Hypnotic (2023)

It doesn’t matter how many times you get to the cinema this year, I doubt you will see a dumber film than Hypnotic. It’s so consistently ridiculous that it sits on the same level as some of the classic stinkers of cinema, and may well go on to become a bit of a cult classic in time.

The plot all begins with cop Danny Rourke (Ben Affleck) talking to a therapist about the day his daughter was snatched away from him. It was a typical day at the park, he let his mind wander for just a moment, and that one lapse has gone on to define his entire character. After his therapy session is over, Rourke is almost immediately sent to check out a potential bank robbery. That’s where he first encounters Dellrayne (William Fichtner), a man who can get people to see and do whatever he plants in their mind. While trying to figure out exactly how he works his magic, Rourke heads along to see Diana Cruz (Alice Braga), a woman who knows all about the power of people like Dellrayne. Rourke needs to stop the guy, but he also suspects that he knows something about the disappearance of his daughter. It is going to be a lot harder to crack this case, however, while Rourke is unable to trust his own senses.

Director Robert Rodriguez isn’t a stranger to messy movies, to put it kindly, but his worst moments have always, up until now, been reserved for the kind of ridiculous kid films that we’re never exactly aimed at cinephiles anyway. Hypnotic feels different. It feels, despite the silliness, as if it is aimed at adult viewers, but it also feels very much like Rodriguez had an idea (he also co-wrote the script with Max Borenstein) and wouldn’t let anyone dissuade him from crafting an entire movie around that idea. And getting Affleck for the main role just goes to show how poor Affleck is at choosing star vehicles for himself.

While I could offer up a selection of lines from the script that would make even the most stone-faced reader laugh out loud, that seems a bit too easy. Especially when the cast do so little to help. Affleck plays his cop in the style of Topper Harley, Braga is disappointingly flat while delivering almost every bit of exposition required, and Fichtner isn’t allowed to just cut loose and have more fun with his bad guy. He should be the absolute highlight of the film, especially when you think of the ridiculous power he has, but he somehow feels like nothing more than a canny henchman. JD Pardo, Dayo Okeniyi, Jackie Earle Haley, and Jeff Fahey also appear, although the latter two only have a mere minute or two of screentime, which helps to spare them too much embarrassment.

There’s one decent set-piece, known to anyone who saw the trailer, but nothing else here. The score is uninteresting, the special effects are okay, at times, but will probably just make you wish you rewatched Inception instead, and the whole thing lacks tension, as well as lacking anyone to really care about.

It IS mesmerising, in a way, but it’s mesmerisingly awful. And shame on Rodriguez for calling back to a joke delivered in the far superior Desperado.

3/10

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Alita: Battle Angel (2019)

Hey, I am as surprised as you might be to be saying this, but maybe more people should check out Alita: Battle Angel. It's not necessarily going to become your new favourite movie, it's certainly not going to placate you if you've been spending some time recently seeking out quality cinema with great actors delivering ear-tickling dialogue, but it's a fantastic bit of escapist fun, set in a world full of cool little details and wonderful production design.

The film starts off with Christoph Waltz, playing a Dr. Dyson Ido (and his surgical work now involves a lot of engineering or robotic parts), finding a discarded cyborg body that he then rebuilds and reactivates. The cyborg is Alita (Rosa Salazar), a young woman who strives to remember her past, and who ends up having a number of much bigger cyborgs tasked with ending her life.

Based on a manga (Gunnm AKA Battle Angel Alita) by Yukito Kishiro, Alita: Battle Angel comes to the screen courtesy of a screenplay by James Cameron and Laeta Kalogridis and direction from Robert Rodriguez. As ridiculous as it may seem, considering some of their achievements throughout their careers, none of these names are the draw they once were. People tend to actively mistrust Cameron nowadays, with good reason, considering how many times he has done his bit to sell us on Terminator sequels of ever-diminishing quality. Everyone is on good form here though, and it's refreshing to see Rodriguez back at the helm of something that is looking forward rather than trying to emulate the past (he does the latter well, but it's a well he's gone back to a few too many times throughout his career).

