Netflix And Chill: Deep Impact (1998)

Despite becoming known at the time as "the comet film that isn't Armageddon", I have long been curious about whether or not my opinion of Deep Impact would be the same as it was when I first saw it. I thought it was a bit dull, suffered from some mis-casting in a couple of main roles, and basically proved to be a much harder sell due to it being, in technical terms, "a bit of a bummer" in comparison to the woohah jingoism and blockbuster silliness of Armageddon.

It turns out that my opinion remains almost exactly the same as it was. 

A huge comet is heading to Earth. Young Leo Biederman (Elijah Wood) is happy to have spotted it in the sky and had his name attached to it. Unfortunately, it's on a collision course with our planet. This becomes known to the President Of The United States (Morgan Freeman) before most of the population are informed, but a hungry reporter (Jenny Lerner, played by Téa Leoni) also stumbles across the story. She uses her knowledge to advance her career, which gives her a front row seat as plans are established to either destroy the comet or, failing that, ensure the survival of humanity.

Having now made a comfortable living in the world of television shows for the past few decades, there was a time when director Mimi Leder was arguably primed to be one of the few female directors entrusted with delivering big-budget blockbuster entertainment. She helmed the first film to be distributed by DreamWorks Pictures (The Peacemaker, which I don't recall being lauded as a great success), and was then in charge of this, a film simply overshadowed by something with a similar premise and less concern for filling the runtime with too much personal drama and weighty considerations about the endurance of the human race. Leder handles everything well enough, but she's hampered by the screenplay (from Bruce Joel Rubin and Michael Tolkin) and lack of proper star power.

Rubin and Tolkin really want to balance the big stakes with smaller personal moments here, and the film starts to drag every time we have to return to watching Leoni's character deal with her divorced mother (Vanessa Redgrave) and father (Maximillian Schell). None of it feels that important, considering the looming threat, but it has to be viewed that way because that's what we're told, right up until a horribly dissatisfying final scene for two of those characters.

As much as I like Leoni, she's not a good fit for a main role in this kind of fare. Especially when her character has to be emotionally and physically buffeted by converging events happening around her. Freeman is a much better fit for his role, a trustworthy and good-hearted POTUS, and young Wood brings a good bit of energy to his scenes, often sharing them with a young Leelee Sobieski, but often interacting with Richard Schiff, Betsy Brantley, Gary Werntz, and Denise Crosby. There's some excitement when we're spending time with the space shuttle crew (headed up by Robert Duvall) hoping to destroy the comet, but even that is weakened by the presence of Ron Eldard being one of the worst cast members inevitably given more focus than some of the others (Blair Underwood, Mary McCormack, and Jon Favreau among them). Others to look out for are Kurtwood Smith (working down on the ground for NASA), Laura Innes (a White House correspondent displeased when her colleague usurps her), Dougray Scott (a cameraman), Charles Martin Smith, Mike O'Malley, and James Cromwell.

What's here is generally well done, even if it cannot overcome the weaknesses in the material and some of the casting, but it never feels like a fun time to spend two hours. There's some spectacle, and it may make you think about how you would want to spend your last moments if you knew the world was going to end, but most people, myself included, would much rather stick on a film that has some Aerosmith on the soundtrack and Steve Buscemi going a bit stir crazy in space.

6/10

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Dante's Peak (1997)

While Dante's Peak may be a film remembered more fondly than Volcano nowadays, it's worth noting that it was . . . also viewed a bit more fondly by many people back in 1997, the year or the competing volcano blockbusters. It also made more money in cinemas. Basically, Dante's Peak was to Volcano what Armageddon was to Deep Impact (although I would argue that the latter at least had some critics praising it for the more serious approach to the material).

Pierce Brosnan is Harry Dalton, the volcanologist who ends up in the small town of Dante's Peak. Linda Hamilton is Rachel Wando, the mayor, and also mother to a boy and a girl (played by Jeremy Foley and Jamie Renée Smith, respectively). It seems clear to Harry that something bad is going to happen in Dante's Peak very soon, but he struggled to get others to agree with him. To paraphrase another, much better, film: "You say tectonic plate disturbance and people go huh, what, but you yell volcanic eruption and you've got a panic on your hands on the fourth of July."

