For It Is Man's Number: slasher

Showing posts with label slasher. Show all posts

Thursday, 23 October 2025

Sick (2022)

If you think back to the peak days of the global pandemic of 2020 then it makes sense that it would inspire a slasher. Everyone was paranoid, many were isolated from others, and the majority of people were wearing masks anyway. This is the fertile ground explored by writers Kevin Williamson and Katelynn Crabb in Sick.

After an obligatory opening sequence of tension and death, Sick starts properly when we meet two friends, Parker (Gideo Adlon) and Miri (Bethlehem Million, credited as Beth Million), who are about to quarantine together at a remote house by a lake. They are soon joined by DJ (Dylan Sprayberry). And . . . someone else.

The one thing I knew about Sick was that Kevin Williamson was involved. It's always going to get noticed when such a big name in the slasher sub-genre has a hand in another slasher movie. His involvement had me keen to see this, but I also knew to control my expectations. This was, after all, a slasher movie set during a period of time that many of us would probably prefer to forget. Thankfully, Williamson and Crabb set things up nicely, and gain some goodwill by having the first line of dialogue be someone asking about toilet paper in a store, and there's a tone throughout that respects what we all went through in 2020 while also highlighting how crazy it all was. Many people were driven a bit crazy by the whole situation, and I count myself among them.

Having been familiar with the work of director John Hyams in the action genre, it was a pleasant surprise to see his name pop up here. That's on me, considering his previous forays into thriller and horror territory (with at least one feature and some TV work to his credit, including the fun Z Nation and the fantastic Chucky show). Hyams works well enough with the material, although he doesn't get to show off any of his usual style and ability here. Backgrounds are used well, particularly during the many times that characters in the foreground are oblivious to movement behind them, but the main premise makes it a struggle for Hyams to keep things tense and lively enough throughout the 83-minute runtime.

Adlon and Million are decent in their roles, although it would have been nice to have some more established named placed in the middle of the proceedings, and Sprayberry makes the best of what he's given. Marc Menchaca and Jane Adams are both good value, and Joel Courtney gets to play someone who casts as large a shadow over everything as any masked murderer.

Despite dipping slightly in the middle, Sick works well thanks to a strong start and a great third act. The motivation for the murders is actually quite brilliant, and I was smiling at how obvious and well-handled it was as everything started to fall into place. There's nothing new here, but it feels fresh because of the specific time period. Although I would warn people that, obviously, this isn't necessarily something you'll enjoy if you're still recovering from the collective global trauma that saw so much pain, insanity, and death in such a relatively short period of time.

7/10

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Wednesday, 17 September 2025

Prime Time: The Mouse Trap (2024)

I've been around a bit. Which means I'm old, but also means that I have learned many lessons. Most of those lessons are visible in my online writing. I used to try and tag movie titles all over social media, whether the review was good or bad. Then I discovered that was a bad thing, particularly when the review is bad and the film-makers see it appearing in places they may not want to see it. I used to be a bit more free and easy with my insults, although I am pretty sure that I still did my best to avoid getting personal. And I used to live in a world in which many of the horror movies looking to make a quick payday seemed just a bit less cynical.

The Mouse Trap is another of those recent movies that is cashing in on an expired copyright (this particular one belonging to "Steamboat Willie"). It's written by Simon Phillips, an actor and writer involved in some very poor genre movies throughout the past two decades. It's directed by Jamie Bailey. The last thing I saw from this duo was Deinfluencer, a film so bad that it makes The Mouse Trap seem wonderful in comparison. And The Mouse Trap is decidedly not wonderful.

There's a wraparound that shows two detectives interviewing a young woman (Rebecca, played by Mackenzie Mills) who has just survived a massacre at an amusement arcade. The killer was wearing a very familiar mask, and may have the power of teleportation. This makes it much easier for him to carve his way through everyone who has turned up after hours to celebrate the birthday of Alex (Sophie McIntosh). Simple, eh. So you should expect a cheap film that keeps a focus on gratuitous violence, and maybe also some gratuitous nudity. That's not what you get though.

There's an amusing opening scroll that allows the film-makers to acknowledge their cheek at (mis)using something simply based on the availability of it, but that's the only thing here that is worth your time. I don't want to be overly harsh on the cast members, despite nobody being all that good, so I'll just say that nobody manages to deliver a character with any depth, or worth caring about in the slightest. A large part of that is to do with the writing, of course, but Mills, McIntosh, Madeline Kelman, Ben Harris, Callum Sywyk, Mireille Gagné, James Laurin, and Kayleigh Styles are only being mentioned here because I can check the cast list online. I couldn't pick any of them out of a lineup if my life depended on it, and I only just finished watching the film.

I blame both Bailey and Phillips equally for this mess. At best, this could have been a silly bit of murder and mayhem. If there's no need for logic then there's no need to limit the creativity. Sadly, this is a tame and, worst of all, boring slasher movie that barely delivers enough bloodshed, let alone anything else that could have made it more entertaining. The 80-minute runtime feels much longer than that, and I guarantee that there are dozens of other cheap slasher movies that do a much better job without making use of some misappropriated iconography.

Yes, I'll watch every other movie like this. I'm going to check out Screamboat, I'll eventually check out that second Winnie The Pooh horror, Popeye's Revenge, Peter Pan's Neverland Nightmare, and Bambi: The Reckoning too. I doubt I'll enjoy many (if any) of them. But I can now hope that they're at least more fun than this dull dreck.

2/10

Saturday, 30 August 2025

Shudder Saturday: Tourist Trap (1979)

Another week goes by, another movie watched by myself that I could have sworn I'd already watched years ago. Tourist Trap is quite a well-known horror movie, at least among horror movie fans who didn't just start their journey through the genre in the '90s or at the start of this century, and I always confused it with some other films I'd already seen (probably something like Just Before Dawn). Anyway, now I've finally seen it, and I'm glad.

The first feature from director David Schmoeller, who also co-wrote the thing with J. Larry Carroll, this is an enjoyably simple premise that uses the framework to deliver some impressive imagery and a feeling of spiralling madness. It may seem a bit crude and cheap to modern viewers, but there are still a handful of moments here that really impress.

Chuck Connors plays a man who encounters some holidaying youngsters in a place that is fairly isolated. There are large woods to wander around in, a lake to swim in for a whole, and the titular tourist trap, a roadside museum featuring a number of disturbing mannequins. It's not long until these young people start to get anxious about their predicament, and they start being picked off, one by one, even before you can say "the car engine won't start, dammit."

