Rocky II (1979)

Although this was a major step in turning Sylvester Stallone into the '80s icon that he would become, Rocky II sees the star still some short distance away from being fully-formed at the end of the 1970s. While tough and strong, Rocky Balboa is far from the sculpted man-mountain he would become in later instalments, and there's still more time for character development and relationship moments that help to make Rocky more than just the standard "action hero" seen in so many other Stallone vehicles.

Set in the immediate aftermath of the first film (with the opening scenes replaying that fight between Rocky and Apollo Creed), this shows our main character dealing with his new-found success, trying to make the best of things, and considering how to make the most of his boxing reputation without having to dive straight back into the ring. Apollo, on the other hand, is being mocked and insulted by those who believe he received a hiding from someone who never should have been allowed to go the distance with him. There has to be a rematch, but that means that Rocky needs to learn a few new tricks. Meanwhile, he's very happy to be starting a family with Adrian (Talia Shire), but Adrian knows that she'll eventually have to see him fight again.

Once again written by Stallone, who also decided to direct this time around, this is a full and engaging character piece that stands toe to toe with the original. It continues the story of Rocky in a way that doesn't feel like a complete retread, although it ultimately ends up in the same place, but looking at it in hindsight, knowing what comes along after it, makes it easy to see the different parts of the formula falling into place.

Stallone is once again very good in front of the camera, remaining a gentle giant who is often held back by himself more than those directly around him. Shire gets to do a bit more than just be timid and quiet, developing her character into the motivating and supportive partner she would remain for the rest of the series, whether for or against whatever upcoming boxing match looms ahead. Carl Weathers is still a crackling and very worthwhile antagonist, his fighter desperate to reclaim his reputation while also admiring the strength and grit of his opponent. Burt Young pops his head into enough scenes to keep his character a part of the core group, Burgess Meredith still does wonderful work as Rocky's trainer, Mickey, and both Tony Burton and Joe Spinell once again do enough in their brief moments of screentime to make a good impression.

It may not be distilled to the purity of what we think of now when we think of this franchise, but the iconic theme plays often enough, there's a training montage, the final act is all about the big fight, and this nicely ends one story arc that is then reworked to form a strong throughline that would hold together the very best of the later instalments. 

8/10

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Prime Time: Rocky (1976)

It is interesting to rewatch Rocky for the first time in decades and consider a number of things you might have forgotten. It’s also equally interesting to even contemplate reviewing it in the 21st century. I mean . . . who needs another review of Rocky at this point? Nobody. But here I am anyway. 

The story of a boxer (Rocky Marciano AKA The Italian Stallion, played by Sylvester Stallone) who seems to have missed any shot at glory, Rocky is a boxing film that features a surprisingly small amount of boxing. It’s crucial to the tale, and to the character, but this is just as much a character study as it is a rousing sports movie.

While watching Rocky this time around, I really couldn’t be certain that I had ever actually watched the whole film before. I would have been very young when first checking it out, and it isn’t as simplistic, or as focused on the training and fights, as some of the later movies in the series. It’s now impossible for me to know if I had ever watched the whole thing, however, because Rocky is a massive part of pop culture. You know how Stallone speaks. You know the main theme (music by Bill Conti). You know that a battered and tired Rocky shouts “Adriaaaaaaaaan” when he wants his partner beside him at the end of a fight. These are all things that are locked in to my brain, just as some of the main supporting players are. 

The story of Stallone holding out to get a deal in which he could star in the film he wrote for himself is the stuff of legend nowadays, a modern Hollywood fairytale in sync with the film itself, but can you remember who actually directed this? It was John G. Avildsen (who would also strike big with The Karate Kid, but seems destined to be overshadowed by the iconic characters he placed onscreen in professional fights).

Stallone is excellent in the lead role, although (and it seems weird to say this) it’s strange to see him looking much closer to someone with a normal physique than the super-ripped and muscular form he started to build from the 1980s all the way through to now. He definitely hits the perfect note here though, a fighter in the ring who just wants life outside the ring to be a bit better for himself and everyone he knows. Talia Shire is  very sweet as the super-shy Adrian, while Burt Young is alternately amusing and annoying as her insensitive brother, Paulie. Burgess Meredith is great fun as Mickey, the trainer who dismisses Rocky until he gets his unexpected chance at the big time, and Carl Weathers is brilliant as Apollo Creed, the boxer supplying that chance. Unlike so many other opponents in the series, Apollo isn’t depicted as a big villain, and the series would benefit enormously from this decision. There are also good little moments for Joe Spinell (as a local crime boss who employs Rocky as a debt collector) and Tony Burton (as Apollo’s corner man/assistant).

