Prime Time: Bats (2021)

If co-directors Scott Jeffrey and Rebecca Matthews ever read this review then they may go through a bit of a rollercoaster ride as I discuss their movie. Because Bats is bad, I cannot dance around that fact, but it is bad in ways that put it ahead of many other low-budget British horror movies released in the last decade or so. I wasn’t going to review it, not wanting to dump on a film that at least tried to do something a bit different, but then I decided that it was only fair to show how much difference it can make to watch something that feels as if those making it were actually making some effort, as opposed to something like Deinfluencer (which I highlighted as a stinker last week).

Things start with some young folk having sexy times in an abandoned house. It isn’t long until they are endangered by a big bat type creature, which is a mutated, humanoid, monster that had been living in the upper areas of the house for some time. The mutation was probably caused by a nearby nuclear plant meltdown, ironic with the house being based in Nosferatu Village (not a joke, that is the name of the place). We then join some other people, a family processing a number of big changes in their lives, as they head to that same house, which is actually their family home.

There are so many decisions made here that seem odd, yet also understandable. The film is apparently set in the mid-1980s, something that isn’t really used in the plot, but perhaps allows the film-makers to be able to avoid things like mobile phones and other useful modern gadgets. It’s also meant to star a bunch of Americans, I think, but the accents veer around in all different directions. I assume this is to help make the movie a bit easier to market, in theory, but all it does is have Americans wonder why their accents are being mangled while Brits wonder, well, why accents are being mangled.

Scott Jeffrey wrote the script, alongside his co-directing duties, and that’s also a mess, as you might have guessed already. But it’s a mess that at least comes close to having some more interesting moments here and there. The film-makers ultimately fumble the execution of the material, but it’s admirable to see them try adding weight to what could have been just a standard, cheap ‘n’ lazy, monster movie.

While I wouldn’t always think to namecheck the makeup department, Stephanie Harrison (assisted by Charlotte Wright and Jamie McGee) does well in trying to bring the vision of the directors to the screen. The main creature might have been more effective if kept in the shadows, but fair play to everyone involved for deciding to show off their work instead. And there’s a surprisingly decent gore gag that shows the painful effects of being the target of the bat’s “vocal weaponry”.

As for the cast, I am not going to list everyone here. Most of them failed to impress me, and I am not writing this to just sling some insults their way, but Megan Purvis is a big plus for the film, and does a great job in the lead role, accent notwithstanding. I have seen Purvis in one or two other movies, and it was her name heading up the cast list here that made me consider this for my viewing schedule this week. People need to start making better use of her talent, because she’s been much better than most of the movies she has starred in over the past few years.

Is Bats good? No. Is it at least schlocky fun? Also no. It’s not necessarily trying to be though, and that is why I ultimately feel more positive about it than I would about any of the hundreds of cheap cash-ins that would have taken this title and gone for the easier options. While it doesn’t really work, Bats tries to be a solid horror with some psychological drama, and commentary on grief and what it takes to move past that. Once the weaker supporting characters are out of the picture, leaving the film to focus mainly on Purvis and a large bat stalking her, it improves immensely. Not enough to be considered a good film, but enough to be considered as something not actually that bad.

4/10

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Prime Time: Pet Graveyard (2019)

Since finishing this movie, her feature debut, Rebecca Matthews has churned out about another half dozen in the past year, some due out in 2020 and some due out next year. You have to admire her work ethic. Momentarily. When you realise that most of them could end up like this one though, well, your opinion could change.

I saw the poster for Pet Graveyard a year or so ago and thought that it was obviously a rip-off of Pet Sematary. It definitely uses that film to sell itself anyway, but the plot is more in line with Flatliners, if Flatliners was written by someone who could barely knit a plot together. 

Jessica O'Toole is Lily, a young woman studying to be a nurse. She is roped into a scheme by her brother, Jeff (David Cotter), to help him gain more traffic on his vlog. Jeff plans to "brink" with Francis (Hindolo Koroma) and Zara (Rita Siddiqui). Brinking is when you die for a few minutes, allowing you time to catch up with someone special on the other side. It obviously doesn't go according to plan, with the trio bringing back another presence. Because once you die you cannot come back. The race is then on to beat the reaper figure that is going to kill them off. And you get clumsily-inserted shots of a cat, with eyes made to glow red occasionally.

Sadly, there's nobody working on this film that I can say good things about. I'm sorry. Hey, more power to them if they got a decent payday out of it and another title to add to their filmography. This is one of many small independent UK horrors in recent years to ride the coat-tails of a blockbuster hit and deliver a final result that is depressingly cheap and inept. It would seem that we only have three main categories of British horrors being made nowadays: the gems, the "mockbusters", and a dozen annual selections with the word Krampus in the title.

Matthews shows no style or imagination in her direction, and the scenes on the other side are simply people who seem to be on a black-painted stage. Gore gags are generally awful, there's absolutely no tension, or sense of actual horror, created, and the plotting is quite laughable throughout.

A lot of this is down to the script, by Suzy Spade, which forgets to include anything decent, from the characters to logical progression of the situation. Scares are just not present, and the attempts to instead focus on some of the emotional consequences of playing around with death are cringe-inducing.

O'Toole, Cotter, Koroma, and Siddiqui are not very good, which means I won't spend extra time here being insulting to them. Kate Milner Evans does a bit better, portraying the deceased mother of the two leads, and someone who gets to have the most fun in the third act.

I knew this wasn't going to be good. I hoped I would have some fun with it anyway. That proved difficult. I'll rate it generously, for a minimum degree of competence in certain areas, but don't let that fool you. This is definitely one to avoid, and I'm going to assume that many of the other films churned out by Matthews will be aiming for the same low bar. Which won't stop me checking them out. Eventually.

3/10

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