Netflix And Chill: BlackBerry (2023)

Some technology stays with us for what seems like forever. Some of it comes and goes, having a shining moment before becoming an obscure novelty, and becoming the modern version of a tech antique within just a few years. Show someone a portable CD player nowadays and explain it to them. In fact, show someone the Sega Mega-CD. Remember that? My old flatmate had one. I'm not sure anyone else did. The world of the mobile phone is littered with other prime examples. Models that were once so ubiquitous, but are no longer around (unless re-released to appeal to nostalgia). The sturdy Nokia 3310 is one example. The Motorola Razr V3i is another. And there's the BlackBerry, the first device that I saw sold as letting you have the power of a computer in your pocket. I never had one, but I used to view all mobile communication devices as nothing more than accessories for yuppies and/or wankers.

Speaking of those kinds of people, here we are with a movie that tells us about the incredible rise, and just as incredible fall, of the device. Directed by, co-written by, and starring Matt Johnson, it shows how a couple of men (Mike, played by Jay Baruchel, and Doug, played by Johnson) were able to make their mark on the world once they allowed a wolf (Jim, played by Glenn Howerton) into their metaphorical hen-house.  

Based on a book, "Losing The Signal", written by Jacquie McNish and Sean Silcoff, BlackBerry benefits from a great script co-written by Johnson and Matthew Miller, and a trio of fantastic lead performances from Baruchel, Johnson, and Howerton, the latter an absolute bulldog in human form. There's also the inherent nostalgia factor, of course, and it helps that the true story has enough fascinating twists and turns to build a movie around.

Howerton is the individual overshadowing all others here, and his constant aggression is very entertaining, mainly because of how others struggle to deal with him. While there are elements of the character that you know would appeal to Howerton, it also forces him to leave any comedic instincts at the door as he depicts someone so strong-willed and single-minded that he becomes quite monstrous. Baruchel does his usual slightly awkward schtick, but also convinces as his character ages up and loses most of his innocence and naivete. Johnson might give himself the role of the most sensible one of the three, but that also allows him to stay present throughout most of the runtime without usually being the focus of any one scene, which may have helped him to focus on his role behind the camera. Martin Donovan turns up for a scene or two, as do Saul Rubinek, Cary Elwes, Michael Ironside, and Rich Sommer, and everyone else does what is necessary to make the environment onscreen feel as busy as it needs to be.

I didn't think I would enjoy this, despite hearing some good word about it when it was released a couple of years ago. Considering my own views of the BlackBerry device, I wasn't sure what the film would offer me. It turns out that it's a bittersweet look at people trying to maintain some integrity and optimism in a world that only holds those values for as long as the profit margins remain high enough. BlackBerry celebrates innovation and the blood, sweat, and tears that workers put into a product they had faith in, but it also makes clear from the earliest scenes that innovators and hard workers need someone to get out there and negotiate with businesses, and sell the product, to make it a real success. It's a great shame that everyone can't share the same principles, but maybe that's why certain products crash down so low after such unexpeted highs.

Anyway, I'm off to use an online game emulator to play Snake. Because some days I am reminded of how much I used to enjoy playing Snake on my Nokia 3310. 

8/10

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Lake Placid 3 (2010)

The third film in the series that seemed planned to squander all of the goodwill gained from the first film, Lake Placid 3 isn't terrible, but it's still a very far step down from that first film.

Colin Ferguson and Kirsty Mitchell play Nathan and Susan, a couple who end up taking over the lakeside property left by Sadie Bickerman (there's no substitute this time around, no Betty White or Cloris Leachman amusing viewers as a profane elder). Unbeknownst to Nathan and Susan, their son, Connor (Jordan Grehs) soon starts to amuse himself by feeding baby crocodiles. But baby crocodiles soon grow into big crocodiles. Nathan soon has his hands full, much to his disbelief, helped by Sheriff Tony Willinger (Michael Ironside) and a local hunter named Reba (Yancy Butler). There's also a selection of teens spending time at the lake, bumping up the potential bodycount.

