Prime Time: Castle Freak (2020)

I'm not going to try to tell you that the original Castle Freak was any kind of classic. Nor am I going to try and tell you that it was tasteful and full of effective scares. It was a fun time though, helped by performances from a couple of well-known leads and the fine directorial instincts of Stuart Gordon. This remake, in comparison, is a bit shambolic.

Rebecca (Clair Catherine) and John (Jake Horowitz) are the young couple who move into the castle with a dark secret. Rebecca is blind, John is struggling to live a clean life. Their relationship is strained, and it's about to be strained further by the secrets contained within the castle. Some other people join our leads, a creature creeps around and kills some of them, and the whole thing leads to a very silly finale, and tiresome post-credits sting that references another Gordon horror movie.

This is only the second feature from director Tate Steinsiek, who has spent years working in the art and special effects departments. The lack of experience shines through, with almost every scene highlighting the low budget and the weak cast. Unsurprisingly, there are some decent effects here and there, to be expected from someone who knows that side of things so well, but I defy anyone to watch this and actually care about any of the characters or the storyline.

Kathy Charles may or may not have been pleased to have this as her first feature writing credit (she would do much better in collaboration with others on her next project, Jakob's Wife), but this feels like more of an assignment than any passion project. Every item on the list must be checked off (Lovecraft references - check, gratuitous nudity - check, clumsy exposition - check, people being oblivious to the real danger until it's ready to disembowel them - check, etc) and it would be laughable if it didn't feel so lazy.

Neither Catherine nor Horowitz do a very good job, sadly, and there's nobody else to help distract from their relatively poor performances. Emily Sweet seems to be there for her willingness to be involved in the main nude scene, Chris Galust is frankly appalling in a role that was crying out to be performed by a genre legend cameo, and the only other person I want to mention is Kika Magalhães, who at least tries her best to carry the movie with the many scenes revolving around her character.

It just goes to show you that people can make very different things with the same sets of ingredients. Some may view this and think it's on a par with the original film, considering how schlocky and grubby that one seemed at times. Others, like myself, will simply point to it as a prime example of what happens when you provide a fairly low budget to people who don't have the experience to rise above it. 

3/10

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Shudder Saturday: Castle Freak (1995)

In a stroke of typical bad luck for characters who may not realise they are in a horror movie, Castle Freak shows a family unit inheriting a spacious castle that happens to house a dangerous creature inside, hence the title. The family aren't in the happiest place to start with, and things may get a lot worse as the full horror of their situation becomes apparent.

Directed by Stuart Gordon, who once again decided to work with Dennis Paoli on a loose adaptation of a story from H. P. Lovecraft (a well they revisited, with varying degrees of success, numerous times throughout their careers), Castle Freak may not be the best work from all those involved, both cast and crew, but it's a wonderfully unpretentious and nasty little horror movie.

Jeffrey Combs and Barbara Crampton play John and Susan Reilly, temporarily moving into the castle with their blind daughter, Rebecca (Jessica Dollarhide), and the backstory delivered shows that John caused a car accident, while drunk, that caused Rebecca's blindness. That would be bad enough in itself, but Susan cannot forgive her husband for also causing the death of their son in the same accident. John is trying to stay sober now, obviously, but it might be too late for him to make a change that will change how his wife views him. Meanwhile, the creature that was once being secretly cared for in the castle is about to start making noises in the night that put the new occupants on edge, And it's getting hungry.

Moving between old-fashioned standard horror (dark castle corridors, rattling chains, unknown sounds occurring at night), blood-drenched nastiness (there are one or two bodies that eventually get munched on by the hungry creature), and entertaining melodrama (Combs struggles to maintain sobriety until he opts to fall off the wagon with a vengeance), Castle Freak is a strange blend of elements that somehow all works, mainly thanks to the safe hands of Gordon and Paoli. Both men know how to get just the right tone in the horror works that they also mine for humour, and they're helped by a couple of genre stars who can deliver exactly what is asked of them.

Combs is the star who gets to have the most fun here, whether he is being rebuffed by his wife or getting himself as drunk as possible at a local bar, and he has a number of entertaining confrontations, be it with the local police, a prostitute, or the dangerous presence viewers know will eventually show itself to everyone in the third act. Crampton, as much as I love her, has much less to do, but she still feels right in the role (perhaps because she pairs up so well with Combs, perhaps because she's just a genuinely great scream queen when the time comes for her to be placed in peril). Dollarhide does okay, and Elisabeth Kaza plays a maid, Agnese, who occasionally has more than a slight air of Frau Blücher (*insert horse whinny sound here*) about her. It's also vital to mention Jonathan Fuller, playing Giorgio AKA the creature, who gives an excellent physical performance under a hefty amount of makeup.

If you're a fan of Stuart Gordon, especially if you have enjoyed his other films starring Combs and Crampton, then you should find a lot to enjoy here. It's not on the same level as his best work, but it's still worth your time, especially when things start to get ramped up in the second half.

7/10

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