Aside from Connors, there's nobody truly memorable in the cast here. You have people like Jocelyn Jones, Jon Van Ness, Robin Sherwood, Tanya Roberts, and one or two others, enough to at least present a generous selection of potential victims. I wouldn't single anyone out as bad, nor would I single anyone out as a real highlight. Connors is fun as the standard old man who advises the younger people against too many shenanigans, but there's more of an impression made by one or two of the aforementioned mannequins.

Considering the relatively familiar and uninspired plotting, Tourist Trap excels thanks to some fantastic visuals throughout, helped by the cinematography of Nicholas Josef von Sternberg, as well as a score from Pino Donaggio accompanying the unfolding insanity. Lots of other people work behind the scenes to make this the best it can be, including Ted Nicolau editing and working in the sound department a few years before starting his own directorial career, and the end result is something that feels as surprisingly influential as it was itself influenced by a number of key horror movie classics.

It could have done with a few more suspects/red herrings, and maybe a few more scenes that showcased some onscreen bloodshed, but this remains a great little horror movie for those who will appreciate the atmosphere, creepy visuals, and general sense of characters being pushed further and further into a bottleneck of absolute insanity.

8/10

Wednesday, 18 June 2025

Prime Time: Cutting Class (1989)

A slasher movie so apparently unmemorable that I completely forgot I had already seen it until checking my IMDb and Letterboxd resources, Cutting Class is a mildly amusing diversion for those after unsophisticated fun. Maybe the lapse in memory was just down to my film-addled brain. Or maybe I don't consider a film fully watched until I've written more than a paragraph about it.

My original thoughts ran as follows: "Jill Schoelen, Donovan Leitch, and Brad Pitt are the main young stars in this fun slasher, and Roddy McDowall is as watchable as ever in one of the main adult roles. It doesn't go far enough with the dark comedy, and there isn't quite enough decent bloodshed, but it remains enjoyable enough."

That may be brief, but it remains a perfectly fine encapsulation of my opinion on this film. Someone is starting to murder a number of teachers and pupils at a high school. The main suspect seems to be Brian (Donovan Leitch Jr.), who everyone knows spent some time being treated for a slight case of potential insanity. Dwight (Brad Pitt) might also have that killer instinct though. This makes things a bit awkward for Paula (Jill Schoelen), a young woman caught in between the two of them.

The one and only feature directed by Rospo Pallenberg (who did some great writing for director John Boorman, but also ended up assisting on the infamous stinker that is Exorcist II: The Heretic, this is also the film debut for writer Steve Slavkin. It's obvious what the thinking behind this was. Everyone wanted in on some of that slasher movie money, even as the appetite for the sub-genre was waning considerably after the peak of a few "golden years".

I would say that Pallenberg got lucky with his casting of a pre-stardom Pitt, but the whole cast actually does a decent job. Pitt is good fun in his role, a typical high school hunk with enough potential anger issues to make him a suspect when the murders start, and Schoelen is an appealing female lead. Leitch Jr. has to overact wildly, but that's par for the course in every slasher movie that presents someone who is either obviously a killer, or so obviously a killer that they couldn't possibly be a killer (if you know what I mean). Brenda James is another attendee of the school, and good friend of Paula, Roddy McDowall is the lecherous Mr. Dante, and Martin Mull is Paula's father, seen at the start of the film bidding farewell to his daughter as he goes on a hunting trip that will lead to one misfortunate after another, to put it mildly.

There's no visual artistry here, nor are there any set-pieces to help it stand out from the very crowded field it is in (and as the third act played out I also realised that I used to always confuse this with Graduation Day), but horror fans used to going into such things with suitably low expectations should find themselves consistently entertained from start to finish. Which is more than some lower-tier slasher movies manage.

6/10

Sunday, 1 June 2025

Netflix And Chill: Fear Street: Prom Queen (2025)

Time is a flat circle. I know that could be applied to many concepts that we face as we journey through life, but I am using it here to explain the fun of enjoying the cyclical nature of horror movie sub-genres, particularly the slasher movie. Everyone knows how things have gone in the slasher movie landscape. They were, at one point, THE main horror staple for a good few years. Then they faded out. They were uncool. Then a healthy dose of self-awareness and loving cannibalism helped them to become popular again, as well as sometimes being cool. And now? Well . . . now we have a mix of slasher movies that try to keep things fresh alongside slasher movies, like this one, that are happy to unironically present fans with something that wouldn't have seemed out of place back in the early 1980s (aka the boom period for slasher movies).

India Fowler plays Lori Granger, a young woman who has spent her school years having a pretty hard time of things. She's a target for the likes of Tiffany Falconer (Fina Strazza) and her crew of acolytes, often bullied because of the fact that everyone suspects her mother murdered her father. Thankfully, she has a very good friend in Megan Rogers (Suzanna Son). And she has the courage to nominate herself as a prom queen candidate, although there's a masked killer who decides to seriously affect the outcome by killing off a number of the candidates.

Another film making use of source material by R. L. Stine, this is co-written by Donald McLeary and director Matt Palmer, who made his feature debut with the superbly tense Calibre. I have known of Palmer for many years, and always had confident in his ability to deliver great moments for horror fans, but it's good to see him able to step from his more complex and nuanced debut work to this bright, nostalgia-infused, outrageous slice of gory fun.

The cast all do well in their main roles, with Fowler and Rogers particularly easy to root for as the kills start occurring, Strazza an entertainingly loathsome "mean girl", and Ella Rubin, Rebecca Ablack, Ilan O'Driscoll, David Iacono, and Ariana Greenblatt all doing enough to make their characters identifiable enough, yet also just as prone to be killed off as anyone else unwittingly dancing their way to a Prom Night massacre. The older cast members also have some fun, and you get good turns from Lili Taylor, Chris Klein, Katherine Waterston, and Darrin Baker, who are all given enough time and space to mark themselves out as suspects while the bodycount grows.

The main star here is the production design though. This film isn't just set in Shadyside High in the 1980s. It's set in the school that you picture when you think of every classic school-set moment from the decade, whether that's due to other films being set firmly in that time and place (The Breakfast Club, A Nightmare On Elm Street) or allowing viewers to put on nostalgia-goggles to see something akin to that time and place as other characters seem to literally or mentally move back into the past (e.g. Grosse Point Blank, Hot Tub Time Machine, The Guest, etc). The soundtrack also helps, tickling your ears with hits from Billy Idol, Rick Astley, Roxette, Bananarama, Tiffany, Laura Branigan, Duran Duran, and many more, as well as a couple of superb tunes from Power Glove, and the whole package feels as if it could have been made and released forty years ago. That will be a major plus point for many, but some will view it as a reason to avoid the film forever. As I'm sure you can tell, I am firmly in the former camp.