Writer David Reed, who also delivered the next movie in this series, at least does a better job than his immediate predecessors with mixing the humour and the thrills, and director Griff Furst is used to the format for this kind of thing (just browse his filmography to see a variety of great titles that tell you exactly what you can expect from him, including the likes of Arachnoquake and Ghost Shark). He's hampered by the low standard in special effects that most SyFy Channel seem to have, but that doesn't stop him from working well with a script that aims for fun over any attempts at plausibility. 

Ferguson and Mitchell are about as bland as you can get, but that's all well and good when you have Ironside being very likeable in his supporting role, as well as Butler being amusingly over the top as someone who enjoys hunting any kind of prey, from the local wildlife to local young men. Grehs just has to be a kid with a secret habit of feeding crocs, which he does well enough, and Kacey Clarke, Mark Evans, Nils Hognestad, Brian Landon, and Angelica Penn play the main teens/appetisers.

Slight spoiler warning here, I guess . . . for anyone who enjoys the turn from Butler in this movie, you may be pleased to see that she is able to return for the next two films in the series, both of which also feature Robert Englund, despite her last scene in this film seeming to have quite an unambiguous fate. Mind you, expecting rigid continuity in a movie series about large killer crocs is probably like expecting to find a side of chips available for a quid in a Michelin-starred restaurant.

If you endured Lake Placid 2 then you might want to at least check this out. It's not one I would recommend to anyone else though. Only the hardiest of creature feature viewers need bother with it (and, indeed, with any other sequel entry in this snap-happy series), and anyone who wants to enjoy an all-too-brief sequence that features crocodiles on the hunt in a grocery store.

4/10

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Nobody (2021)

When a family are terrified by a home invasion one night, and the youngest member of the family loses her favourite kitty bracelet, the man of the house, Hutch Mansell (Bob Odenkirk) decides to head out and get some revenge. This leads to him being on a bus at the same time as a group of assholes who are harassing a woman, and Mansell decides that he can take out his rage on this group. This gets him noticed by the wrong people, mainly the very powerful Yulian Kuznetsov (Aleksey Serebryakov), and that means that people start to realise his past life was spent being the last person that many people ever saw.

Pretty much sold to people as another John Wick kind of movie, but with "Saul Goodman" in the lead, Nobody will definitely please fans of that series. The fun comes from the fact that Wick reluctantly returned to his killing ways while Mansell is actually keen to let out some rage that has been kept locked away during years of a steady 9-5 grind (a dreary life of routine shown in a montage at the start of the film). The only reason he doesn't want to start back down that path is because he knows how much he's going to enjoy the journey, and he knows how good he is at killing people.

Written by Derek Kolstad, who wrote the first John Wick movie, this is a smart and funny action flick with some impressive violence in the fight scenes. It's hard not to feel a sense of glee as Mansell slides comfortably back into his former habits, and he makes great use of every environment around him to remove the advantage that his opponents usually think they have.

Director Ilya Naishuller is no stranger to this kind of thing, having started his directorial career with an impressive POV short  ("Bad Motherfucker" for Biting Elbows) that would lead to him helming Hardcore Henry. Although I couldn't get on board with that POV gimmick for a whole feature, Naishuller certainly showed that he was happy to revel in gunshots, bone-breaking melee fights, and the kind of forward momentum that should keep most action movie fans pleased.

Odenkirk is superb in the lead role here, believably strong without having bulked up to seem huge. A great actor in pretty much everything I've ever seen him in, it's great to see him have fun in a role that seems so far out of his wheelhouse. I really hope more people see this and become Odenkirk fans. Serebryakov is the standard big baddie, and is just fine in his role, overseeing an army of henchmen who will all likely fail in their attempts to kill Odenkirk's character. RZA has a small role, which he does just fine with, and Christopher Lloyd is a real treat, playing David Mansell (father of Hutch), someone with a similar past. Connie Nielsen is a very understanding wife, Michael Ironside has a small role as a boss/father-in-law, and Colin Salmon has a nice little moment as "The Barber".

All in all, this is everything you could want it to be. The action satisfies, the plotting is good enough to make it all seem plausible (within the movie world), and the sense of humour throughout makes it feel even more suited to Odenkirk having the lead role. Everybody should see Nobody.

