Netflix And Chill: Burnt (2015)

Do you remember when Chef was released back in 2014? It was a delightful little film about someone rediscovering their passion for the thing they do best, and it seemed to have been made by someone rediscovering their passion for the thing they do best. There were moments of fiery anger, and moments of frustration, but it delighted many viewers because it was, at heart, a very sweet and optimistic tale about reconnecting with loved ones, and the world at large, via a passion for food.

Burnt came out a year later. Whatever the intention, and I may be a bit kinder towards it now that I know Steven Knight is one of two people who helped to co-write the screenplay, it feels like a cynical and soulless attempt to rework Chef. If that film was the comforting plate of Cubanos, this is a more expensive plate throwing various ingredients together in a way that simply doesn't make you salivate. There's probably some infused foam on the side.

Bradley Cooper plays Adam Jones, a chef who once had the world at his feet. He disappeared though, after burning many bridges with his addiction issues and his bad behaviour. Now he's back. That doesn't mean that everyone will forgive him, and he still has some debts to pay, but he wants to put a team together good enough to help him get a third Michelin star. Looked at favourably, this is a film about someone figuring out how his behaviour affects others, and how everyone needs to help one another on a journey for perfection. But it's really just about a chef who spectacularly ruined his reputation and career now believing that he deserves to be crowned as one of the very best of the best.

Knight and Michael Kalesniko get a lot of the kitchen chatter right, and they mix in enough mildly interesting characters to help the 101-minute runtime pass by quickly enough. They falter when it comes to the passion though. One or two moments try to remind us of why great chefs love to cook, but they don't work. It's much more believable to simply view Cooper's character as a bloody-minded and hyper-focused narcissist who is ready to throw a tantrum any time things don't go perfectly for him.

It's notable, although perhaps entirely coincidental, that this is the last feature film directed by John Wells, who has spent most of the last decade helming episodes of some fantastic TV shows (including the highly-praised The Pitt). Maybe he also wanted some time enjoying meals made with love instead of meals made to boost someone's ego. Again, it may just be entirely coincidental.

Cooper is fine in the role of Jones, I guess, but is unable to soften him enough to make him a central character that you really care about. Things will either go well or not. Either way, it never feels as if he is the one with the most to lose. Sienna Miller plays a very capable chef, Helene, who suffers throughout the movie by becoming more and more like our lead. Other chefs are played by Omar Sy (who is pretty great), Sam Keeley (who doesn't get enough to do), and Matthew Rhys (playing a discontented rival). Daniel Brühl is good in the role of Tony, the man who ends up bank-rolling the latest restaurant and team of staff, but he allows himself to be far too easily used by someone he should have said good riddance to a long time ago. Uma Thurman is sorely underused, as is Emma Thompson, Alicia Vikander, and Lily James, and, perhaps worst of all, none of the featured dishes ever look like stars in their own right. 

The famous saying goes that "if you can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen", but Burnt proves that you may want to stay out of that area if you also can't stand anything lukewarm and lacking any real flavour. The supporting cast all try hard enough to save this from being a complete waste of your time, but they can't overcome the problem of such an uninteresting core premise and central character. Chef made me hungry for both the food and the passion on display throughout. Burnt made me want to avoid over-priced and over-complicated menus made by narcissistic technicians who often forget simple pleasures in their pursuit of what they perceive to be greatness. 

4/10

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Prime Time: Pretty Lethal (2026)

When I heard that Pretty Lethal was an action movie with ballerinas at the heart of it, and when I saw the poster with the tagline "blood, sweat and tutus", I mistakenly assumed that this would be something along the lines of, well, Ballerina. I already had the film playing out in my head. A group of innocent-looking ballerinas working together to successfully complete one deadly mission after another, probably using their skillset and grace to their major advantage. I was a bit off, but not entirely incorrect.

Pretty Lethal DOES have ballerinas using their skillset and grace to their advantage, but these are actual ballerinas. They're not trained killers. They just end up in a situation that forces them to become inventive and fight back against a large number of armed and menacing men.