Written by Leslie Bohem, this is very standard disaster movie stuff. Our hero is shown in an opening sequence being devastated and scarred by a big event that viewers will know is due to recur before the end credits roll, the supporting characters are often given just enough screentime to make their potential demise at least slightly saddening, and everything is set up to allow some impressive special effects to dominate most of the third act.

I was going to say that it's not the most typical film from director Roger Donaldson, but a brief reminder of his filmography has shown me that there is no typical film from him. He's happily jumped around various genres throughout his career, and Dante's Peak shows him very comfortable to lean into the expected tropes of this particular sub-genre, helped by two leads who are happy to coast by on their charm and chemistry until they have to take a back seat to the VFX.

Despite his Bond schedule, Brosnan did well to deliver a decent selection of memorable star turns throughout the latter half of the 1990s, and this is right up there with the best of them. It's nowhere near his best film, nor is it near his best acting, but he holds your attention well as both Bohem and Donaldson try their best to build tension before allowing their volcano to erupt. Hamilton works brilliantly with her leading man, and she's able to portray her mayor character as someone who is also a busy single mother without it all seeming too patronising and cringe-inducing. Smith and Foley have to be tolerable until they're put in peril, which they do, and enjoyable turns come from Elizabeth Hoffman, Charles Hallahan, Grant Heslov, and Peter Jason, among others.

There are better disaster movies, if that's what you're in the mood for, but I cannot think of any better volcano movies. We might get something superior further down the line, but for now . . . this is the best you can hope for. It's silly, it's predictable, I doubt much of the movie science holds up under scrutiny, but it's enjoyably cheesy blockbuster entertainment.

6/10

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Netflix And Chill: Thrash (2026)

If you saw, and enjoyed, Crawl then you're likely to enjoy Thrash, which is almost the exact same movie, but with sharks in place of alligators. A town is flooded, which is the first big piece of the disaster movie puzzle. Then large predators move into the streets that shouldn't be there. They're bull sharks, for the most part, but there's also something even bigger roaming around.

Written and directed by Tommy Wirkola, Thrash seems to have a sense of fun as it throws together a variety of characters in an increasingly perilous situation. You get the flood. There's a young woman with agoraphobia (Dakota, played by Whitney Peak) who ends up trapped in her house. There's a pregnant woman (Lisa, played by Phoebe Dynevor) who ends up trapped in her car. There are also three foster siblings (played by Alyla Browne, Stacy Clausen, and Dante Ubaldi) who might end up benefiting from the horrible situation. A marine researcher (Djimon Hounsou) is on his way to help, and he happens to be the uncle of Dakota. There are other people onscreen who may as well be labelled "chum". Oh, and there's a huge tanker full of blood and meat that ends up being broken up, releasing the contents into the water. Because of course there is.

While I wouldn't rush to call this a good movie, the acting isn't great and the plotting is frankly ridiculous, this is pretty much exactly what you expect it to be. Once the first fins appear, Wirkola doesn't skimp on the shark action, keeping them close enough to the main characters to be a constant threat, and also delivering the occasional moment of gory fun. The CGI is generally good, certainly more consistent than the acting performances, and a few scenes stand out for highlighting the strangeness of watching a shark move through a flooded house environment.

It could all have been much better though. More characters scattered throughout could have allowed for even more blood and guts, some more inventiveness would have been welcome, and the enjoyable ridiculousness of the final act could have somehow been weighted a bit more towards the enjoyable than the ridiculous. 

Hounsou is the best of the onscreen performers, and the film does well to cut back to his story strand often enough as he tries to make his way to Shark City, and Dynevor does her best with a character defined by the looming birth that we all know is now destined to be a water birth. Browne, Clausen, and Ubaldi become easier to tolerate after their first scenes, thanks to the fact that we're shown how mean their foster parents (played by Matt Nable and Amy Matthews) are. It's a real shame that Peak is so bad, considering she feels like a contender for the lead if her performance had been stronger. Everyone plays second fiddle to the sharks, but she's not noticeably worse than everyone else onscreen.

I had fun with this, despite all of the flaws, but it had potential to be much better than it was. Maybe they'll make some smarter choices if they ever decide to make a sequel. 