I don't think there's anything more I can say to those who are still on the fence. Things may feel a bit tame in the first act, but you can rest assured that things get bloodier and nastier on the way to the fun-filled, if slightly predictable, conclusion. Palmer and co. really know what they're doing, and slasher fans should trust them to take them on a fun ride back into 1980s glitter and gore.

7/10

Saturday, 29 March 2025

Shudder Saturday: Bloody Axe Wound (2024)

I was going to be a bit kinder to Bloody Axe Wound, a horror comedy from writer-director Matthew John Lawrence, who also gave us Uncle Peckerhead, but a friend of mine then mentioned a film that it quite closely resembles and now I am less inclined to be as kind as I was going to be. I'm not going to be unkind though. And I'm not going to mention the other film here, for fear of spoiling the experience of the film for others.

Sari Arambulo plays Abbie Bladecut, a young woman who appreciates the fact that her father, Roger Bladecut (Billy Burke), is a prolific serial killer. He always ensures that his list of victims includes every main character type you find in most slasher movies, and that pays off when the more acceptable side of the family business, a video store, receives tapes of films showcasing real murders packaged in a fictional context. Abbie believes it is her time to take over from her father, but he isn't so keen to pick her as his immediate successor. She knows that she can kill anyone though. Well . . . anyone except Sam Crane (Molly Brown), a young woman Abbie soon becomes attracted to.

While fun for most of the runtime, and really enjoyable when we get to see Abbie try to balance her chosen life with a chosen partner who was destined to be a victim, Bloody Axe Wound doesn't really have the focus to work as well as it could. There are some good ideas in the mix, some more familiar than others, but they end up raising questions that Lawrence then never bothers to answer. Which is his prerogative, but doesn't really add anything to the plot, considering we don't see, for example, who makes and delivers the videotapes, how they are being received by film fans in the area, and why the power of Bladecut allows for some impressively unnatural endurance and capability.

I thought there might be some commentary here, something about the clash between generations, but there's nothing. The "meet-cute" element is nicely done, and Arambulo and Brown have great chemistry, but that's about it. Some decent gags aside, the comedy isn't great. Neither are the kills, which would at least help to make up for other weaknesses.

Burke, quite unrecognisable under a heavy amount of make up, is pretty good casting for the role of Roger Bladecut. He manages to exude weariness and disdain in equal measure, accepting his role as an essential one and his victims as simply people made useful once they have met their demise at his hands. Arambulo is fantastic, a great presence, and the film only works as well as it does thanks to the pairing of her and Brown, who is equally good. Eddie Leavy, Matt Hopkins, Margot Anderson-Song, Sage Spielman, and David Littleton help to round out the cast, although it's only Anderson-Song who manages to make enough of an impression to stand out from the crowd, and Jeffrey Dean Morgan is an extra bit of fun, portraying the killer, Butch Slater, featured in many of the videos that make use of the real-life kills.

I enjoyed Bloody Axe Wound (and, sorry, am I the only one thinking that the title is deliberately referring to a phrase that you can find on Urban Dictionary?), but it never became as good as I hoped it could be. It's just okay, and okay feels much worse than it used to be, due to the never-ending selection of viewing choices being offered up to us week in and week out nowadays.

5/10

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Tuesday, 25 February 2025

Heart Eyes (2025)

Christopher Landon has made a name for himself in the past few years by figuring out fun ways to blend slasher movie tropes with other sub-genres (e.g. timeloop movies, bodyswap films). He has written with Michael Kennedy before, and this time around both are joined by Phillip Murphy to deliver a film that places some bloody kill scenes in the middle of what is essentially a standard rom-com. Josh Ruben is in the director's chair, which means it's up to him to ensure that the dialogue and set-pieces are couched in something that comes close enough to that rom-com style, but can he manage to do that?

A killer is on the loose, the Heart Eyes Killer, and they're targeting couples. This has been happening for a couple of years now, every Valentine's Day, which makes it a big problem for those in a relationship. Ally McCabe (Olivia Holt) isn't in a relationship though, so she should be safe from the killer. Her biggest worry concerns trying to keep her job. In need of major guidance, and a way to overhaul her latest ad campaign that disastrously uses romantic tragedy at the heart of it, Ally ends up forced to work with Jay Simmons (Mason Gooding), a bit of a whizz drafted in to save the day. Ally and Jay need to spend some time together to brainstorm and plan, which leads to the Heart Eyes Killer viewing them as a couple, which leads to them being pursued, even as they try to explain to those around them that they really aren't a couple.

Heart Eyes works fairly well as a slasher. The pacing is decent for most of the runtime, aside from a third act that just has one or two scenes more than necessary, the kills are entertaining and bloody, and Holt and Gooding are very appealing leads. The most pleasant surprise, however, is just how well some of the rom-com moments work. There's a great meet-cute, a fun sense of external factors ensuring that our leads are destined to pair up, and stay paired up, some very fun cute klutziness that adds some non-lethal injuries to the onscreen catalogue of pain, and even the scenes of attempted murder often show a romance blossoming under unusually difficult circumstances. There are times when it tries to be too cute though, particularly when name-checking other movies and painfully winking at viewers, but nothing is bad enough to unbalance the whole thing.

Aside from Holt and Gooding, who are absolutely as enjoyable and likeable as they need to be in their roles, the cast also includes Devon Sawa and Jordana Brewster as a pair of cops named . . . Hobbs and Shaw, Gigi Zumbado as the standard protective bestie, and Michaela Watkins as a demanding boss, as well as a number of people who make enough of an impression in their first few moments to make them plausible suspects as the killing spree starts to feel a bit more personal.

Despite the lighter touch, this is still a film aimed mainly at slasher movie fans. As long as you can enjoy the strange clash of sub-genres then you will be rewarded with some laughs, some entertaining bloodshed, and a killer working with some nicely-personalised deadly accessories.

7/10

Thursday, 28 November 2024

Thanksgiving (2023)

Whether directly or indirectly, the Grindhouse movie is arguably one of the more influential "failures" of the past couple of decades. So many other films have taken a cue from it, and some of the fun fake trailers have now been made into full features. We've had TWO Machete movies by now, one Hobo With A Shotgun, and now Thanksgiving, a film that fans were wanting to see made as soon as they started laughing at the entertaining ridiculousness of Eli Roth's trailer.

Things start off with some Black Friday carnage, and I do mean carnage. As openers go, Thanksgiving has a corker. It's gory, it presents a varied group of people who could all then have a motivation to kill, and it's memorable. If the rest of the film was then a much more subdued piece, saving major kills for the final act, then it would still be worth your time. It's certainly not subdued though, and the kills are well-spaced throughout, as well as being nicely constructed (from the playful camerawork to the gore gags). The killer is someone wearing a John Carver mask, and, as the tagline says, there will be no leftovers.

