Prime Time: The Killer's Game (2024)

The second feature film directed by J. J. Perry (after the enjoyable Night Shift), I have to start this review by saying that there was a lot here that seemed to be appealing directly to me. I like both Dave Bautista and Sofia Boutella, who have main roles here. I like a lot of movies about hitmen, of which this is one. And I like a lot of people in the supporting cast, from Scott Adkins to Terry Crews, and from Alex Kingston to Pom Klementieff . . . and I suppose that Ben Kingsley does okay in the right role. So it's a shame that this was so awful. 

Bautista plays Joe Flood, one of the best hitmen in the business. He meets a beautiful dancer named Maize Arnaud (Boutella), and that makes him start to consider retirement. Retirement isn't always a luxury afforded to hitmen though, especially when they have been as busy and successful as Joe. But when he is given bad news by a doctor, Joe decides the best thing to do is to put a contract on himself. Unfortunately, he soon discovers that he has a big reason to renegotiate, but Antoinette (Klementieff) isn't interested. She's sent out the call and a number of flamboyant killers have answered.

Apparently based on a book by Jay R. Bonansinga, The Killer's Game has a screenplay, written by Rand Ravich and James Coyne, that is one of the most derivative and tired I have encountered in the past year or two. The hitman ordering a hit on himself is standard stuff now, as is the change of circumstances coming along too late to stop the onslaught of greedy mercenary murderers, and everyone involved having their own quirky style makes it feel like something that would have been much more fun about twenty years ago, before that choice was used in far too many other movies.

Crews is a lot of fun in his role, and Scott Adkins has fun putting on a Scottish accent to work alongside Drew McIntyre, but they are the only ones who liven things up. Okay, Dylan Moran is an unexpected delight in his small role, playing a priest who receives quite the confession, and Kingston has a couple of amusing moments, but nobody else seems to stay awake in front of the cameras. Bautista seems very stilted and slow, and he has no chemistry with Boutella, who is hampered by being the love interest kept in the dark for most of the runtime. Klementieff fails to make her potential villain truly menacing or memorable, Kingsley is so low-key that he seems to have wandered in from a much calmer movie, and that covers the people who actually made any impression on me. 

Perry can showcase some action that feels visceral and impactful, but he even undermines that aspect of the film by trying to make everything more fun and funky with each main fight sequence choreographed to some pop song that, at best, ensures the film has zero tension and, at worst, reminds you of whenever tht song was used in some other, much better, movie.

The pacing isn't bad, some of the scenes look nice enough, and I am easily entertained by groups of people descending upon one another to engage in a mass brawl, but this is generally not worth your time. It's a huge disappointment, and every single main cast member has a handful of better films that you could enjoy checking out instead of this.

3/10

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Netflix And Chill: Norbit (2007)

This is where my brain takes me, and I hate it as much as you do. I had seen Norbit many years ago, and I remembered not liking it. I couldn't find anywhere I had reviewed or rated it, however, since my reformed completist attitude to logging my movie viewings on both IMDb and Letterboxd. I saw it was on Netflix and figured I might as well give it a go.

Ouch.

The basic plot revolves around Norbit (Eddie Murphy), a timid young man who was abandoned as a baby and taken in by Mr. Wong (also, ummmmm, Eddie Murphy, in a bit of stunt casting more troubling than most of his multiple roles over the years). Norbit ends up in a relationship with Rasputia, an obnoxious and overpowering woman who doesn't really treat Norbit as he might deserve to be treated. And the adult Rasputia is played by, yes, Eddie Murphy. Things start to look different when an old flame, Kate (Thandie Newton), comes back to town.

The first of a few movies that Murphy starred in while being directed by Brian Robbins, this remains arguably the worst of their collaborations, despite the stiff competition from their other outings. Based on a story by Eddie and his brother, Charlie, the screenplay was then worked on by the two of them, with additional work from Jay Scherick and David Ronn, a writing duo who have a filmography most politely described as a bit hit and miss. Nobody involved can really make the material more palatable, which leaves the comedy falling flat at almost every turn.

Murphy is decidedly okay as Norbit, but only because he's more relatable and human in that incarnation than he is in either the role of Rasputia or Mr. Wong, with both of them being exaggerated caricatures designed to get easy laughs from the low-hanging fruit. Fortunately, although Murphy gets the lion's share of the screentime, there's some enjoyment to be had with the supporting cast. Terry Crews is as fun as ever, Eddie Griffin and Katt Williams have a couple of fun moments, Marlon Wayans is more amusing here than he has been in anything else from the last couple of decades, and Newton is an appealing romantic interest. You also have Cuba Gooding Jr. here, and he ends up being a LOT of fun as the man due to marry Newton, the fly in the ointment of Norbit's potential happiness.

