Netflix And Chill: Beowulf (2007)

While long the film has languished on my shelf,
I now picked it on Netflix to watch for myself.
Leaving the bluray inside its case,
A sign of my movie collecting addiction disgrace.

Ere I was soon feeling slightly remiss,
Being presented the vision of Robert Zemeckis.
An epic poem is translated for the layman,
By writers Roger Avary and that Neil Gaiman.

Things start with Anthony Hopkins and Robin Wright,
Crispin Glover plays Grendel, who gives them a fright,
There's also John Malkovich, and plenty of mead,
Then Ray Winstone comes along to portray our lead.

The epic tale is told with motion-capture animation,
Allowing Zemeckis to show us his grand imagination,
But the end result is a massive misfire,
Despite showing our heroes fighting monsters with ire. 

Brendan Gleeson is here, and Angelina Jolie too,
Alison Lohman plays Beowulf's secret boo,
But none of them work as well as they could,
The technical gimmickry not doing them good.

There's a decent score here from Alan Silvestri,
I'm not sure how to judge the cinematography from Robert Presley,
Darkness and light are used to impress,
But the technique's not perfected, it's a bit of a mess.

There's no real sense of grandiose scale,
Most viewers will mark this as one giant fail.
Zemeckis is now much more devoted to tech,
His film-making style now a glossy pile of dreck.

Here there be dragons, and golden men born of flame,
But it's lacking in thrills and the director's to blame.
I knew when I bought this years ago it was a bit of a risk,
But now I know it won't be long until I resell my disc.

3/10

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Prime Time: Here (2024)

I've said it many times before, and I will undoubtedly say it again, but we definitely lost something when Robert Zemeckis started to become more and more seduced by technology. He was a director once able to use the best special effects to tell wonderful and hugely entertaining stories (having helmed at least two features that could easily be considered absolute classics of the 1980s), but he started to focus more and more on FX-laden movies that just seemed designed to showcase the FX work.

And now we have Here, a film with a couple of gimmicks to attract or repel viewers, depending on your reaction to the main premise. With the camera largely locked off for most of the runtime, Here shows us a house, and the people who have inhabited that house over the decades and centuries. We also see the space as it was before the house was built, sometimes seeing people coming and going from the house across from that space, sometimes seeing people moving through the space when it was just untamed wilderness, and sometimes even seeing a bit of prehistoric action. Although various people come and go, the two main characters are Richard and Margaret, played by Tom Hanks and Robin Wright. They are digitally de-aged for certain scenes, and we get to see most of their lifetime play out in front of us. 

Based on a graphic novel by Richard McGuire, turned into screenplay fork by Zemeckis and Eric Roth, the visual style here may put many people off, but it's a nice way to keep things moving along and keep jumping in between the various generations. What you see are various panels appearing in different areas of the screen as the image transitions from the present to the past, to the very past, and back towards the present. The visuals sometimes lag behind the audio, but it works to keep viewers engaged in a way that wouldn't otherwise wouldn't be possible with such a static camera set-up.

Hanks and Wright are very enjoyable when they get to be front and centre, but they share a lot of the screentime with Paul Bettany and Kelly Reilly (as the parents), Michelle Dockery and Gwilym Lee (a couple who lived in an older incarnation of the house), Ophelia Lovibond and David Fynn (a different couple who also made the place their home at one time), and Nicholas Pinnock, Nikki Amuka-Bird, and a handful of others helping to keep the space busy.

The big surprise, however, is how little the film really rests on the shoulders of the cast. They help, and Bettany and Reilly have some particularly effective moments, but this is a film that actually allows Zemeckis to marry the tech to a strong heartbeat in a way that is unexpectedly satisfying. While it's a technical exercise, one that may only appeal to a minority able to tolerate the use of the format, it's actually more interested in sharing a positive message about the shared experience of life. Birth, love, pain, loss, sacrifice, laughter, tears, and, of course, death.

I don't think I'll ever rewatch this, and I cannot think of anyone I would strongly recommend it to, but I enjoyed it while it was on. Everyone involved, on both sides of the camera, is doing very good work, and there's a lot of sweetness, but, unlike the fixtures and furnishings of the house depicted here, there isn't all that much below the surface. 

6/10

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The Witches (2020)

I was not won over when I saw the trailer for The Witches, a remake of the 1990 Nicolas Roeg film, one of the most legendarily-terrifying movies aimed at kids, adapted from the book by Roald Dahl. It looked as if it had been completely sanitised, and the choice of Anne Hathaway as the main villain seemed like a bit of miscasting.

Well, while it's worth bearing in mind that it has been many years since I last saw the original movie, this ended up being a decent remake/re-adaptation. The biggest problem it has is that it feels quite redundant. I don't recall anyone crying out for another version of the tale, and the film itself, while very competent, and enjoyable, just never gives you anything to make it more worthy of your time than the previous incarnation, which is now 30 years old.