Written by Jeff Rendell, who worked on developing the original concept with Roth and making the most of the premise (ensuring enough space for all of the trimmings, shall we say), Thanksgiving is an absolute blast from start to finish. The younger cast members, including Nell Verlaque, Addison Rae, Jalen Thomas Brooks, Milo Manheim, Thomas Sanelli, Gabriel Davenport, and Jenna Warren, all do a decent job of trying to unmask a killer before he or she takes them all out of the picture, and the likes of Patrick Dempsey, Gina Gershon, Tim Dillon, Rick Hoffman, and Karen Cliche do well as the adults who may find themselves in just as much danger as the youngsters. Joe Delfin is right in the middle of those two main groups, which gives me a chance to single him out here as an extra treat in a film full of them.

Roth is a divisive figure, although you could say that about almost any horror movie director to have emerged in the 21st century. I certainly see why some would take such a dislike to him though, with his worryingly easy way of channeling the voice of at least one typical douchebro into most of his movies. He certainly knows what slasher movie fans want to see though, and delivers it in spades. Maintaining just the right tone throughout, no easy feat when it comes to a couple of the more memorable set-pieces, Roth and Rendell present a fine selection of red herrings, some imaginative kills, and the expected reveal and explanation during the grand finale. The humour works well, especially when it's underlining the holiday theme of the murders, and the survivors do just enough to keep you rooting for them at the end, even if they aren't exactly the most immediately likeable individuals.

I tend to like Roth movies, although I have often had to rewatch them to fully make my mind up. He may be abrasive, he may be over-exposed, and he may sometimes let his mouth write cheques that his film-making body can't cash, but he certainly knows the specific horror movies that he likes to reference and be influenced by. Thanksgiving is impressive because it not only manages to deliver the slasher movie goodies, but it does so without making use of the self-aware and meta layering that almost every other big American slasher movie has contained since Wes Craven helped that style become hugely popular.

That's not cranberry sauce being sprayed around the place, and this is definitely no turkey.

8/10

Tuesday, 29 October 2024

HauntedWeen (1991)

There's nothing like a good slasher movie, and many slasher movies you can find in your exploration of horror cinema can best be described as nothing like a good slasher movie. HauntedWeen isn't good, not in the standard ways, but it's a lot of fun, and certainly does better than a lot of slasher movies that are less interesting, and less enjoyable.

Things start in the classic way, a prank gone wrong. A young boy accidentally kills a young girl, but he's then protected by his mother for years, instead of being treated by any proper professionals. Sadly, mother passes away, leaving that young boy as a confused man, living in what is assumed by everyone else to be an abandoned house. Which is where our cast of disposable fraternity students comes in, looking to make money by turning the abandoned house into a haunted house experience. It's certainly going to be full of scares, but they may be much more realistic than intended.

The only film written and directed by Doug Robertson, this is the kind of oddity that many will hate, but some (like myself) will be slightly charmed by. The acting and effects are both quite crude, the dialogue isn't polished, and there are many scenes that feel like filler on the way to a satisfying end sequence, but it's a group of people trying to do their best with very limited resources. Although released in 1991, this feels like it's from some years earlier (I don't know the schedule, sometimes these independent productions can take years to film and find distribution, depending on the availability of everyone).

Ethan Adler does a decent job as the killer, Eddie, and the setting allows him to have one or two moments that feel memorable for all the right reasons, and Brien Blakely, Blake Pickett, Brad Hanks, Leslee Lacey, et al. do fairly well as they remain part of a large group of potential victims to be hacked and slashed once our killer starts to get his groove on. Nobody stands out, but that just makes it easier to sit and wait to see who won't make it to the end credits.

There's plenty to pick apart here, especially on a technical level, but this won me over. Using the familiar slasher movie template, it has a great idea at the heart of it, even if Robertson cannot do quite enough with his film-making to match the potential of the premise, and there are one or two well-executed scares on the way to the third act. I'm not going to consider it any kind of forgotten classic though, I'm not that blinded by my affection for it. I would tentatively recommend it to fans of the sub-genre though, especially those who have already sat through so many other films in this vein, and are already used to the weaknesses often outweighing the strengths.

6/10

Sunday, 27 October 2024

Netflix And Chill: The Conference (2023)

I don't know why I didn't get around to watching The Conference sooner, considering the good word I heard about it from other horror movie fans, but I finally made time for it now. Do I consider it time well spent though? that's the question. I do, although I think it could have been a bit sharper.

What you should know about The Conference is that it is a darkly comedic slasher movie set at a remote hotel where a group of colleagues are to engage in a variety of team-building activities. That premise is ripe with potential for fun, pain, and murders, as anyone who has seen the excellent Severance will already know. There's also something fishy about the latest big deal that this team are due to celebrate, which leads to people throwing around a few accusations and choice curse words. Even worse, someone starts a killing spree. But who is the killer, and what is their motive?

Based on the 2021 novel, Konferensen (also the standard title of the movie in the original Swedish language), by Mats Strandberg, The Conference is co-written by Thomas Moldestad and director Patrik Eklund. Moldestad has worked well in this sub-genre before, having helped to shape the enjoyable Cold Prey trilogy, but I am completely unfamiliar with Eklund's filmography, although a quick browse shows that most of his projects have been mostly short-form work. Much like the aforementioned Cold Prey, this is happy to stay well within familiar boundaries, and it presents some enjoyable tension and decent kill scenes in a way that reminds you of how easy it should be to deliver such relatively simple pleasures to horror movie fans who don't need every slasher movie to comment on, and play with, every rule and trope that has been part and parcel of the sub-genre for decades.

Despite not giving them all quite enough time and space to make their impact, Eklund also helps his cast do enough to both work as one imperilled group and also individuals who may end up being a killer or a victim. Katia Winter and Adam Lundgren work very well as Lina and Jonas, respectively, the two most at loggerheads, and Maria Sid is wonderful as the team leader, Ingela. Eva Melander, Bahar Pars, Amed Bozan, Christoffer Nordenrot, Claes Hartelius, Cecilia Nilsson, and Jimmy Lindström all deserve a mention though, as do Lola Zackow and Marie Agerhäll, everyone convincingly engaging in their usual work duties until the bloodshed begins and the fear starts to flow through the group like a fast-developing fire.

There are weaknesses here though, and I should probably make note of them here before people start assuming that this is some unmissable and perfect creation. The attempts to give the killer some memorable iconography don't quite work, the red herrings thrown around aren't ever convincing, and the second half moves between some decent kills and a fairly banal explanation for the murderous rampage. There are also very few elements that truly stand out, one or two kills aside. The script could have been sharper, the direction likewise, and those two important aspects not being as strong as possible create a ripple effect that neuters what should have been a good bit of gory fun.

