Sweet Sixteen (1983)

I used to assume that if there was a slasher movie that I had yet to see then it must be one of the lesser entries in this overcrowded subgenre. Now I know that is not the case. It just so happens that a) I have still to see half of the films that I really should, as a big horror fan, and b) there are SO many "lower-tier" slasher movies that are still hugely entertaining. Which brings me to Sweet Sixteen, a film I decided to take a gamble on, having not heard of it before, and one I am now glad to have seen.

The basic plot revolves around a young girl named Melissa (Aleisa Shirley, making her film debut). Melissa is new in town and she's a couple of weeks away from her sixteenth birthday. She also gets the attention of one or two boys. So it's not too long until young boys start turning up dead. The murders perplex Sheriff Dan Burke (Bo Hopkins) and his teenage children (Dana Kimmell and Steve Antin), and they also give some of the locals an extra reason to be suspicious of, and abusive towards, some Native Americans who live nearby.

Although very tame by the standards of many other slasher movies from this time, Sweet Sixteen still manages to tick a lot of boxes for fans of the subgenre. It has the whodunnit element, it has a historic trauma that feeds into the motivation of the killer, and it spends one or two moments lingering for an uncomrfotably long time on the physical form of Melissa (Shirley may have been about 19 or so when this was made, but let's not forget that the character she is playing is supposed to be just about to turn 16).

It also has a decent cast of core characters, played well enough by the performers. Hopkins is a likable authority figure, Kimmell and Antin manage to avoid being too annoying as the kids who don't listen to their father when they really should, Don Stroud is an entertaining asshole, Don Shanks does just fine as Jason Longshadow (a Native American who becomes a main suspect), and Patrick Macnee and Susan Strasberg are fun as the parents of Melissa. Shirley isn't that great in her main role, but she's not terrible either.

The script by Erwin Goldman does well when it comes to the characters and their interactions, although it might disappoint people wanting a higher bodycount. Director Jim Sotos does a perfectly acceptable job, keeping everything restrained until we get to the inevitably busy grand finale (like so many other slasher movies, a reveal that wouldn't feel too out of place in any Scooby Doo cartoon).

I doubt this will be on any list of favourite or best slasher movies, and I am not sure why I ended up enjoying it as much as I did. But I did really enjoy it. And I'll recommend it to other horror movie fans. Even if they come back to me and tell me they were disappointed.

7/10

You can buy the blu here.

Hot Moves (1984)

A group of horny teens vow to lose their virginity before beginning their senior year of high school. Yes, Hot Moves is yet another 80s forerunner to American Pie and it’s also one of the better outings in the 80s teen sex comedy subgenre.

The plot doesn’t get complicated in any way, and leaves room for moments that are really nothing more than music videos showcasing the sun-kissed activity of Venice Beach, but that means that viewers can sit back and enjoy a series of extended skits all based around people just trying to have sex.

Michael Zorek gets the most screentime, playing Barry, but the central character is really Michael (Adam Silbar), who appears to want his girlfriend (Julie Ann, played by Jill Schoelen) for sex that has yet to happen. Michael is jealous of a girl (Heidi, played by Deborah Richter) that he sees accompanying his brother along the beach and this sets his libido into overdrive. Not that it takes all that much.

Hot Moves has, obviously, dated quite a bit since it was released almost 30 years ago but it holds up better than many others from the time thanks to a relatively likeable group of lads anchoring the shenanigans and a number of set-ups for laughs that are actually pretty funny. Things take a little while to get going but once Barry thinks he’s in luck with a woman who likens him to a big teddy bear it’s pretty solid for laughs from then on.

The movie also receives a big boost thanks to the lovely ladies onscreen. Jill Schoelen is cute enough, Deborah Richter is gorgeous and there’s also some onscreen time for the beautiful Monique Gabrielle.

Peter Foldy and Larry Anderson are the men responsible for the script. It’s no classic but spaces out enough info and details to lay the groundwork for the bigger laughs and the more satisfying moments. Director Jim Sotos may have only helmed about half a dozen movies in his career but he doesn’t do too badly here, providing enough sunshine, smirks and nudity to keep the core demographic pleased until the end credits roll. Yep, Hot Moves holds up surprisingly well. 

7/10. 

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