Witches are everywhere. And they hate children. When our young hero (Jahzir Bruno), actually named Hero Boy, and his grandma (Octavia Spencer) head away for a break at a lovely hotel, they don't realise that their timing could not be worse. The hotel is also hosting a meeting for a number of witches, led by the Grand High Witch (Anne Hathaway). They have a plan for children, and that plan involves turning them into mice. All of them. Our young hero gets caught overhearing this plan, so is immediately mouse-ified, alongside a young man named Bruno Jenkins (Codie-Lei Eastick). Accompanied by a surprise ally, the mice must reach grandma, tell her what is going on, and find out if there's a way to reverse the effects of the potion.

Directed by Robert Zemeckis, who also co-wrote the screenplay with Kenya Barris and Guillermo del Toro, The Witches gets a number of important things right. It keeps things quite scary, especially for younger viewers (parents may want to either check this over beforehand or be prepared for extra-tight cuddles while watching). It transfers the action to 1960s America without losing anything vital to the overall tone or atmosphere. The cast are also a bonus. Bruno does well with his screentime, Spencer is a wonderful grandma, Stanley Tucci is excellent as the hotel manager, and Hathaway is clearly having a lot of fun in her role, complete with an undetermined accent and inability to comprehend people around her who don't give her immediate agreement and compliance. You also get an enjoyable voiceover from Chris Rock.

It's a shame that the main thing it gets wrong is something many can probably guess before even seeing one second of the film. Yes, with Robert Zemeckis at the helm you get an over-reliance on CGI, some of it nicely done and some of it that will make you yearn for some practical effects. I like the depiction of the witches when shown in their natural form (bald, with claws, no toes on their feet, and wide mouths with sharp teeth), but even that serves as a reminder of how great the practical effects were in the 1990 movie. And as for the CGI mice, let's not dwell on those. There's a pretty decent black cat that I was impressed by, and numerous enjoyable little touches here and there, but it's definitely a case of Mr. Zemeckis once again playing with some of his favourite new toys while some old dependables could have worked equally well.

So, unless my memory is blanking out one, we have had three movies in the past decade or so made from Roald Dahl books that had been filmed before. One was quite bad, one was quite good, and now this one sits almost squarely in the middle. I enjoyed it while it was on, but I won't rush to rewatch it, and am now more eager than ever to revisit the version that terrified me when I was young (and I wasn't even that young, being about 15-16 when it was released).

6/10

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Mubi Monday: Death Becomes Her (1992)

Although you may worry whenever you hear the words "a film directed by Robert Zemeckis that also serves as an FX showcase", there's really no need. In fact, it's worth remembering that Zemeckis spent many years perfectly marrying entertaining concepts to the latest technology that would help him best present things. Then he got a bit carried away with himself.

Death Becomes Her is the tale of a man (Dr. Ernest Menville, played by Bruce Willis) who leaves his girlfriend (Helen Sharp, played by Goldie Hawn) to embark on a life with a famous and beautiful actress (Madeline Ashton, played by Meryl Streep). This changes all three individuals for the worse. Ernest becomes bitter, and drinks excessively while he works on dead bodies. Madeline is afraid of ageing, and seeks solace in the company of at least one younger man. And Helen is just miserable at what she lost, and wants some revenge. When the day comes for that revenge to take place, everything is complicated by the fact that Madeline has managed to get her hands on a potion that will give her immortality. But being immortal means you really need to look after the one body you have.

Written by Martin Donovan and David Koepp, this is a wonderful black comedy that blends The Picture Of Dorian Grey with no small amount of Sunset Blvd. Although these three characters could have been from any walk of life, the fact that one is a doctor and one an actress allows for some more pointed digs at the notions of vanity, the pressures on so many in the entertainment industry to have cosmetic surgery, and the attitudes and failings of people who cannot find themselves content with all of their blessings in life.

Zemeckis does a great job here. Using the first half of the film to weave lots of fun jokes in between the character development (there's not much, but it's there) before treating the halfway point as a turnstile into the FX-laden second half, which leads to plenty of superb visual gags working alongside the dialogue. The special effects, a mix of practical gags and computer work, hold up brilliantly. Almost thirty years later, this is better than even some major films released in the last decade.

Although she didn't enjoy the experience of working with all of the special effects, Streep is on top form in her role. All three leads are great, with Willis being atypically schlubby and Hawn a bit more calculating and sharp than usual, but Streep stays just a little ahead of everyone, thanks to it being quite a different role for her and the fact that she's the focus of many of the memorable effects. Ian Ogilvy also raises a smile in his brief appearance, and Isabella Rossellini is the mysterious and alluring woman who offers up the chance of immortality before belatedly adding words of caution.

Not entirely dissimilar to many short tales that have warned us against the perils of trying to gain immortality (from the many miserable vampires who have found the experience lacking to the kind of stories you get from Ray Bradbury and Tales From The Crypt, to name just a couple), Death Becomes Her is slick, macabre fun that also proves to be eminently rewatchable.

7/10

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Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988)

While it may not seem quite the stunning feat it was back in the late '80s, Who Framed Roger Rabbit remains a unique, and astonishingly good, piece of work. It's a bit of noir mixed in with fun for all the family that benefits immensely from the improved technology allowing actors to more realistically act alongside cartoons.

