Jurassic World Dominion (2022)

I had heard a variety of opinions on Jurassic World Dominion before I finally got around to seeing it, which meant I was perhaps better prepared for it than I otherwise might have been. I heard that Chris Pratt tries to defuse every dinosaur encounter by doing that hand gesture he does (true). I heard that some of the connective tissue to the first film was very tenuous (also true). I heard that there was a disappointing lack of actual dinosaurs, with them being pushed aside in favour of a plot about dangerous bugs (tosh and piffle).

Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard) and Owen (Chris Pratt) live in a cabin in the woods, being parental figures to Maisie Lockwood (Isabella Sermon). They try to stress to Isabella how important it is that she stays hidden away, due to the value of her DNA, but that doesn’t work. In a double-whammy of villainy, both Maisie and a new baby raptor (Blue’s baby, no less) are kidnapped and taken away to the main villain of the piece. I won’t name them, but it is obvious from the very start. Meanwhile, Ellie Sattler (Laura Dern) is investigating the source of some dangerous new species of locust, which leads to her dragging Alan Grant (Sam Neill) along to the HQ of a company called Biosyn, headed up by Lewis Dodgson (Campbell Scott). Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum) works at Biosyn, but he would like someone to get proof of what he suspects are misdeeds. 

With director Colin Trevorrow returning to direct this instalment of the franchise, continuing the story he worked out with Derek Connolly, shaped into a finalised screenplay by himself and Emily Carmichael, this feels like exactly what it is, a film that is part standard blockbuster spectacle and part celebration of an enduring modern franchise. I wasn’t too impressed by the first Jurassic World movie, and I initially felt the same about Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (a film I have subsequently viewed in a more favourable light), but maybe I have been too harsh, perhaps because I have always been hoping to experience the thrill of that Spielberg original all over again.

This is a really solid slice of dino-filled action. It may have a lengthy runtime, but it doesn’t feel overlong. Set-pieces and exciting moments are sprinkled throughout, with the sequence set in Malts being one of the most entertaining blockbuster moments I have seen in some time, the locust sub-plot adds some more tension (and, more importantly, provides a good reason for everyone ending up together in the same place), and there’s a feeling of plausibility in this world that now has dinosaurs free to roam certain areas of our planet. 

Dern, Neill, and Goldblum are very welcome in their reprised roles, all three settling into a comfortable rapport with one another, and also working well when they eventually encounter the new characters. Pratt and Howard are just fine, although they have never been as good in the lead roles as other options we could have had, and Scott has fun as the typical rich guy who wants to play god in ways that might have unforeseen consequences. There are also enjoyable performances from DeWanda Wise (playing Kayla, a pilot who ends up helping our main characters) and Mamoudou Athie (as Ramsay, the nervous young man tasked with showing Sattler and Grant around Biosyn). The one sour note is, unfortunately, Sermon. As decent as she was in the last film, she feels completely out of place and unconvincing here. Perhaps the writing also works against her, or maybe her performance just feels more full of affectation now she is a bit older and a bit more self-conscious.

The other main performances come from the dinosaurs, of course, and they are as good as ever. You get another enjoyable variety of creatures, with some of them being VERY cute (baby triceratops WILL make you go “awwwwww”), and the blending of animatronics and CGI is pretty flawless throughout.

What more could you want? The score brings in the obvious cues when expected, there are some fun lines of dialogue that work on a meta level without stopping everything to wink at the audience, and it once again allows our old pal, the t-rex, to steal a couple of scenes and remind everyone of how much we all love to gape at a t-rex. 

8/10

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The Commuter (2018)

One of a number of generic action vehicles that director Jaume Collet-Sera made with star Liam Neeson, The Commuter has very little to recommend it. And yet, surprisingly, there are treats hidden away within it.

Neeson plays Michael, an ex-cop who now works for a life insurance company. Well . . . worked for them. He is let go, which means his train ride home may well be his last commute for a while. He ends up engaged in conversation with a woman (Vera Farmiga) who makes him a hypothetical offer of thousands of dollars to identify an individual on the train. The offer is less hypothetical than it first appears, however, and Michael ends up trying to find this person while also trying to save the lives of everyone on the train.

As preposterous and predictable as you think it’s going to be, The Commuter is also, like a number of other Neeson-led action vehicles, easy entertainment when you want something pretty brisk and silly. A lot of that is thanks to Neeson himself, of course, and many people will know in advance whether they want to see another action thriller barely indistinguishable from the many other action thrillers he has made over the past decade.

The script is nonsense. It’s hard to believe that three people - Ryan Engle, Philip de Blasi, and Byron Willinger - came together to complete this. Engle is the one with a few other decent titles to his name, including another Neeson vehicle, but this is very much “paint by numbers” around the star, and Collet-Sera directs it as one. There’s one genuinely tense moment, involving Neeson being stuck under the train at one point, but everything else plays out in a way that people will find completely unsurprising. Which may make it a comfortable viewing choice, as it was for me. 

The supporting cast is where you get some treats to make this worth your time. As well as Farmiga, there’s a supporting role for her long-time onscreen hubby (Ed Warren), Patrick Wilson. Sam Neill has a very small role, and he is always welcome. Jonathan Banks is as good as ever, as are both Andy Nyman and Florence Pugh. Clara Lago, Ella-Rae Smith, Roland Møller, Colin McFarlane, Kobna Holdbrook-Smith, and Adam Nagaitis all do well enough, playing a variety of characters put in peril by the wild scheme that has Neeson at the heart of it.