The cast help to sell everything, especially Salazar in a role that transforms her into the wide-eyed central character and Waltz as the fallible human who kicks things off. Jennifer Connelly and Mahershala Ali are enjoyable as the people who are manipulating events to direct Alita towards dangerous confrontations, Keean Johnson is the pretty male/potential love interest, and a couple of the main mean cyborgs are played entertainingly enough by Ed Skrein and Jackie Earle Haley.

But don't go thinking I am praising this as a near-perfect cinematic experience. While it delivers on the eye candy, and it really does (I was relieved to see that Rodriguez could still do well with action scenes), it's also full of good quality cheese. The script is silly and clunky, especially in the few moments in which it tries to have characters showing some real emotions. It's easy to forgive, however, as we're taken from one gorgeous sequence to the next (whether it's just a crowded street scene or a violent sporting tournament).

I'm not sure if we'll ever get any other instalments after this one, it didn't seem to do as well as expected at the box office, but I do know that I'll try to catch them on the big screen if we do. For sci-fi action blockbusters that enjoy pretending they have some depth to them, this is one of the better examples we've had in recent years.

7/10

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Noir November: Sin City: A Dame To Kill For (2014)

When Sin City came on the scene almost a decade ago, it was unlike pretty much any other slice of cool that mainstream audiences had ever scene. Hard boiled doesn't even begin to cover it. Those visuals, those archetypes, and that cool dialogue all just clicked together into a great celebration of everything noir.

It's a shame that Sin City: A Dame To Kill For feels tired from almost the first scene. Reprising the same stylistic choices from the first movie - largely black and white, but with splashes of colour popping out here and there - makes it feel like little more than a complete rehash, with less interesting characters for us to hang out with.

The tales to be told this time around had the potential to be just as entertaining as the tales that made up the first movie. Eva Green is the woman of the title, and she's pretty much a perfect choice for such a femme fatale. She gets one tough guy (Josh Brolin) in her grasp, but he in turn enlists help from another tough guy (Mickey Rourke, reprising the role of Marv). The badass girls of the street also return (led, once again, by Rosario Dawson), and Dennis Haysbert takes over the role, Manute, that was previously played by the hulking Michael Clarke Duncan. Joseph Gordon-Levitt plays a lucky gambler who is out for revenge. And lots of people rub each other up the wrong way.

Archetypes. That's all we have here, yet again, but they're just not as much fun this time around. For every moment of Eva Green being ridiculously sexy and callous, we end up having to endure a scene in which Jessica Alba tries to act drunk and tough and angry (hint = she can't). Gordon-Levitt and Brolin are great additions to the cast, but the film doesn't do well enough by their characters to make their tales as satisfying as they should be.

I'm assuming that most of what's here onscreen is hewn as closely to the source material, by Frank Miller, as it was in the first movie. In fact, Miller gets a co-directing and co-writing credit alongside Robert Rodriguez. Perhaps such slavish devotion to the material only works when it's cinematically strong? Or perhaps it was inevitable that the strongest tales were picked for the first movie, leaving any sequel to feel like second-tier stuff. A disappointing, disjointed air also doesn't help, with the stories never feeling that tightly intertwined, but there are still enough individual moments to make it worth your time. Just.

The visuals are as gorgeous as ever, if you go with the stylistic choices, and there's also plenty of fun to be had in the sprawling support cast, which includes the likes of Bruce Willis, Juno Temple, Ray Liotta, Stacy Keach, Jeremy Piven, Jaime King, Christopher Meloni, and even Lady Gaga.

Liked the first movie? You should find enough to enjoy here. It's just a shame that it never hits the heights of its predecessor.

6/10

http://www.amazon.com/Frank-Millers-Sin-City-Blu-ray/dp/B00N201WPM/ref=sr_1_1?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1415057588&sr=1-1&keywords=sin+city+a+dame+to+kill+for

Sin City (2005)

Cool, stylish, almost perfectly cast, and with many frames that look ripped straight from the pages of Frank Miller's original work, it's hard not to consider Sin City as one of the best comic-book movies of all time.