Any fan of Murphy nowadays will know that they have to suffer through some real clunkers if they are completing a journey through his filmography. I've not seen EVERYTHING yet (that Pluto Nash movie has never felt like a high priority), but it's hard to think of anything he could do that is worse than this. It's not funny, it's full of characters you don't ever really care about, and it's just another excuse for Murphy to get made up and act in scenes alongside himself. And did I mention that it wasn't funny? Because it REALLY isn't.

2/10

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Prime Time: Street Kings (2008)

Street Kings is a gritty cop thriller directed by David Ayer AND based on a story by James Ellroy so, basically, if you go into it expecting any of the main characters to be unselfishly trying to do good in a bad world then you've never experienced any previous stories from either man. But, just in case there was any doubt, the whole thing helps to let viewers know what they are in for when the main character gets beaten up by some criminals and has his car stolen, which we then discover is all part of a plan to allow him to find where the crooks are holed up, with young female kidnap victims being kept there until they can be moved/sold on, and he then gets to barge in, shooting to kill. It's a good deed, in the grand scheme of things, but it's also symptomatic of the way this character acts. He'd also had a couple of drinks beforehand. He wasn't interested in any due process. He is someone being watched with interest by those who investigate such individuals in the force.

All of this is just a taster to the rest of the film, of course, which follows Detective Tom Ludlow (Keanu Reeves) as he tries to keep doing the job the way he prefers to do it while keeping himself protected from the prying eyes of those who want him stopped. He's helped in this regard by his captain (Forest Whitaker). One of the people wanting him stopped is his ex-partner, Detective Terrence Washington (Terry Crews), and things start to look even stickier for Ludlow when he and Washington are caught in a seemingly random shoot-out. Washington is killed, and Ludlow wants to find those who did it. But those who know Ludlow's behaviour think it would be best for all concerned if the case was dropped and the shooters left to get themselves arrested or killed on some other occasion.

Although there are plenty of beats here that are very familiar to fans of Ayer's work, Street Kings does turn into something slightly different once it gets beyond the opening third act. It's still not a million miles away from anything else the director has done, but the more interesting developments stop it from feeling like nothing more than a tired rehash. You can feel the Ellroy heart beating through most of the runtime, once that opening act is out of the way, and the screenplay put together by Ellroy, Kurt Wimmer, and Jamie Moss is solid in terms of the plotting, pacing, and character development. That's not to say that it's always believable, not at all, but there's enough done to distract you from/let you forgive the less believable moments.

Reeves is very good in the lead role. He's not on top form, it's always a bit harder to believe him as someone with such a murky moral code, but he does well enough. Whitaker gives one of his standard turns, and is good enough, and Crews does enough to show himself as a viable threat to his ex-partner before the shooting takes him out of the film. The rest of the cast is full of great performers, although they are not all used as well as they could be. Chris Evans is the highlight, playing the detective in charge of the shooting investigation who ends up allowing Reeves to help him, and you also get Hugh Laurie with an American accent again, and Jay Mohr, John Corbett, and Amaury Nolasco playing the main colleagues who accept that getting the job done often means breaking some rules. Naomie Harris and Martha Higareda try their best, despite being given the usual short shrift that women tend to get in Ayer movies, and there are good little moments for Cedric The Entertainer, Common, and The Game.

Far from essential viewing, this remains a film I would highly recommend to those who like this particular subgenre. The various elements are well put together, it feels like something a bit different for Reeves, and the ending is surprisingly satisfying when everything eventually pays off.

7/10

You can buy the movie here.
Americans can buy it here.

Serving Sara (2002)

There was a time when I thought that Matthew Perry should have done well in his film career. I always thought he was the funniest main member of the Friends cast (well . . . second to Lisa Kudrow) and he had a way of being cheeky while still remaining likeable. Sadly, you wouldn't know that from most of his film roles. It would be unfair to say that he kept picking duds. He obviously tried to stick with what was viewed as a winning formula, and I happen to like both Three To Tango and The Whole Nine Yards, but it soon became clear that his talent was best contained in episode form, as opposed to lead roles on the big screen.

Serving Sara, the tale of a process server (Perry) who tries to catch an elusive target (Sara, played by Elizabeth Hurley) until he is convinced by her that they should actually turn the tables on her scurrilous husband (Bruce Campbell), is far from the worst thing he has starred in. The plot is light enough to allow the leads space to have plenty of fun, there are some great line deliveries from Perry, and there's one sequence that seems specifically designed to get Elizabeth Hurley out of an everyday outfit and into something much more revealing (which is good news if you're a fan).

