Lemmy (2010)

Ian Fraser Kilmister was born on December 24th 1945. He grew into a man best known for his long hair and beard, his individualism, his followers and his ability to endure experiences that would kill many mere mortals. He could have almost been a new messiah for the 20th-21st century. Instead, he became Lemmy.

This documentary looks at the man, the icon, the personality that Lemmy is. Adored by so many people around the world, it soon becomes clear that if you think of Lemmy as just that guy who had a hit with the Ace Of Spades (an absolutely classic tune) then you don't know how many lives he has touched and what a huge influence he has been on the musical landscape. There is a lot here that will be familiar to you if you've seen Lemmy in any other context - the fashion statements remain somehow cool even when they shouldn't, the Jack Daniels and the cigarettes are always in hand or nearby, the gravelly voice and self-deprecation is on constant display - but as the documentary settles in and starts to look deeper at just what makes the seemingly-indestructible Lemmy tick it becomes quite an eye-opener and a great reminder of why the rocker deserves all of the praise that he receives.

Greg Olliver and Wes Orshoski do a fantastic job because in the first few minutes of the documentary you realise that Lemmy is such a larger than life figure and such a unique individual that he could easily become a parody. Somehow he avoids that pitfall but it's only when you have the time to realise that he lives his life the way that he claims to live it. He's not putting on any act just for the public, he talks the talk AND walks the walk. Which is why you have to respect the guy, grudgingly or otherwise.

Dave Grohl, Ozzy Osbourne, Billy Bob Thornton, members of Metallica, members of Megadeth, members of Guns 'n' Roses, Peter Hook, Jarvis Cocker, Steve Vai, Alice Cooper, members of The Damned, Joan Jett, Mick Jones, Ice-T and many, many more people appear onscreen to sing the praises of an unassuming man who has been in the industry for over 40 years and who has lost none of the passion for wanting to make great music since being inspired many years ago by people like Little Richard, The Beatles, Jimi Hendrix and Elvis Presley.

Lemmy works almost perfectly as a documentary about an iconic figure, it reveals plenty about the individual and makes you see him as others do. Sadly, it also feels as if a lot is missed out. It may be the case that a full look at the life of Lemmy would require a 24-hour camera crew feeding live to a website that would also include archival material, that's the case with every living legend. Which is my way of saying that the film isn't perfect but it does what it sets out to do superbly - reminding every viewer that the man at the centre of the documentary IS a living legend.

8/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Lemmy-Blu-ray/dp/B00478P21S/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1342703526&sr=8-3

Terror Firmer (1999)

To judge Terror Firmer by any standard movie criteria is to do a disservice both to yourself and to the movie. Terror Firmer is just an absolutely bonkers, overly gory, hilarious celebration of all that is Troma from start to finish. When a movie has been running for mere seconds and shows someone having their leg ripped off then you know that things aren't going to be subtle and insightful. When, moments later, a woman has her unborn child ripped out of her stomach then you know that things just went way off the scale of anything that society would label as acceptable or tolerable. And, if you keep watching the whole movie, you realise that you're glad that Troma keep on keeping on with their particular brand of low budget lunacy.

The actual story revolves around a vicious killer who is causing a number of disruptions on the set of the latest Troma movie. Cast and crew members start to die and police want to find the culprit as soon as possible, obviously. Which all just means that viewers get to see one crazy death sequence after another, linked by numerous references to other Troma movies, plenty of gags (both lame and pretty good) and occasional moments in which characters discuss the merits of independent filmmaking and how spirited it is to keep breaking taboos and pushing boundaries.

To many people, this film will rank amongst the very worst that they could be forced to watch. For others, like myself, it will easily rank up there with the very best inspired insanity that Troma can provide. Lloyd Kaufman gets to sit in the director's chair and the script is based on the book that he co-wrote with James Gunn entitled "All I Need To Know About Filmmaking I Learned From The Toxic Avenger". He also stars as the blind director of the film within the film. So, hopefully, you don't mind his particular style of overacting and mugging to the camera.

The rest of the cast more than makes up for any weaknesses in Kaufman's repertory. Will Keenan is especially great as a man quite obsessed with pickling, Trent Haaga is good fun (n.b. Haaga would go on to direct Keenan in the superb Chop - well worth checking out), Alyce LaTourelle is a lot of fun and also very attractive and then we get the great Debbie Rochon, the legendary Ron Jeremy, the equally legendary Lemmy and many other familiar faces dotted throughout the supporting cast.

It's an absolutely hilarious slice of distasteful entertainment. Or it could be the worst thing you ever see.

8/10

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Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger IV (2000)

Within the first 10-15 minutes of the fourth Toxic Avenger movie we get to "enjoy" a gang known as the Diaper Mafia crashing into a classroom full of "special young adults" and laying waste to as many as possible. There's bloodshed, gratuitous nudity, a sickening amount of bodily functions and an absolute lack of anything that even comes close to being politically correct. And so I knew that I was going to enjoy this film a lot more than the third movie.

The Toxic Avenger (David Mattey) this time ends up in Amortville, the evil alternate version of Tromaville, while his place in Tromaville is taken by The Noxious Offender (David Mattey). Good ol' Toxie tries to put right a number of wrongs and find his way home while The Noxious Offender blackens the good name of our herois monster by doing horrid things like ripping the arms off the police chief and quickly reducing the population of Tromaville by means of violent death. He also thinks himself lucky when he eventually finds his way back to the trailer that Toxie calls home, complete with the blind, and now pregnant, wife (played this time by Heidi Sjursen).

Lloyd Kaufman directs this outing on his own but there are a LOT of people responsible for the script, which shows in the sheer amount of rapid-fire tasteless gags, references to other movies and unsubtle satire. Amazingly, it all comes together to produce something that's just a whole lot of shits and giggles (and, yes, that comment can be taken almost literally).

While I didn't really enjoy the fact that so many fart sound effects were placed all over the soundtrack and while I didn't always like the focus on moments featuring faeces, sexual abuse or ejaculations I was never bored and was actually laughing from beginning to end. Admittedly, even someone as thick-skinned as I am couldn't quite believe how far flung from the PC world we inhabit the Troma crew had gone but it's as refreshing to find nowadays as it is juvenile and objectionable.

The cast all either play dumb or get nekkid (or both) with gleeful abandon and there are a number of cameo roles for people like Lemmy (who snagged himself a better role in Tromeo & Juliet but has some fun lines here), Corey Feldman, Ron Jeremy and James Gunn.

If you're a Troma fan who also happens to love films like The Wizard Of Oz and Citizen Kane then you may well love this. If you're a fan of proper cinema who happens to love the aforementioned movies and has never seen two babies in a womb fighting each other with mops then you may well want to avoid this for the duration of your entire life.

6/10.

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