Thursday, 26 September 2013

Children Of The Corn V: Fields Of Terror (1998)

There's surely an easy answer, but I can't think of a horror movie franchise that overstayed its welcome as quickly as the Children Of The Corn franchise. The second movie may have been the worst of the lot, so far, but no instalment beyond the first movie seems to be able to claw its way up to the level of average. They stink. Children Of The Corn V: Fields Of Terror does nothing to make me think that there's light at the end of this particular tunnel.

The story goes like this: a bunch of teenagers find themselves in a small town named Divinity Falls. They upset some evil children who live in the area and are given a week to leave. Unfortunately, their car is put out of action so leaving becomes a bit of a problem. There's a man (David Carradine) in the area who leads the children, acting as the physical embodiment of He Who Walks Behind The Rows, and one of the teenagers suddenly realises that her brother should number among his young followers. She sets out to meet, and perhaps save, him and then things start to get more dangerous.

Written and directed by Ethan Wiley, this particular instalment of "The Fields Have Ears" is notable for the inclusion of David Carradine, Fred Williamson and a rather naive Eva Mendes (who somehow managed to get her career on track after appearing in nonsense like this and Urban Legends: Final Cut). They may not have the MAIN roles - Stacy Galina is the main gal and her brother, Jacob, is played by Dave Buzzotta - but they get a decent amount of screentime. Kane Hodder gets one enjoyable scene, and Alexis Arquette is the other recognisable face to be dragged through the rows.

The acting isn't so bad that it causes an eye-watering stench, but it's impossible for anyone onscreen to improve the stodgy material they have to work with. The script is stupid and unimaginative, and the direction does nothing to cover up its weaknesses. But if, like me, you've endured the previous movies to get to this one then you already know what to expect.

The REALLY good news? If you've made it this far then there are only a few movies left to endure before you can be well and truly done with the franchise.


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