The Art Of The Steal (2013)

The Art Of The Steal is a con/heist movie like a hundred others I could name. It's nowhere near the best of the bunch, but it passes the time pleasantly enough, thanks mainly to a great cast all having a lot of fun onscreen.

Kurt Russell is Crunch Calhoun, a thief/getaway driver who ends up doing a stint in a Polish prison thanks to a deal made by his brother, Nicky (Matt Dillon). Years later, Crunch is a stunt motorbike rider who provides some extra spectacle, in the form of some painful crash landings, for some extra cash. He has a young friend (Francie, played by Jay Baruchel) who hates watching it happen, but can't do anything to stop it, and a girlfriend (Lola, played by Katheryn Winnick) who keeps motivating him to do whatever it takes to make them some money. When a golden opportunity to pull off a major job comes along, Crunch ends up working with Nicky once again, as well as some other familiar faces from his past. He doesn't trust his brother, yet he needs him to make the whole plan work.

Written and directed by Jonathan Sobol, this is a movie that does just enough to coast by. It's clever, yet not too clever. It's derivative, yet not in a way that makes it feel as if it's directly lifting from any superior movie from this subgenre. And it is, despite its flaws, fun. The script does what it needs to do, in terms of the plot developments and twists, but it also throws in a handful of unnecessary moments that end up proving to be highly amusing. Just watch Jay Baruchel trying to bumble his way past a border guard and try not to laugh.

However, even with the decent script and direction, this would be an inferior film if it didn't have such a great ensemble cast involved. Russell is always a pleasure to watch onscreen. Always, and this performance is no different. Dillon is another performer I like seeing in movies, and I've been a big fan of Baruchel for years, so to see him alongside these actors was a real treat. Winnick isn't given much to do, but she does it well. Kenneth Welsh and Chris Diamantopoulos make up the rest of the main crew. Both are good fun, although the former has more great lines. And it's also worth mentioning Jason Jones and Terence Stamp, playing the two men who are trying to catch Calhoun and co. Jones is very amusing, as an agent who doesn't really have the experience to make people take him seriously, while Stamp is the exasperated old hand who also happens to genuinely love art.

If you're in two minds about whether or not to watch The Art Of The Steal then just flip a coin to decide. If, however, you like the main cast members as much as I do then you should have a good time. So flip the coin and then make the call when you can see how it has landed. Consider it a small moment of conning yourself in preparation for the film.

6/10

http://www.amazon.com/The-Steal-Blu-ray-Kurt-Russell/dp/B00IARA89S/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1404610534&sr=8-1&keywords=the+art+of+the+steal+bluray

You know what else is a steal? My e-book of movie reviews, collated and put together in one massive package. Every copy sold helps me justify my obsessive viewing and review-writing to my understanding, but exasperated, wife.

The UK version can be bought here - http://www.amazon.co.uk/TJs-Ramshackle-Movie-Guide-Reviews-ebook/dp/B00J9PLT6Q/ref=sr_1_3?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1395945647&sr=1-3&keywords=movie+guide

And American folks can buy it here - http://www.amazon.com/TJs-Ramshackle-Movie-Guide-Reviews-ebook/dp/B00J9PLT6Q/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1395945752&sr=8-1-fkmr0&keywords=TJs+ramshackle+mov

As much as I love the rest of the world, I can't keep up with all of the different links in different territories, but trust me when I say that it should be there on your local Amazon.

April Fools: Cottage Country (2013)

Tyler Labine spends some time in a cottage in the middle of some woods, and death starts to have a field day. Yes, it should be clear to anyone who has seen the cover art for this movie that one or two people wanted to profit from the goodwill heaped upon the excellent Tucker & Dale Vs. Evil.

Labine stars as Todd, a young man who is planning to propose to his loved one (Cammie, played by Malin Akerman) during a romantic weekend at his family's cottage. Unfortunately, his brother (Dan Petronijevic) turns up, accompanied by his crazy girlfriend (Lucy Punch). Tensions quickly rise, leading to bloodshed and a situation that quickly spirals from bad to worse.

Although there's a fun cast here, all trying their hardest, there's just something about Cottage Country that stops it from every becoming a good film. Perhaps it's because we've all seen this kind of material done a number of times before, and done better. Perhaps it's because of that horrible feeling that people are just trying to wring more money from fans of Tucker & Dale Vs. Evil. Or . . . . . . perhaps it's just not good enough, with the tension never really feeling that tense and the comedy never being that funny.

Labine is as likable as ever, and Akerman is someone I tend to enjoy onscreen (she's gorgeous, and game for a laugh), but nobody else really makes a great impression. Petronijevic and Punch are saddled with portraying two extremely annoying characters, which makes their scenes hard to enjoy, and Benjamin Ayres, Kenneth Welsh, Nancy Beatty and Sabrina Grdevich just don't get enough to do.

Writer Jeremy Boxen fails to mix in any surprises, or good enough jokes, while director Peter Wellington does nothing to help strengthen the desperately-in-need-of-strengthening material. Everything is put together competently enough, but the film just never takes off.

If you like the leads, as I do, then you'll be able to get some amusement from this, but it's a below average effort that I can't imagine anyone listing as a favourite.

4/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Cottage-Country-Blu-Ray-Kenneth-Welsh/dp/B00EYVFHY0/ref=sr_1_1?s=dvd&ie=UTF8&qid=1396988320&sr=1-1&keywords=cottage+country

The Fog (2005)

A remake that nobody really wanted turns out to be a film that few people will love. The Fog has one purpose in life, and that's to make horror fans, like myself, roll our eyes when we talk about the 1980 version of The Fog and have to add "the John Carpenter one". Of course, the same could be said about The Thing and Halloween, but it's this one that rankles the most, perhaps due to the way that an atmospheric, campfire tale of a movie is turned into a horrible, clumsy, teen horror.