Director Robert Rodriguez, helped by Quentin Tarantino, also wrote the screenplay, and sets out from the very beginning to immerse viewers in a stark, black and white world of anti-heroes and villains. There are splashes of colour here and there, depicting bloodshed, strong feelings, or even just a nice pair of eyes. One other bonus, this was one of the last few films made to star Bruce Willis before he decided to sleepwalk into every paycheck.

There are little extra bits interspersed throughout, but the move iss mainly made up of three tales. In one, Bruce Willis plays an old cop who wants to get his man (Nick Stahl) at any cost. His perp is a sicko, but he's a sicko with a rich, influential father (Powers Boothe). In the second tale we get to meet Marv (Mickey Rourke), a big, brute of a man moves to action when he's set up for a murder he didn't commit. The murder of a woman that he felt great affection for. Clive Owen clashes with Benicio Del Toro in the third tale, leading to a situation that could cause a lot of trouble for the deadly working girls of Sin City. And then it's back to that dogged cop, many years later but no less determined.

As well as those mentioned, Sin City also features Josh Hartnett, Jaime King, Michael Clarke Duncan, Rutger Hauer, Elijah Wood, Rosario Dawson, Brittany Murphy, Jessica Alba, Carla Gugino, Alexis Bledel, Michael Madsen, Devon Aoki, and many more. It's certainly a star-studded cast but, more than that, everyone feels perfect for the role given to them.

Featuring his usual cool soundtrack accompanying the visuals, this manages to feel both like a great Frank Miller film and also a great Rodriguez joint. It's almost a perfect marriage of material and director.

Unfortunately, it doesn't hold up quite as well on repeat viewings. It's still very enjoyable, and consistently gorgeous to look at (seriously, freeze frame it at almost any moment and you get a gorgeous comic panel), but the pacing could have been tightened up slightly to bring the movie in under two hours, with the Owen/Del Toro section of the movie dragging things down badly.

For those who like their movies steeped in traditional aspects of cinema, this is a love or hate film. Shot almost entirely on green screen, with only a few real sets utilised, it's a unique experience, but one that absolutely works, in my opinion, due to the nature of the material.

If you want nuance and realism then feel free to reach for a thousand other movies before this one. But if you want something cool, visually stunning, and with moments of painful ultra-violence, then this might just be the ticket.

8/10

http://www.amazon.com/Sin-City-Blu-ray-Powers-Boothe/dp/B00FAHYNYC/ref=sr_1_1?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1408780621&sr=1-1&keywords=sin+city

And UK folks, don't forget to check out a double-bill at the cinema this weekend, while a lot of venues are showing this and Sin City: A Dame To Kill For. Such tickets can be found at sites like this one - http://www.picturehouses.co.uk/cinema/Cameo_Picturehouse/News/item/Sin_City_Sin_City_A_Dame_To_Kill_For/

Side By Side (2012)

A documentary that looks at the current choice being made by film-makers to either shoot traditionally or move towards digital, Side By Side contains some nice pieces of information, but is mostly a chance to hear a variety of directors talk about their approaches to film-making and their passion for whichever format they choose.

Keanu Reeves is the constant element here, conducting interviews with directors and people who work in other areas of the film business. The list of names includes, but isn't limited to, Martin Scorsese, James Cameron, David Fincher, Danny Boyle, Steven Soderbergh, Robert Rodriguez, George Lucas, David Lynch, Christopher Nolan, Greta Gerwig and Joel Schumacher.

Directed by Christopher Kenneally, who also wrote the linking narration, this isn't a documentary to win anyone over, and it's not full of surprises. If you like the feel and look of actual FILM then you'll feel that you've been proven right in your choice as the end credits roll. But so will anyone who likes the options provided by filming digitally. And if you can't already guess what side of the fence James Cameron and George Lucas fall on then you've never seen a James Cameron or George Lucas film lately. The two men end up being two of the duller subjects interviewed, funnily enough, with Lucas being almost laughable in his passion to convert everyone to the world of digital.

The greater fun here comes from people either putting up a great variety of reasons for their choices, with Rodriguez being just as passionate about digital as Cameron or Lucas but putting forward his argument in a much more practical manner, or from listening to people who can state their own personal preference while also looking at the bigger picture and the pros and cons of each method.