Director Reginald Hudlin does well enough, keeping things looking good enough to help viewers forget that most of the budget seems to have been spent on putting the cast together. There's nothing that stands out here, it's all just put together competently enough when it could have easily been a much lazier and sloppier film.

Writers Jay Scherick and David Ronn do a lot better here than they have done with many other entries in their filmography. Although weaker than many better comedies, I wouldn't have believed that this was from the same people who gave us National Security, Norbit, and Baywatch (although, in the interest of full disclosure, I actually rate that one about the same as this - and will always remind people of how easily pleased I can be).

But it's the cast who really help to keep this enjoyable throughout, even if Perry doesn't quite do enough to sell himself as a viable leading man. There may not be any chemistry between Perry and Hurley but they both always seem to be having fun, which helps a lot. Campbell is a lot of fun as the husband who wants to divorce his wife in a way that will leave him with all of his acquired wealth, and Cedric The Entertainer and Vincent Pastore are amusing as, respectively, the boss and competing colleague of Perry's character. Jerry Stiller pops up as a cop who is willing to offer helpful information for the right price, Terry Crews is the tough guy hired to ensure Campbell's character doesn't get served, and Amy Adams has a small amount of screentime as "the other woman".

Serving Sara is the kind of breezy comedy you may well find yourself catching on a TV channel one afternoon or evening. You then watch some of it, don't mind what you see, and watch some more, all the way to the end. Unless someone else picks up the remote control and presses the menu button to remind you of the better options playing on some of the other channels. It's inessential, it's forgettable, and it's perfectly passable comedy entertainment.

5/10

You can buy the movie here.
Americans can buy it here.

The Expendables 3 (2014)

Well, here we are again. I enjoyed The Expendables, as did many other people. The Expendables 2, on the other hand, fell a bit flat. It was too busy being smug and self-referential to work as well as the first movie. Thankfully, this third outing is a bit of a return to form.

The plot this time sees Barney Ross (Sylvester Stallone) recruiting some newcomers to help him track down a very bad man (Mel Gibson) who was once one the same team as Barney. But will the newcomers be up to the task? Or will Barney still need some help from his regular colleagues (Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren, Terry Crews, Randy Couture, and Jet Li)?

That's all you need to know. The essence of the movie has already been made clear from the advertising campaing. If you haven't seen it then let me surmise it for you just now: STALLONE, STATHAM, LUNDGREN, CREWS, COUTURE, LI, SCHWARZENEGGER, BANDERAS, SNIPES, FORD, ROUSEY, ORTIZ, LUTZ, POWELL, GIBSON. If this is successful enough to lead to a fourth movie then they're going to need a much bigger poster, because it's all about mixing the action beats with more star power than you'd usually glean from a dozen movies of this ilk. Everyone does a good enough job, all clearly having fun, and that fun is infectious. Gibson is a bit underused, although he does his best with the role, but these movies always struggle to give everyone enough screentime (Harrison Ford only gets a few minutes, and Jet Li pops up for what amounts to a fleeting cameo).

Before opening in cinemas nationwide, The Expendables 3 was already getting a lot of attention for two main reasons. One, the content was being toned down to appeal to as wide an audience as possible. Two, a torrent of DVD quality leaked online a few weeks before the big release date. For the first part, I have to say that I didn't notice this being a lighter affair. There may be less actual bloodshed, but the fights and stunts are all still top-notch stuff. As for that torrent, the conspiracy theorist in me wonders whether or not someone had the bright idea of doing that to head off any potential disappointment at the box office. I recommend seeing the movie in the cinema, with all of the action accompanied by some major, seat-rumbling, surround sound, and I hope it actually does well enough to satisfy all those involved.

Patrick Hughes may be the director this time, with Stallone on screenwriting duties once again (this time accompanied by Creighton Rothenberger and Katrin Benedikt), but this is a film, and indeed a franchise, that seems designed to work no matter who is behind the scenes. It's all down to the stars, it's down to the set-pieces, and it's down to the many fantastic stunt performers who help create such memorable moments.

Highlights include an opening sequence that celebrates Wesley Snipes joining the crew, and actually features a winking gag that works well, a sequence in which Stallone is joined by Kelsey Grammer as he looks to recruit his new team, Banderas being a non-stop motormouth, and pretty much any scene starring the lovely Ronda Rousey.