9/10

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Shudder Saturday: Still/Born (2017)

Movies are like jokes, in my opinion. They can be made about absolutely anything. what matters is the context and the motivation. But it's fair to say that some people may not be able to watch Still/Born, with the horror being derived from the aftermath of something that is a hugely traumatic experience for any mother to go through.

Christie Burke plays Mary, a young mother who now has a son named Adam. That's all well and good, but Adam was born with a twin brother named Jonathan, who was stillborn. Mary is obviously seriously affected by this, to the point where she starts thinking that a demonic entity is after her son. Unfortunately, everyone else simply sees Mary in a state of deteriorating mental health, and the only one who could cause harm to her son, as far as they are concerned, is Mary herself. Her husband (Jesse Moss) is sympathetic, to a point, and she also has some support from a good neighbour (Rebecca Olson) and her own mother (Sheila McCarthy). She's also seeing a doctor (Michael Ironside), but her refusal to be completely honest with him doesn't help. As things start to escalate, Mary becomes convinced that the only way to save her son is to make a sacrifice.

It's hard to be overly critical of director Brandon Christensen, who also co-wrote the script with Colin Minihan (still probably best known to genre fans just now as one half of The Vicious Brothers). Making his feature debut, Christensen has certainly picked a subject that contains layered levels of horror. It's something that needs to be handled just right, and both the script and direction allow time for a dark fog of sadness to permeate scenes in between the standard scares. Unfortunately, those standard scares are real mixed bag. The first hour is a slog, with a number of lazy, but admittedly effective, jump scares and some fleeting glimpses of graphic nastiness that some viewers definitely won't appreciate. It also makes for a tough viewing as you wonder whether this is a standard horror movie or a look at the world through the eyes of someone in a state of painful suffering after experiencing the worst loss of their life. That uneasy blend lasts right up until the final scenes, with a coda that feels equally dispiriting because of what it reveals to another main character. Some may argue that a scene between Mary and a mother who previously seemed to share her experience (played by Jenn Griffin) keeps the film rooted in more standard scares. I would have to disagree. It feels like a shared hallucination, mainly because of the way in which nobody else is ever brought in to the proceedings at the right time to offer help.

This is a film that floods the screen with a sense of helplessness, almost as if it dresses up the main character in heavy clothing and forces her to wade into deeper and deeper water. That's a hard thing to watch, at times, but would fit more in a film that wasn't also trying to deliver the required genre goods.

Burke is good in the lead role, managing to show her terror and paranoia without her performance devolving into a mass of wide-eyed hair-pulling and shrieking (as can sometimes happen). Moss does fine in his role, although he's at the mercy of a script that has him having to be kept out of the way while things get worse for his onscreen wife. Ironside is always good to see, and his small role here is uncharacteristically non-threatening, and Olson and McCarthy both do solid work.

Still/Born is good. It walks a fine line between being considerate to the central issue that spurs on the horror and being in completely bad taste, and I think I would recommend avoiding it if you are one of the many women who have experienced the loss that Mary goes through (or at least give yourself ample time to prepare for your viewing), but it just does enough to keep itself in the right. Only just.

6/10

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Shudder Saturday: Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night II (1987)

MOST slasher movies don't have sequels. Yes, you have the few that are based around modern horror icons (Michael, Jason, Freddy, etc) but the percentage is very low, especially when you consider just how many slasher films were churned out during that golden period. Even fewer slasher movies have sequels as removed from the tone of the first movie as Prom Night. Because if you're expecting this to be a rehash of the first film then you'd better think again.

Mary Lou Maloney (Lisa Schrage) is a fun-loving young woman. We see this from the very first scenes. This upsets her boyfriend, especially when he finds Mary Lou kissing some other guy at prom. One thing leads to another, a prank goes wrong (one of the most common slasher movie tropes), and Mary Lou ends up burning to death in front of everyone at the prom. Many years later, a young woman (Vicki, played by Wendy Lyon) is getting ready for her own prom. She finds a trunk that contains some items that belonged to Mary Lou. Taking them unleashes the vengeful spirit of Mary Lou, unbeknownst to Vicki, who starts have a number of disturbing hallucinations while becoming more and more like Mary Lou in her behaviour.