6/10

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Netflix And Chill: The Day After Tomorrow (2004)

While it is a silly and entertaining blockbuster, The Day After Tomorrow also does a good job of showing idiots why global warming is still a major problem, even if it feels like our weather is generally getting colder and wetter. Climate change deniers like to point to bad weather as an argument against global warming. It is, in fact, actually a strong indicator of the way things are headed.

Things get very bad for us humans as the weather gets a lot worse and temperatures plummet. This is an exaggerated scenario, of course, but it’s all done to show humans trying to overcome overwhelming odds to survive a snap ice age. Dennis Quaid is the scientists who has been warning about this kind of thing happening for a long time, and Jake Gyllenhaal is his son, stuck in New York City with a mixed group of people all trying to stay warm and stay alive. There is some very bad weather, there is a need for penicillin, and there are some escaped zoo animals adding to their problems.

Few people, if any, have enjoyed destroying our world as much as Roland Emmerich. He used to be content with aliens and monsters, but has now used the environment numerous times to create tales of humans struggling to survive in increasingly inhospitable conditions. Having co-written this screenplay with Jeffrey Nachmanoff, Emmerich delivers a fantastic mix of spectacle and human interest. It's cheesy, it's ridiculous, it's increasingly unbelievable as we head to the big ending, but it's damn entertaining.

The special effects, mostly created using CGI, hold up surprisingly well, even the wandering and vicious wolves that I used to point to as the weakest part of the film. If there's one thing that Emmerich is good at then it's creating at least one unforgettable movie moment/image, and this film has more than one. Whether it's a tidal wave looking to flood a major city, a major bit of tornado damage, or the Statue Of Liberty covered in snow and ice, The Day After Tomorrow fills out the 124-minute runtime with one great movie moment after another. 

Quaid and Gyllenhaal are both very good as they take turns carrying the film on their shoulders. Both actors have an innate appeal, and both give performances that never seem to be winking or implying that they are "slumming it". There's also some decent support from Emmy Rossum (who ends up in need of that penicillin), Austin Nichols, Dash Mihok, and Jay O. Sanders, even if you suspect that not everyone is going to make it to the end credits. Elsewhere, familiar faces like Sela Ward, Adrian Lester Sasha Roiz, Kenneth Welsh, and Ian Holm (a real highlight here) do their bit to sell the unfolding apocalyptic scenario.

You will see many people dismissing this as a spectacle movie that hasn't aged too well, but I would strongly disagree. I think it is, quite frankly, a brilliant blockbuster that takes the standard Emmerich template (small set-pieces interspersed with character moments on the way to more and more spectacular destruction) and applies it to numerous weather anomalies that are as well-utilised as they are well-realised. Maybe not as good as the director's high point, Independence Day, but it's only a step or two behind it, in my opinion.

9/10

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Moonfall (2022)

Despite strong competition from a couple of other blockbusters from the past decade or so, including at least one other film also from director Roland Emmerich, Moonfall is the dumbest mainstream release you will see this year, and perhaps even the dumbest mainstream movie you will ever see. It is so dumb that it at least makes it easier to forget about following the plot and just concentrate on the spectacle of the whole thing. In fact, I think it might be dangerous to try keeping your brain fully switched on while watching this.

Basically, in the way of almost all Emmerich movies, something happens at the start that teases the mass devastation due to come along later in the movie. The very basic premise is, as the title tells you, the moon changing orbit. Earth has about three weeks to figure out a solution. The only hope for humanity lies with Jocinda Fowler (a top bod at NASA, played by Halle Berry), Brian Harper (a disgraced ex-astronaut, played by Patrick Wilson), and KC Houseman (an amateur . . . skywatcher, a label I will use to avoid spoilers, played by John Bradley). Meanwhile, tsunamis start destroying major cities, gravity is changing, and people seem remarkably unconcerned about the threat of super-werewolves.

Co-written by Emmerich, Harald Kloser, and Spenser Cohen, here is a film that almost gets things so right, but ultimately ruins the third act with an overdose of CGI madness that makes it genuinely hard to see, or even know, what is going on. The fun ideas set up in the opening act become less fun as things met become more relentless. And there are only so many times you can look at a supermoon in the sky before it becomes worthy of little more than a shrug (once, one time is all you need).