A film for film lovers (on any format), Side By Side is a pleasant, civilised debate that serves to remind people of just how much blood, sweat and tears went into creating the movies that are now beloved classics. When remembering all of those movie memories, the main argument becomes a lot less significant, but no less interesting. Well, that's how I felt as I smiled throughout the whole thing.

7/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Side-By-DVD-Keanu-Reeves/dp/B00B74R3CQ/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1390658737&sr=8-1&keywords=side+by+side

The Faculty (1998)

Robert Rodriguez hasn't made many bad movies. I won't be silly enough to say that he hasn't made ANY bad movies, despite the fact that I have somehow avoided the ones that people consider real stinkers (*cough* The Adventures Of Sharkboy And Lavagirl *cough*), but he's got a pretty good hit rate, in my opinion. Thankfully, The Faculty is one of his many good movies.

It's a teen sci-fi horror written by Kevin Williamson AKA Kevin "Scream" Williamson that also happens to feature one of the best casts assembled for such material. And Usher.

Herrington High is a typical American school, but things are changing. When Casey Connor (Elijah Wood ) isn't being picked up by bullies, and having his legs splayed to allow them to smash his crotch into the flagpole, he's observing life around him. Some things are strange, like star football player Stan (Shawn Hatosy) deciding that he wants to concentrate on academic pursuits as opposed to sports, some things are just nice to observe, like Delilah Profitt (Jordana Brewster), and some things are strange lifeforms found on the school grounds that could indicate a potential takeover by alien life forms. Yeah, that last thing leads to Casey teaming up with Stan, Delilah and some other students as they realise that their school may be ground zero for an alien invasion. High school may not seem to be a standard battlefield for an alien invasion, but as Casey says: "If you were going to take over the world, would you blow up the White House 'Independence Day' style, or sneak in through the back door?"

What I like to do sometimes, as people may have noticed, is reel off a cast list when I think that it speaks for itself. Read the following list and try to argue that it's not one of the best blends of old hands and new talent thrown together for a sci-fi horror movie. I've already mentioned Wood, Hatosy and Brewster, but there's also Clea DuVall, Laura Harris, Josh Hartnett, Piper Laurie, Bebe Neuwirth, Salma Hayek, Famke Janssen, Robert Patrick, Christopher McDonald, Jon Stewart and Daniel von Bargen. And Usher. Everyone does a great job. And Usher.

The script by Williamson and the direction by Rodriguez are both as cine-literate as you'd expect, with ever scene throwing up a wealth of references, in-jokes and foreshadowing. It's a very nicely constructed movie, one that works in terms of a teen movie and also a sci-fi horror without neglecting either. The fact that it's so subversive just adds to the appeal. I don't want to spoil any details for people who have yet to see it, but bad behaviour ends up paying dividends while fighting back against invading aliens. The soundtrack has some good tunes in the mix and the special effects are generally pretty great, mixing plenty of practical work with some solid CGI.

All in all, The Faculty is eminently rewatchable and just a fun time for fans of the subgenre.

8/10

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Machete (2010)

Well, ummm, I actually saw and reviewed Machete ages ago for Flickfeast.

That review is here - http://flickfeast.co.uk/reviews/film-reviews/machete-2010-2/

An easy 8/10 and great fun. But the best news, at this moment in time, is that it can now count as my weekly Seagal and saves my poor, aching eyes from any more punishment this week.

As the end of my Seagal quest approaches (and I've seen every movie that he's made so far with the exception of Clementine, a movie I couldn't get a hold of for love nor money) I have one thought looming large in my mind - the next quest subject is going to be someone or something much more enjoyable.

Does Seagal have some great movies to choose from? Yes he does. Does he have any actual star power? I'd be generous and say that there was a time when he did. Should he have made half of the movies in his filmography? Hell no!

Considering that it's supposed to be an old-school grindhouse flick, and also considering the fact that the Bluray doesn't have any extra features worth shelling out wads of cash for, I recommend picking up Machete on DVD and having a good time.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Machete-DVD-Danny-Trejo/dp/B0049EO130