Bob Hoskins is the private detective, named Eddie Valiant, who ends up trying to find an answer to the title of the movie. Roger Rabbit (voiced by Charles Fleischer) seems to have been driven into a rage by revelations of his beautiful wife, Jessica (voiced by an uncredited Kathleen Turner), playing pat-a-cake with Marvin Acme (Stubby Kaye). Roger insists that he's innocent, of course, and there's the very suspicious Judge Doom (Christopher Lloyd) making it easier for Valiant to believe that something stinks, but will it all be enough to get him to take the case seriously and do all he can. After all, Valiant hates toons, and has never been back to Toontown ever since his brother was killed there.

The big factor that made Who Framed Roger Rabbit such a big deal when it was released, and still a fairly big deal to this day, isn't actually the blending of live action work and animation, which is impressive, but the sheer variety and number of cartoon characters mingling onscreen. As well as Roger and Jessica (with the latter being one of the sexiest cartoons to be allowed in a family movie - look, all of us young boys thought it at the time, and we've all kept thinking it ever since so don't judge me), there are appearances from *deep breath* Mickey Mouse, Bugs Bunny, Dumbo, Betty Boop, Donald Duck, Daffy Duck, cast members from Fantasia, Sylvester & Tweety Pie, Porky Pig, Goofy, Yosemite Sam, Foghorn Leghorn, Michigan J. Frog and many others. It's a veritable who's who of animated stars, unlikely to ever happen again.

Thankfully, the few human stars also do good work, with Bob Hoskins in top form as Valiant, a private eye who has let himself go over the years and is now more comfortable cracking open a bottle of bourbon than cracking a case. Lloyd is enjoyably creepy as Judge Doom, and Joanna Cassidy is adorable as the tough woman who puts up with Valiant in the hope that he will find himself again.

Director Robert Zemeckis handles everything with ease, which is as viewers would expect from this man who does so love to play with any toys he can get his hands on, and the script, by Peter S. Seaman and Jeffrey Price (based on the book, "Who Censored Roger Rabbit" by Gary K. Wolf), is packed full of great lines, references and gags to both the world of noir and also, more obviously, the cartoons of the past and the present.

A real triumph for everyone involved, including composer Alan Silvestri, cinematographer Dean Cundey, and, last but by no means least, everyone in the art and special effects departments, this holds up as one of those rare joys - a movie full of special effects that actually uses the technology to complement the story, as opposed to using distracting graphics and gimmickry to fill in a lot of empty space.

8/10

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Used Cars (1980)

Used car salesmen have long been the source of mirth on the big screen, on the small screen and in other forms of entertainment. They're all fast talkers in cheap suits with a smooth style that lasts right up until the time someone drives a purchased car off the forecourt. Or so many of us assume.

Kurt Russell stars in this comedy that contains plenty of used cars and he's the fastest talking salesman with the smoothest style that you could possibly imagine. I'm not sure if he wears the cheapest suits but he's the ultimate used car salesman. Sadly, there's trouble on the horizon as his boss, Luke Fuchs (Jack Warden), is harassed so much by his brother, Roy L Fuchs (also Jack Warden), who owns the competing lot across the road that he ends up dying. The salesmen (Russell, Gerrit Graham and Frank McRae, a mechanic who is roped into things) can't let anyone know that their boss has died so they start to enjoy a new-found freedom and try more and more outrageous stunts to get customers trying out their cars. An extra complication arises when the estranged daughter of Luke, Barbara Jane Fuchs (Deborah Harmon), turns up and wants to catch up with her father.

Directed by Robert Zemeckis, who also co-wrote the screenplay with Bob Gale, Used Cars is a lot of fun from start to finish. The script is full of great lines, the pacing is perfect and the finale is actually as wildly entertaining as it is pretty ridiculous. There are also some fantastic stunts in the mix as a huge number of cars are driven from a to b while Roy L. Fuchs tries to stop them reaching their destination.

The cast is great. In fact, Russell in the lead role makes everything feel like a Disney movie aimed at adults. It doesn't require the biggest stretch of the imagination to think of his character, 'Rudy' Russo, as an adult incarnation of Dexter Riley. Gerrit Graham and Frank McRae are both a lot of fun, with the former playing a character who is obsessed with superstition. Jack Warden is always good to watch and in this film . . . . . . . he's good to watch. Deborah Harmon is an enjoyable female presence and holds her own admirably amidst the predominantly male cast. Al Lewis, best known to many as Grandpa Munster, is excellent as Judge H. H. Harrison (AKA "Hanging" Judge Harrison). Joe Flaherty and Michael McKean have small, fun roles and fans of Dick Miller may want to keep their eyes peeled - he appears for a second or two, billed as Man In Bed.

Used Car isn't quite as good as some other movies that focus on similiar characters (Tin Men being the first, and one of the best, to spring to mind) but it's consistently amusing and makes the most of a great cast, headed by the charming and silver-tongued Russell.

7/10

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