Cheaper By The Dozen 2 (2005)

Steve Martin and Bonnie Hunt return as Tom and Kate Baker, parents of twelve children (hence the title), in this sequel to the bland and harmless Cheaper By The Dozen. While the first movie was about the parents trying to fit in a career before realising that perhaps their children still needed them available at home for a few years yet, this sequel shows an attempt to keep the family together and enthusiastic for a holiday that might be their last one together. The older kids are about to set off further afield while the younger kids aren't going to want to join in with the family activites forever. However, when the Bakers get to their vacation spot, Tom finds that Jimmy Murtaugh (Eugene Levy) has bought most of the area and is living nearby. Jimmy is very competitive, and that brings out the worst in Tom.

Adam Shankman takes over from Shawn Levy for this lacklustre affair, reteaming with both Martin and Levy after having worked with them on Bringing Down The House (2003). If you have to choose between this movie and that movie, go with that movie. If you're forced to watch this movie then you won't suffer through anything truly terrible, but there are so many better ways to spend your time.

The script by Sam Harper is pretty horrible. There are one or two okay scenes, but I can't think of any individual lines of dialogue that made me so much as smirk. Think of the lessons that were learned in the first movie and the way in which the family was shown to be imperfect, but able to stick together when things got tough, and then rehash those ideas in an even less amusing way and you have Harper's script.

Martin and Hunt are both just fine as the parents, while Piper Perabo, Tom Welling and Hilary Duff are still bearable as the older members of the Baker brood. Jonathan Bennett is enjoyable enough as Perabo's partner, and Alyson Stoner gets the best moments as Sarah, the young mischief-maker who finally takes notice of a boy and starts to think about using makeup. As for the other main featured family, Eugene Levy is okay in his unsympathetic role, Carmen Electra is always a welcome addition to any movie I watch (hey, if I have to sit through films like this then allow me to enjoy any silver lining I can), Jaime King is  and a very young Taylor Lautner goes about being a very young Taylor Lautner.

If you enjoyed Cheaper By The Dozen then this is just about watchable. It's not good, but I've seen much worse. No, I don't know why they didn't call me for that poster quote either: "Not good, but I've seen much worse - Kevin Matthews"

4/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Cheaper-By-The-Dozen-DVD/dp/B000E6UMEY/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1379438832&sr=8-2&keywords=cheaper+by+the+dozen+2

Silent Night (2012)

This is how you do a remake and this is how you do a Christmas slasher movie, oh yes. Silent Night is a remake of Silent Night, Deadly Night but, to be honest, it only takes loose inspiration from that movie. Both films are about killer Santas but there are some big differences. Fans, however, will be delighted to see a number of nods to the original film.

It's Christmas Eve and Officer Aubrey Bradimore (Jaime King) is called in to help out while everyone prepares for the big day. The streets are full of men dressed as Santa, all getting ready for the annual Christmas parade. That makes things awfully difficult when the police find out that they have a killer on their hands, a killer meting out justice while dressed as Santa Claus.

A lot of people will find so many elements of Silent Night just wrong, wrong, wrong. Personally, I think that screenwriter Jayson Rothwell and director Steven C. Miller get everything just right. The film doesn't waste any time in setting up the nasty premise and then barely lets up until the end credits roll (approximately 94 minutes later).

The death scenes play a big part in the entertainment factor, of course, with a variety of methods used to get rid of various folk on the naughty list. Electrocution by a set-up that involves a lot of Christmas lights, some fun with a woodchipper and an absolutely classic case of axe head meeting human head, those are just a few of the many great kills in the movie.

However, as much as a few horror fans may debate the issue, great kills alone don't make for a great movie. Thankfully, Silent Night also has a great cast to add to the entertainment value. Jaime King is a lead you can really root for so there are no problems there but the supporting cast are where things really start to shine. Malcolm McDowell clearly has a blast as the Sheriff who keeps coming up with absurd sayings to apply to every situation and Donal Logue is great fun as a cynical Santa who falls under suspicion. Ellen Wong, Brendan Fehr, Lisa Marie, Courtney-Jane White, Ali Tataryn, Curtis Moore and Tom Anniko all do well in a variety of supporting roles, some more memorable than others for reasons that will become obvious once you watch the thing.

That's the main point I want to reiterate at the end of this review, DO watch the movie. If you're a horror fan then this is a fantastic, beautifully simple, bodycount slasher movie just like they used to make. If you're a comedy fan then you might just find yourself laughing at the sheer gusto of the whole thing. If you're a fan of all things nice and sweet then you . . . . . . . . well, you may just want to ignore this entire review and rewatch A Christmas Story instead.

9/10

http://www.amazon.com/Silent-Night-Blu-ray-Malcolm-McDowell/dp/B009IV2ZCI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1354577220&sr=8-1&keywords=silent+night