Christmas On My Mind (2019)

Based on a book, “The Goodbye Bride” by Denise Hunter, Christmas On My Mind is exactly the kind of Christmas TV movie fare that you expect to find filling out afternoon schedules at this time of year. I don’t know if the book was written that way, or if it was adapted into such a seasonal treat by writer Kristen Hansen (who has, as is so often the way, given viewers a few Christmas movies over her career), but I was certainly surprised to find that there was some literary source material here. Because it’s fluff. Perfectly acceptable fluff, but fluff nonetheless.

Ashley Greene plays Lucy, a woman who starts the movie by falling and banging her head on the sidewalk. She is carrying a wedding dress, which makes her think she is very close to her wedding day with Zach (Andrew W. Walker). That isn’t the case though. Lucy has a whole new fiancé (Brad, played by Clayton James). She just cannot remember him, the knock to her head having wiped out her memory of the last two years. If you have seen even one other movie in this vein then you know where this is going. The important thing is that the characters have time for some small-town traditions: picking a great tree, ice skating, participating in the snowman-building competition, and baking a home-made pie that will be sold at auction.

You and I both know that if someone hit their head and suddenly couldn’t remember the last two years of their life then they would, or should, be placed in the care of dedicated healthcare professionals for an extended period of observation and attempted rehabilitation. But this is Christmas TV movie land, which means a doctor just smiles, says they can’t find anything physically wrong, and suggests that the patient just keeps doing what they were doing two years ago and hopes that memories eventually return. Which is exactly what our main character does. To be fair, it eventually works, just in time for the end credits.

Directed by Maclain Nelson, who moved into TV movies after a directorial career he kicked off with the fun Vamp U, this is competently-made fare that is elevated slightly by some of the main cast members. There are no surprises, of course, although it is nice to see more than one main character who needs a guiding hand back to their preferred path, instead of someone being absolutely right while anyone with a different view is absolutely wrong. And the main storyline may revolve around Lucy trying to get her memory back, but that ultimate aim could end up revealing some painful lies, whether they come from other people or from within herself.

I realise none of that is making this film sound any different from the hundreds of other films you could watch this festive season, fair enough, but it’s all sold on the charm of the leads. Greene is perfect for this kind of thing, she is likable and cute and convincingly strong-willed when she knows what result she wants to achieve. Walker is almost equally good, the standard handsome and harmless male who defines the word “safe” and offers support throughout, and James gamely portrays the standard non-true-love interest, trying to be understanding and patient while also being bemused by people who can just spend lots of time being all Christmassy and free from work duties. Preston Vanderslice and Donna Benedicto provide main support, as Zach’s brother and Lucy’s assistant, respectively, and Jackée Harry plays that surprisingly nonchalant doctor.

I liked this. I might even be tempted to rewatch it one day, but it’s worth emphasizing once again that Christmas movies get rated and critiqued as Christmas movies. I wouldn’t choose to watch this at any other time of year, I doubt I will ever rewatch it, but I consider it a good example of this kind of thing. And not just because I really like Ashley Greene (although that didn’t hurt it).

6/10

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Netflix And Chill: Aftermath (2021)

Ashley Greene and Shawn Ashmore play Natalie and Kevin Dadich, a married couple who are trying to make things work after Natalie had an affair. They're dealing with the aftermath of it all. Kevin also has a job at which he cleans up the mess left by crime scenes. He deals with aftermath there. Plotting a fresh start, the couple buy a house that was the site of a grisly murder-suicide, but it soon turns out that perhaps the blood and guts at the scene wasn't the only aftermath. I think you can see how the makers of this film decided on the title. Strange things start happening once the couple have moved into their new home. Noises make it sound as if someone is in the house, things go missing and then reappear elsewhere, and deliveries of porn start turning up that Kevin swears he never ordered. There are also adverts placed online that put the couple at risk of harm, which escalates things to the point where they end up dealing with local law enforcement, specifically Officer Richardson (Sharif Atkins).

Directed by Peter Winther, and written by Dakota Gorman, Aftermath is the kind of enjoyable thriller that will be predictable to anyone who has seen one or two notable thrillers from the past few decades. It's pretty obvious from the start where things are going, and viewers will remains a few steps ahead of the main characters. Which isn't to say this is bad. There are a few set-pieces scattered throughout this that are genuinely creepy, and impressive in the way they're executed. This is a thriller that creeps very close to horror territory at times, and the third act is enjoyably satisfying and tense. Considering the relatively small filmographies belonging to both Winther and Gorman, this may stand out as the best from both of them. It's easy to dismiss as slick nonsense, especially when characters keep wandering around in the dark, but it's bloody enjoyable nonetheless.