Absolutely inessential, absolutely forgettable, and absolutely ridiculous, this is also a film that is absolutely easy to choose to watch when you are searching for something that won’t challenge you or cause you to overthink anything. You could even watch it during your own commute, if you have the time. 

4/10

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Prime Time: Memoirs Of An Invisible Man (1992)

Arguably the most atypical movie in the filmography of John Carpenter, Memoirs Of An Invisible Man is very much a studio movie/Chevy Chase vehicle that just happens to have been directed by the horror maestro. It's an interesting one to watch, and some of the special effects remain impressive (while some others don't), but it's important to go into it not expecting a Carpenter movie.

Chase plays Nick Halloway, a slick office guy who finds his world turned upside down when he's caught up in an accident that renders him invisible. This makes it more difficult to continue his new relationship with the lovely Alice Monroe (Daryl Hannah). It also makes him a target for some shady government agent types (headed up by David Jenkins, played by Sam Neill).

Utilising noirish narration throughout most of the story, and paced briskly enough to get you along to the fun of the invisibility, Memoirs Of An Invisible Man is a consistent mix of the old and the new. It gets to restrict the need for hundreds of special effects by showing many scenes with Chase visible, although it often cuts to show the reality of how his invisible self is manipulating the environment or people around him, and the plot focuses just as much on the chase aspect than it does on the problem of no longer being able to see parts of your own body.

The script, credited to Robert Collector, Dana Olsen, and William Goldman (who has never seen the finished product and doesn't know how much of his material was left in there), is a bit of a mess. It's good in the way it moves from one (non)sight gag to another but not so good when weaving between the standard thriller aspects and the moments between Chase and Hannah.

Speaking of the leads, they don't do a bad job. Chase, however, would have been better playing this as audiences expected him to, more comedically. There are scenes that come close to capturing that cheeky twinkle he does so well, and then it's all undone by the need to have him acting seriously, either opposite Hannah or Neill, who is entertainingly ruthless in his bad guy role. Solid support comes from Michael McKean, Stephen Tobolowsky (not onscreen nearly enough), and Jim Norton (mentioned because Father Ted may wish to see "Bishop Brennan" in a John Carpenter movie).

The direction is surprisingly flat, you can tell that this was a paycheck gig for Carpenter, who doesn't provide the soundtrack either. Put this into a player without showing anyone the opening credits and I would defy anyone to put the director's name to it. That doesn't stop it from being fun, and Carpenter does well with the variety of effects (showing a wide array of previously-unseen visuals, as far as I am aware, like an invisible man smoking, and also, at one point, vomiting). It's just not a film with any fingerprints on it.

While not worth putting high on your list of priorities, especially if you have other Carpenter movies to see, this is an easy film to watch and enjoy, with a couple of great set-pieces and a fun ending.

6/10

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Escape Plan (2013)

You don't watch a movie starring Sylvester Stallone, or Arnold Schwarzenegger, and expect logic and common sense to be the top priorities. I get that, I really do. But Escape Plan, which stars both men in lead roles, is even sillier and full of plot holes than it needs to be. It's so careless that the enjoyment factor is slightly ruined.

Stallone plays Ray Breslin, a man who can escape from pretty much any prison that's been designed. He's so good at it that he's made it his job. He gets incarcerated, under a false identity. He gets out. The prison gets a report that details the weaknesses in their security. When he's offered a bumper fee, Ray allows himself to be grabbed and thrown into another prison. This time, however, things are even tougher than usual. His colleagues have no idea where he is, the prison warden (Jim Caviezel) knows of his reputation and wants to make sure that he doesn't leave, and the prison is full of transparent cells, making for a much tougher challenge. The only plus point comes in the unlikely form of a prisoner named Rottmayer (Schwarzenegger).

Directed by Mikael Hafstrom, and written by Miles Chapman and Jason Keller, this is a film that really could have had anyone behind the camera. There doesn't seem to be any individual style stamped on the thing. That's fine, however, because everything is geared towards getting Sly and Arnie working together onscreen, and that is often enough to carry the whole thing along. Yes, the two worked together on The Expendables movies, but this time around they get to do more than reel off one-liners and cash in on nostalgia.

Both of the leading men are great. They've still got it when it comes to delivering the action. I've never been a fan of Jim Caviezel - I can't think of a leading man with less charisma in the past couple of decades (well, maybe Edward Burns, but that's it) - and, while he does slightly better than usual here, this is another performance that hasn't converted me. It's a part that's crying out for Eric Roberts, of course, and Caviezel sure as hell ain't no Roberts. Faran Tahir does just fine with his part, another prisoner who ends up being important to the grand plan, and Sam Neill is great as the prison doctor, a man who tries to do his job without thinking of the bigger picture. Vincent D'onofrio, Amy Ryan and Curtis "50 Cent" Jackson also do well as Sly's colleagues.

Escape Plan is entertaining. It doesn't require too much concentration, the cast have fun and you will root for Sly to win the day. It's a shame, then, that everything wasn't just tightened up ever so slightly. The details revealed to viewers that are supposed to make you think "aaahhhhhhhhh, very smart" just end up highlighting the fact that it all hinges on good fortune and other characters being blind, stupid, or both. The fact that there isn't even one great set-piece is another disappointment.

You'll be able to watch and enjoy this movie, but I don't think it's one that will end up being revisited all that much. Disposable fun, boosted by the charismatic leads.

6/10

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