Emmerich can direct this kind of stuff in his sleep, but he seems to get very easily distracted by the toys at his disposal. He is a man who doesn’t believe in “less is more”. More is more, and more on top of that, and even more. It’s tiring, especially by the time you get to a final act that manages to be overlong and surprisingly unsatisfying.

The cast do what is asked of them, and their performances are in line with the material. Berry comes out of it best, having to be the level-headed lead of the mission, and Wilson tries hard, despite being weighed down by the many clichés that he’s given (washed up, no money, a beer in the morning, a son he hasn’t always been as close to). Bradley is a mixture of comic relief and Mr. Exposition, he does well enough in his role, but his character is an odd one to turn into a hero, for obvious reasons. Charlie Plummer plays the son of Wilson’s character, Michael Peña is the stepfather you suspect may end up moonstruck to pave the way for a reconnection between Wilson and Carolina Bartczak (as his ex-wife), and Wenwen Yu is absolutely wasted in a role that feels horribly undefined.

If you need something that will provide spectacle without taxing your brain then this might just fit the bill. Personally, I would recommend (re)watching past glories, pick from either the fantastic The Day After Tomorrow or the silliness of 2012. Pick Independence Day (not exactly the same kind of movie, but the template is similar enough). This isn’t as good as any of those. But it still isn’t as bad as Geostorm.

5/10

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Bonus Review: Into The Storm (2014)

Even dumber than you probably expect it to be, Into The Storm is, funnily enough, a weather-related disaster movie, with the extra gimmick of many scenes presented in the style of real footage captured by those in the middle of events.

Pete (Matt Walsh) is a storm chaser. He's got a team working with him (including a meteorologist, played by Sarah Wayne Callies), a vehicle that can withstand MAJOR winds, and the willingness to endanger everyone around him for the sake of some great footage. Unfortunately, he's not been getting close to any storms. That all changes when a number of tornadoes spring up, causing a lot of damage and signalling some even worse weather heading their way. Oh, and there also happens to be a graduation ceremony at a local high school, meaning that a lot of teenagers could also find themselves in peril.

Taking a formulaic plot structure, Into The Storm has occasional moments of spectacle to make it worth a watch, but very little else to recommend it. The direction from Steven Quale is pedestrian, at best, and the script by John Swetnam is ridiculously underdone, even for this kind of stuff. One or two characters stand out, but they're not necessarily the ones that you're rooting for. And as for the schoolkids, just forget it. Even the two or three that are given the chance to be the focus of the movie for a number of scenes are eminently forgettable.

Nathan Kress and Max Deacon are the two young actors stuck with characters that the audience won't really care for, Alycia Debnam Carey is the young actress also stuck with someone that nobody will really care about, and Richard Armitage plays a Vice Principal who also happens to be the father of the two boys. Yes, you guessed it, it's hard to care about him either. Callies does better in her role, but even she plays a character that it's hard to care too much about. It's not her fault, it's just an automatic reaction to a script that goes for the most obvious tricks in a heavy-handed manner, causing some (well, me, at the very least) to dislike the characters as they should be warming to them. Prime example - the scene with her talking on the phone to her daughter. The young daughter that misses her lots. See, you can't possibly want her to be endangered by freak meteorological events because SHE HAS A YOUNG DAUGHTER. If that doesn't make you care more for her then you're a heartless bastard, I guess. That's what people call me anyway. Walsh is the most fun, but as he's playing a bit of a selfish ass it's also difficult to care too much about his fate, particularly when so much of the third act is highlighted, underscored and covered in neon lighting during the first act of the movie. Mind you, at least that obvious foreshadowing is fun. I'll give 'em that.

There are some great special effects on display here, and viewers should be kept relatively entertained if they view the film as nothing more than a chance to see how well a computer can create tornadoes onscreen (which was obviously the whole raison d'être of the thing anyway). Given the choice, however, I would rush to rewatch The Day After Tomorrow instead. Heck, I'd probably put up with 2012 over this.