6/10

Wednesday, 14 August 2024

Prime Time: Bikini Bloodbath Car Wash (2008)

Although the second film in a series of slasher comedies, I somehow felt that I would be okay just diving straight into Bikini Bloodbath Car Wash without having any previous knowledge of the ongoing Bikini Bloodbath Cinematic Universe (or BBCU, if you like). I was quite right, although there are perhaps some more little nods and gags here that may prompt a smile or small chuckle from viewers of the previous film.

It would be downright rude of me to spend too much time trying to bulk out a plot description of this. There are some young women who sometimes wear bikinis, of course. There's a sequence that has them washing cars. Debbie Rochon has fun in an amusing supporting role. Oh, and there's a killer looking to spoil the fun for everyone.

Written and directed by Jonathan Gorman and Thomas Edward Seymour, this cheap and clumsy horror comedy won't appeal to those who want slick production values and star names in their entertainment, but it somehow manages to be good fun for those who have seen their fair share of independent movies over the years. The comedy throughout may not be the most clever, or even the funniest, but the film-makers get points for trying to load up every scene with enough gags to ensure that one or two hit the mark. And one or two do hit the mark. The gore gags, on the other hand, are more of a miss, but there are a couple of attempts to deliver a decent amount of blood and guts.

The technical side of things may be a bit "rough 'n' ready", to put it kindly, and I think a lot of the crew here have more enthusiasm and multi-tasking ability than natural talent and finesse, but I've seen movies that have been a lot worse than this when it comes to the audio and viaul quality. That may be damning the film with faint praise, and I certainly wouldn't pick out any real highlights, but it was a pleasant surprise to see that everyone involved wanted to keep things visible while allowing you to actually hear the dialogue. Neither of those things are a given when it comes to independent movies, especially those with even one toe dipping in the waters of the horror genre.

You get the usual weaker elements in the cast, but you also get Rochon being as wonderful as she so often can be. Rachael Robbins is very good too, playing the lovely Jenny, and I take my hat off to Natalie Williams, playing Sharon, for her willingness to go along with the running joke of everyone sneeringly mocking her for being fat (not my word, that's the description used often in the script), despite the fact that she clearly isn't.

The women act a bit silly, and are quick to disrobe, while the guys are oversexed jerks, and everyone is just waiting around until the killer gets to them. That's the kind of film that this is. It could have better kills, and it could have had even more jokes shoehorned in, but I was pleasantly surprised by how fitfully amused I was while watching it. Will I watch it again? I doubt it, but I'll probably watch the other instalments in the BBCU. My rather generous rating reflects the good intentions, as opposed to the overall execution of the material, but it still makes this better than some of the much bigger titles I have watched this year.

5/10

Tuesday, 16 July 2024

In A Violent Nature (2024)

Remember the joke in Clerks II when a character dismisses The Lord Of The Rings trilogy by boiling it down to various scenes of people walking? That same dismissive criticism could be levelled at In A Violent Nature, the new horror film that has made a name for itself by aligning viewers more closely with the slasher villain at the heart of it.

Written and directed by Chris Nash, who has a number of shorts to his credit already (as well as make up credits in other features), this is the simple tale of a man walking through the woods and picking off some unsuspecting victims. The deadly events are triggered by a locket being moved, which motivates Johnny (Ry Barrett) to kill and kill again, at least until he can regain possession of the locket and go back to a temporary state of peaceful death again.

There's not too much to discuss here, in many ways. The cinematography is fine, the sound mix allows viewers to hear ongoing conversations that help to contextualise things while Johnny continues on his plodding journey (giving you snippets of moments that you'd expect to see from a different angle in any standard slasher movie), and the cast are all very disposable.

I know to credit Barrett as Johnny, and he deserves to be singled out for a physical performance that allows Johnny to feel deserving of being alongside the classic masked killers of the sub-genre (in terms of the presentation of him, if nothing else). Elsewhere, however, I had to be reminded of the other cast members, and cannot say that many of them stand out from the crowd. Andrea Pavlovic, Cameron Love, Reece Presley, Liam Leone, Charlotte Creaghan, Lea Rose Sebastianis, and everyone else involved do what they're asked to do, although that isn't much. They are fodder, and I will be very surprised if anyone watches this film with their eye on any one character they hope to see make it to the end credits.

A slasher movie is often rated based on how well the kills are executed though, no pun intended, and this is where In A Violent Nature wins some big bonus points. There are some great kills in this, and one of them is quite possibly the best I've ever seen. They're brutal and nasty, but shown in a way that showcases the special effects without feeling as lascivious and troublesome as the kind of extended sequences we recently saw in the Terrifier movies, to grab for the first example that springs to mind. If Nash had worked more on the rest of the scenes surrounding the kills, especially an interminable final sequence that ends the film with a whimper instead of any climactic scream, then this could have been a modern classic. Sadly, he doesn't do that, and that ending is hard to forgive.

I enjoyed a lot of this, and was willing it to completely win me over, but it doesn't quite get enough right. If you're presenting a slasher movie with a lot of "behind the scenes" moments that we don't usually see, you need to do it with more wit, inventiveness, and passion. This is an interesting exercise, but it all too often feels like it is most interested in being exactly that.

5/10

Saturday, 22 June 2024

Shudder Saturday: Houseboat Horror (1989)

I've said it before and I'll say it again . . . we live in truly wonderful times for film fans. Many films remain obscure, or almost wiped from existence, but so many films are even more easily available now than they were upon first release. You can get yourself comfortable at home, line up your favourite snacks and beverages, and plan time to watch either a film that has just left, or is sometimes still in, cinema screens, a golden oldie classic, and everything in between. Houseboat Horror comes in the "everything in between" category. It's a shot on video slasher movie that I probably would never have seen if it hadn't now been available on one of my many online streaming services.

The plot is as simple as you'd expect it to be. A group of people end up in a fairly isolated location, somewhere that makes them more likely to be targeted by a vicious killer. It helps that the main characters are a bunch of rock musicians and the crew filming their music video, which creates instant tension with any locals that they encounter, and also allows viewers to look forward to all of the expected death scenes.

I'm not going to tell people that Houseboat Horror is a great film. It's not even a great slasher film. It doesn't seem too bad, however, when you consider the wild variations in quality that can be found in the world of SOV horror. Despite being far from an expert in these films, I already know some of the most notorious titles, and I know how much of an endurance test they can be. They're also a testament to the passion and determination of many film-makers though, and the best SOV movies still have something running through them that shows the good intentions buried underneath the messy final product. Houseboat Horror is one of those movies, and I spent the duration of it rooting for directors Kendal Flanagan and Ollie Martin to fully win me over. That never happened, largely due to the weak screenplay by Martin (and, yes, I am aware of how many slasher movies have a weak screenplay), but a couple of moments showed a level of care and technical proficiency that I hadn't expected.