Written by Ron Oliver (who also did the next movie in the series, and is now quite a prolific director), Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night II is the best kind of silliness. It's entertaining throughout, it has some decent set-piece, and there are plenty of nods to other genre movies (most notably Carrie and A Nightmare On Elm Street). Most of the main characters are named after genre directors - a common way to pay tribute to some of the masters of horror - and the plot somehow manages to feel outrageous and movie-world believable at the same time.

Director Bruce Pittman does a competent job, although there's a lack of any real flair that makes it unsurprising to see that most of his filmography is taken up with TV work, both features and series episodes. Having said that, there are two standout moments in the middle act that Pittman shoots in a way that shows off the very good special effects work. One scene with a blackboard could stand alongside anything from the Elm Street series, and it's just a shame that the finale leaves the more surreal visions aside in favour of some straightforward telekinesis and revenge.

Lyon does well in her role, and she has fun as her personality changes, but Schrage is a tough act to follow in those opening scenes. She's so lively and mesmerising, which makes it easier to enjoy the wickedness that unfolds when you can keep that carefree character in your mind. Justin Louis plays a young man who Vicki is having a relationship with. He does okay in his role, but it's good to see that his father is played by Michael Ironside, who is as fantastic as he usually is. You also get Terri Hawkes as a rival for the Prom Queen title, Brock Simpson as the awkward Josh, and amusing turns from Wendell Smith and Judy Mahbey as Vicki's parents.

Prom Night was a good slasher, not quite up there with the greatest examples of the subgenre, and it has a lot of fans. Well, this may be a sequel to that film in name only but I think it deserves a similar fanbase. It's a lot of fun.

7/10

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Dead By Dawn 2018: Knuckleball (2018)

If I start this review of Knuckleball by immediately telling you what I liked most about it then you may be waiting for a "but" coming. But there is no "but" coming. There is more than one "but" coming. All for the sake of me trying to not be predictable, and failing spectacularly.

So let me tell you what I liked about this simple, streamlined thriller from director Michael Peterson (who also co-wrote the script with Kevin Cockle and Jordan Scott). The central concept, and the central cast. A young boy (played by Luca Villacis) is dropped off by his parents to spend some time with his grandfather (Michael Ironside). His grandfather views this as an opportunity to both spend time with the boy and also get some work done on his property, which is as removed from most other houses as you might expect it to be. Certain things happen, the young lad has to keep himself safe from a major threat to his life, and it doesn't look as if anyone is going to be coming along soon to check on the situation.

I have never yet seen a film starring Michael Ironside that left me wishing someone else had been cast instead, so Knuckleball definitely has that going for it. There's also a fantastic performance from young Villacis, surely a name to keep your eyes peeled for in the future, and Munro Chambers has a lot of fun with his role. There aren't many others in the cast, but they all do well enough with their screentime.

The direction is solid, showing a level of confidence and cine-literacy that add to a rewarding viewing experience, but it's the cracks in the script that start to weaken the overall structure, failings that some might view as minor but that developed into big enough faults to spoil my enjoyment of the movie.

First of all, this is a potentially tense thriller that never feels as tense as it should. That's all down to the writing of the young lead (who is shown to be very smart for his age, which makes a pleasant change but also makes it almost impossible to think he'll ever be truly outmaneuvered) and the writing of the main baddie (who is far too dumb).

Second, there are a couple of reveals that seem to have been set up in a way that should surprise viewers. They don't. They just happen, many viewers will shrug as they see something extra about details that already made them suspicious, and the film then moves forward.

These two criticisms may not seem like any big deal, and I am sure there are others who will enjoy Knuckleball more than I did, but they're enough to drag down what could have been a tight and vicious little thriller. Which leaves us with a limp, tame, sketch of what could have been. It's still a decent watch BUT it could have been so much better.