It's cheesy, it's dripping with machismo, it's completely over the top. In short, it's in line with the series, and delivers exactly what fans will be hoping for.

7/10

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Ani-MAY-tion Month: Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs 2 (2013)

I really enjoyed Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs. Really REALLY enjoyed it. So I don't know why I assumed the sequel was just some rushed cash-in, without any of the same people in the main voice roles. It's not. In fact, this is a sequel on a par with the first movie. It's consistently cute from start to finish, but manages to undercut that cuteness with sharp humour, amusing puns (okay, I found some of them hilarious), and bright, imaginative sequences throughout.

Leading directly on from the events of the first movie, the residents of Swallow Falls are invited to move elsewhere while their island and town are cleaned up. Inventor Flint Lockwood (Bill Hader) is given the chance of a lifetime, when he's offered a job at LIVE Corp, the company ruled over by his hero, Chester V (Will Forte). But Chester V has a secret agenda, and only wants Flint nearby to keep an eye on him. The machine that caused so much trouble in the first movie hasn't shut down. It is, in fact, now helping to create a variety of food-based lifeforms. Flint is asked to go back to the island to help fix the situation, and his friends won't let him go back alone.

Just like the first movie, every aspect of this film just feels right. That's not to say that it's a perfect film, oh no, but it IS a load of fun from start to finish, full of creativity and jokes that should make you laugh out loud (well, they made ME laugh out loud). Hader and Forte are both very good in their roles, but they're helped out by a supporting cast that includes Anna Faris, Andy Samberg, Benjamin Bratt, James Caan, Terry Crews (voicing the character originally voiced by Mr. T in the first film), and Kristen Schaal.

Directors Cody Cameron and Kris Pearn have a lot of fun working from the script by Erica Rivinoja, John Francis Daley and Jonathan M. Goldstein. They have so much fun, in fact, that it fills up almost every frame, guaranteeing that viewers of all ages will keep smiling throughout.

Anyone who hates some quality punning may be a bit put out, but I distrust anyone who hates some quality punning anyway. Everyone else is pretty much guaranteed a great time. If you liked the first movie as much as I did then you'll also like this. It's smart, it's silly, it's highly rewatchable. Get to it ASAP if you have good taste (taste, see, because of all the food content in the movie - see? See?).*

8/10

http://www.amazon.com/Cloudy-Chance-Meatballs-Disc-Combo/dp/B0090SI39I/ref=sr_1_4?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1399762396&sr=1-4&keywords=cloudy+with+a+chance+of+meatballs+2

*Yeah, sorry about that.

Idiocracy (2006)

Another comedy written (with a helping hand from Etan Cohen) and directed by Mike Judge, Idiocracy is another out and out winner that once again shows how Judge seems to easily and unnervingly get to the heart of what elements in our society are so soul-sapping and painful that laughing AT them is the only way to stay sane.

This time around he's looking at the dumbing down of our culture and the whole world. In fact, the downward spiral of the world's IQ is put forward with horribly believable rationale and Idiocracy scores major points by mixing the absurd and hilarious with the prescient and scarily believable.

Luke Wilson stars as Joe Bauers, a completely "average Joe". He's in the military, coasting along, and happy with his lot in life. Everything changes when he's chosen for an experiment that will see him frozen in hibernation for some time and then reanimated. His fellow test subject is Rita (Maya Rudolph), a prostitute, and the two are nervous as the hibernation tanks close around them. 500 years later, after being forgotten about and left under rubbish and rubble, a freak accident releases the sleeping duo and they wander around to find themselves on a planet that can barely spell IQ. Joe is now the smartest man on Earth but that doesn't mean that he'll avoid getting himself in trouble.

Luke Wilson and Maya Rudolph are great fun in the lead roles while Dax Shepard, Terry Crews, Sara Rue, Stephen Root and Thomas Haden Church are among the cast members having a ball acting dumber than a bag of hammers.

The script is very funny, very funny indeed - mixing the superdumb with the subversive and clever - and great scene follows great scene. However, the main premise keeps the movie down ever so slightly. Call me a naive optimist but I like to think that the human race wouldn't become quite THAT stupid, even if the evidence seems to pile up every day to try and prove me wrong. The movie is a farce, albeit a superb farce full of numerous, individual, laugh out loud moments.

Mike Judge is one of the best comedy directors in modern cinema. He's smart, very observant and, most importantly (of course), damn funny. If you haven't found that out for yourself yet then I urge you to check out any of his movies as soon as possible.

7/10

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Idiocracy-DVD-Luke-Wilson/dp/B000N3T2CQ/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1343571965&sr=8-1