5/10

http://www.amazon.com/Storm-Blu-ray-Digital-UltraViolet-Combo/dp/B00MJANW40/ref=sr_1_2?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1415977337&sr=1-2&keywords=into+the+storm

Blast Vegas AKA Destruction: Las Vegas (2013)

Or, the alternative title that I gave it, Malcolm In The Maelstrom.

Sometimes I already know, just from the title and the stars, that I'm going to love a film. It usually happens with films that turn out to be genuinely great movies, but it also happens with films that make me laugh from start to finish because of how inept they are.

Blast Vegas falls into the latter category. It's horrible. It's full of characters that you will struggle to care about. The special effects are pretty dire. Yet I loved it (never fear, my rating reflects the reality, as opposed to the fun I had, pointing and laughing at everything).

Frankie Muniz (oh dear, oh dear, how did he slide so far so quickly?) stars as Nelson, a young man on holiday in Las Vegas with a bunch of guys who will put up with him just because he can be their designated driver. Those same guys take some Egyptian relic and fool around with it for a while, bringing about some REALLY bad weather and the beginning of the end of Las Vegas. Nelson, amidst the chaos and carnage, wants to find a girl that he's taken a shine to (Olive, played by Maggie Castle) and is helped along the way by a club singer named Sal (Barry Bostwick).

I had fun with Blast Vegas, I can't deny it, but I'd only ever recommend it to someone who could approach the film in the same way that I did, ready to point and laugh at the thing and then never want to watch it ever again. The screenplay, by Joe D'Ambrosia and Tom Teves, is suitably silly. Nobody is going to watch this and expect to hear any memorable dialogue, but it's good to watch the events unfold, with the script embracing the ludicrous premise as an excuse to get some easy laughs (yes, there's an Elvis or two in the mix).

Director Jack Perez is, of course, also responsible for promoting the fun factor of the movie, helped no end by Barry Bostwick, who seems to enjoy himself immensely in his cliched, comedic role. Muniz and Castle are appealing leads, while Michael Steger, Andrew Lawrence, Summer Bishil, Jillian Nelson and some other people should all be remembered for . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ummmm . . . . . . . . . . . . . . also taking part in the proceedings. Okay, none of the supporting cast members really stand out, but they do what's asked of them. I think.

If it sounds like I had LOTS of fun with this movie, people may be wondering why I still rate it so low. Well, none of the fun really makes up for the ridiculousness that fills almost every scene, whether it's an opening sequence that features a cameo by John Landis for no apparent reason, some typically dubious special effects, or even the same stretch of road being used - albeit shot from different angles - when people need to try driving through the extreme weather. And, for anyone else who manages to watch the entire movie, if you can explain to me why people keep running in front of the ONE VEHICLE on an otherwise empty street, while a deadly storm keeps raging on, then please send answers on a postcard. Or, y'know, just post a reply below.

I've seen much worse than Blast Vegas, but that's mainly because I watch a lot of terrible, terrible movies.

3/10

http://www.amazon.com/Blast-Vegas-Frankie-Muniz/dp/B00HRD0FHQ/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1389654599&sr=8-1&keywords=blast+vegas

Snowmageddon (2011)

What a ridiculous title. What a ridiculous premise. What a ridiculous movie. All of these things are true, but it's also true that Snowmageddon is surprisingly entertaining. Yes, I'm putting that opinion out there right away. Snowmageddon suffers from a budget that can't match what it tries to show onscreen, but it manages to remain fun from beginning to end.

Let me get the plot out of the way quickly before you start laughing too hard. A family hear a knock at the door and find a gift left there. Nobody is around, just the box. Inside the box is a snowglobe. It's not just any snowglobe, however, this is a magical snowglobe. Whenever it is allowed to run it causes a disaster in the surrounding area. Of course, this isn't a conclusion that the characters immediately reach, but it's not long until the strange truth becomes apparent to young Rudy (Dylan Matzke). It then becomes a race against time to figure out how to stop the snowglobe from causing further destruction.

Laura Harris and David Cubitt are the parents who end up battling some extreme weather while trying to protect their loved ones and find a way to safely resolve things, Matzke is their young son, and Magda Apanowicz plays their daughter. Jeffrey Ballard plays a snowboarder who is also caught up in the midst of this bad situation. While nobody onscreen is great, it has to be said that they all do a pretty good job, especially considering how preposterous the central premise is (although Christmas is a time for magic, be it light or dark).

