Netflix And Chill: Secret Obsession (2019)

Peter Sullivan is a name you may recognise if, like me, you enjoyed watching all of the snow-filled TV movies we have filling up the schedules every Christmas time. He's done at least a dozen of them, which will come as no surprise to you once you have seen this unthrilling thriller that is now presented by Netflix.

On the one hand, I try my best to avoid spoilers whenever I review movies. I really do. I am not one of those people who thinks "the film is 50 years old anyway so it doesn't matter". And I certainly don't agree with the idea of "I thought it was crap anyway so here's how it ends", which I think is a particularly shitty way to express your negative view of something. Just because you hated something doesn't mean that everyone else will agree with you. On the other hand, and this is not an exaggeration, it's pretty much impossible to spoil Secret Obsession. If you saw the trailer then you know how it ends. If you didn't see the trailer, don't worry, everything is completely obvious within the first few minutes.

But, if you really don't believe, or trust, me . . . . *SPOILERS AHEAD*

Brenda Song plays Jennifer Williams, a young woman who starts the movie looking quite afraid until she's struck by a car, ending up in hospital with some horrible injuries and memory loss. Her loving husband, Russell (Mike Vogel), wants to get her home as soon as he can, just to make sure she can rest and recuperate in peace, and not at all because he obviously had something to do with the opening sequence. Jennifer rests up, occasionally thinking about everything she notices around her in a way that gets her spidey-sense tingling. Russell, meanwhile, acts suspiciously, then acts more suspiciously, and finally just reveals the dark core that viewers have known was there since the very beginning, all in time for a grand finale that sees the two leads joined by dogged Detective Frank Page (Dennis Haysbert).

There's something mesmerising about just how amazingly straightforward Secret Obsession is. There's no way that anyone involved could have thought they were making a real thriller. I'll admit that I wondered at what point this was going to change from the glossy nonsense I was enjoying to the twisted nastiness we got in The Perfection, but I didn't enjoy the movie any less when I realised that it was going to provide absolutely no surprises. As strange as it may seem, this proves to be quite the treat because of how resolutely it hits all of the expected beats without any of the tension, or twists, you might expect from it.

I still have to say that everyone does a decent job here, because they seem to do exactly what they're aiming to do. Sullivan directs everything with a safe, made-for-TV, feel that only ever comes close to pushing the boundaries during one moment (Russell cradling Jennifer's injured foot), the script, co-written by Sullivan and Kraig Wenman, is along the lines of a plot you would have enjoyed during the heady days of Sunset Beach, and the performances are absolutely in line with the material. Song spends most of her scenes either looking vulnerable or looking for a way to escape, or both, Vogel LOOKS like a charming psychopath throughout, and Haysbert does the suspicious and determined detective act well without going too over the top.

This is awful, in many ways. It's also kind of wonderful. It's the movie equivalent of a fast food treat. Ultimately bad for you, full of crap, designed to be sold to as many people as possible, and yet it's enjoyable enough for the ten minutes you spend eating it, even if you know you will crave something proper to eat within a few hours. Watch this, enjoy it, and then seek out something better to help get rid of the aftertaste.

5/10

Poseidon (2006)

A remake of a movie that remains my favourite disaster movie of all time (The Poseidon Adventure), Poseidon would seem to be a movie not really worth bothering about. How could it ever hope to top the fantastic original? Well, let's just cut to the chase here, it doesn't. It does, however, make for a decent bit of entertainment in its own right, thanks to a decent cast and solid direction from Wolfgang Petersen, who is no stranger to drama in submerged vessels (as viewers of the magnificent Das Boot will agree).

This adaptation may take place almost a quarter of a century after the original movie, but there's very little different in the overall premise. That's unsurprising, the main premise is so good that it needs no tinkering. A large and lovely cruise ship, the Poseidon, is hit by a freak wave out in the middle of the ocean and a group of people decide that their best bet for survival is to get to the bottom of the ship, which is now the part of the vessel now lying ABOVE the water. So the folk start to climb up and up on a perilous journey, doing their best to stay ahead of rising water levels, avoid explosions and fires and keep their footing as they move higher.

As you might expect, there are a number of scenes in Poseidon that are all about spectacle. Thankfully, the special effects are so well done that the moments of spectacle are really . . . . . . . . spectacular. Seriously, the visuals are consistently impressive, which is kind of a minimum requirement now for the big-budget disaster movies.

Special effects aren't everything though, as almost everyone would agree. The focus of the movie sways between the destruction of Poseidon and the perilous journey of the characters, which is why it's a good job that the various cast members all do well in their roles.

Kurt Russell and Josh Lucas are the two leaders of the group, men with different styles who have the same inner strength and strong will. Russell's character has added motivation as he also does his best to keep his daughter (Emmy Rossum) and her young fella (Mike Vogel) safe. Jacinda Barrett plays a woman whose main concern is her young son (played by Jimmy Bennett), Mia Maestro plays a stowaway and Richard Dreyfuss is the oldest member of the group. There are also small roles for Freddy Rodriguez and Andre Braugher. Oh, and Kevin Dillon goes over the top as the asshole of the group. I guess I should also warn anyone who dislikes the singing voice of Stacy "Fergie" Ferguson, they will roll their eyes as she entertains the cruise ship passengers during the opening scenes of the movie.

The script by Mark Protosevich (working from the novel by Paul Gallico, with some nods to the 1972 film) is perfectly serviceable. This kind of film has very few surprises, therefore the script isn't exactly full of great twists, turns and character reveals. It sketches out the relationships, it goes for the easy moments of emotional manipulation and it moves the survivors from one problem on to the next. For me, that makes the script just fine for a disaster movie.

Everything - script, cast, special effects - is brought together masterfully by director Petersen, who paces things perfectly and keeps the camera moving around in a way that never lets viewers forget how much worse the whole situation is getting for every minute that the ship is capsized.

I really didn't expect to enjoy Poseidon as much as I did. My love for the original movie is so great, I just didn't expect to see around that mental block. The fact that I ended up thinking about buying this as soon as the end credits started rolling is testament to what a pleasant surprise it was.

7/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Poseidon-Blu-ray-Region-Free-Russell/dp/B002U5741G/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1369089887&sr=8-2&keywords=poseidon