Sharknado 2: The Second One (2014)

The other plus to me reviewing, or trying to review, every movie I see. I can figure out past errors. Somehow, I gave Ian Ziering a different first name in my review of Sharknado. Sorry for that mistake, it's now been fixed. And now . . . . . . let's get to The Second One.

You may not believe, or want to hear, this. Sharknado 2: The Second One is a better movie than its predecessor. In fact, the first third of the movie has some inspired moments that had me thinking this could be a film to use as a lesson, showing others how schlocky, z-grade material can transgress those roots to become something so entertaining it's no longer "so bad it's good". It just ends up being genuinely good.

Unfortunately, that opening third of the movie is followed by a middle act that starts to test your patience, and everything is capped off by a finale that just fails to find the sweet spot so tantalisingly offered up to us in the first 15-20 minutes (a real delight, mainly thanks to a great riff on "Nightmare At 20,000 Feet").

Ian Ziering and Tara Reid return to face shark-infested weather, and they're joined this time by Vivica A. Fox, Mark McGrath, Judd Hirsch, Kari Wuhrer, and a whole host of famous faces turning up for cameos (Tiffany Shepis, Kelly Osbourne, Kurt Angle, Billy Ray Cyrus, Andy Dick, Richard Kind, and many others). The acting isn't necessarily better than it was in the first movie, but the absurd humour of the premise has been heightened and played upon in such a way as to make it seem that way.

Director Anthony C. Ferrante returns to help the ridiculousness, and he does it well, taking the script, by Thunder Levin, and running with it at every opportunity. There are things that don't work, but there are a surprising number of things that do. Some one-liners made me smirk, either because they were good or they were so bad that I still found them amusing (like a gag from a Christmas cracker). And all of those cameos add a fun "I Spy" layer to the proceedings.

The CGI is still pretty awful, but such is the way of many movies from The Asylum, and logic and continuity are nowhere to be seen, of course, but all of those things are forgivable when everything else is so much fun. It's just a shame that the fun is all drained away by the last 20 minutes, which take your goodwill and grind it down to almost nothing, leaving a sour taste in your mouth as the end credits run.

If you liked the first movie then you'll find enough here to provide some amusement. If you hated the first movie then don't come anywhere near this one. Personally, I'm already anticipating the third one (if/when it happens).

5/10

http://www.amazon.com/Sharknado-2-Second-One-Blu-ray/dp/B00LOCLDSG/ref=sr_1_1_bnp_1_blu?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1408397644&sr=1-1&keywords=sharknado+2

Leprechaun's Revenge (2012)

If you haven't seen any of Drew Daywalt's short horror movies, under the FEWDIO banner, then head to YouTube now and check them out. Bedfellows remains my favourite (Creep and Mockingbird are also brilliant), but so many of them are perfect little gems that you really can just go through them all. Drew is clearly a very talented man. And when he's not making horror movies he's creating astoundingly successful children's books. Well, one so far. The Day The Crayons Quit. Which makes viewing Leprechaun's Revenge a frustrating experience. It's not all that bad for a TV movie, but fans of Mr. Daywalt know that he's capable of something much better.

The story is quite simple, and gets moving quite quickly. Karen (Courtney Halverson) is out hunting with her grandfather (William Devane) when she spies something in the woods and also gets her hand marked with a red clover. It turns out that a vicious leprechaun has sprung to life, and Karen has a limited window of time to destroy it before she is doomed. Convincing her father, the local Sheriff (Billy Zane), isn't going to be easy, but she won't be able to do it alone.

There's a bit more to it than that, with a backstory about how the main family involved are descended from people who made their fortune by, well, not being nice to a leprechaun, but that just about sums it up. It's a creature feature, with a leprechaun that's far removed from the other main leprechaun known to cinema fans, but it also has some good jump scares interspersed randomly throughout as the main character succumbs to visions of what she knows is coming after her.

The direction is solid, and the script by Anthony C. Ferrante tries to do a decent job (especially when poking fun at itself), but it's not long until cracks start to appear and the movie crumbles to a state that it can't recover from. The potential for genuine scares soon dissipates, to be replaced by more standard jumps and moments of ridiculousness. Worst of all, the last few minutes feel really rushed and anti-climactic.

Halverson is fine in the main role, and Devane and Zane are both people I always enjoy watching onscreen. Zane deserves bonus points for his straight delivery during the moment in which he relates a personal tragedy that's one of the funniest I have heard in a movie of this kind. Thankfully, the comedic aspect of the material is always intentional, I think. Dave Davis is the young man who wants to help Halverson stay safe, understandably, and Azure Parsons makes a great impression with her few scenes, playing another officer of the law caught up in the madness.

It's a bit of fun, no more and no less. Worth watching if it comes on the TV and you can't be bothered to reach for the remote control, but I hope to see something much better whenever Daywalt is allowed to make a feature film completely on his own terms.