It also doesn't help that the cast are a bit amateurish and clumsy, by and large. I am not going to spend too much time and space being overly critical of people who banded together to have some fun and get this made, but it's unsurprising to see that many of these cast members didn't go on to have lengthy and illustrious film careers, with Alan Dale, despite not being on top form, being the one notable exception. How he ended up in this is a mystery, and I'd love to hear from anyone who has that information, but he helps to lift things slightly just by being a recognisable face of someone you know has acted in more professional projects.

I liked this. It was endearing. The many flaws all worked to highlight just how much was stacked against Flanagan and Martin as they worked to get this made. It's a mess, and there are many scenes that are just disappointingly dull (a common failing of many SOV horror movies), and there's also an ending that lacks any tension whatsoever, but I still found myself smiling as the end credits rolled. I would watch it again. I'd recommend it to those looking for something to fan the flames of their nostalgia for the days of VHS, or to those looking for something undemanding that can be enjoyed in a group viewing. But I wouldn't recommend it to anyone looking for something remotely serious or well-crafted.

5/10

Saturday, 13 April 2024

Shudder Saturday: The Third Saturday In October (2022)

We have known for some time that nostalgia is a powerful tool when it comes to marketing and selling, and that has been a major part of many recent movie releases, from big blockbusters to the legacy sequels, and many horror movies that seem intent on recapturing that feeling you had when you went home with a videotape that contained some extra-nasty and traumatizing content. Sometimes that nostalgia takes the form of the kind of extreme splatter and practical effects that have been diluted and phased out by modern practices. Sometimes that nostalgia is presented via the entire aesthetic of a piece. The Third Saturday In October falls into the latter category.

It all starts with a scroll that explains the title. Not that the title needed more explanation, but maybe that is just me thinking that way. Anyway, an unrepentant killer is executed by the state, with only a couple of people turning up to witness the event. As this is a throwback to some old-school slasher fun, however, death is only a minor inconvenience in the journey of this killer. He is soon out to hack up unsuspecting victims, but there’s also time for people to goof around and start getting horny.

Having helmed a number of shorts and features throughout the past decade, he actually seems to have released his first film back in 2010, writer-director Jay Burleson uses the premise and concept here to show off how well he can commit to the grimy and endearingly crude replication of a special VHS horror find. It’s just a shame that he cannot do as well with the script and pacing, leading to the first two thirds of the film feeling like a bit of a slog.

Things are helped by the music and cinematography though, with compliments to Kevin Wooten and Chris Hilleke, respectively, for their work. This is definitely a case of some great audio and visual work in dire need of a much better framework to flesh out.

When it comes to the acting, you might say that everyone is in line with the material, but that’s not entirely correct. Some get to be a bit quirky and fun, such as Darius Willis in the role of Ricky Dean Logan, a character who insists on referring to the woman accompanying him on his hunt for a killer by her full name of Vicki Newton every time he speaks to her. K. J. Baker is a decent enough co-lead as the aforementioned Vicki Newton, but Lew Temple, Richard Garner, Libby Blake, Dre Bravo, Allison Shrum, and everyone else in the cast feels a bit underused or out of place. And Antonio Woodruff, in the role of the killer, Harding, is disappointingly blank throughout, playing a slasher so devoid of personality that they may as well have just put some kind of sports mask on his face and leaned further into the Friday The 13th vibe.

I have read some reviews of this that mention it is meant to be watched AFTER The Third Saturday In October Part V, but other reviews seemed to suggest that it didn't matter too much. There are no other instalments in between the two films, which adds to the fun of the main idea, so I will get to that one eventually (maybe even by next week), and I will try to figure out how the connections would work if the films were watched in reverse order. Who knows . . . maybe I will find elements there that help me to appreciate this a bit more. I am doubtful, but it could happen.

5/10

Saturday, 3 February 2024

Shudder Saturday: Sorority House Massacre (1986)

I think many of you will be able to understand why I mistakenly assumed that I had already seen Sorority House Massacre. I'd seen The Slumber Party Massacre movies, and I had seen The House On Sorority Row, but I hadn't actually seen any of the Sorority House Massacre movies. This weekend seemed like the right time to change that. But would the film be worth my time?

The story is simple, and not too dissimilar to one of the all-time great slasher movies, by the time everything is clarified in the third act. Beth (Angela O'Neill) is a new college student who starts to feel strange about her new living environment. It's like she's been there before, and the imagery that invades her mind isn't pleasant. She also seems to have some telepathic link with an escaped killer (John C. Russell), which makes things a bit stressful as she tries to settle in to college life and have some fun with her sorority sisters.

Written and directed by Carol Frank, her only directorial feature (after working in assistant roles on a couple of movies before this), this is a seriously underwhelming experience. It's always good to be wary of any slasher movie that came along in the second half of the 1980s. While not a golden rule, the sub-genre was certainly already showing signs of fatigue after the "halcyon days" that saw so many flood the market in the start of the decade. Sorority House Massacre brings nothing new to the table, but also doesn't do well enough with the basic elements that can provide simple entertainment for slasher movie fans.

I'll be generous enough to say that maybe one of the kills stands out, because of the way it leads to one character quickly figuring out that they need to flee if they want to stay alive, but even that is undermined by being one of the few moments that also throws in some gratuitous nudity alongside some of the most savage violence shown in the film.

You don't watch slasher movies for the acting, of course, but there isn't anyone here standing out, for better or worse. O'Neill is decent enough in the lead role, especially when you consider what she has to do with her character, and she's ably supported by those who float in and out of the main narrative (Wendy Martel, as Linda, being one of the more memorable). Russell has to look like a deranged killer, even when he's not actually shown in the act of deranged killing, and he does just fine. He's not the most memorable killer, but nothing about this is memorable.

I can't quite pin down why this fails. Although Frank does nothing special in the writing or directing department, she also does nothing horrible. The silly plot is paced well enough, the short runtime certainly helps, and there is some occasional interesting imagery, but it's hard to get excited about a finale that feels overshadowed by a real classic that most horror fans would prefer to be watching instead of this. Ironically, the familiarity experienced by the main character is a sensation ultimately experienced by most viewers, and I believe that most of us would rather watch something that tries to be different, even if it fails, than something that tries to repeat the success of work that it cannot hope to rival.

