling moments of unpleasantness and more entertaining bits of horror movie “fun”. Absolutely brilliant stuff.

8/10

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Tusk (2014)

Tusk is a strange beast, no pun intended (considering the content of the film). A highly flawed, uneven film that many will find impossible to like, it shows writer-director Kevin Smith continuing to develop and highlight his darker side. Many of his comedies had black humour in them, of course, but it was Red State that really let him dip his toes into something approaching horror. Tusk, at least on the surface, does the same. But the fact that it's actually a comedy makes it a tough one to easily recommend.

Let's get the basic storyline out of the way. Justin Long plays a podcaster named Wallace Bryton. Wallace and his friend,Teddy (Haley Joel Osment), use their airtime to look at clips on the internet of people who have gone viral, mainly through stupidity but sometimes because of certain strange characteristics. Wallace is always after the next big thing with which to shock and impress his audience, which takes him to the home of an old man (Michael Parks) who assures him that he has a story or two to tell. He does indeed have some stories. But his most interesting one hasn't been completed yet, and it may well involve Wallace.

Based on an idea that came about during Smith's own podcast (SModcast), and featuring a number of ideas and even lines of dialogue pre-approved by his fanbase, you'd be forgiven for wondering if Tusk was a franken-film. It certainly feels, at times, like a number of disconnected scenes thrown together with little thought given to the central storyline. Yet it also has a pretty obvious message underlying most of the content, so writing it off as nothing more than an easy fan-pleaser is probably doing it a bit of a disservice. It's also worth noting that every moment that doesn't quite work, every comedic beat that feels too weird, every wild image pushing the film further into dark absurdity, it all shows a confident (or brave . . . . . or foolish) director in the hot seat.

Long isn't at his best here, but he's not too bad. His characters is supposed to be mildly irritating, at best, and he is. Parks is the star turn, reeling off tales that range from the sublime to the ridiculous with equal ease and aplomb. Osment and Genesis Rodriguez both do well in supporting roles, with the latter playing the girlfriend of Long's character, and there's a performance from Johnny Depp to add to another list of his kooky performances. It's that performance, if anything, that should clue viewers in to the fact that this is a pitch black comedy. Although if you don't get it by that point then you've just not been paying attention.

Anyone expecting another piece of nastiness like The Human Centipede (First Sequence) should content themselves by instead renting The Human Centipede: Full Sequence. This is a film aimed more at people who start to grunt and mutter as soon as they hear of yet another internet "celebrity" with no obvious talent. It's not one I'd rush to revisit, but it's certainly an interesting curio.

6/10

http://www.amazon.com/Tusk-Blu-ray-Michael-Parks/dp/B00NX8RUZE/ref=sr_1_2?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1418819387&sr=1-2&keywords=tusk

Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (2004)

This review is going here because, well, I wanted to start off the new year with a smile on my face.

As simple as it is gut-bustingly funny, Dodgeball is a near-perfect mix of great one-liners and physical comedy, populated by a cast all playing to their strengths and directed with sharp focus on moving from one comedy beat to the next.

Vince Vaughn plays Peter La Fleur, owner of Average Joe's gym. La Fleur is a nice guy, but a terrible businessman. When he's given a very short time in which to come up with a very large sum of money it looks like Average Joe's is about to close. Which is good news for White Goodman (Ben Stiller), the narcissistic, dense, mean owner of Globo-Gym (slogan: "We're better than you, and we know it").
There may, however, be a way to raise the money and save Average Joe's. Yep, you guessed it. Dodgeball. There's a big tournament about to happen, and the prize money is just the exact amount that La Fleur needs to save the gym.

Written and directed by Rawson Marshall Thurber, who would score another big comedy hit almost ten years later with We're The Millers, this is very much a love or hate movie, and I love it. In fact, it's one of those movies that I love so much that I just hope many of my friends also love it, otherwise I start to question their taste, and then question the basis of our friendship, and then question by questioning manner, and then just collapse into a heap of paranoia and low self-esteem.

Vaughn is a fast-talking average Joe (almost literally, in this case), Stiller is the angry idiot, Justin Long is a good-hearted klutz, Stephen Root is someone who builds and builds up his anger until he explodes, Joel David Moore is a socially awkward bundle of nerves and, well, I guess you get the picture. What I'm emphasising here with my description of each character is that this is not a film to watch if you do not like any of these actors doing their usual stuff. Christine Taylor is very good as the attractive young woman who La Fleur takes a shine to, Rip Torn is hilarious as a violent dodgeball coach, and there are great cameos from the likes of David Hasslehoff, William Shatner, Hank Azaria, Lance Armstrong (although his cameo isn't as funny now as it once was) and even Chuck Norris. Gary Cole and Jason Bateman are to commentators with distinctly different styles, and Missi Pyle is the most dangerous woman in the world with a dodgeball.

Is it a modern comedy classic? Most people would probably say that it isn't, but Dodgeball has a better laugh-per-minute ratio than almost any other comedy I can think of since the turn of the 21st century. It's the perfect blend of clever and dumb, with an extra sprinkling of . . . . . . . . even more dumb, and I certainly rank it up there with many other comedy greats. It might not be perfect, but it comes close.

And the sequence that pops up during the end credits may not be big or clever, but it's yet another moment that makes me burst out laughing, ensuring that the smile stays on my face for some time after the movie has finished.

9/10

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Idiocracy (2006)

Another comedy written (with a helping hand from Etan Cohen) and directed by Mike Judge, Idiocracy is another out and out winner that once again shows how Judge seems to easily and unnervingly get to the heart of what elements in our society are so soul-sapping and painful that laughing AT them is the only way to stay sane.

This time around he's looking at the dumbing down of our culture and the whole world. In fact, the downward spiral of the world's IQ is put forward with horribly believable rationale and Idiocracy scores major points by mixing the absurd and hilarious with the prescient and scarily believable.

Luke Wilson stars as Joe Bauers, a completely "average Joe". He's in the military, coasting along, and happy with his lot in life. Everything changes when he's chosen for an experiment that will see him frozen in hibernation for some time and then reanimated. His fellow test subject is Rita (Maya Rudolph), a prostitute, and the two are nervous as the hibernation tanks close around them. 500 years later, after being forgotten about and left under rubbish and rubble, a freak accident releases the sleeping duo and they wander around to find themselves on a planet that can barely spell IQ. Joe is now the smartest man on Earth but that doesn't mean that he'll avoid getting himself in trouble.

Luke Wilson and Maya Rudolph are great fun in the lead roles while Dax Shepard, Terry Crews, Sara Rue, Stephen Root and Thomas Haden Church are among the cast members having a ball acting dumber than a bag of hammers.

The script is very funny, very funny indeed - mixing the superdumb with the subversive and clever - and great scene follows great scene. However, the main premise keeps the movie down ever so slightly. Call me a naive optimist but I like to think that the human race wouldn't become quite THAT stupid, even if the evidence seems to pile up every day to try and prove me wrong. The movie is a farce, albeit a superb farce full of numerous, individual, laugh out loud moments.

Mike Judge is one of the best comedy directors in modern cinema. He's smart, very observant and, most importantly (of course), damn funny. If you haven't found that out for yourself yet then I urge you to check out any of his movies as soon as possible.

7/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Idiocracy-DVD-Luke-Wilson/dp/B000N3T2CQ/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1343571965&sr=8-1