Prime Time: Drop Dead Gorgeous (1999)

The argument has been made that 1999 was one of the greatest ever years for movies. I don't know if I buy into that, although it's hard to dismiss any one of the major titles that a movie fan could namecheck for you. It was an undeniably strong year though, and a number of movies created a butterfly effect still reverberating through the cinematic landscape to this day, and may keep affecting things far into the future. Drop Dead Gorgeous, on the other hand, is one 1999 movie that didn't necessarily have that kind of impact. I would argue that it's equally deserving of praise and celebration though.

The debut feature from director Michael Patrick Jann, working from a screenplay by Lona Williams (who also gave us the very enjoyable, and sadly forgotten, Sugar & Spice), Drop Dead Gorgeous is a mockumentary that I would actually rate higher than many of the films directed by Christopher "master of the mockumentary" Guest. It's all about a teen beauty pageant, and allows viewers to follow the determined Amber Atkins (Kirsten Dunst), the seemingly destined Becky Leeman (Denise Richards), the absolutely impartial, honest, pageant host, and mother to Becky, Gladys Leeman (Kirstie Alley), and a number of other wonderful and quirky characters.

As well as those already mentioned, the cast list here includes Ellen Barkin, Allison Janney, Brittany Murphy, Amy Adams, Mindy Sterling, Alexandra Holden, Matt Malloy, Michael McShane, and Will Sasso (if you don't recognise the names then, rest assured, you should recognise the faces). They're all doing great work, and everyone gets such an equal chance to shine that I would find it impossible to single anyone out ahead of anyone else. Dunst, Richards, and Alley feel like the three sides of an important trio though, and they should be happy to have this film on their respecting CVs. Between this and some of her other roles at the time, Richards shows such a knack for slyly comedic material that I am always sad we didn't get her in more features that could have made better use of her talent.

There are some moments of dubious taste, to put it mildly, and one or two words are thrown around casually that wouldn't be thrown around so much nowadays, but there's a consistent effort made to ensure that most of the jokes are targeting the concept of beauty pageants, whether it's mocking the importance bestowed upon them by people who may keep that as an all-time high point in their lives or showing the damage caused by the focus on looks, weight, and generally being viewed as an ornamental object capable of stating vapid platitudes instead of a fully-rounded human being. 

The real test of any mockumentary is just how convincing it is though, how easily can you forget that you're watching something scripted and acted. This is where Drop Dead Gorgeous manages to remain high in my own list of great 1999 movies. I struggle to think of any one moment that strikes a wrong note. Maybe a couple of the gags are just a bit too hilarious to ensure the purity of the format, but I'll happily put up with that if I can continue to cry tears of laughter as Denise Richards presents a very special interpretation of "Can't Take My Eyes Off You".

Every one of the main people involved with this, behind and in front of the camera, has delivered other work in the years since it was released. Some of that other work is great, particularly when you think of the powerhouse performances we've had from Dunst and Janney in the last quarter of a century, but I would still hold this as a very high benchmark for everybody named in the credits. It's still as beautiful as ever.

9/10

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Altitude (2018)

Here's the thing about my movie reviews. I often forget to mention the musical scores, I am woefully forgetful when it comes to namechecking people like cinematographers and designers (people that are vital to helping the director create their vision), and I don't always write essays based around the themes and subtext of the more meaningful cinematic classics I have watched over the years. Sometimes I try, don't get me wrong, but I'm often aiming to just relay a general feeling about the films I have watched. My reviews are often just about my reaction, as opposed to being a full dissection. Sometimes I manage to pack a bit more in there, and am always happy when the thoughts and words flow well for me, and sometimes I am happy that I am watching another film that doesn't really need such thoughtful criticism.

Altitude certainly falls into that latter camp.

Denise Richards plays Gretchen Blair, a female FBI agent who has boarded a flight after having a very bad time of things recently. She gets angry at an inconsiderate idiot who has ended up sitting in her seat and ends up being taken to first class. Result. Sitting alongside a man named Terry (Kirk Barker), her moment of happiness is short-lived. Some people want Terry, or at least what he has hidden away from them, and that means that they want to take control of the flight. Greer Grammer is the woman in charge of the criminal plan, and Dolph Lundgren is her right hand man (although she also has other muscle on hand, with the most recognisable being Chuck Liddell).

