Prime Time: Assimilate (2019)

Zach Henderson and Randy Foster are two young men who decide to film life in and around their small town, trying to get a piece of that YouTube fame (or whatever generic video uploading site is standing in for it). Nothing happens in their town, or so they think. Some new bugs have arrived, bugs that bite people. And once someone is bitten, it’s only a matter of time until they change. With everyone radically changing around them, Zach and Randy end up teaming up with Kayla, desperately trying to avoid assimilation while they figure out the best way to fight back against what looks very much like an invasion of creatures that snatch/swap bodies. Because, yes, this is a teen-friendly reworking of Invasion Of The Bodysnatchers.

Director John Murlowski is an odd figure. His filmography covers a wide range of movies, from one of the many Amityville series entries to the infamous Santa With Muscles, and he has helmed a couple of movies that have pleasantly surprised me (including that Amityville movie). This premise seems like an easy one to get right, and Murlowski does a good job with the material, working from a script that he co-wrote with Steven Palmer Peterson. It’s far from perfect, and may be the least of the films based on this material, but it’s tense and entertaining throughout.

The life cycle of the invader is pieced together well, with characters figuring things out as they face increasingly immediate threats, and the way the town is overtaken is impressively quick and plausible. People are changed, that’s obvious, but the aim is to get the new creations outnumbering the original humans as quickly as possible, and a lot of the changes happening so brazenly make things seem more ridiculous when our leads try to convince others of odd happenings.

Joel Courtney and Calum Worth do well in their roles, playing Zach and Randy, and they come across as likeable enough throughout, even when doing the whole “let’s film everything around us and comment on it” spiel that could have easily been built up to turn this into a painful found footage take on the material, and I am very glad that route wasn’t taken. Andi Matichak is equally good in the role of Kayla, a character also given a little brother to try and protect, just to up the stakes, and all three leads are served well by the script. Some of the supporting players have to overdo the change from normal to blank slate, but Cam Gigandet stands out as a local Sheriff who may or may not end up being a dangerous enemy.

Although I didn’t love this, I liked it well enough. And I like it more when I think of the choices made for what NOT to do. No doing the whole found footage thing is a big plus. Not cramming the film with songs to help sell any accompanying soundtrack album. Having the special effects used pretty sparingly, and therefore making them more effective. There are other films in which these things - format, FX work, banging tunes - can, and have, been used to great effect, but this feels like everything was done to make the film teen-friendly without moving too far away from the simplistic brilliance of the central concept. It features youths at the heart of it all, but never dumbs things down or tries to be “too cool for school”. And the third act adds one or two pleasant surprises.

6/10

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Christmas Mail (2010)

Ashley Scott plays Kristi North, a young woman who has the job of replying to children who have written a letter to Santa. Kristi takes her job very seriously. So seriously, in fact, that she could end up causing a potential backlog at the mail office, something that the manager (Lochlyn Munro) doesn't want to happen. So he asks Matt (A. J. Buckley) to find out a bit more about her, and just what exactly she might be up to. It turns out that she just genuinely loves Christmas, and wants to make as many children happy as possible. But does that include Emily (Piper Mackenzie Harris), the young niece who has been staying with her Uncle Matt ever since her parents died? All she wants is for her uncle to meet someone special.

As ridiculous as it is predictable, Christmas Mail manages to be a fairly painless experience thanks to the main cast members. Buckley is easy to believe as a sweet and earnest guy, North is as cheery and cocoa-obsessed as required, and even Harris isn't too annoying as the girl trying to plan some way for her uncle to meet a good woman. Munro is pretty funny, playing the nominal villain of the piece, and Rolonda Watts is another bit of good cheer. Vanessa Evigan also gets some screentime, for no other discernible reasons than to provide the standard confusion/complication required in this sort of fare, but she's given very little to do.

The script, by Lorene Lacey and Steven Palmer Peterson, feels quite slapdash. It's almost as if they had the germ of an idea and then decided to flesh it out with minor touches they'd seen in other Christmas movies. Someone taking a great interest in the letters to Santa isn't a new idea, of course, but that doesn't mean that it has to be executed as lackadaisically as it is here. I mean . . . . . . it's SO lackadaisical that I had to check the spelling of the word "lackadaisical" to put here, as it was the most appropriate choice.

Director John Murlowski does nothing to pep things up. The only other plus point, aside from the cast, is the fact that is somehow still moves along nicely enough. Okay, there are one or two mildly amusing moments too (mainly involving Munro and/or Watts, but a dinner arranged for Matt and an elderly neighbour also made me smile), but not enough to make this one of the better choices you could make while organising a potentially crammed viewing schedule. Yet, like so many other films just like this one, it would probably work as background noise while you're battling with wrapping paper and sticky tape. Is that the real reason behind so many of these filmic baubles being made? Or do I just keep reverting back to the same scenario because I'm a poor writer with little imagination? Maybe both. Either way, you've been suitably advised about this one.

4/10

http://www.amazon.com/Christmas-Mail-Ashley-Scott/dp/B005GUVGKM/ref=sr_1_1?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1417608746&sr=1-1&keywords=christmas+mail+dvd

Amityville: A New Generation (1993)

I don't know if I am just getting easier to please after enduring the awful fourth and fifth movies in this franchise or whether things genuinely picked up slightly in the early 90s but this is another Amityville movie that I actually quite enjoyed. In fact, it was pretty good and I'd even consider rewatching it.

Directed by John Murlowski, and written by Christopher DeFaria and Antonio Toro (who also wrote the instalment before this one), Amityville: A New Generation once again uses the plot device of an object from the old house ending up elsewhere and causing a lot of trouble. This time it's a mirror.

Ross Partridge plays Keyes, a young photographer who ends up being given the evil mirror by a homeless man that he photographs. Of course, he doesn't know that it's an evil mirror. It's just a mirror with a strange, ornate frame. Perhaps a number of bizarre deaths that occur to those in contact should raise suspicions but, of course, it still takes a while for Keyes to realise the truth, a truth that reveals how Keyes coming to own the mirror was more than just random chance.

It's standard nonsense, really, but it benefits from some good pacing between each of the set-pieces, a finale that is as loony as it is surprisingly interesting and a cast full of genre movie favourites - David Naughton has a decent role, Robert Rusler plays an asshole, Richard Roundtree is good to see but doesn't get much screentime, Terry O'Quinn is the man investigating the strange circumstances and Lin Shaye puts in another of her small but memorable roles in this kind of fare.

The death scenes are decent and the ridiculous plot developments are teased out in a way that makes them a bit easier to swallow. Take a moment to think about it all, however, and it quickly becomes apparent just how silly it all is. Thankfully, that doesn't need to happen until the end credits roll because Murlowski keeps things moving along nicely from start to finish. There's some fleeting nudity, decent effects, a flashback or two and a recurring surreal nightmare for the main character. Which makes it hard to hate.

6/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Amityville--New-Generation-Ross-Partridge/dp/B00006IXBM/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1348043184&sr=8-1