5/10

You can buy it here, under the title "Red Clover" - http://www.amazon.com/Red-Clover/dp/B00E99FYD6/ref=sr_1_1?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1402686976&sr=1-1&keywords=leprechaun%27s+revenge

Hansel & Gretel (2013)

Fairytales have been bringing in some big bucks over the past few years. Or they've been trying to, at least. TV shows and movies based, sometimes very loosely, on the classic stories that entertained many of us as children have been doing pretty well with teens and older viewers. Stuff like Grimm, Once Upon A Time, Snow White & The Huntsman, and Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters. So it was only a matter of time until the Asylum got involved. And here is their contribution.

Be warned, some minor spoilers may follow, for those who like to view a movie without knowing ANY of the details beforehand.

Brent Lydic and Stephanie Greco play the brother and sister, with the both of them in great danger from a witch (Lilith, played by Dee Wallace) who already has a number of potential victims in her basement, ready to make into meals. Will Hansel & Gretel be able to escape?

Directed by Anthony C. Ferrante, this is pretty solid stuff. The reasons I warned of minor spoilers above is because I wasn't sure whether or not to mention that the witch was played by Dee Wallace, but it would be hard to review the movie without mentioning it, especially as she's the most recognisable name in the cast list. But I'll get back to the acting later. Anyway, Ferrante does a decent, if unspectacular, job in the director's chair. Some more spit and polish could have really made this into a little gem, but the final product is passable anyway, not exactly great but not bad either.

The script by Jose Prendes has a few good ideas sprinkled throughout, including the different effects of the magic treats created by the witch. Unfortunately, there are also many moments, especially in the first half, that just reek of cliche, and then there's a second half that suffers a bit of an identity crisis, trying to spin the fairytale plates while it also attempts to make everything feel a bit like a Wrong Turn movie.

Lydic and Greco do okay, and Sara Fletcher and Clark Perry stand out from the small selection of other people trying to avoid being put into the oven. Steve Hanks, Trish Coren and M. Steven Felty are a few of the adults who may be able to help the witch's victims, or may now. And then there's Wallace, who has some fun as Lilith. It's actually not the wild and over the top performance that viewers might expect, but that just makes the occasional outbursts all the more enjoyable.

I'd advise any fans of this kind of movie to go for any of the other recent versions of the tale ahead of this one. Although, having said that, this isn't as bad as it could have been.

5/10

http://www.amazon.com/Hansel-Gretel-Dee-Wallace/dp/B009X484OS/ref=sr_1_11?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1399926186&sr=1-11&keywords=hansel+and+gretel

Sharknado (2013)

Don't pretend that you haven't heard of this one. The movie that had a poster/DVD cover featuring a tornado full of dangerous sharks, with the tagline: "Enough said!"

Sharknado is exactly what you think it will be. The plot is all about a freak hurricane that picks up lots of sharks and throws them into the streets of Los Angeles. While it's raining sharks (hallelujah?), our hero (Ian Ziering, playing a man named . . . . . . Fin) takes a few people along for the ride as he desperately heads out to help his ex-wife (Tara Reid) and protect his teenage-ish kids.

On one hand, there's no point in criticising Sharknado for succeeding at what it aims to be. Director Anthony C. Ferrante and writer Thunder Levin have crafted what may well be the new benchmark for Asylum movies (taking the crown from the mighty Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus). It's so high concept while also scraping the bottom of the barrel that it forms one almighty paradox wrapped in an oxymoron wrapped in a . . . . . . . . . CGI shark.

The acting from almost everyone onscreen is pretty dire. That's not to say that everyone is unforgivably bad. They're bad, but somehow still manage to win viewers over just by turning up and taking part in the madness. Tara Reid may be the most famous face onscreen, but you wouldn't know it from her acting skills. Let's be generous and assume that she lowered her performance levels to be in line with everyone else around her. Ziering isn't bad, but he's not very good either. John Heard is good fun, despite not being onscreen often enough, and Cassie Scerbo, Jaason Simmons, Chuck Hittinger and Aubrey Peeples all try their best to act like people . . . . . . . . . running scared from sharks that are being thrown from violent tornadoes.

The script is bad, with the obvious Jaws reference(s) being particularly groansome, the continuity is non-continuous and the special effects aren't all that special, but this has some fun moments here and there and certainly can't be accused of being dull.

I think I can sum up my reaction to Sharknado by summing up my reaction to one scene, in particular. The main characters try to tell people about the danger that they're in and try to move people away from shark-infested rainwaters. While doing so, one woman is knocking on the exterior of her car and asking someone to help her dog, who is locked in the car. This is obviously supposed to be a "save the dog, at least save the dog" moment a la Independence Day. But . . . . . but . . . . . but . . . . . the dog is INSIDE the car. The dog is LOCKED IN the car. This means that either a) the woman now wanting help to get her dog out somehow locked it in there in the first place and is, therefore, a bit of an idiot or b) the dog knew that shit was going down and decided to lock itself within the relatively safe shell of the car. Either way, that dog seems to be one of the smartest characters. Enough said!

4/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Sharknado-DVD-Anthony-C-Ferrante/dp/B00EAR5PV8/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1376258930&sr=8-2&keywords=sharknado