It all starts with a bus breaking down. Our featured dancers end up sheltering in an inn, one owned and run by Devora Kasimer (Uma Thurman). A bad man is embarrassed by a woman, which leads to death, and that's what leads to the ballerinas all being kept in place until it's time to get rid of them. Once they realise how serious their situation is, however, the ballerinas find a way to dance around some of the baddies and weaponise their ballet moves.

With two women at the helm, (this was written by Kate Freund, who also has a small role in front of the camera, and directed by Vicky Jewson) there's definitely something running through Pretty Lethal that allows it to feel just a bit different from the many other films it could have been. It's bloody and violent once everything kicks off, but it's also very much about women supporting one another, and reminds viewers more than once about the pain and dedication required to become a celebrated ballerina. There's a really nice balance of the masculine and feminine here, perhaps inevitable due to the main premise, but also nurtured by both Freund and Jewson.

The cast all help too, particularly the youngsters who have to fight for their lives while wearing tutus and looking woefully out of their depth . . . until they show a natural talent for despatching brawny henchmen. The main five are played by Maddie Ziegler, Lana Condor, Avantika, Millicent Simmonds, and Iris Apatow, and they're all fantastic at being believably frightened, but also determined to fight back, for the sake of themselves and those right alongside them. Thurman has a lot of fun portaying a heavily-accented villain with a real appreciation for the discipline of ballet, Tamás Szabó Sipos is the main instigator of all the trouble, and easy to hate as he spends a lot of time trying to stay protected under the cloak of his father's reputation. 

If someone else hadn't already described this as "reasonably en pointe" then you know that I would have rushed to use that great pun. I was too late, unfortunately, and I don't think anyone is waiting to hear this referred to as Tutu Fast Tutu Furious. It's maybe not quite as packed with violence and death as some would like, but it does maintain a good amount of energy and momentum once everything kicks off. If you're looking for a new action flick to help you pass just under 90 minutes then you shouldn't be too disappointed if you give this your time. 

7/10

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Mubi Monday: The House That Jack Built (2018)

Another movie from Lars von Trier, another expected cloud of controversy and divided opinions. My own relationship with the man has turned around completely from how it used to be. I loved both Dancer In The Dark and Dogville but have strongly disliked most of his output over the past decade. Yet, to his credit, I still end up keen to see what he will present to us next. And I still enjoy hearing about how his work tends to upset people.

The House That Jack Built stars Matt Dillon as Jack, a serial killer who is relating the story of his "highlights" to a figure named Verge AKA Virgil (Bruno Ganz). Jack is supposed to be smart enough to have been killing people for a number of years, despite being unable to behave normally in most situations that place him anywhere near other witnesses, but he also wants to be caught. It's just a matter of time, which may mean that Jack doesn't ever get to finish building a house he has attempted on a few different occasions.

The first thing that struck me about this movie, after all that I'd heard about it, is how funny it was. This is Von Trier having more fun than he's had in some time. Oh, he's always had dark humour running through his material but this brings it right to the surface and is all the better for it. If you're worried about this being a bleak serial killer movie then the opening scenes should allay those reservations (although there are moments of violence that are quite brutal).

The second thing that struck me was how unfortunately hampered Dillon was in the main role. I really like Dillon in most of the roles he has played throughout his career, and this could have been a stellar turn from him, but he's not that good here. It's not entirely his fault. Von Trier has written a script, working with Jenie Hallund once again, that crucially can't decide on how it wants to portray the central character. If he's precise and smart then that isn't evidenced by the scenes we are shown. If he's just an ordinary guy who has remarkable luck in his chosen way of life then let us see some more everyday moments. Putting Dillon in the lead role and then not allowing him to use his talents to portray someone who could possibly be a much more effective charmer and killer is a huge flaw.