4/10

Saturday, 2 December 2023

Shudder Saturday: It's A Wonderful Knife (2023)

It's a fun premise, and one that many horror fans seemed to warm to as soon as the trailer dropped. What if you made It's A Wonderful Life, but had the lead character fail to realise that her non-existence would leave a killer free to continue a murder spree that she'd managed to stop one whole year ago? That's it. And you would think that was an easy way to have a lot of fun. It turns out that you need a bit more than just that great concept though.

Jane Widdop plays Winnie Carruthers, the young woman who becomes the George Bailey of this movie. Although things have been much better for her family since she dealt with a stab-happy killer the previous Christmas, she doesn't feel that anything has gone her way. Not getting into her chosen university, not having a decent boyfriend, and not even being given a thoughtful main Christmas present from her family. So she decides to wish that she'd never been born, which puts her in a strange and darker version of the town that she grew up in. A killer seems to be building up quite the bodycount, her parents don't know who she is, her brother is dead (because she wasn't there to save him), and people are just having a really bad time of things. Winnie eventually enlists the help of Bernie (Jess McLeod), a young woman ostracised by many of her peers, and she also manages to convince her cool aunt, Gale (Katharine Isabelle), of the reality of her weird circumstances. She cannot get through to her dad (Joel McHale) though, and she cannot convince enough people that the killer may be someone they see almost every single day. Meanwhile, Mayor Henry Waters (Justin Long) is reaping many benefits, and he might not want things to go back to how they were.

Director Tyler MacIntyre has a lot of fans in the horror genre, having helmed both Patchwork and Tragedy Girls in the past decade. While both of those films have flaws, they're also good enough to have marked McIntyre out as someone to keep an eye on. This film, written by Michael Kennedy (who was a co-writer on Freaky), feels like a step back. It's surprisingly unimaginative, far too tame when it comes to the kills, and doesn't feel as if it ever fully realises the potential of the premise. There's no real sense of mystery when it comes to the identity of the killer, the "butterfly effect" of Winnie's non-existence seems to run through a tiresome check-list of the most obvious negatives, and it lacks a sense of fun for most of the runtime (if you're not going to deliver bloody kills then at least make it fun).

It also doesn't help that Widdop feels like a disappointingly weak lead. I've not seen them in anything else, not that I can remember anyway, and I'm sorry to say that they don't have much screen presense, nor do they have the right way of delivering the dialogue when it is supposed to show them being emboldened and badass. McLeod is a lot better in her role, and Isabelle is always welcome onscreen, but nobody can do enough to make up for that notable mis-step in casting. Long tries his best, helped in his performance by capped teeth and mannerisms that make him as funny as he is creepy, but his energy is offset by the far-too-laid-back performance of McHale (hey, I like the guy, he doesn't work here though).

Perhaps part of my disappointment in this stems from my enthusiasm for it. I loved the concept, and the trailer did enough to win me over. I was hoping it would be a new seasonal slasher treat, despite the fact that we're definitely not short on those recently. It wasn't to be though. I hope MacIntyre finds something better for his next project, and I hope Kennedy goes back to co-writing as he hones his craft. And while I wasn't a fan of Widdop here, I am glad to have been introduced to McLeod, who seems to have built up a hefty filmography so far mostly full of shorts and TV work. I look forward to seeing her in more features in the years ahead.

The film may not be wonderful, but I can't dismiss it as awful either. It gets a bonus point for the title alone.

5/10

Sunday, 15 October 2023

Netflix And Chill: Killer Book Club (2022)

I retain a sense of optimism every time I dive into a film I have heard very little, and sometimes even nothing, about. This could be the gem that I can recommend to everyone else. This might be the best surprise of the year. That sense of optimism hasn't diminished, despite the real gems being few and far between. Killer Book Club is a film that had been on my radar for a month or so now, and I'd heard from a couple of people who quite enjoyed it. Sadly, I thought it was terrible.

After a prank goes wrong, leading to the death of a professor, a group of university friends vow to keep their grim secret just between themselves. Unfortunately, before you can say "I know what you did last semester", someone seems intent on avenging the death. It's a killer in the same clown outfit that the group were all wearing when they killed the professor. The killer is also letting people know what they are up to by detailing the kills in a book that is being published online, one chapter at a time. The main target seems to be Ángela (Veki Velilla), and she may have some dark secret in her past that is now endangering everyone around her.

Written by Carlos García Miranda, making his feature writing debut (I think) after years spent on shorts and TV episodes, Killer Book Club is a disappointingly straightforward and tame teen slasher flick at a time when there really needs to be something more to offer audiences who have seen the sub-genre go through a number of transformative phases throuught the past four or five decades. The design of the killer isn't impressive enough, the kills are shot with an emphasis on blood splashing around, but very little that is nasty (the best little gag simply reminded you of something done much better in Hot Fuzz), and the big finale feels far too close to another big slasher movie title, which doesn't help your enjoyment of the film while you're being reminded once again of a far superior film.

Director Carlos Alonso Ojea seems to think that the imagery and derivative storyline is enough to entertain horror movie fans. It's not, but he brings nothing to the table. I would politely suggest that any one of at least a dozen other Spanish directors could have done something better with this. I would also suggest a similar replacement scheme for the cast, who are all unable to do anything to overcome the weak script they have to work with.

Velilla is a disappointingly weak lead, to the point where I kept wondering if she was cast to enable some kind of surprise switcheroo at any point. By default, however, she stands out more than Álvaro Mel, Iván Pellicer, Priscilla Delgado, Hamza Zaidi, María Cerezuela, and anyone else onscreen.

People may think I have been too harsh on this, especially if they view it as a fairly inoffensive time-waster, but this is something that sums up the worst, and most cynical elements, of horror movies that are often served up to fans who will "eat up anything". We're in the middle of a great time for horror right now, and films like this bland and dull piece of crap are a complete waste of your time.

3/10

Thursday, 11 May 2023

Lovers Lane (1999)

Considering I had never heard of Lovers Lane before deciding to give it a blind buy when it received a shiny new disc release, my expectations were understandably low. There aren’t any big names leading the proceedings (Anna Faris has a supporting role, and she is the most well-known cast member, as far as I can tell), the plot revolved around the idea of the hook-handed killer we have seen utilised in one or two decent horror movies already, and it looked like a very traditional approach to the sub-genre while other slasher movies were trying to find fresh ways to deliver the gory goods.

While I was unfamiliar with most of the people onscreen, I was equally unfamiliar with director Jon Steven Ward and writers Geof Miller and Rory Veal. Or so I thought. I had seen a couple of other films written by Miller, but nothing that you would present to people as a standout script.