Altitude is preposterous. Of course it is. The characters are all ridiculous clichés, very few moments are plausible, and it's a film in which viewers have to accept Richards as the strong and smart goodie up against Lundgren.

Director Alex Merkin tries to keep everything moving along zippily enough, throwing occasional distractions in (like Jonathan Lipnicki as an over the top, dancing and singing, air steward) to break up the overly familiar plotting as we get the opening situation that puts our lead in need of a rest, an overview of the plane and the passengers, developing awareness of the dangerous plot, etc. The script, by Jesse Mittelstadt, also helps here, with the material sadly growing weaker when the actual action starts to take place. Neither Merkin nor Mittelstadt can do enough to get this anywhere close to any of the other, superior, plane-based action thrillers that we've already seen over the years. And some of the dialogue is either laughably cheesy or cringe-inducing, depending on your mindset.

Richards is okay in her role (although I did spend the majority of the movie squinting at the screen and asking myself "is that Denise Richards?"), and Barker is fine, if fairly bland. That leaves it to the villains to liven things up. They don't quite manage it, mainly due to the fact that Granmer plays her role in a way that makes you wish someone had been able to negotiate a fee for Krysten Ritter, and also the fact that Lundgren is sorely underused (he spends most of his screentime actually flying the plane). The least said about Liddell the better, but it's worth mentioning Jordi Vilasulo, who does a decent job as the air marshall who gets involved in the situation.

You could do a lot worse if you're after a mindless slice of action, which is all it is trying to provide. I'll watch anything Lundgren does, he improves pretty much any film that he stars in, and this may not be one of his better films, but it's still a fun one.

5/10

You can pick up the film, under the name "Hijacked", here.
Americans can get it here.

Wild Things (1998)

Wild Things is a twisty, stylish, sexy thriller that features a great cast all doing a great job. It's also quite trashy and stretches things further and further with each scene but I still love it (and, no, that's not just because of the scenes in which Denise Richards goes topless . . . . . . . . . . it's because of Theresa Russell too).

While aiming to keep things as spoiler-free as possible, I shall describe the plot thus: Matt Dillon plays Sam Lombardo, a popular and handsome guidance counselor who is accused of a heinous crime by Kelly Van Ryan (Denise Richards). It's simply untrue, according to Sam, but Kelly is the daughter of Sandra Van Ryan (Theresa Russell) and Sandra Van Ryan has the money and influence to make sure that Sam no longer has a place in his town. Kevin Bacon and Daphne Rubin-Vega are the two main cops on the case and Neve Campbell plays Suzie Toller, a girl who may end up playing an important part in the proceedings. Oh, and I'd better not forget to mention the great performance from Bill Murray as Ken Bowden, just about the only lawyer who will take a chance on defending Sam.

There's a clever, fun script by Stephen Peters and great direction from the talented John McNaughton (who provided audiences with the very different, and disturbing, Henry: Portrait Of A Serial Killer and also directed the enjoyable Mad Dog & Glory) that manages to create a darker and darker style while still maintaining the colour and heat of the Florida locations.

A decent score by George S. Clinton accompanies the action but the icing on the cake is the acting from everyone involved. Matt Dillon is always a great actor, as is Kevin Bacon, so you expect them to do good things. And they do. Neve Campbell is just fine and Denise Richards is fantastic (she's actually very good in the right roles, such as her part in Drop Dead Gorgeous, but that often seems to be ignored because of her physical attributes). Bill Murray is another actor I'd watch in just about anything and he's as wonderful as ever here. Daphne Rubin-Vega easily holds her own and does well to avoid her character being pushed into the background.

Trashy and sexy fun, this is the kind of movie you'll probably enjoy if you liked Cruel Intentions and the fantastic Body Heat. And make sure that you keep watching the credits at the end of the movie to see a number of crucial revelations.

8/10

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