Confessions From The David Galaxy Affair (1979)

Another Mary Millington vehicle directed by Willy Roe and written by George Evans, Confessions From The David Galaxy Affair is at least, similar to The Playbirds, a piece of adult entertainment that attempts to thread the minimal semblance of a plot through things.

Alan Lake plays David Galaxy, a playboy lover man who finds himself in hot water when he starts to be investigated by Chief Inspector Evans (Glynn Edwards). The police are wanting to know where Alan was on the day of a robbery, and he needs to get someone to give him an alibi. But that could turn out to be a lot harder than expected, with Alan not really surrounded by good friends. He does have people rooting for him, however, when it comes to his sexual exploits, especially when he is challenged to please a woman (Millington) who is said to have never before had an orgasm.

If tweaked here and there, this could have been a comedic crime paper with some enjoyable sauciness. You could have had more flashback scenes, and more time spent with Lake trying to keep his head above water. But it is sold on Millington’s name, which means you get the sexual escapades throughout, interrupted by some of the crime caper plot.

Roe directs just fine, for what the film is aiming to do, and the script has some minor highlights, despite being massively problematic here and there. But I cannot be sure how many of the worst moments are down to the script and how many are down to choices made by actors. Lake seems to be enjoying himself when he is allowed to change his character for a couple of scenes, portraying both an Asian gentlemen and a gay man at different times, with the sensitivity and nuance that you might expect from a film like this. None.

Lake isn’t bad in the lead role though, and somehow stays quite likeable as he skips from one but of nookie to the next. Edwards is good to see, and brings some weight to things, never allowing you to doubt that he is serious in wanting to apprehend the lead. Millington has one key scene, obviously, and does what you expect, and I enjoyed the small amount of screentime allotted to Diana Dors and Bernie Winters. There are other people involved - Anthony Booth, Kenny Lynch, Milton Reid, Sally Faulkner, Rosemary England, etc - but none of those make as strong an impression as those already mentioned (even if Faulkner is involved in an amusing scene in which she is offended by David breaking wind in bed).

Another movie of this kind, and from this time, that is hard to imagine keeping enough people pleased for the runtime, with the softer sex scenes, clumsy humour, and plot strand about the criminal investigation, it ends up being a bit more enjoyable to everyone who may simply be watching it nowadays to satisfy their curiosity.

4/10

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Prime Time: Adventures Of A Taxi Driver (1976)

You know what it's like, don't cha. You want to have a great life, get a bit of cash in your pocket, get a nice little bird to have some fun with every now and again, and generally live a bleedin' charmed life without any worries. But you are living at your mum's gaff, you have an on-off girlfriend who wants something serious, while you're just keeping her as an option in between pursuing others, and most of your taxi fares end with you owing money because you got your head turned by some nice piece of skirt.

No, I've not regressed. The paragraph above sums up the outlook of the main character in Adventures Of A Taxi Driver, a very successful British sex comedy from the 1970s that came along after the popular "Confessions Of..." series and the much more enjoyable Eskimo Nell (if you ever explore these movies then that is one I recommend you make a top priority).

Barry Evans plays the main character, you won't be surprised to learn that he is a taxi driver, Joe, in a film that also has room for Robert Lindsay, Judy Geeson, Diana Dors, and one or two special cameo appearances. The opening minutes, with an amusingly sarcastic litany of praise for the good ol' British cabbie, bodes well for what you might get from the rest of the film, but things quickly go from bad to worse as viewers are left in the care of a cheeky chappie supposedly able to charm the ladies. He seems more like either a predator or a spoiled child for most of the runtime, and everything becomes even more tiresome when you get a final act that puts the main character in the middle of a robbery that allows him to be the best of a bad bunch (I suppose).

Very much a product of its time, this doesn't hold up well at all. Director Stanley A. Long, who also came up with the idea that was turned into a screenplay by Suzanne Mercer, a frequent collaborator, puts everything together like a late-night comedy sketch show with licence to show some gratuitous nudity. You get the married woman who is interrupted by her oblivious husband while she tries to enjoy the company of the cabbie, you get one young woman who seems suicidal until she starts responding to the warmth of Joe (yes, it is as horribly uncomfortable as it sounds), and you get the obviously hilarious moment in which Joe doesn't realise his latest passenger is a female impersonator. There's nudity and a nun, a happy-go-lucky hooker who likes to treat her clients while being driven around in the cab, and more.

Evans is at least okay in the main role. It's not easy to make his character any more appealing, considering the script working against him, but he tries his best. Geeson is as lovely as ever, Lindsay is there to often be a sounding board, and Adrienne Posta is horribly mistreated as Carol, the woman who Joe thinks is getting far too clingy. On the plus side, she at least gets to sing the main title song (even if it's not a very good one).

I used to hate this. I remember rating it even lower the last time I saw it, and I have no idea why, or how, I watched it before. But now I can't help view it with a little more affection. The attitude on display is still horrendous, the comedy doesn't really work, but it's just as fascinating a a number of other British movies from this time, many of them trying to make a splash at the box office by translating saucy postcard humour into something a bit more daring for adults to enjoy at their local cinemas.

4/10

The print currently available on Amazon Prime (UK, not sure about other territories) is actually very good.