June-Claude Van Damme: Nowhere To Run (1993)

The funniest thing about revisiting the filmography of Jean-Claude Van Damme is finding out how others view his films, and also finding out that some of them weren't the popular hits that the younger version of me thought they were. Take this film, for example. I thought Nowhere To Run was an easy success for JCVD. It wasn't. It made money, but it didn't make lots and lots of money.

The plot sees Van Damme playing an escaped prisoner who ends up being in the right place at the right time for one single mother (Rosanna Arquette) who is being given a hard time by developers who want her to sell her home and stop getting in the way of a potential gold mine (metaphorically). Joss Ackland is the main baddie, but he uses Ted Levine to oversee the actual dirty work, and also makes use of a local law enforcement officer (Lonnie, played by Edward Blatchford).

Based on a script by Joe Eszterhas, Leslie Bohem, and Randy Feldman, Nowhere To Run is simply an updated riff on Shane, with extra moments that allow the leading man to either take his clothes off or ride about on a motorbike and look cool (or allow his stunt double to do that anyway, which is how it appears in a number of scenes). The pacing works well, despite this being far from the most action-heavy of Van Damme's movies from this time, and the characters are developed just enough beyond the paper-thin to help you care about how things pan out.

It helps that the cast all do a good job. As well as the two leads warming up to one another throughout, leading to some gratuitous nudity and sexy sex time, you get decent turns from Ackland and Blatchford, and a scene-stealing performance from Levine, who benefits the most from the script. You also get a couple of great child performances, from Kieran Culkin and Tiffany Taubman, both of whom latch on to Van Damme with an ease and innocence that kids can have within their first encounter with an adult they decide is okay by them.

Director Robert Harmon does decidedly okay work, but it's a shame that he didn't decide to shake things up a bit, either in terms of some more creative acton sequences or in terms of giving more time to character moments for Arquette and Levine, the former underserved and the latter having so much fun that viewers could have been rewarded by having more of him.

Nowhere To Run remains an enjoyable slice of entertainment, and Van Damme exudes enough charisma here to make it feel completely natural that the film was adapted to fit him into the lead role, but it's also very disposable, and ultimately easily forgettable.

6/10

The disc be here.
Americans can purchase it here.

Tango & Cash (1989)

In 2010 The Expendables came along to make action movie fans practically drool with excitement from the opening scene to the closing credits. It was a Sylvester Stallone action movie that catered to fans of a certain kind of dumb fun, fans of 80s action that saw the collateral damage go through the roof as people like Stallone, Schwarzenegger, Willis, etc, did whatever it took to get the bad guy. The Expendables was a homage to those films. The funny thing is that Stallone already starred in the ultimate homage to the 80s action movie, it's just that he actually did it in the 1980s before the affection had grown into nostalgia and before sly wit (no pun intended) could help viewers deal with the many cheesy moments.

For anyone doubting that this is the ultimate homage to 80s action movies I present the following facts. The film stars Stallone and Kurt Russell, two superb stars of the decade (in fact, the Russell role was originally intended to be played by Patrick Swayze, which may have caused all time and matter to grind to a halt in 1989). The main villain is played by Jack Palance but there are also roles for James Hong and, a man synonymous with the 1980s, the late, great Brion James. Oh, Robert Z'Dar also plays a hardass baddie. Is that 80s enough for you yet?

No!! Well, just check out who else we have onscreen in non-villainous roles. A young and beautiful Teri Hatcher is captivating. Geoffrey Lewis is great in his small role. And then there's Michael J. Pollard, who was also so great in Roxanne and a number of other movies.

The script is full of typical buddy-cop moments as Tango (Stallone) and Cash (Russell) are thrown together, framed and subsequently have to spend the rest of the movie throwing snappy insults at each other while trying to prove their innocence and nail the bad guys. Police brutality is the norm when these guys want to get results, plenty of things explode and our heroes get things down through a mix of casual violence and unbelievable luck.

Want some more 80s moments? How about Stallone replying to some cop saying that he thinks he's Rambo with the line "Rambo . . . . . . . is a pussy"? Or even the great little "I hate Danish" line that provides a sly dig at his past relationship with Brigitte Nielsen.

Tango & Cash wasn't a very easy shoot, with director Andrey Konchalovsky being replaced towards the end of the shoot by Albert Magnoli and the script by Randy Feldman not being completed by the time that principal photography began. I'm not sure what the film resembled once the shooting was over but it was shaped and polished by editor Stuart Baird into what you see today, and I like it.

It's ridiculous, completely implausible, and totally enjoyable. If you love anything about the 1980s then you will surely love Tango & Cash. Oh, and the music is by Harold Faltermeyer. Oh yes. The ultimate homage to the movies spawned by the decade of excess, even if it wasn't intended that way.

8/10

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