The script by Rudy Thauberger is in line with other low-budget disaster movies, which means that it's pretty weak. But, like the acting, it's a bit better than other work within the same range. Director Sheldon Wilson keeps things moving along nicely enough, and uses the varied CGI in a way that lets him visualise every idea in the script without highlighting all of its flaws for too long. That may not sound like much, and there's still enough on show to point and laugh at, but there's enough restraint shown, and just enough small character moments, to keep the film consistently watchable.

I'm sure that, as is often the case, many people will roll their eyes and just laugh at my opinion here. I liked Snowmageddon. I almost liked it a lot. Believe me, I'm just as surprised as you are by that statement. But I'll stand by it.

6/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Snowmageddon-DVD-David-Cubitt/dp/B00A9YBWAO/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1386711453&sr=8-1&keywords=snowmageddon

Aftershock (2012)

Directed by Nicolas Lopez, Aftershock is yet another movie that many people will most readily associate with Eli Roth. Why? Well, he produced the movie, helped write the screenplay (with Lopez and Guillermo Amoedo) and also takes on one of the lead roles. Roth is great at engaging with fans and publicising movies that he's involved with, but the downside is that everyone just thinks of them as "Eli Roth movies" - if you think I am talking nonsense then just ask a random selection of a dozen people who directed The Last Exorcism. See?

But I digress.

Roth plays a character only known as Gringo, a young man who is enjoying some time in Chile with a couple of friends/acquaintances (Ariel Levy and Nicolas Martinez) when the memorable partying is rudely interrupted by an even more memorable earthquake. The earthquake causes no small amount of damage and death, but the survivors soon realise that the dark side of mother nature can be matched by the dark side of human nature.

If you had a problem with Hostel (a movie I love, but some seem to think that it shows up Roth as a complete xenophobe) then you're really not going to like the general misanthropy on display here. As well as showing a situation in Chile that goes downhil fast this just casts everyone as dangerous, selfish pieces of crap who often don't take much to be pushed into committing terrible crimes.

The acting is uneven, to put it nicely. Roth is okay in his role, but not great. Levy and Martinez are worse, and their characters are just so hard to sympathise with that viewers just won't care when all hell breaks loose. Andrea Osvart, Natasha Yarovenko and Lorenza Izzo are all pretty enough, but not that great at actually acting, so viewers won't care about them either.

Director Lopez at least gets the carnage and nastiness right. When that's onscreen the movie is at least entertaining. Some fine gore gags pop up here and there, and there are one or two squirm-inducing moments. If only the grue and violence had been accompanied by decent characters and a solid script then this could have been a solid, fun, horror-tinged, disaster movie. As it stands, it's a disappointment.

Oh, and avoid the trailer for this one as it commits the cardinal sin of revealing the very end of the movie. Who the hell designs trailers and thinks that showing the final moment is a good idea?????

5/10

http://www.amazon.com/Aftershock-Watch-Now-While-Theaters/dp/B00CQ3R1BA/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1368741901&sr=8-1&keywords=aftershock+eli+roth

Poseidon (2006)

A remake of a movie that remains my favourite disaster movie of all time (The Poseidon Adventure), Poseidon would seem to be a movie not really worth bothering about. How could it ever hope to top the fantastic original? Well, let's just cut to the chase here, it doesn't. It does, however, make for a decent bit of entertainment in its own right, thanks to a decent cast and solid direction from Wolfgang Petersen, who is no stranger to drama in submerged vessels (as viewers of the magnificent Das Boot will agree).

This adaptation may take place almost a quarter of a century after the original movie, but there's very little different in the overall premise. That's unsurprising, the main premise is so good that it needs no tinkering. A large and lovely cruise ship, the Poseidon, is hit by a freak wave out in the middle of the ocean and a group of people decide that their best bet for survival is to get to the bottom of the ship, which is now the part of the vessel now lying ABOVE the water. So the folk start to climb up and up on a perilous journey, doing their best to stay ahead of rising water levels, avoid explosions and fires and keep their footing as they move higher.