Tom Welling stars as Nick Castle (that reference/in-joke is about as good as it gets, folks). Nick is making a living in the small community of Antonio Island. The community is about to unveil a statue honouring its founding fathers, but it seems that they may not have been too honourable in the dealings that led to a major boost in local fortunes. As people gather to celebrate, a fog starts to roll in, and that fog seems to contain some spirits who want revenge for wrongs exacted upon them.

Cooper Layne may not have written the best script here (adapting ideas from the original material by John Carpenter and Debra Hill), but director Rupert Wainwright certainly doesn't help with any of the choices that he makes. None of the horrible CGI or jump scares are a patch on anything from the original movie. It may be unfair to compare the two, but when so many similiar elements are onscreen, and the recent version is overshadowed by a film that was made twenty five years previously, I think there's good reason to comment.

Welling tries, but he's no leading man. Maggie Grace is just . . . . . there as Elizabeth, the sorta girlfriend of Welling's character, and it's only Selma Blair who really makes this worth a watch. Taking on a role so memorably played by the gorgeous Adrienne Barbeau is no mean feat, but Blair doesn't do too badly at all, despite the script leaving her hanging out to dry in the third act. DeRay Davis, Kenneth Welsh, Adrian Hough and some other folk all play second fiddle to the the not-so-special effects.

Taking a movie and remaking it badly isn't really a major sin, despite what we fans will sometimes say. Taking a film that really crafted a perfect campfire tale, however, and then pissing on that fire and trying to serve up the wet ashes to people? Well, that's not really a major sin either, but it should be. Oh yes, it should.

3/10

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Miracle (2004)

Unbeknownst to me, the world of international ice hockey was dominated throughout the 1970s by the Russians. In fact, by the time the 1980 Winter Olympics was looming, they looked unbeatable. That was the scenario facing head coach Herb Brooks (played by Kurt Russell), and it was a scenario that led to some major changes in the way that the team was picked and trained.

Based on a true story, this is typical live-action Disney fare. It starts off with Herb applying for, and getting, the head coach position before then showing him selecting his team of young players, working them harder than they've ever been worked before, trying out some unusual tactics and then seeing how things pan out as they play on the national stage.

Director Gavin O'Connor, working from the script by Eric Guggenheim, hits all of the right notes at all of the right moments (just as he would a few years later with Warrior). This is a tale of self-belief, of courage, of sportsmanship and of, well, ice hockey.

Russell is great in the lead role and he gets to work alongside some wonderful talent. Patricia Clarkson plays his supportive wife, Noah Emmerich is an assistant coach who initially doubts his methods and Kenneth Welsh is the team doctor. The young hockey players consist of men picked predominantly for their hockey skills - Eddie Cahill, Patrick O'Brien Demsey and Michael Mantenuto being the three team players who get the most screentime. Thankfully, you wouldn't know that because they do a fine job, although perhaps that IS because they spend a lot of time ice-skating.

This isn't a film for cynics, few Disney films are. There are no surprises here, what with it being based on a true story, but even if you're unfamiliar with what really happened, as I was, then . . . . . . there are no surprises here. It also lacks much humour. This isn't The Mighty Ducks and it seems as if O'Connor wanted to make sure that nobody watching the film would ever forget that. He succeeded. Whereas The Mighty Ducks was a family movie full of great characters and fun moments, this is an uplifting true story, full of good acting, suitable musical accompaniment and a big dollop of good ol' hey hey USA. I prefer the former type of movie myself, but this one is also a good watch.

7/10

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Death Wish V: The Face Of Death (1994)

The last film in the original franchise, it's a shame that Death Wish 5 is such a damp squib ending the series.

Written and directed by Allan A. Goldstein, this sequel sees Paul Kersey (Charles Bronson in his final film role) returning and getting close to some people who you just assume are going to be hurt in some way. Right enough, the inevitable happens and Kersey goes into full-on gunhappy mode.

With a cast that includes Lesley-Anne Down, Michael Parks, Saul Rubinek and Robert Joy, this movie may have a familiarity factor that the others slightly lacked but it's offset by the fact that it's slightly below average from start to finish. The film even loses the vibe of borderline exploitation nastiness that the preceding four movies had, making it nothing more than a standard revenge action movie that fails to stand up alongside many better films from the the time (ruled, essentially, by the likes of Stallone, Willis and Schwarzenegger defining modern machismo).

Charles Bronson is still highly watchable, and Michael Parks makes for a decent villain, but there's so little effort put in to the other aspects of the movie that it just feels lazy, tiresome and tired out. The violence isn't shocking enough compared to the previous films and the premise starts to become a bit of a joke, in many ways. Viewers most certainly considered the awful truth by the second or third movie in the series - being close to Paul Kersey is a very dangerous place to be - but it was often hidden behind the escalating violence and the quest for revenge that the central character would embark on. Sadly, there's just not enough going on this time around to detract you from thinking "actually, maybe Paul Kersey just shouldn't get into relationships".

The end of an era in many ways, and the last film role for Bronson, Death Wish 5 is just one disappointment after another. But it's not unwatchable and it doesn't take anything away from the many other great movies that gave us Bronson at his bad-ass best.

4/10.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Death-Wish-DVD-2012-Release/dp/B0073DOJWM/ref=sr_1_4?s=dvd&ie=UTF8&qid=1329081969&sr=1-4