Pet Sematary (2019)

You probably already know all about Pet Sematary. You may have already seen this movie. Or you saw the trailer, that gave away one big twist that the film used to distance itself from the 1989 original. Or you saw the 1989 original (lots of people view that one with fondness). Or maybe, just maybe, you read the book before any of the movies appeared. I was in a peak Stephen King period at that point in my life, devouring many of his works, and read it as soon as I could. I was old enough to enjoy it and still young enough to somehow miss the obvious fact that it was the ultimate way for King to rework one of his favourite ever tales, "The Monkey's Paw".

Jason Clarke and Amy Seimetz are Louis and Rachel, a married couple with two children, Ellie (Jeté Laurence) and Gage (played by twins Hugo and Lucas Lavoie). They have just moved in to a new home, somewhere that seems potentially idyllic for them. If it wasn't for that road nearby that sometimes has large trucks hurtling down it. There's a friendly neighbour (Jud, played by John Lithgow), at least, and he is the one with some extra information when they discover that somewhere on their land is the titular "pet sematary". Tragedy strikes. The nearby ground has powers. Sometimes dead is better. All of those three things will converge in the second half of the film.

It's a shame that Matt Greenberg helped to write the screenplay for 1408, one of the better Stephen King adaptations in the last fifteen years. A shame because that may lead you to believe that his work here, fleshed out by Jeff Buhler, will be good. It's really not. In fact, it's ridiculously lazy in places. Whether making changes to the source material that don't seem to be for the better or failing to shake off the spectre of the original film, Pet Sematary shambles from one bad decision to the next. It's telling to say that some of the better moments here feel so enjoyable because they could easily have come from any late '80s/early 90s Stephen King movie adaptation.

The casting is the best thing here. And that's working around the fact that the lead actor is Jason Clarke, a man who surely owes his career to being occasionally confused for Joel Edgerton by harried casting agents. I've seen him do decent work onscreen but he's rarely the best choice for any lead role, and doesn't have much charisma that you expect to find in most leading men. Fortunately, Seimetz is much better, and you have Lithgow doing the best he can to put his own spin on the character of Jud (no small feat when you remember how great Fred Gwynne was in the original). The children are also very good, with Laurence given more opportunity to shine than either of the Lavoie twins. And kudos to the cats involved (oh, animal lovers be warned, the death of a cat is the real turning point in the plot).

Directors Kevin Kölsch and Dennis Widmyer have done some great work together. Starry Eyes remains a film I will happily recommend to any horror fans after something different. Seeing them churn out something so ill-judged and poor is slightly depressing. It made a profit, although I am not sure if it was a good enough profit to please those who keep count or just enough to ensure people kept their jobs, so I am sure that they will get more work after this. I just hope they go back to doing something of their own creation.

The original novel or the 1989 movie, take your pick. Both of those options are much better than sitting through this. And I couldn't even be bothered to mention the new incarnation of Zelda (played this time by Alyssa Brooke Levine), all too familiar to fans of the original, but also with another pointless change that adds nothing to this empty experience.

3/10

You can buy the movie here.
Americans can buy it here.

The Sacrament (2013)

Ti West may well be the single most frustrating writer-director working in independent horror today. After making such a great impact with The House Of The Devil, he seems to have gone downhill with every subsequent release, constantly squandering his potential and making it increasingly hard to put his name forward as the shining light in horror that he could have been.

The Sacrament doesn't rectify the situation. It's done (when convenient) in a documentary style, but with opening credits to seemingly ensure, I guess, that the illusion is never once entirely believable. A. J. Bowen and Joe Swanberg are two young men reporting for Vice who tag along with a man named Patrick (Kentucker Audley) after hearing about the strange events concerning his sister, Caroline (Amy Seimetz). It turns out that she's cleaned up her life, after many problem years, and is living in an idyllic community overseen by a religious leader, Father (Gene Jones). Is paradise on Earth possible, or is everything not quite as it seems when the visitors start to look beyond the surface of this peaceful place?

Where to begin with my complaints about this movie? Well, I guess I could always start with what I actually liked about it. I thought Bowen was pretty damn good, as he so often is. Jones was alright, although not captivating enough to believe that so many people would flock to, and stay with, him. And Seimetz did well in her role. The general premise is a good one, with the first half playing out in a way that sets up a potentially brilliant back end. And there are individual scenes that are pretty bloody intense, such as the moment in which a desperate mother does what she thinks is best to protect her daughter from whatever might be in store for her.

The rest of the movie is either clumsy, lazy (which seems to be an unfortunate trait that West carries between each movie lately), or just ill-advised, at best. The opening credits are really the first warning sign that this is a director about to utilise a style he either clearly doesn't understand or doesn't want to bother with for the duration of the film. By the time we get to the second half, and the scenes during which the camerawork is clearly not being controlled by any of our main characters, then you just end up wondering what the whole point was. Well, that's if you can stop thinking about how unbelievable everything gets as the final third moves from drama into horror territory. Character motivations and actions make little sense, the tension dissipates just as it should be ratcheting up by degrees, and it eventually becomes a bit of a chore to get to the end credits.

There's also that problem with Jones, a problem I already mentioned above. He's good enough in his performance, but it's not the right performance for the role, one that is also sorely treated by a weak script. If this is a man who can gain numerous followers and rule over them in an idyllic commune then he must come across as someone who can sell veggie-burgers to vampires. Jones can't manage that. He never seems to have enough presence, or (worst of all) the courage of his convictions.

There's almost enough here to make me like this movie, that's the most frustrating thing about it. Once again, West has teased me with his potential before retreating into his comfort zone. And the worst thing is . . . . . . . I'll still hold out hope for his next movie. Just as I did for this one.

4/10

http://www.amazon.com/Sacrament-Blu-ray-Joe-Swanberg/dp/B00KGA87CW/ref=sr_1_2?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1412432986&sr=1-2&keywords=the+sacrament