All I Want For Christmas (1991)

While it's obviously intended to be a fun, diverting bit of family entertainment with a sprinkling of magic that helps everyone keep a smile on their face while the end credits roll, All I Want For Christmas instead ends up being one of the more annoying movies to hang such a slight premise on the sagging branches of a small, tired, skinny Christmas tree.

The plot concerns two annoying children (played by Ethan Randall, better known nowadays by the name Ethan Embry, and Thora Birch) who just want their parents to get back together. The girl played by Birch, the younger of the two children, decides to ask Santa (Leslie Nielsen), but her brother knows that it's up to them to make their Christmas wish come true. And so they set a plan in motion, a plan that they hope will reunite their parents and allow them all to live happily ever after. It involves rodents, deceit and ditching their mother's new boyfriend (played by Kevin Nealon).

This is a tough one to watch, mainly because Randall and Birch are two of the most horribly smug children to appear onscreen. Birch has the excuse of being young and precocious, when this was made, but Randall just seems to go out of his way to be irritating while not doing very much at all. The fact that the movie also features the most horrendous, and slightly disturbing, rendition of "Baby, It's Cold Outside" is the icing on the cake.

Director Robert Lieberman makes no attempt to cover up the flaws in the script, by Robert Lieberman and Thom Eberhardt, and subsequently leaves everyone out to dry as the movie slogs towards a predictable, flat finale (that COULD have been enjoyable and/or moving if the leads had been slightly likable).

Leslie Nielsen has fun with his small amount of screentime, Nealon is amusingly easy to want out of the picture, and Harley Jane Kozak and Jamey Sheridan are okay as the separated parents that the kids want back together, but it's poor Lauren Bacall who suffers the greatest indignity, taking part in that aforementioned musical moment alongside Birch while being sorely underused throughout the rest of the movie. Andrea Martin doesn't do too badly, as a potential love interest named Olivia, but it's far too difficult to see why she would be attracted to Randall's smug demeanour.

Not one that I'd recommend, unless you enjoy being annoyed to the point of distraction by lead characters.

3/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/All-Want-For-Christmas-DVD/dp/B0002W10RS/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1386012124&sr=8-1&keywords=all+i+want+for+christmas

Captain Ron (1992)

If you mention the movie Captain Ron to some people, then they may grin and try to tell you that it's a fantastic film. They will be wrong, but they won't realise that. Captain Ron is one of those movies that SEEMS better when some time is passed and you're thinking about all of the different roles that Kurt Russell has played and then your brain goes "oh, don't forget that he was great in Captain Ron". Your brain will be correct to remind you that Russell was/is great in the title role, but that will then lead you to remember the entire movie with a coating of fondness that it doesn't really deserve. It's mildly amusing and it's something I'd watch again if it was on TV during a horrible, rainy afternoon, but it's nothing great.

Martin Short plays Martin Harvey, husband to Katherine Harvey (Mary Kay Place) and father to Benjamin (Benjamin Salisbury) and Caroline (Meadow Sisto). When Martin inherits a yacht he gets very excited and immediately plans a family trip. He wants them all to enjoy themselves and learn a bit about life on the ocean while someone takes charge and helps them bring it back to America to sell it. The person who comes to take charge of the boat for them is Captain Ron (Russell). Ron has one glass eye, an uncanny talent for getting lost and an easygoing, somewhat slapdash, manner that soon starts to get on Martin's nerves. Can the two men survive at sea together for the whole journey? And does Ron actually know what he's doing?

Directed by Thom E. Eberhardt, who also worked on the screenplay with John Dwyer, Captain Ron is easygoing, by-the-numbers, comedy fare. Martin Short plays the highly strung character that he's played many times before, Mary Kay Place is a supportive wife and the Salisbury and Sisto are kids who change during the course of their trip, for better or worse. People fall overboard, some DIY goes horribly wrong, there's an embarrassment that befalls the married couple when they try to have some quality time on their own, etc. etc. etc.

The big plus point in the movie is Russell in the role of the captain. There are times when the character could become annoying and unsympathetic, but Russell plays him with such a laid-back, kindly demeanour that even as he's making mistake after mistake it's hard to think unkindly of him. As Martin Short's character starts to lose his patience with Ron, viewers end up warming to him even more and that warmth stays throughout until a final third in which some danger is added and characters need to show what they're really made of.

Undemanding fun, lifted up to the top of the rigging by Russell.

6/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Captain-Ron-DVD-Kurt-Russell/dp/B0001IMC9S/ref=sr_1_1?s=dvd&ie=UTF8&qid=1362364373&sr=1-1

Sole Survivor (1983)

A movie that I'd seen mentioned numerous times over the years, Sole Survivor is a film that many people love and point to as a forerunner to the likes of Final Destination and the films of M. Night Shyamalan. While I can see the connections I also think that the quality and influence of this movie has been somewhat overstated as the rose-tinted glasses of nostalgia obscure the movie itself. I may, of course, just be missing out on something that everyone else sees. It happens occasionally.

Anyway, the movie is centred around the following premise: Denise Watson (Anita Skinner) is a very lucky woman, the only survivor of a major airplane crash. The doctor who has spent a long time helping her to recuperate, Brian Richardson (Kurt Johnson), explains the difficulties that she still has ahead as she attempts to head home and resume a normal life. A lot of survivors wonder just how worthwhile their lives are, many go on to die or commit suicide within the next year or two. Denise is, understandably, fragile and her mindset isn't helped by a kooky actress, Karla Davis (Caren Larkey), who seems to think that something is amiss. Denise also starts to see people around her, silent and sinister, and begins to suspect that they're not normal, living human beings.

Yes, from the above paragraph you may immediately be thinking "aahhhh, those connections mentioned are obvious now" but that would be a misrepresentation of this film. There are one or two strange incidents that almost cause Denise mortal danger (a la Final Destination) but as the story develops things are shown to have a more physical, yet sinister and supernatural, explanation. People are mystified as Denise grows more afraid throughout the film but there's no invisible Grim Reaper after anyone. The fact that people die, or are scheduled to die, ties in with a theory explained within the movie and makes for an enjoyably spooky chain of events leading up to an absolutely fantastic punchline.

Sadly, while the pieces of the puzzle are sliding together, nothing especially noteworthy happens for the first hour of the movie. The crash itself isn't shown, a number of tense moments end up deflating rather than reaching any entertaining peak, and the behaviour of most of the characters onscreen ends up being quite irritating while viewers get impatient for more than just random scare attempts.

Anita Skinner does okay in the title role, Kurt Johnson is the typical male co-star who doesn't believe anything strange is happening until he's sparked into action towards the big finale and Caren Larkey does her best while stuck portraying one of the more irritating characters. Robin Davidson, as young neighbour Kristy Cutler, lights up the screen with her presence and genre fans will enjoy seeing a young Brinke Stevens already at ease with some onscreen nudity.

Writer-director Thom Eberhardt (who would provide something much better with his next movie, Night Of The Comet) certainly puts a few decent ideas into this mix, and the film is just as heavily influenced by some greats from the past as it is allegedly influential upon more modern outings, but he mires those elements into something with sluggish pacing and nothing visually exciting to help en route to the, admittedly spooky, ending. I thought it was still worth a watch. Once.

5/10.

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