Greene and Ashmore do well enough in the lead roles, fairly believable as the married couple with a very strained relationship. Atkins is solid in his role, Jamie Kaler and Travis Coles lighten things up slightly, playing workmates who help to clean up crime scenes with elbow grease and gallows humour, and Diana Hopper plays Avery, a classroom partner who is there to add potential strain/temptation to the central relationship, although she gets to show quite early on that she's just a good friend. Britt Baron is a highlight, playing Natalie's sister, Dani, and I'll happily watch any film that gives her a decent amount of screentime (having been a fan since enjoying her work in GLOW).

Set up at the very beginning as "based on a true story", be sure to take that with a pinch of salt and just enjoy the whole thing for what it is, an effective thriller that does enough right to make you overlook the more implausible moments. It gets a bit darker than you might expect, and is all the better for it. A perfect film to stick on for an evening when you want a few goosebumps.

7/10

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Accident Man (2018)

If you look back through the filmography of director Jesse V. Johnson it doesn't really have anything that marks him out as someone you can rely on to deliver solid film fun. I might be being very unfair there, having not yet actually seen any of his other movies, but that's just how it is. But having now seen Accident Man, and enjoyed it, I may have to give some of his earlier movies a shot.

I decided to give this a go because of Scott Adkins in the main role. Adkins is a decent action star and I hadn't seen him in anything for a while. And it was a Saturday night with nothing planned.

Mike Fallon (Adkins) is a contract killer who specialises in making the deaths look like accidents, or sometimes suicides. He works for a firm that also employs other killers, all with their particular styles (one uses poison, one generally just goes mental with an axe, etc), and all is going well enough until Fallon's ex-girlfriend is murdered. It was obviously a professional job, although made to look like a random burglary gone wrong, and Fallon can't contain his anger, which leads to him questioning the people who work alongside him. And when I say questioning them I actually mean fighting them until he finds out information that leads him to fight someone else.

Based on a comic book, with a screenplay co-written by Adkins and Stu Small, this is an unpretentious little film that should keep action movie fans delighted from start to finish. The humour of the material doesn't always work, which is the fault of both the script and the delivery of the dialogue, and you have to kiss goodbye to any idea of believability, but none of that matters when the fights are happening.

As well as our leading man, you also get Michael Jai White, Ray Park, Ross O'Hennessy, Amy Johnston, and Ray Stevenson all impressing with their physicality onscreen. The most impressive moments involve Adkins, White, and Park, but everyone has at least one decent moment, and Johnston stands out as the lone female who is more than a match for the men around her. There are also roles for David Paymer and Ashley Greene, as well as a cameo for Nick Moran, and they're all decent, if a lot less involved in the punching and kicking sequences.

Johnson doesn't really do much to take this up another notch, although I'm not sure how much more he could do when you consider the limitations of the leading man (Adkins has got the moves but he sometimes falters with other aspects of acting like . . . well . . . acting), but it's also worth noting that he doesn't do anything to ruin the whole experience. Sometimes that is more than enough.

Accident Man has quite a few faults, undeniably, but they're easy to overlook if you're looking specifically for the kind of violent entertainment that this absolutely delivers.

7/10

There's a DVD here.
Americans can get a Blu here.

The Apparition (2012)

There are a few bells and whistles on this movie in an attempt to supplement the supernatural stuff with some pseudo-science, but viewers won't be fooled for a second. This is a simple ghost flick, and it's a simple ghost flick that never does enough to raise it above the level of average. That's a great shame, because it has the potential to be something really good on a number of occasions.

Ashley Greene and Sebastian Stan star as Kelly and Ben, a young couple moving into their new home. It's not long until things start to go bump in the night. The couple seem to be perplexed by just what is going on, but Ben may know a bit more than he's letting in, especially considering the frantic messages that he's been receiving from Patrick (Tom Felton), an old friend that he doesn't seem to want to speak to any more.

With its familiar structure - opening scares, calm introduction to main characters, building of tension, standard third act stuff complete with twist that can be seen coming a mile away - and the fact that it's covering some well-worn territory, it's no surprise that The Apparition fails to stand out from so many other modern horror movies. Writer-director Todd Lincoln has a few good ideas, and creates some great moments of quiet unease in the first half of the movie, but it soon becomes apparent that he can't sustain that quality for the entire movie. When things start to unravel, it's fast and unpleasant, dragging the film down and never recovering.

Greene is a decent actress (she's an actress that I really like, at any rate) and she does a perfectly adequate job here, as does Sebastian Stan. Felton is . . . . . . . . another matter entirely. I want to like Felton, I really do, but he seems intent on filling up his post-Potter career with either bad movies (like the godawful 13 Hrs) or mediocre-to-poor performances in good movies (Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes). He breaks the pattern ever so slightly here by giving a mediocre performance in a mediocre movie.

This isn't a painful viewing experience, it's relatively short at about 82 minutes, but it's not one that I can imagine anyone revisiting. It's not good enough for horror fans, and I doubt that it's even good enough for the more casual horror viewer.

5/10

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