Aside from Faris onscreen, Lovers Lane focuses on a couple of young main characters played by Riley Snith and Erin Dean, and I didn’t mind either of them. While maybe not shining stars, both are likeable enough for you to care when they start to look more likely to meet the business end of a sharp hook. There’s also a fun turn from Sarah Lancaster, being both beautiful and entertainingly ruthless, and the main adults who end up spending a night trying to catch a killer are played by Matt Riedy (a sheriff), Richard Sanders (a doctor), and Suzanne Bouchard (school principal). Every adult has a teen who could be in grave danger, of course, and the cast does okay with a very weak script.

I haven’t given any full plot description here, mainly because there’s no point. An opening sequence has some gratuitous gore and nudity to establish the killer with the hook, and we then move forward years later to watch a night when that same killer escapes his secure accommodation. But horny teens still want to be horny teens, which allows for a good selection of victims.

While this is clearly never bothering the titles at the top of the slasher movie tree, Lovers Lane tries to keep everything fun for the majority of the runtime. No other moments equal the strength of the opening, but the pacing isn’t too bad, the characters generally do enough to feel like individuals, and the finale throws in enough fun twists and lunacy as it shows that it isn’t just the very familiar tale you thought it was going to be.

There are things that could be better, of course. From the music to the gore gags, and one or two more major death scenes wouldn’t have gone amiss, but this is an above-average slasher that remains worth your time for at least one viewing. And if you think it is the worst example of this type of thing, feel free to ask me about the ones that you should really continue to avoid at all costs.

6/10

Thursday, 27 April 2023

Funny Man (1994)

1994 wasn’t exactly a great time for the slasher movie, although I am saying that with the knowledge that someone might immediately inform me of one or two great titles I have simply forgotten about while figuring out the best way to open this review. Funny Man isn’t just a slasher movie though. It’s a British slasher movie. And it’s a British slasher movie that gives viewers a new slasher “icon” in the shape of the titular character, a killer who looks like a demonic jester and has the patter of an old-fashioned working club comic.

Christopher Lee plays a character who loses a house to Max Taylor (Benny Young) in a game of cards. Don’t get excited by the appearance of Lee though. His screentime totals up to about a minute or so, which makes it clear that the film-makers had the star for about half a day. Anyway, the Taylor family move into the house and soon find themselves in the middle of some major strangeness. They are unaware of the Funny Man (played by Tim James), but he is always ready to have fun with anyone who enters his territory. Thankfully, more people are due to arrive, in the shape of Max’s brother (Johnny, played by Matthew Devitt) and a motley mix of individuals accompanying him on his journey, which means more deaths can be planned.

Amazing as it might seem, this isn’t the only feature film from writer-director Simon Sprackling. It is his first film though, and suffers from the flaws that many directorial debuts can have. The 93-minute runtime drags in places, there’s misplaced confidence in the central idea (although there are moments when the oddness of the lead character actually works in a way that is both amusing and horrifying), and the acting style throughout is majorly over the top, almost pantomime at times.

I don’t want to spend much time being too harsh on the cast. Most of them do what is asked of them, whether it’s pretending to be a Scooby Doo character (Thelma Fudd, played by Rhona Cameron, someone I used to enjoy for her stand up comedy), being a pretty useless human psychic (Pauline Black), or getting themselves lured in by the least convincing “pop up” strip club ever (Chris Walker). The majority of the film rests on the shoulders of James, who really strives to embody a mix of Jim Bowen and Freddy Krueger (or maybe the Leprechaun), and it IS fun to watch him move from delivering his patter to viewers, breaking the fourth wall a number of times, to acting bored and bemused by the stupidity of his victims. He cannot do enough to save the film entirely, but fair play on him for doing as good a job as he does.

There’s an admirable attempt here to do something quite unique, something very British and very surreal at times, but it sadly doesn’t work. There should have been some more background or details throughout, a bigger world and story for the Funny Man, and perhaps an even quicker move into the more bonkers atmosphere. You do get some good gore gags though, and it’s a hard one to forget.

Oh, and there’s now extra horror added to the third act when you see the Funny Man dressed up in a way that is meant to emulate Jimmy Savile. I bet Sprackling didn’t realise just how terrifying that one gag would become.

3/10

Tuesday, 4 April 2023

Bring It On: Cheer Or Die (2022)

When I heard that someone had come up with the ridiculous idea of taking the Bring It On movie series into slasher territory, well, I was delighted. Having enjoyed all of the other films, to varying degrees (although I have yet to see Bring It On: Worldwide Showdown), I figured this might be a good way to reinvigorate a series that had faded away from the minds of movie fans some years ago. There's nothing wrong with a movie series creeping towards a natural end point, of course, but I just have a soft spot for the various cheerleading dramas I have been watching for almost two decades now.

Written by Rebekah McKendry and Dana Schwartz, and directed by Karen Lam, this instalment develops a story by Alyson Fouse (the main writer involved with every sequel to the 2004 original, as well as many other projects). A cheerleading team have to practice late at night in an empty building, but they soon find themselves being stalked by a mysterious killer. That's all there is to it.

Kerri Medders plays the main character, Abby, Tiera Skovbye is McKayla Miller, and Marlowe Zimmerman and Makena Zimmerman play sisters, Paige and Evee Simmons, and everyone else really blends in with the whole cheerleading squad. The one exception is Missi Pyle, making a small cameo in the role of Principal Simmons. It's not that the cast aren't given one or two characteristics supposed to help them stand out from the crowd. It's just that everyone spends a lot of time looking perky in a cheerleading uniform, or just coming in and out of the plot to do nothing more than up the potential bodycount.

While the mix of main elements should be fun, it sadly never reaches its full potential. There's no real tension, kills are disappointingly tame and bloodless affairs, and the comedy is ineffective (although works a bit better when just juxtaposing the attempts to maintain a sunny disposition in the face of a situation going from bad to worse). The expected third act reveal is fun, and far from the most ridiculous motivation that we've seen given to crazed killers, but things get a bit too silly when the writers think that using cheerleading as an integral part of the finale will help to justify branding this under the Bring It On umbrella. Maybe it was some kind of stipulation, I don't know, but it's disappointingly mishandled.

The cast all do well enough in their roles, and fair play to everyone who manages to do the kind of cheerleading moves I wouldn't have even managed when I was a teenager, but they're stuck in a film that doesn't help them. McKendry and Schwartz fail to pinpoint the exact tone they want throughout, staggering from one moment to another like a pair of drunk friends heading homeward after a big night on the town, and Lam does nothing to help, seemingly happy to present everything without any extra style or skill.

The central concept - that complete lurch into a very different subgenre - is strong enough to gain some goodwill, but it's a shame that Bring It On: Cheer Or Die wasn't allowed to lean fully into the horror. It's equally depressing that the writers couldn't do better with the comedy. I can't bring myself to hate this, but I won't cheer it.

3/10