A lot of the other aspects of the film work, although we have the usual excesses and moments of self-indulgence from a director now so far up his own backside that he's probably created a whole universe in there, complete with planets populated by people who worship him. The runtime is about 150 minutes, there are tableaux moments, and some more unnecessary slow motion that I, once again, have to cede looks great but would be ridiculed if this was a film from certain other directors who have been known to overuse that trick.

Although this is really all about Dillon's character, decent supporting turns come from Uma Thurman,  Siobhan Fallon Hogan, Sofie Gråbøl, and Riley Keough. None of them are onscreen long enough, especially Hogan or Keough, but they all do well to make a lasting impression long after the film is finished,

If you want a gritty serial killer movie then you have to look elsewhere. You can also look elsewhere if you want some black comedy with your multiple murders. But this is the only place where you can find the two colliding with the artistic sensibilities of Mr Lars von Trier. That will be enough to ensure that some people never watch it. I'm actually pleased that I decided to give it a go.

7/10

You can buy Jack's house here.
Americans can rent it here.

Percy Jackson & The Lightning Thief (2010)

Percy Jackson (Logan Lerman) is a teenager with his share of teenage problems. His mother (Catherine Keener) is living with a douchebag (Joe Pantoliano). He seems to have dyslexia and ADD, and only finds real peace when holding his breath at the bottom of the swimming pool, being timed by his friend, Grover (Brandon T. Jackson). It turns out that Percy is actually a half-blood, the result of a tryst between his mother and his biological father, the god Poseidon (Kevin McKidd). That's why he has dyslexia (his brain is actually designed to read writings in Ancient Greek) and ADD (he's impulsive and good in a fight). And, of course, that's why he likes the water. It's also, unfortunately, why he ends up as the main suspect when Zeus (Sean Bean) has his lightning bolt stolen. The clock starts ticking as Percy learns about himself, learns about many others like him at Camp Half-Blood (including Annabeth, played by Alexandra Daddario), and plans to somehow find, and return, the lightning bolt before the gods start fighting one another. Oh, and he also has to save his mother from Hades.

Based on a popular series of books by Rick Riordan, Percy Jackson & The Lightning Thief is very enjoyable family entertainment that should please fans of the Harry Potter franchise. In fact, that's obviously what everyone was thinking when Chris Columbus was hired as the director. The script from Craig Titley gets all of the information across and paces things perfectly in between some great set-pieces, but there's just something in the execution of the material that stops this from being as great as it should be. It's always entertaining, and there's a lot of fun derived from the updating of the Greek myths, but it suffers greatly, I think, from a weak finale. Especially after the fantastic characters that our plucky group have already encountered before they realise who the real lightning thief is.

Lerman, Jackson and Daddario are all good enough in the main roles, but a lot of the fun here comes from the stars having fun in the supporting roles. Okay, Bean and McKidd are as serious and weighty as they need to be, but Pierce Brosnan is memorable in his supporting turn, Uma Thurman is fantastic as Medusa, and Steve Coogan and Rosario Dawson play well off each other as Hades and Persephone, respectively. Jake Abel seems a bit bland as Luke, a fellow camp resident who provides a lot of help as Percy and his friends prepare for their quest.

All of the choices here, from special effects to music to camerawork, are predictable enough. This is safe family entertainment. It has some grandiose moments, but always works hard to get back to focusing on the teenagers and their teenage ways of working out solutions to their problems (this isn't me being sarcastic, I'm just specifying that the film constantly keeps its target demographic in mind). Unfortunately, despite trying hard, it's probably not cool enough for most teenagers to enjoy. That may explain why the box office performance was pretty disappointing, and it may explain why I like the movie more than many other film fans I know.

Because if there's one thing I know, it's that I have never, ever been cool.

7/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Percy-Jackson-Lightning-Thief-Monsters/dp/B00EE5BWTU/ref=sr_1_5?s=dvd&ie=UTF8&qid=1391527616&sr=1-5&keywords=percy+jackson