I realise that I have spent all of this time telling you plenty that you already know. Like myself, most people have either seen this film or know enough about it to feel like they have seen it. There are still some surprises to be savoured though, especially if you haven’t checked this out in years, and the film wins viewers over with little details and sweet moments that lay the foundation for the hugely successful franchise it would become. This isn’t perfect, far from it, and anyone seeking something in line with the more formulaic sports movies that are so often described as “Rocky mixed with [insert sport here]” may be disappointed, but it’s full of heart, and often full of an innocence that you only truly appreciate when you realise that it’s the vital ingredient missing from some of the mis-steps in the later instalments.

Maybe not a knockout, but it still manages to stand upright against the barrage of jabs that may come from a modern critique. 

8/10

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American Warships (2012)

Well, I never thought I would do this but let's start this review by linking to a Daily Mail article here (you don't know how dirty and violated that makes me feel but it's necessary). That article details the sad story behind the name change for this film, another "mockbuster" from The Asylum that was originally slated to be released as American Battleship. Now, while I appreciate that many people hate The Asylum and can't even begin to understand why I tolerate their movies I can also appreciate these two facts:

1) The most common complaint levelled against The Asylum is a lack of originality. They're just copying the big, upcoming releases and trying to cynically cash in on big names. This is often very true. They do copy successful formulae and try to make as much money as possible before anyone cottons on to the fact that their film might be rubbish. And here's the thing about that - it's the exact same thing that Hollywood does every single week of the year. They may not be quite so upfront about it but does that make their moneymaking endeavours any closer to having artistic integrity? No, not at all. ARTISTS in Hollywood CAN have artistic integrity, of course, but I am talking about the big picture of the whole Hollywood game. The fact that Universal were worried by a small movie that looked to ride on the coat-tails of a blockbuster based on a boardgame is ever so slightly sad. One film is pretty much as unoriginal as the other so, to paraphrase that old AvP tagline - whoever wins . . . . . . . . audiences lose.

2) The word battleship is a word to describe a big ship that can take part in a battle. I'm pretty sure that the word existed before the game came along. Now, fair enough, if The Asylum tried to release American Hasbro Battleship I could see that being a problem but they didn't. They used A word that was shared by a big, recent release. If I wanted to write and develop a movie called Battleship Bomber I don't see any reason why that would be a problem. Or even writing and developing a film called British Battleship. I'm not denying that the content is another issue altogether, all I'm saying is that whatever Universal wanted from The Asylum a title change should not have been on the cards.

Anyway, after upsetting a number of people with those views, let me get on with the review.

American Warships is about a big BATTLESHIP* that finds itself warring against an invisible opponent. Other countries are suspected of starting hostilities and the world may end up on the brink of nuclear war but the only thing concerning the crew of the BATTLESHIP* is defeating the enemy before they are themselves destroyed.

Written and directed by Thunder Levin (which is one of the greatest names I have ever heard in my entire life - I now wish I had called my kids Thunder, Lightning and Hail), American Waships is a diverting enough piece of hokum. The main premise is completely ridiculous, of course, but then the same thing could be said of many other movies out there at your local multiplex (with hundreds of millions of dollars thrown at them). At least this film has a nice, but completely random, THX-1138 reference in the mix.

The special effects aren't so special but, overall, they do the job required when it comes to scenes featuring a BATTLESHIP* shooting at an unseen enemy. There are a few moments that are eye-searingly awful (a bunch of Navy SEALs trying to board the invisible craft ranks is laughably bad and looks like it was put together with a photobooth app) but it's generally a huge improvement over the cheap wire-frame Amiga 32-created models that The Asylum tend to put onscreen.

The cast aren't all that bad either. Mario Van Peebles is the man in charge of the BATTLESHIP*  and there's also a small role for the great Carl Weathers. It helps that Johanna Watts is absolutely gorgeous to look at while playing Lieutenant Bradley and the supporting players include Nikki McCauley as a bit of a brainy type who may just be able to come up with some alternative solutions to defeat the enemy and a bunch of disposable men playing . . . . . . . . . disposable men.

It's not a movie that you'll want to rush out and buy (films from The Asylum rarely are) but if you're attracted to the dumb premise then you should find enough here to keep you entertained from start to finish. Especially if you're a fan of BATTLESHIPS*.

 5/10

*The word BATTLESHIP/S is being used in this review simply as a descriptive word and not in any way relating to the trademarked boardgame.

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