As you might expect, there are a number of scenes in Poseidon that are all about spectacle. Thankfully, the special effects are so well done that the moments of spectacle are really . . . . . . . . spectacular. Seriously, the visuals are consistently impressive, which is kind of a minimum requirement now for the big-budget disaster movies.

Special effects aren't everything though, as almost everyone would agree. The focus of the movie sways between the destruction of Poseidon and the perilous journey of the characters, which is why it's a good job that the various cast members all do well in their roles.

Kurt Russell and Josh Lucas are the two leaders of the group, men with different styles who have the same inner strength and strong will. Russell's character has added motivation as he also does his best to keep his daughter (Emmy Rossum) and her young fella (Mike Vogel) safe. Jacinda Barrett plays a woman whose main concern is her young son (played by Jimmy Bennett), Mia Maestro plays a stowaway and Richard Dreyfuss is the oldest member of the group. There are also small roles for Freddy Rodriguez and Andre Braugher. Oh, and Kevin Dillon goes over the top as the asshole of the group. I guess I should also warn anyone who dislikes the singing voice of Stacy "Fergie" Ferguson, they will roll their eyes as she entertains the cruise ship passengers during the opening scenes of the movie.

The script by Mark Protosevich (working from the novel by Paul Gallico, with some nods to the 1972 film) is perfectly serviceable. This kind of film has very few surprises, therefore the script isn't exactly full of great twists, turns and character reveals. It sketches out the relationships, it goes for the easy moments of emotional manipulation and it moves the survivors from one problem on to the next. For me, that makes the script just fine for a disaster movie.

Everything - script, cast, special effects - is brought together masterfully by director Petersen, who paces things perfectly and keeps the camera moving around in a way that never lets viewers forget how much worse the whole situation is getting for every minute that the ship is capsized.

I really didn't expect to enjoy Poseidon as much as I did. My love for the original movie is so great, I just didn't expect to see around that mental block. The fact that I ended up thinking about buying this as soon as the end credits started rolling is testament to what a pleasant surprise it was.

7/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Poseidon-Blu-ray-Region-Free-Russell/dp/B002U5741G/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1369089887&sr=8-2&keywords=poseidon

Titanic II (2010)

It's another cannily-titled cash-in from our friends at The Asylum and if you can't guess the movie they're hoping to emulate then perhaps you deserve to be forced into watching the thing. But, before I get carried away with easy mockery and insults, I must just say that this is far from the worst of the movies to come from The Asylum. In fact, it's actually almost good though these films always lose a few points for the cynical way that sees them being created in the first place.

The Titanic II is a ship (hence the title, this is NOT a sequel to James Cameron's Titanic) that is due to travel on the same journey as the original Titanic did exactly one hundred years previously. If you're superstitious then you may not want to get on the ship but plenty of people (desperate actors, desperate wannabe models and out-of-work service staff, by the looks of things) throw caution to the wind and grab themselves a ticket. Well, of all the unlikely and unfortunate events to occur, a huge ice shelf breaks off many miles away and sends a tsunami wave towards the ship. There are also big blocks of ice that may cause quite a bit of damage. Oh, and another wave is due to head their way that's even bigger.

Directed and written by Shane Van Dyke (son of Barry Van Dyke and grandson of Dick Van Dyke), Titanic II actually does what it sets out to do fairly well. It sets up the main characters, sketches out the leanest of backstories, throws onscreen a load of disposable victims and gets the threat developed as quickly as possible. The FX work is disappointing but also an improvement on past works from the studio.

Shane Van Dyke also takes one of the main roles and he's not too bad. Okay, nobody is too great either but I'd have to concede that the acting here is also an improvement over past efforts from The Asylum. Marie Westbrook and Michelle Glavan aren't the best actresses but are likeable enough as the destruction threatens them at every turn. Brooke Burns is also okay and Bruce Davison deserves better at this stage in his career but works well with what he's given. Everyone else overacts appropriately and gets to throw themselves around as the camera tilts and judders to simulate the effects of a ship being battered in the middle of the ocean.

If you're after something that's of proper movie quality and measured by the standards of fare that can get into the local multiplex then look elsewhere. But if you're after something that's enjoyable enough while it passes the time, laughable in places, cheap and cheerful throughout and amusingly ridiculous then you could do a lot worse than watching this film.

4/10

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