6/10

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Extreme Prejudice (1987)

I've said it before and I'll say it again, Walter Hill makes movies so manly that if you were to melt them all down and form a shield then you would then have the one viable protection against any attack from Chuck Norris. The man knows how to put a bunch of great actors together and then heap on the violence with the eye of a world-famous dance choreographer. Just watch any one of his movies and try to deny it. Well, okay, most of his movies can be put into that category. Maybe not every single one.

Extreme Prejudice can certainly fall into that category. Crackerjack cast? Check. Great characters and a selection of great lines scattered throughout the script? Check. Violent set-pieces mixing some major bloodletting with moments of beautiful camerawork? Check.

The film, in the first act, feels like two completely different storylines. Nick Nolte plays Sheriff Jack Benteen, a man trying to keep drugs and drug-runners out of his local area. Unfortunately, the main drug baron is Cash Bailey (Powers Boothe), a man who used to be his best friend. Elsewhere, Mighty Michael Ironside leads a team of soldiers in a plan to rob a bank that stores most of Bailey's drug money. These two storylines soon intertwine, with the soldiers affording Benteen an opportunity to hit back, and hit back hard, at Bailey's operation.

As well as Nolte, Boothe and Ironside, Extreme Prejudice has room for Rip Torn, William Forsythe, Clancy Brown and Maria Conchita Alonso in its cast. While their names may not be as recognisable, the likes of Larry B. Scott and Dan Tullis Jr. also do a very good job, easily holding their own alongside some of the heavyweights onscreen.

The script by Harry Kleiner and Deric Washburn is based on a story from John Milius and Fred Rexer, which helps to further solidify those tough credentials, if anyone still had any doubt at this point.

Hill draws great performances from everyone here, with Nolte and Boothe in especially good form, and once again mixes the visceral and strikingly cinematic amongst a varied cast of characters who don't just feel as if they've been shoved into the movie to be shot at.

Fans of the director will have seen this one already, no doubt, but if you've somehow missed it until now (as I had) then do make it a priority. And anyone new to Hill's filmography, all I can say is that you have so many treats ahead of you. Extreme Prejudice is one of them, and as good a place to start as any.

9/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Extreme-Prejudice-DVD-Nick-Nolte/dp/B002TS15K0/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1391202128&sr=8-1&keywords=extreme+prejudice

Children Of The Corn: Revelation (2001)

Continuing the trend of the Children Of The Corn franchise being able to sap every ounce of fun out of the premise and make each instalment in the series a chore to sit through, Children Of The Corn: Revelation quickly announces that it's in line with the standards of the preceding movies by being pretty awful from the very first scene and not improving for the next 80-90 minutes.

Claudette Mink stars as Jamie, a young woman who travels to a small town in search of her grandmother. Gramma has disappeared, you see, and Jamie is worried. It's not long until she's starting to see some strange sights and finding out that not all children are nice and innocent. She does have a local law enforcer (Kyle Cassie) trying to help her, but horror fans will know that things are probably going to get worse before they get any better. Especially with Michael Ironside wandering around as a rambling priest.

I know that this is saying something, but the script by S. J. Smith may be the worst yet in this series (and, god help me, I STILL have a couple of movies to go). It's appalling in almost every aspect. Characters are introduced without care, and sometimes removed from the film in the same way, while the central plot is so piss poor that it's actually insulting. Yes, even after the awfulness of the other Corny movies . . . . . . . THIS is the worst, and most insulting, of them all.

The direction by Guy Magar feels suspiciously like direction from someone who signed on, realised what a piece of shit they were stuck with and just tried their best to get it over with as quickly and painlessly as possible. If only viewers could take the same approach.

Claudette Mink, Kyle Cassie, Mighty Michael Ironside, Troy Yorke, Crystal Lowe and Michael Rogers can't do anything to help polish this turd. The stench is so strong that it sticks to them, making it difficult to tell who actually stinks and who is being made extra stinky by the surrounding movie.

Anyone else who gets to this point in the franchise will, I'm sure, start to wish that the first movie had never been made. Or that the short story had never been written. Or that the planet didn't have corn.

2/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Children-Corn-Revelation-Claudette-Mink/dp/B004WJRV7A/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1381237650&sr=8-1&keywords=children+of+the+corn+revelation