Heaven Help Us AKA Catholic Boys (1985)

Set in a Catholic Boys' School in Brookly in the 1960s, Heaven Help Us takes the standard elements of any "coming of age" movie and bakes it in the greenhouse effect created by teenage rebellion coming up against overly strict monks. It benefits from a nice sense of time and place, an enjoyable soundtrack and a cast of '80s favourites.

Andrew McCarthy plays Michael Dunn, the new boy at the school who quickly has to learn how to fit in. He befriends Caesar (Malcolm Danare) and that seems to be his first mistake when he sees how Caesar is treated by the bullying Rooney (Kevin Dillon). Thankfully, the boys don't stay enemies for too long because they have a common foe in the shape of the monks running the school. Brother Thaddeus (Donald Sutherland) seems a bit strict when speaking to the boys, but isn't all that bad, and Brother Timothy (John Heard) is new to the school and pretty damn cool for a monk, but Brother Constance (Jay Patterson) is a real nasty piece of work, always ready to dish out punishments far outweighing any perceived crime. When out of school, the boys try to relax and enjoy time at a local hangout, where Michael meets Dani (Mary Stuart Masterson), but the hangout is not safe from the monks, who often raid the building as they attempt to catch wrongdoers.

Michael Dinner directs this charming slice of teenage turbulence, from a script by Charles Purpura, and he takes the standard storyline and mix of characters and elevates them with a superb cast. As well as those already mentioned there are roles for Shawn Wallace, Yeardley Smith, Patrick Dempsey and Stephen Geoffreys (stealing the show as a young man addicted to onanism).

Kevin Dillon may not be the best of the leading players, but his slightly weaker performance is compensated for by the work from everyone else involved. McCarthy is in great form here, especially during the powerful and pleasing final act, and Mary Stuart Masterson is wonderful, as usual (okay, I had a crush on her in the '80s, so sue me). Malcolm Danare is fine in his role while John Heard does such good work that it's a shame he didn't get more screen-time. Indeed, it's a shame that he didn't get many more roles like this one to remind people of how good he could be.

It's a tricky film to track down on this side of the pond (but it's also on YouTube in sections for those who cannot afford, or are unable, to get the DVD) but it's one worth trying to get hold of, even for just the one viewing to see if you agree or disagree with those who really like it.

8/10

http://www.amazon.com/Heaven-Help-Us-Patrick-Dempsey/dp/B0007TKNEC/ref=sr_1_1?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1357052451&sr=1-1&keywords=heaven+help+us

976-Evil (1988)

Written by Brian Helgeland and Rhet Topham, 976-Evil is of interest to horror fans because it's the directorial debut of one Mr. Robert Englund. Yes, the one and only Freddy Krueger tries his razor-fingered hand at the horror movie game and shows that he's been learning more than just how to wisecrack and slash teens while hanging around on the set of numerous horror movies.

About 10 years ago I knew a woman who went through some personal upheaval and was distraught after her partner walked out on her. I used to visit and try to provide comforting words, all the while knowing how hollow and worthless they seemed. And the worst thing was that this poor woman wasted a LOT of money ringing up a certain "psychic hotline". I've never had much time for anyone who claims to have such powers in a way that can make them money, I think these people are manipulative opportunists (as opposed to anyone who believes that they have a certain gift and remains content to simply help others on occasion). So it was hard for me to sit there and listen to the nonsense that I was being told was "spookily accurate" when I could tell, from my unattached and unemotional viewpoint, that it was all bullshit. I could see just how much was wrong, how much was being interpreted by a desperate woman who wanted some answers to something she couldn't understand and how much was something anyone could say in a general statement to almost anyone on the end of a phone. Why tell you all of this? It's not a nice memory and there may be others reading this who have gone through the same thing. I don't mean to offend. I offer this up now because as well as being a standard horror movie, 976-Evil deliberately uses the murky, money-grabbing world of premium phone lines as a major stepping stone en route to a personal hell.

Young Hoax (Stephen Geoffreys) is a weak, bullied boy. He looks up to his cousin, Spike (Patrick O'Bryan), but also resents the fact that he seems to be the constant victim. Whether he's being given a kindly brush-off by Spike or having his head dunked in the toilet bowl, schooldays aren't exactly overflowing with happy memories for Hoax. So when he finds a card encouraging him to dial 976-Evil and find out his particular horror-scope he makes the call and follows the advice given to him. This advice works out well so he keeps using the service, eventually becoming consumed with a greed for the potential power to lash out and everyone who ever made his life miserable.

Starting off a bit unsure of itself, 976-Evil eventually builds into a pretty enjoyable horror film that rises above the small budget and has a bit of fun with the central concept. There aren't any huge set-pieces that will linger in the memory but there is a nice growing atmosphere of unease and danger as Hoax becomes more enamoured of the telephone service (think of young Arnie in Christine and you get the idea).

The cast are a mixed bag but Stephen Geoffreys is very good as Hoax, Sandy Dennis is entertainingly overbearing as Aunt Lucy and Patrick O'Bryan is acceptable enough. Lezlie Deane (who would go on to appear in an episode of Freddy's Nightmares and also the incorrectly-titled Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare) certainly has some screen presence and there's a small role for the superb Robert Picardo.  Jim Metzler and Maria Rubell may be rather bland but their characters help to dig up information around the sidelines just fine.

It's certainly not up there with the best low-budget, independent horrors but it's an enjoyable enough way to pass the time and shows that Robert Englund can do almost as well behind the camera as he does in front of it.

7/10.

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