Prime Time: Shelby Oaks (2025)

Some people really enjoyed this movie, and I myself have somehow watched it three times already, but I am not a big fan. Starting off seeming like one thing, format-wise, before turning into something very different, and highly derivative, Shelby Oaks is one of the weaker slick horror movies I have seen throughout the past year.

Camille Sullivan plays Mia, a woman who is obsessed with finding out what happened to her missing sister, Riley (Sarah Durn). Riley was part of a group of YouTube paranormal investigators, which made me care very little about her fate anyway (but that's just me), and the easily-solved mysterious circumstances of their disappearance seem to lead Mia, as the title suggests, to Shelby Oaks.

Another person who made their initial connection to audiences via YouTube, director Chris Stuckmann (who also co-wrote the screenplay with his wife, Samantha Elizabeth) positions himself here as a prime example of why we shouldn't necessarily be expecting great things from everyone who has grown up with that platform and advanced level of tech-savviness. Shelby Oaks isn't an incompetent film, not by a long shot, but it's so tiresomely unoriginal and simplistic that it highlights what happens when you have someone wanting to blend their many influences without being able to add enough creative spark to the mix.

Sullivan does a good job in her role, thankfully (considering how much of the film remains very focused on her), but nobody else gets to make a strong impression. Brendan Sexton III is "the husband", and that's the sum total of his character, Charlie Talbert plays obvious pawn in the ongoing chess game between our main character and whatever she is due to encounter, Keith David appears in a role that does little more than allow horror movie fans to say "yes, Keith David", and Robin Bartlett plays someone who feels as if they've wandered in from a Resident Evil storyline. Durn doesn't get enough good stuff to sink her teeth into, sadly, and that's a real shame. Taking us on the journey alongside her would have been better than constructing a narrative that has to spend far too much time trying to ensure that viewers don't notice the blindingly obvious clues laid out like a set of super-sized arrows pointing in one direction.

I started this review by mentioning that I have watched this three times already. There won't be a fourth, unless someone forces me into a rewatch for some godforsaken reason.  The reason I had to watch this multiple times is simply because I kept forgetting to write up a review for it and there was not enough here that managed to stick in my memory. At all. Even the final moment, which is clearly something that Stuckmann and Elizabeth were very pleased with.

I don't want to end on a negative though, especially after reading what Stuckmann has said about his changing approach to film criticism now that he's been able to get more insights into productions and what can go into making any feature. It's admirable that he's put his money where his mouth is, as it were, and it's more than I would manage. There's enough here to show potential, especially considering the fairly low budget, and I think Stuckmann could do much better helming something that was written by someone else. Something a bit more inventive and able to better blend familiar horror genre moments. 

4/10

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Don't Breathe 2 (2021)

Stephen Lang returns in the role of “The Blind Man” in what may be, despite strong competition, one of the most unnecessary and unpalatable sequels in recent years. Because the last time we saw The Blind Man, he had been up to all kinds of nastiness.

Lang’s character is now the guardian of a little girl, Phoenix (Madelyn Grace). He saved her from the burnt shell of a house some time ago, and has been raising her ever since. He has also been teaching her some survival skills. Those skills come in handy when Raylan (Brendan Sexton III) and his gang break in to kidnap Phoenix. Raylan claims to be her real father, and he is offering to correct the lies that she has been told by her blind parental figure. Does Raylan have his own agenda though?

Director Rodo Sayagues makes his debut here, moving up from his successful producer role, but keeping himself safely in the company of Fede Alvarez, who helmed/co-wrote the first film and helped co-write this one. Sayagues tries to keep things in line with the first film, but he cannot overcome the major hurdle that most people thought about when this was first announced. How do you get people rooting for such a bad guy? Okay, you make his potential enemies worse, but that’s not enough to erase the memory of just how depraved our new “anti-hero” is, or once was. 

Lang is as good as he usually is here, and his performance is on par with his performance in the first film, but he is fighting against weaker material here. Taking the character out of his own home, as it does just before the halfway point, makes it harder to just accept his apparent super-powers. The fact that it is Lang manages to just about keep it believable though, as I know he could still kick my ass without needing to have full use of his eyes. Grace is good as the plucky young girl in jeopardy, and Sexton III is a decent baddie, supported by Adam Young (in a role that may as well be named “main henchman”). There’s also a small role for Fiona O’Shaugnessy, who makes a strong impression with the limited screentime given to her sinister and cruel character.

There are a number of individual moments here that work well, most of them involving Lang delivering some serious pain to people who sorely underestimate him, but this never feels like it has enough going for it to work for an entire film. Even the visual style, although cool and fitting at times, becomes stale and repetitive before the end credits roll.

Some people still managed to enjoy this. Personally, I don’t see the appeal.

5/10

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Netflix And Chill: Session 9 (2001)

I'm not going to draw this out, Session 9 remains one of my favourite horror movies released in the past two decades, and one of my favourite horror movies of all time. Making the most of one main location, the Danvers State Mental Hospital, it is an impressive psychological horror that just keeps diving darker and darker, all the way to one of the most disturbing endings of all time.

Gordon Fleming (Peter Mullan) is the boss of a crew who have been hired to remove asbestos from an abandoned hospital. He needed the gig badly, and so made sure to match any other one while promising to get the job finished in a week. This puts extra pressure on him and his crew, but there's a massive bonus in it for them if all goes well. Phil (David Caruso) is his second-in-command, basically, there's Mike (Stephen Gevedon) and Hank (Josh Lucas), the latter individual now in a relationship with Phil's ex, and Jeff (Brendan Sexton III), Gordon's nephew. Tensions build as the work is carried out, and you get to hear spooky tapes being played by Mike, who spends some of his break times listening to the psychiatric sessions he discovered in one of the many abandoned rooms. Gordon also has domestic problems on his mind, but maybe all will be well if they can get the job done in one week.

The more I think about it, the less I can think to criticise about Session 9. Director Brad Anderson (and I'd argue that this film, despite not making a massive impact when first released, helped him step up a level, in terms of exposure, after it was embraced by genre fans) puts everything together with an expert touch, working from a great script co-written by himself and Gevedon. It may be making use of a location, but a) it doesn't feel like that is all it has going for it, and b) it's a damn fine location for a horror movie.

Mullan is as great as he always is in the lead role, and he can convey a real mix of emotions underlining all of the building horror as everything becomes clearer during the final moments. Caruso has rarely been better, doing a great job as a blue-collar worker trying to earn a good payday while helping a friend through a tough time. Lucas puts in another turn that allows him to be a bit of a douchebag, and Brendan Sexton III walks a fine line between annoying youngster and vulnerable kid, particularly as his severe nyctophobia plays into the plot. I'm not too familiar with Gevedon, but he does just fine, although his strength seems to lie in the writing side of things.

Despite the moments that feel like standard horror tropes (when people start to go missing, when everyone splits up to search for someone, etc), this is, like the central location itself, an atmospheric and dark building that creaks and groans while sitting on some very solid foundations. All of the exposition, and it is a film that threads a LOT of exposition throughout, feels natural as it is conveyed between different characters, the geography of the site is clear enough to follow everything, and the character development is never warped for the sake of the scares.

Do yourself a favour and watch this one ASAP. You won't regret it. If you do, well, I can't help it if you have bad taste.

10/10

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